“Meaning?”
“Think of us as the fire that can only operate on twenty percent flame while we’re in sight of your solders. The second we get inside, we will leave them behind and focus on the real problem. The undead, or Infected, or whatever you want to call them, they’re just a drop in the ocean compared to the real danger waiting for us. A danger your government agencies aren’t equipped to face.”
“So you’re part of what exactly?”
I shrugged. “It’s need to know. And, I’m sorry, but you don’t need to know.”
He frowned. “I should be aware of what I’m sending my people into.”
“No. You don’t. You need to trust me. To trust us. If I had my way, you wouldn’t go in at all. But I’m assuming you won’t humor me in that regard?”
“No. I won’t.”
“Good. Because we need the backup. But us going in with you is an advantage. Not the other way around. You let someone else come in and sort it their way, they will be ill-equipped to deal with the situation and make things worse. What you’re doing here—keeping an open mind—is a good thing. You need to trust your gut.”
“I have a responsibility—”
“So do I,” I interrupted. “More than you can comprehend.”
I let that hover. Hanley went to say something, but stopped. “We’ll have people on shifts manning the perimeter through the evening. Keep me updated on the shield.”
He left, and I released the breath I hadn’t realized I’d held. It appeared Karl’s advice was right on the money. Act confident, don’t give them the reins, and behave like I know what I’m doing.
I wonder if that kind of attitude works on lust demons?
“That’s it!” I said, storming into the tent. I stopped with abruptness when I noticed Libby sobbing into Bernard’s shoulder. They were both sat on the ground. “I’m sorry…”
“Great,” Libby sniffed. “Now she gets to see how low she’s brought me!”
“Bernard,” I said to my friend. “Give us a minute, will you?”
“You sure about this?”
“Yes. Go.”
He was relieved not to have to stay and referee us both. “Behave, you two.”
Libby said nothing, and neither did I.
Bernard knew Libby most. He’d brought her in on the IET. They were friends before all the drama, but I never learned how they met.
No time like the present.
Sitting on the ground next to her, I asked, “How did you meet Bernard?”
“Why?” She yanked the tie from her hair. The dark waves with hints of caramel highlights fell around her shoulders. “You want to take him from me, too?”
I bit my tongue. “I’m interested. Have you known each other long?”
She hesitated, trying to find more insults no doubt. “We met a long time ago. When I first came from the demon world.”
“Ah,” I replied, the rest of the words lost on my lips.
“I don’t like you,” she blurted.
“Yeah. Kind of grasped that already.”
“You’re always whining. Jumping into danger so people rescue you. You doubt yourself. Leap into danger and come out smelling of roses. And all the time, everyone fawns over you. It’s nauseating.”
“Sometimes, I don’t like you either,” I admitted. “You speak over and snipe at me. You look at me like I’m nothing when I walk into the room. You put yourself all over Kaleb to annoy me and kicked the crap out of me after Dolly died. I grieved for her too, but I had to find Bernard. I may make decisions you don’t agree with, Libby, but I’m learning, too. I’d love nothing better than to go back to how things were before. But I can’t. So I suck it up.”
“What? Things are hard with a team hanging onto every word? People listening to you, respecting you, loving you? That’s hard? Bernard is all ‘Terra this, Terra that, we must save Terra,’ Zax gazes at you with hero worship. Grady never shuts up talking in your direction while Kaleb acts so pathetic around you. And Mayra keeps saying, ‘Terra’s had it hard, you’d love her if you got to know her.’ It’s sickening. And I’m sick of standing in your shadow.”
“In my shadow?” I pointed to myself, laughing. “Have you seen the look on people’s faces when you enter a room? How they see you as a warrior and don’t keep second guessing you? You want to lead the IET, go at it. You want to go screw Bernard, have fun. I’m sure Grady will come around when he’s not hurting. But he’ll need more. Get to know him. See if you have anything in common. He’ll appreciate that. He was a total dick when I met him first, judging me based on my appearance. And even though it took a while, I broke through that while we worked together. And Zax… Zax is still trying to find his feet over here. We treat him as the kid he appears. Not like the dragon who demands our respect. He looks to me to lead. Nothing more. And Kaleb…” I hesitated. “I’m sorry if he hurt you. If I hurt you in that regard. But Kaleb and me were friends for years. I hid away my crush when we were younger because he enjoyed playing the field and I didn’t want to get hurt. But our bond deepened to a point where I didn’t even recognize the line of my feelings changing.”
She dared to glance over, her lips pinched together. I may have seen a flash of apology in her eyes, but then it disappeared.
“You didn’t hurt me,” she snorted. “And neither did Kaleb, so stop feeling sorry for me. We planned to make you jealous, you idiot. It was my idea.”
“What?” I demanded, suddenly on edge. Her face turned smug.
“Kaleb and me were never together. I mean, we tried. And, oh boy, did we try. His penis is—”
“Shut up,” I growled, not needing such a vision burned into my brain.
“Anyway, he hurt too much over you. Said he couldn’t have sex with me because I’m not you. That pissed me off, but there’s always another guy, Terra. Most men will want me.”
“Good for you,” I snapped, wanting to tear her hair out.
She laughed. “I told him that if he wants you so badly that he needs to do something about it. When he discovered you with Cole, it hurt him. He cried in my arms.”
“No, he did not.” My chest hurt. Nausea hit me.
“Yes, he did. Not sobs or anything. But tears rolled down his face. You hurt him by not telling him. He thought you were bonding. He was getting closer to telling you how he felt. Then he saw that. He came to me after the fight with the djinn. We kissed. Touched each other in a lot of places. I thought I’d finally have him that day. But nope. He couldn’t do it. And I got to come up with a plan. One to make you suffer.”
“What plan?”
“As I said.” She scowled. “Making you jealous. We timed it so you’d see us kissing outside my room. I climbed on his lap a few times, kissing and cuddling where you’d see us. When it worked, and you acted like you had PMS twenty-four seven, he felt guilty, and said we needed to stop. That’s when he kept telling you we weren’t together, but you didn’t believe him.”
“You were still all over him after that,” I bit out, vowing to kick Kaleb’s ass once he was on the mend.
But he cried for me.
“Hell, yeah,” Libby snorted. “I think Kaleb is awesome. And after he’d given me a taste of what kind of lover he was… well… I wasn’t about to give up on the basis you’d no doubt screw it up.” She laughed, but it sounded empty. Assessing me, she frowned. “This isn’t half as much fun as I thought it would be. I’ve had fantasies about throwing this in your face for weeks.” She sighed. “It doesn’t feel…”
“Right?” I replied, tired from dealing with such crap. “Nice? Sane?”
“Fun,” she said. “You hurt him. You deserved it. But you’re good together. You make him happy.” She rubbed her eyes. “I want that kind of happy with someone. Sex is great and all that. And duh, I’m a lust demon. I’m not giving up using my gift for anyone. And any sane guy won’t tolerate me doing such. But I’d give anything to have someone look at me like Kaleb looks at you.”
Empathy fille
d me at that moment, my gift giving it a boost, reminding me it was still there. It conflicted with the desire to push her over and shove her face in the grass. But the empathy won out.
“Have you ever had such a relationship before?” I asked, my words rigid.
“No,” she shook her head, “I haven’t. In the demon world, we often treat our mates as possessions. And sometimes, that’s great. It’s intense, deep, and passionate. But love doesn’t get a look in. They see it as a weakness. Over here, men are the same, but seduce women with the promise of love. I get an advantage with the pathetic humans because I can bring them to their knees, make them do whatever I wish when the lust takes over.” She shook her head in disgust. “It bored me after a time. I even considered going back to my ex Xayron and let him torture me again.”
“Your ex tortured you?”
“Yeah. That part was fun. But I didn’t appreciate the beating part outside of the bedroom. Or the collar he made me wore. He treated me no better than an abused servant, finding new ways to hurt me. It never satisfied him until he saw me break, and the more I tried not to do so, the harder he pushed.”
Something shifted in her at the mention of her ex. And it didn’t sit well with me. Libby shimmered from the self-assured bitch we knew, to a timid, uncertain woman who’d experienced great pain. I put my hand on hers, and she flinched, but she didn’t move it away.
“Your ex needs his dick chopping off,” I told her, hating she’d suffered abuse. I know what it feels like. The memories always sitting there, waiting to hurt you in your darkest moments.
“He had two,” she replied.
“Two dicks?”
“Yeah,” she sighed. “I chopped off one to escape.”
The laughter snorted out of my nose at such a declaration. I clamped my hand over my mouth. “I’m sorry.” My voice wavered with mirth. I tried to pull it back. But then Libby’s lips twitched. A laugh burst out. And before we knew it we were laughing over nothing.
If anyone had told me before that Libby and I would bond over a demon with two dicks, I would have called them a liar. But bond, ever so slightly, we did.
17
Libby wasn’t comfortable making peace with me fully. And to be honest, if she’d started being nice I’d have run the other way. But through our laughter, we’d returned to our old ground of just sniping at each other now and again. The glares had gone.
With our shared concern for Mayra, we headed out to the shield to check on her. When we got there, we relieved Zax who returned to camp. But if there was one thing both Libby and I could agree on it was Mayra didn’t look well.
“I’m almost done,” Mayra slurred, swaying on her feet. “Another hour. S’tops.”
“Stops?” I queried.
“Tops,” she blinked hard, “I mean tops.”
Libby wasn’t having another second of it. She wrapped Mayra’s arm around her shoulder. “Come on. You’re resting. And I’m not taking no for an answer.”
“No!” Mayra replied, but she had no fight in her. Her head slumped against Libby’s neck.
“Come on, my sweet,” Libby whispered. I barely heard her. But I also hadn’t heard her talk so nicely before. “Let’s get you to bed.”
Libby wrapped her arm around Mayra’s waist and helped her back to camp. I picked up Mayra’s belongings, a slight chill brushing the back of my neck. My head snapped around at the sense of the breeze tickling my ears.
In the floodlit darkness, the sight of the hundred zombies, standing beyond the shield, watching and waiting, ignited a deep freeze of fear in me. Anticipation filled air, and I felt alone. So alone, with the monsters preparing to animate. I gripped tighter onto Mayra’s things, and took advantage of no humans hanging around to run like hell to catch up with the others.
Libby and Mayra split off to the tent with the beds, so I lugged my friend’s magic box back to our tent.
When I entered, I discovered the others there, standing with their arms around each other. They appeared to be guarding something. “Hey guys, what’s up?”
I stepped up beside them, my mouth falling agape. Kaleb was crouched on all fours with patches of fur pushing out of his skin. “What the…”
“He started shaking out there,” Bernard told me. “He’s finding it harder to fight his wolf as the moon draws near.”
“Get her out of here!” Kaleb roared, fangs peeking over his bottom lip.
He trembled with pain. The agony, the hurt, so clear on his face. Usually the shift between wolf and man is an easy one, the magic of the shifters allowing for an easy change. They worship the moon—feel powerful beneath it—even if its power doesn’t control them like werewolves. But when the man fights the wolf, the pain consumes. And because Kaleb’s wolf couldn’t fight the call to claim his mate—because the man couldn’t fight the wolf—this was the result.
Refusing to leave, I got to my knees in front of him.
“Terra,” Bernard warned. I sensed his worry.
“He won’t hurt me. Will you, Kaleb?”
Putting a hand toward his cheek, Kaleb hissed and drew back. “Please,” I whispered, trying again. I cupped his face. He whined. “I know, baby. I know it hurts. But we can do this.”
“Noooo!” he howled, but bit it down.
“I won’t tolerate you in pain any longer. And if you say no one more time, then I’m taking it as an insult.”
The fangs shrank bank into his mouth. He caught a fast breath to draw in air. “Not. Fair. To. You.”
“Bullshit and bull crap. I get you for life, don’t I? That’s an awesome deal. But you’ve got to stop being so stubborn.” I stroked his cheek. “That’s my deal, and I’m not having you take it away from me.”
The fur curled back into his skin. “You’re. Stubborn.”
“Yeah. See? I’m stubborn. And I stubbornly love you. I want to become your mate. I need my guy at my side to fight zombies because I hate zombies, remember?”
“You. Said. You. Hate it because… It could. Happen. In real. Life.” His eyes shimmered back to blue.
“And it has, hasn’t it? I can’t do this without you.”
“Low. Blow,” he breathed.
I gave him a watery smile. “I’ll take what I can get.”
When he drew in more air, he shivered.
My Kaleb was back.
“Terra,” he whispered, his eyes pained. He brushed the hair back from my face. “I hate that you’re being pressured into this.”
“Are you kidding me?” I raised an eyebrow. “There’s only so much foreplay a girl can take.”
“Too much information, Terra!” Zax said above us. I laughed, helping Kaleb to his feet. But the thought of becoming Kaleb’s mate eradicated every fear, every doubt, that hovered on the sidelines. Excitement filled me.
I looked toward Bernard. “Not that I want you to be my pimp or anything, but where’s the best place to go close by? Somewhere with privacy?”
He smirked. “There’s a set of trees near the back of the houses they’ve evacuated. It’s far enough from here you won’t get disturbed, but close enough if we need you.”
“Okay.” I nodded, resolute. “I think we all need to call it a night. Get some rest for tomorrow. Mayra can’t go on any longer, but she reckons she’s almost done. And I’m not about to push her. We’ll assess where she is first thing.”
Grady stepped forth. “The training went well. It’s a lot for them to take in, but at least they’re aware of what they’re up against. I’ll finalize a few things around strategy, then call it a night.”
“Thanks, Grady.”
He nodded and exited the tent.
“Come on,” I said to Kaleb. “Let’s go get frisky.”
Zax groaned. “I give up.”
Kaleb managed a smile. “He’s just jealous.”
“I’m not jealous,” Zax muttered. “I’ve just never had to watch someone arrange a booty call while preparing to battle zombies before.”
I ruffled Zax�
�s hair. He jumped back and yelped. “Ugh. Don’t touch me with our pre-sex hands. That’s just gross!”
I laughed, and it helped. The heaviness swept out of the room.
“We won’t be far,” I reassured Bernard.
“Take the radio.” He threw one at me, and I caught it with my free hand. “I’ll call you if needed.”
“You’re a good friend. You know that?”
“I’ve gotta say, I’m getting a lot of firsts with you. Fighting zombies, setting up my ex-girlfriend and her mate up for a sex fest. Few vampires get to experience such things after a long life time.”
“You’re hilarious. Play nice. Get some rest.”
“And you. Don’t get doing it all night.”
“That’s it. We’re going.” I had to put the boundaries down with a firm hand before they began broadcasting my sex life across the whole damn army.
When we exited the tent, Grady came up to us with a sleeping bag and a flashlight. “Here you go, Vane. You’ll need these.”
My cheeks reddened. “Thanks, Grady.”
He smirked. “You’re welcome. Karl peeked up for a few seconds. He told me to, and I quote, ‘Go, Terra!’”
I groaned, helping Kaleb along. “We’re outta here.”
He chuckled at our exit. And I’m sure I heard Karl snickering away from behind me.
“They will never let us live this down,” I told Kaleb. He tried not to lean on me, but he used me to keep him going, urging him toward our destination.
“They will never let you live this down.” He breathed heavy against the pain. “I’ll just get a pat on a back.”
“Great. Nice to see double standards treat you so well.”
“Hey. You had me at the word frisky. I’m more than ready to become your bitch.”
“Asshole,” I muttered, a curve to my lips.
We made our way off toward the trees.
18
“Are you sure?” Kaleb asked me, giving me my final out. “I don’t want to cage you.”
Death Be Rising (The Terra Vane Series Book 7) Page 10