Grandma moved some trash from my dresser and set the flowers down. For a second, she stood with her arms crossed, staring at the arrangement.
“They’re beautiful,” she said.
Of course they were. “They cost enough to be.”
She chuckled softly and walked over to my bed. “Scooch.”
I shifted my legs over so she’d have a space to sit, and she settled down onto the mattress. Her eyes trailed around my room and landed on the picture of my mom when she was pregnant with me.
“Your mother loved to read,” Grandma said.
That was out of the blue. But Grandma’s eyes had that misty, far-off look, so I stayed quiet.
“Sometimes, it seemed like reading was the only thing we had in common...”
My chest ripped just a little bit more at the pain in Grandma’s voice.
“I named her Celie after the main character in The Color Purple. It came out the year she was born.”
I knew that. Sometimes, I watched the movie just to feel closer to Mom. I wasn’t a reader like they were.
Grandma rubbed my leg. “Sometimes, it amazed me how true that name ended up being for your mother. Celie was an amazing character. She overcame tremendous pain, mentored other women, practiced forgiveness...I wish I could have seen the woman your mother would become. She was so excited to meet you and be a mom.”
My eyes burned, and more tears soothed the sting. Grandma had tears of her own.
“Her favorite genre to read, though, was romance,” Grandma said. “When we were talking about what to name you, she immediately said Fabio, and I was so surprised.”
I shifted and propped myself up on my elbows. I hadn’t heard this story yet, just that I was named after Fabio because Mom liked romance.
Grandma brushed back some hair that had stuck to my forehead. “I said, ‘Why in the world would you name your son after this bare-chested man?’ And your mom kinda laughed, smiled at her stomach. She said, ‘Fabio is a fighter. A winner. No matter what story he’s in, no matter how impossible the odds seem, no matter what’s working against him, he finds a way to be the hero and get the girl he loves.’”
Grandma used her thumb to wipe at her eyes and took in a heavy breath. “I can’t think of a better or truer name for you.” She brushed my hair back again and cupped my cheek. “I don’t know how, but you’re going to come out of this smelling like those flowers over there. I just know it.”
She squeezed my shoulder and pushed up out of the bed.
After she left the room, I stood up too. I paced around my clothes littering the floor. My hands shook. Had my mom been wrong to name me after Fabio? I felt the farthest thing from brave and capable.
My stomach growled.
I did feel hungry, though.
I went to my dresser and picked up the to-go box. Something fluttered from my dresser to the ground. I bent over to pick it up and stared at the business card in my hand.
The employee from Bethesda that I’d met in Dallas...
I pulled out my phone and started dialing.
I was going to be the person my mom dreamed I could be.
Twenty-Six
Grace
Five days without talking to Fabio was too long. Every time I saw something funny, I wanted to tell him. Every time I felt sad, I wished he could console me. Every time I scrolled past his contact card in my phone, I wanted to call him.
But instead, I sat on the couch with my little sister, still wearing my pajamas even though it was nearly suppertime. I scrolled through Instagram, wishing Fabio posted more often. His last post had been three months ago of a new video game.
I wanted to see him, hear from him, hug him...feel his lips on mine. Forgetting his touch would be my worst nightmare.
His named appeared on my phone. A new text.
I blinked.
I had to be imagining things. But no, there were his words, in plain English.
Fabio: I’m coming over. We need to talk.
I read it again, just in case.
Another message came up.
Fabio: I’ll be there at five.
My eyes landed on the time. I had half an hour to get out of my pajamas and look like I hadn’t been sulking and binge-watching corny Netflix rom coms with my little sister.
I lurched out of the dent I’d made in the couch.
“Watcha doing?” Fei asked.
“Fabio’s coming over!”
“You want me to pause it?”
Did she not get what a rush I was in? “No, you watch it!” I yelled from down the hallway.
I dug through my dresser, trying to find the Hufflepuff shirt he’d gotten me for my birthday. Finally, I found it, threw it over my head, and tugged on a pair of denim shorts.
Putting on clothes was easy, but my face...
I hurried to the bathroom, washed my face, and flicked a mascara wand over my lashes.
And it might have been a purely hopeful gesture, but I brushed my teeth. I was not going to have popcorn breath if we kissed.
I didn’t know what this visit meant—whether he’d be done with me forever or if he wanted to make amends, but I couldn’t lose hope. I’d be moving to China, giving up my home and family and freshman year of college. I didn’t want to lose him too.
I went to the living room where Mom, Dad, and Cookie were working on a jigsaw puzzle and waited for Fabio.
Two slow raps sounded on the front door. Our knock for when we needed a serious talk.
My heart lurched. He was still using our knock. That had to be good, right?
Cookie started to stand, but I jumped up. “I’ve got it.”
She gave me a look. The kind that said she knew it all. Of course she did.
I went to the front door and opened it.
Fabio looked amazing. His blond hair caressed the tips of his ears in a new style that made him look more mature. Sleeping through the night had done him well, too. But more than that, he looked like my best friend, and that was better than everything else.
His eyes landed on my Hufflepuff shirt, and his lips quirked into a half-smile. “Can we talk?”
“Sure.” I looked back to the living room, where I could practically see my parents’ and Cookie’s ears perked. “Um...outside?”
He nodded but didn’t say more.
My heart thrummed faster than his fingers could fly over a game controller. I used to think Fabio couldn’t make my heart race like this, but now I knew better. Now, I wondered when, or if, it would ever stop.
He walked to the porch swing where we’d sat a million and one times before. We’d been sitting there when he told me he was failing gym, when I talked to him about my massive crush on Niall Horan from One Direction. We both probably wanted to forget those moments. But I hoped this would be a moment I’d never forget. In a good way.
I sat down beside him, leaving space between us so he wouldn’t feel uncomfortable. The bench swung back and forth, unsteady like our future.
He met my eyes, then looked down. “Grace, why didn’t you tell me?”
My heart jolted to a stop at the hurt in his voice. But he was giving me something better than I deserved: a chance to explain myself.
I took a deep breath. “I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want to break your heart.”
Fabio looked at me under his lashes, skeptical.
“I know that happened anyway. But I was going to tell you. I just wanted the moment to be right, and I was afraid. Sometimes, when you think you have to tell someone something that’s going to ruin everything, you hang on to the moment as long as possible. I held on to the moment too long.”
His lips pressed together, and he closed his eyes. But then he laid his hand palm up on his jeans, fingers spread, waiting for mine.
I put my hand in his, right where it belonged. “Fabio, I’m sorry, but I want you to forgive me. These five days have been hell without you. Every time I see a green gummy bear, I want you to pinch it’s head off. When there’s a new post on Pott
ermore, you’re the one I want to tell about it. You’re such a big part of my life, and I don’t want us to stop being friends—or more—just because I took this opportunity.”
I squeezed his hand tighter, like I could transfer understanding right through our connected palms. He had to understand this. He had to. “Because this is an amazing opportunity. Teaching children, starting at a brand-new school, being somewhere that I can really make a difference. It’s not something I can pass up. But I can’t pass this up, either.” I squeezed his hand a little tighter. “I’ll do long distance. I’ll video chat you every night and visit you when I can and get you a flight to visit me. We can make it work, no matter where we are.”
His eyes met mine, holding them hostage. “What if I don’t want to do long distance?” he asked.
My heart fell, crumbled, barely held on by a hair-thin thread. I could hardly form the words. “You don’t want to?”
He shook his head, resolute.
There it was, the broken thread, my shattering heart, falling out of my chest into the abyss. I never knew love could hurt like this, never would have tried climbing these peaks had I understood how deep the valleys would be.
I couldn’t do this. I stood up to leave, but Fabio still had my hand. He held on until I turned to face him.
He took my other hand in his, making this moment even harder, making sure I knew just what I would miss.
Tears slipped down my cheeks. Was this goodbye?
“Look at me,” he said.
And I did. Because it was Fabio, and no matter what, no matter how far apart we were, no matter how badly he broke my heart, he was my best friend and so much more.
He traced his thumbs over the backs of my hands. “I don’t want to do long distance with you because I want to be with you.”
But that didn’t make sense. “How is that supposed to work?”
His smile grew. “I’m moving to China, Grace. I got an internship.”
“What?” I didn’t hear him right. I couldn’t have. “I thought you got second place?”
“I did.” He stood, stepped closer to me. “Remember that Bethesda person I met at the conference? I called him. He has a contact who knew someone who had an open internship at a Chinese gaming company. I’ll be working thirty minutes from the orphanage.”
All that Fabio was saying sparked to realization in my mind. Fabio was going to China. I was going to China.
I reached up, took his face in my hands. “We’re going to China?”
He nodded, grinning.
I screamed. Literally screamed and pulled his face to mine, pressing our lips together.
Maybe I hadn’t seen it before, hadn’t known how thin the line was between friendship and so much more, but now I knew, and I was never going to forget it. Never going to let this incredible person out of my life. And by the way he held me close, kissed me like he never wanted to stop, I knew he felt exactly the same way.
Epilogue
Fabio
We all stood in the airport like a sad set of green army men, all taking on our respective stances. Grace’s little sister had her arms folded across her chest, silently crying. Cookie bounced between Grace’s parents and my grandparents like a giant dragon fly in a muumuu. Then there was Grandpa, muttering about communists. And Grandma looking uncomfortable without a book. Grace’s parents were just trying to hold it all together.
And then there was us. Me and my best friend. Six suitcases—four of them hers. She was even wearing a fanny pack. She said it was trendy, but I still thought it was lame.
I wasn’t going to tell her that, though.
All around us, people got ready for their flights, checking in, getting their tickets, going away. Just like us.
Grace looked at her wristwatch. “We should probably get checked in.”
Cookie waved her arms. “We must pray first.”
“Amen,” Grandpa said. “They’re gonna need ‘em where they’re going.”
Cookie ignored him and stuck her hands out. I took one, Grace’s mom took the other, and we all formed a small circle.
I was still getting used to the whole praying thing, but if I was going to be a part of Grace’s family, I needed to learn.
“Dear Heavenly Father,” Cookie began. “Thank you for bringing these two together and finally letting them pull their heads out of their—”
“Mother!” Grace’s mom scolded.
Cookie gave a mischievous grin and closed her eyes. “Thank you for helping them realize their true feelings. We pray you bless them with safe travels, an amazing adventure, and willpower stronger than steel.” She peeked at me, and I slammed my eyelids shut, blushing. “No babies out of wedlock for these two. Amen.”
“Amen,” Grandpa chimed in.
Grandma hugged me, shaking with silent laughter. “Have fun, honey.” She pulled back and held my face in both of her hands. “Sometimes I forget what a man you’ve grown to be.” Her eyes misted over. “Your mother would be so proud of you.”
I held her hand to my cheek. “I love you, Grandma.”
She squeezed me again. “Now get out of here, before I start crying.”
I smiled. “I’ll call you as soon as we get there. Ask John down the hall if you forget how to Skype on the TV.”
She nodded. “I will.”
And then it was Grandpa’s turn. He pulled me into a rough hug and whispered in my ear, “Find the embassy. And the McDonald’s.”
I laughed. “I will.”
“Good.” He winked. “Have fun, kid.”
I nodded and looked from him to Grandma. “Thank you. For everything.”
Grandma held on to Grandpa’s hand, openly crying now. “We’d do anything for you. You know that, right?”
I believed her.
As they walked away and Grace headed toward the ticket counter, I couldn’t help but think of how lucky I was. I had grandparents who loved me, an amazing internship waiting for me, and my best friend, my girl, at my side.
I had finally conquered the friend zone.
For more sweet romance, read Sincerely, Cinderella, the next book in The Pen Pal Romance Series.
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Also by Kelsie Stelting
The Pen Pal Romance Series
Dear Adam
Fabio vs. the Friend Zone
Sincerely, Cinderella
The Texas Star Series
Lonesome Skye: Book One
Becoming Skye: Book Two
Loving Skye: Book Three
Always Anika
Abi and the Boy Next Door
YA Contemporary Romance Anthology
The Art of Taking Chances
The Texas Sun Series
All the Things He Left Behind
Unfair Catch: Savannah’s Story 1
Anything But Yes: Savannah’s Story 2
Nonfiction
Raising the West
Acknowledgments
When I first thought of this story idea, I was nervous about including video game references, especially when my only real brush with gaming was binging on eight hours of FallOut and then getting killed and deciding it wasn’t for me! Luckily, my brother Tucker was able to help. I’m so glad he answered my questions, no matter how silly, about something that plays a huge part of life for him and so many other people!
I’m also thankful for the YA Chicks, Sally Henson, Cindy Ray Hale, and Yesenia Vargas, who gave feedback on early chapters of this book.
After I work through my story, I was able to place it in the skilled and capable hands of my editor, Tricia Harden. Working with her and seeing her embrace my voice as a writer has been such a privilege.
Of course, everybody judges books by their covers, and I have an amazing one thanks to Jenny Zemaneck of Seedlings Design Studio. I’ve so enjoyed watching these covers come to life!
My best friend, my husband, has supported me on every word of this journey. He encourages me, gives me time away t
o write and edit, and lets me ramble about imaginary people for hours on end. In many ways, I am thankful for him.
My mom has always been one of my earliest readers, and I’m grateful that even in adulthood that we can share or love of books!
My early readers and the amazing people in Kelsie Stelting: Reader’s Club have been a wonderful source of support and friendship throughout my career! Their kind comments brighten my day, their questions make me think, and their support means the world.
And you, the reader, are a huge part of this story. I wrote every word with you in mind, and I hope that it made you smile at least once. Thank you for sharing these words with me.
Author’s Note
As an introvert, I’ve never had many friends. Maybe a few close ones I could talk to from time to time. Mostly because making and keeping friends is hard. It takes vulnerability, openness, honesty, time, commitment, and if you’re a recovering control freak like me, the power to keep your mouth shut and let others make their own mistakes.
Even then, some friendships don’t last. You might move away and phone calls grow more and more infrequent. Sometimes you have a difference of opinion that creates a rift. And other times, for no reason at all, a person decides to step out of your life. That’s especially tough, when you’ve invested so much time—so much of yourself—into that relationship.
But not all friendships are made to last. Some people come into your life for a short season, to support you or maybe teach you a lesson. Some are there for years and years. And then there are those you are close to for life.
If you’re ever lucky enough to have a friendship like Grace and Fabio’s, cling to it. Do all you can to nurture it. I’ve only had one friendship like that in my life with someone who wasn’t related to me, and I married him! Like Grace said, there’s a thin line between best friend-love and forever love.
I hope in your life, you’ll be on the receiving love end of a love like that. But even more, I hope that you’ll be on the giving end of a love like that. Everyone deserves a good friend, and even though we can’t always decide who comes or stays in our lives, we can always be that friend for someone else.
Fabio vs. the Friend Zone (The Pen Pal Romance Series) Page 11