As Noah went back to reading the tablet to research his new role, Bane and Aunt Lily went out to put all the fire-fighting equipment away. I moved over to the couch in a daze, staring out the window at the rain. My mind was flipping like a fish out of water between the calling of the storm and Bane’s kiss. There just didn’t seem to be any room left in my brain to think about anything else, and anyway I refused to let myself think about skinny little Tessa Bright for even a second.
A little while later Noah found a blanket and wrapped it around my shoulders. I must have been cold but I hadn’t noticed. Outside, the rain was starting to ease off, which came as a massive relief. I had been quietly concerned that it would keep going until I sent it away and I honestly didn’t know how to do it. I’d even had a panicked thought that maybe one of my predecessors had done something similar and accidentally been responsible for the Great Flood because they couldn’t switch it off. Maybe Noah really was named after one of his ancestors …
Aunt Lily shook me awake. ‘Are you all right?’
I nodded, wiped away the usual tears and mumbled something about a bad dream. Someone had wrapped me up like a burrito in the blanket and as I untangled my legs I noticed that the rain had stopped. Just as well.
Noah had already left to check on his family and I wondered what he would say to his mum. I felt like I should have at least given him some sort of booklet titled Cherubship For Dummies, but no one had given me one either so there wouldn’t have been very much in it. His mum would most likely be able to do a much better job anyhow. Hopefully she could clear up some questions for me too.
I yawned and stood up, deciding that I could really use a shower. My clothes and hair stank of smoke. As I passed the kitchen I could feel Bane’s eyes on me but I chickened out of looking back. What was I supposed to tell him? Loved the kiss, let’s do it again but just please ignore the fact that you don’t actually love me, you’re just compelled to make out with me so we can have little Cherub babies together and continue the line? I had visions of the traditional fat baby winged putti flying around the farm. People might notice. Maybe we could dress them in woollen jumpers and tell people they were sheep. Flying sheep. It was a bit startling to realise how relaxed a mood I was in. The nap must have done me a lot of good. Or maybe it was the euphoria from creating my own personal weather system to quench a bushfire. Or maybe it was the other thing.
We got a call from the Country Fire Authority late in the afternoon to give us the all clear and ask if we could take in any injured wildlife. They warned us to remain on alert and not hesitate to call them if there was anything we were unsure about. Even if they saw no further evidence of flames they wouldn’t declare the region as officially safe for at least another twenty-four hours, just in case. Luckily Noah and I had managed to drown the blaze fairly quickly before it had been given a chance to really take hold. The CFA only considered it a minor incident, as bushfires went. Everyone knew it could have been a lot worse and so they were checking things out pretty thoroughly.
I’d spent the day trying to concentrate on my ‘spidey-sense’ to feel if anyone was getting too close to Eden, and all I’d felt were vague impressions of people driving around, far to the west. My mood continued to lift so I took that as a good sign. It probably helped that Bane and Aunt Lily seemed to be doing their best to do all my chores before I could. They were babying me terribly and I didn’t know why.
As the evening progressed I began to wonder if I really had ‘seen’ two people out there when the fire started. Considering I had been asleep at the time, perhaps it had just been a regular dream, rather than a vision, yet somehow that just didn’t feel right. Fire bugs were not unheard of but everyone knew how deadly bushfires were, and the punishment for arsonists both from the law and from the community was severe. It just seemed so unlikely that two people would be involved if that were the case. Maybe kids? I didn’t think so. The people I saw didn’t seem to be all that young. Still, I could hardly call the police and tell them I’d had a vision of two suspicious people out in the bush in the middle of the night just as the fire started. I hoped the CFA investigators would find something. So long as they looked well away from Eden, of course.
As I slipped into bed that night I cranked up the music in my headphones to try to distract myself from thinking about it anymore. It didn’t really help.
Relishing the brief coolness of the new day, I sat huddled on the old tractor tyre that used to be my sandpit as I bottle fed an orphaned joey and squinted hard at the clouds above me. A soft chuckle came from behind me.
‘Are you trying to make it rain or send the clouds away?’ Bane asked, bringing me a steaming mug of tea. I passed the pillowcase full of wriggling joey over to him so I could warm my frozen hands around the mug. It was still early and I had hardly slept. The young wallaby had been found in its dead mother’s pouch not far from the edge of the burn zone and still needed feeding every four hours. Luckily she hadn’t been injured herself, and was fully covered in hair so she had a good chance of survival, but she would need some serious TLC for the next few weeks.
‘You have to admit, we could run a great sheep station here if I could control how much rain we get.’ I puffed out a wistful sigh.
‘And? Any luck?’
‘I honestly have no idea how I did it. I know I was saying something but not in any language that I know. I just knew that I had the authority to do it.’
‘But not anymore?’ he asked.
‘Only the power we need, when we need it, remember? Just as well, I suppose. Who knows what havoc I would wreak otherwise. Let alone Noah—he would probably start parading around with his undies on the outside just to let people know what he could do.’
He waited.
‘Okay. Fine. You were right when you said there might be more to being a Cherub than just visions, but seriously, who would have expected that?’
I watched him cradle the tiny joey as it guzzled down the milk. It was hard to believe he was the same person that everyone had been so intimidated by at school. I really didn’t know who he was at all. Staring into my mug, I procrastinated for a full minute before choosing to do the right thing.
‘I’m sorry about yesterday. I should never have put you in danger like that. And also …’ I struggled to say the words.
‘I kissed you, Lainie,’ he said softly, still looking down so that his dark hair hid his eyes. ‘I’m the one who should apologise. I had no right, not after everything I’ve done to you.’
How could I explain this to him? As frightened as I was about his reaction, it would be unfair not to tell him. Inside my brain, my conscience wrestled bravely with my unruly teenage hormones. Then Bane smiled at the baby marsupial, his lips making a quirky little shape in the corners, and my hormones nearly won but my conscience managed a sneaky body slam and pinned them down mercilessly. I ran the tip of my finger nervously around the rim of my tea.
‘Ben,’ I choked. No sound came out. I cleared my throat and tried again. ‘Ben, Aunt Lily seems to think we’re supposed to be together. And I mean, be together. Like your compulsion to heal and protect me. It’s not your fault—it’s part of this whole weird package. I will find a way to break it though, somehow. You should be free to be with whoever you want, not forced into something like some old-fashioned arranged marriage.’
He looked up at me in shock, confusion in his large pale eyes, along with … hope? He glanced away before responding.
‘But Noah’s a Cherub … I mean, I was sure that meant that it would be him you would end up with. You’ve always had a strong connection.’ He thought for a moment, and then looked up at me. ‘You want to break it? This compulsion I have?’
‘Of course I do! I could never keep you here. You should be out in the world, making your own choices, not stuck here at the back end of nowhere your whole life.’
For a second he stared at me in utter confusion
.
‘Wait,’ I said. ‘If you thought Noah and I … then why did you—’
‘Because I thought it would be the only chance I’d get,’ he interrupted, hiding behind his fringe again. My heart stuttered for a few beats before I reminded myself that none of it was real. You can’t be ‘compelled’ to love someone.
He frowned at the baby marsupial, which was sucking so hard on the bottle it threatened to pull the rubber teat right off. He seemed thoroughly miserable.
‘Your feelings are not your own right now, Ben. Please, if we can just figure out a way to break this you will be grateful, I promise.’
‘Money back guarantee?’.
‘Of course. I’m a Cherub of integrity after all,’ I said with a relieved smile.
Chapter 23
Christmas morning dawned clear and hot. The storm system was long gone and the northerly wind whipped everything into choking dust again. We were feeding out massive amounts of hay because all the grass had turned to short dry stubble. Despite the sweltering heat we kept up the ridiculous traditions of a snowy Christmas by preparing a huge roast complete with baked potatoes and mulled wine. The woolly stockings hanging from the wood heater and the fake snow sprayed on all the windows were totally out of sync with the scorched landscape, but for us the decorations just meant Christmas, not winter.
We had always celebrated Christmas by having lunch with Noah’s family, so after we finished all our morning chores we packed up all the presents, the food and one rambunctious joey, and headed over to the Ashbrees’s farm.
Nicole greeted us at the gate wearing shorts, thongs and a Santa hat and beard. She trotted and bounced her way around the garden trying to catch hold of their dog, Blue. The kelpie was doing a good job of evading her so she could check out the interesting looking creature in the pillowcase I was holding. Kelpies just can’t be caught unless they want to be. I couldn’t wait until the pups we’d ordered were ready to be picked up. Our last two dogs had run away. Bungee had been about to turn four when he disappeared—he was a ripper little dog—and Gerdie was only eight months old when she went out for a walk with Harry one day and didn’t come home. We’d never had much luck with them.
Liam’s sharp whistle called Blue away, and she obediently skipped over to sit at his feet. I handed the joey over to Nicole, who went all gooey and suddenly looked like the thirteen-year-old girl she was instead of the stoic tomboy she always tried to be.
Noah came out of the house and caught me in a massive hug.
‘Merry Christmas, Lainie.’ He held on to me for a second longer than was normal. I hadn’t had a chance to speak to him since the fire and I wondered what his mum had put him through. Surely she’d understood why he’d left home to protect Eden? Knowing her though, she’d still probably told him off for putting himself in danger.
‘Merry Christmas, Noah. How’s Tess?’ I asked, extricating myself from his embrace and pulling out an armload of platters from Bane’s shabby old sedan. All morning I had sternly disciplined myself to try to come to terms with having Tessa around. If Noah really liked her then I would support them both and try to behave like the grown up I wasn’t.
‘Ask her yourself—she came for lunch.’ Had he figured out the connection between them? He had certainly figured out what Bane’s problem was before I had. It wouldn’t have been hard for him to put two and two together.
Caleb came out to help unload the car. ‘This your car, Ben?’
‘Yeah. It used to be Mum’s.’
‘It’s not a ute.’
‘Nope.’
‘Where do you put your stuff?’
‘Inside. Where it doesn’t get covered in road dust,’ he replied, lifting his chin slightly.
‘How much can it tow?’ Caleb teased.
‘No towbar, but there’s room inside for passengers. See? Actual seats. With seatbelts. So Lainie doesn’t have to get bumped around in the tray.’ He pulled out four bottles of soft drink from the backseat.
‘Personally, I’ve never needed room for more than one girl before,’ Caleb responded, his mouth twitching with suppressed amusement.
Aunt Lily stomped on his foot as she walked past him with a giant Pavlova dessert. ‘Leave him alone, Caleb,’ she scolded.
We all followed her meekly into the house.
‘Hi, Lainie. Merry Christmas,’ Tessa greeted as I entered the kitchen. Her pretty face looked thin and pale, but her smile was relaxed. At least she didn’t have that pinched jealous look anymore. As soon as I found a bit of room on the table to put the platters down, I gave her a polite hug.
‘Merry Christmas, Tessa. How did you go with your ATAR score?’
‘Not great. I don’t think I managed to get quite enough for what I wanted. I was hoping to do a nursing course next year, but it’ll be touch and go as to whether I’ve done enough to get in.’
Nursing. Perfect. She would be a great healer. I wondered if she would be able to heal me, and Bane heal Noah. It would be an interesting experiment.
‘How about you? How did you go?’
Noah handed us both a glass of sparkling pink wine. ‘She could probably get into Cambridge on her score, the nerd.’
I peered at the drink, certain that something so pink and bubbly couldn’t possibly be tasty. I took a sip and tried hard not to think about what Cambridge might have been like. All vaulted ceilings and stone buildings that smelled like wood polish and Skirlie mash for dinner. Tessa’s face began to darken in a familiar way.
‘He’s exaggerating, Tess,’ I said quickly. ‘Noah did almost as well. Besides, I haven’t even decided on a course yet. I’ll probably …’ But there was no point in finishing my sentence because Tessa was no longer listening. Bane had just walked in and she actually stepped backwards in surprise—or possibly that was just the self-preservation reflex that came from being at school with him for so many years.
‘Bane?’ she croaked.
‘Hi, Tessa. Merry Christmas,’ he said, avoiding eye contact by busying himself with finding space in the fridge for the drinks.
‘Uh, hi.’ She turned back to me with eyebrows that were clearly asking, ‘Why is he here?’
Another sip of the pink stuff didn’t win me over to it. ‘Bane’s working for us on the farm,’ I explained.
Tessa just looked from Bane back to me, then at Bane again, and I didn’t need any insightful visions to know what she was thinking.
‘And I haven’t even set anything on fire,’ Bane mumbled to the milk.
‘Yet,’ I mumbled back.
‘What would be the point?’ he muttered, making Noah crack up silently from behind where Tessa was standing.
When Bane shut the fridge and turned around, Tessa took a step closer to Noah. I tried not to smile as I realised she still saw him as a bit of a threat. Now that I knew what I was looking for, Tessa’s possessive behaviour really was quite protective as well. Bane turned to leave but I grabbed his hand. She would have to get used to him at some point and it wouldn’t hurt for her to think we were together. I hoped it might make her less defensive toward me, but all it did was make her blink at us in a sort of confused stupor so I let go again. I couldn’t exactly blame her. I didn’t believe it either.
As we continued to chat about our plans for next year I found myself getting distracted as I saw Noah’s parents outside, his dad’s arms around his wife, both laughing as they watched the twins wrestle on the lawn. They looked so happy and relaxed. How had they felt about being forced together by some supernatural compulsion? They didn’t look like it bothered them one bit, but maybe it had been different in their generation. Regardless, they seemed to have embraced the situation in a way that made me feel a little wistful, and I wondered once again about my own parents. I shook my head to dispel my overactive imagination before anyone noticed the tears that welled in my eyes. It was Christmas Day, and not a tim
e for dwelling on my dubious past and even more uncertain future.
Lunch was long and gluttonous and choc-a-block full of honeyed carrots, dumplings and inappropriate winter puddings. Afterwards we sat down to exchange presents on the front lawn in the shade of a huge hollowed out rivergum that had been there for centuries. Its bark was peeling like a Scottish tourist and a column of sugar ants were doing parade drills along its lowest branch. I wondered how many Cherubim it had known. Just how many of us were there? Aunt Lily had been confident that Noah’s siblings were not Cherub-kind. They didn’t know anything about it. Even just imagining talking to any of them about Eden produced a queasy sense of guilt at the base of my sternum that seemed to support that assumption. I was itching to talk to Noah’s mum, though.
Stretching out on the tartan picnic rug, I started chucking gumnuts at the back of Noah’s head, just to see if Tessa would notice. She did—when I missed and hit her by accident—so I sat up and concentrated on what I was supposed to be doing instead. I hadn’t been very inventive when it came to presents. I’d bought Aunt Lily her favourite perfume and Bane and Noah the latest video games: a soccer one for Noah and an army-themed one for Bane. Like the slacker I was, I’d left Aunt Lily to buy all the rest, and in return, I got pampered very unfairly. Noah had bought me the latest book in a series I had been waiting on—for which I mouthed a silent thank you to my aunt who had clearly been the one to suggest it to him. She, in turn, had given me two tickets to see a band that I liked in Melbourne. My wrestling hug very nearly bowled her over as I showed her just how much I appreciated her subtle message. She was telling me how confident she was that I would still be able to travel, and have a more or less normal life. I was not trapped. Of course, the twins saw it as a slightly different subtle message, and Caleb asked me in an overly innocent voice who I was going to take with me. I told him it depended on who sucked up to me the best and then asked Liam if he wouldn’t mind fetching me a glass of water.
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