by Devin Sawyer
“I’m going to ask you to try.” His voice rasps out. “Because I have something I think you might like.” If it’s his dick, then he’s not being very inconspicuous. He grinds into me and lifts himself up and down causing friction between the sensitive parts of our bodies and I am breathing so heavily I fear I might hyperventilate. I can’t seem to steady my breaths.
“Breathe with me, darlin’.” Torren breathes in and releases. I try to match his pace and intake. As he breathes, he begins to rock into me in a rhythmic pattern, and all I can feel is the glorious sensory receptors in my groin roaring to life. His thickness is rubbing me in the perfect spot. I feel myself getting wetter and wetter, to the point that I worry if these leggings are ruined. Groans from Torren are guttural in his throat and that has to be the sexiest sound ever. I want his pleasure to surround me, but I can hardly focus. There is a pressure building in my core and I fall away from where I am. Only those overwhelming tingling and buzzing sensations are left. I have the ultimate tunnel vision as I chase after my breaking point and fall to pieces with a low throaty moan escaping me.
Torren stalls in his thrusts, his breathing so heavy it feels as if he is roaring. “I could watch that all day.”
I blush, crimson heat filling my face.
“You were so lost in it. You grew eerily quiet as it took you over. It was fucking hot.” I don’t know how to respond. I have absolutely zero experience in sex talk and so I blush some more, hiding my face from him with my tousled hair. He pulls the hair back from my face and leaves a soft kiss on my temple and in a mere second, I’ve gone from embarrassed to beautiful.
He stands and I’m too liquid in body and mind to ask what he’s doing. He throws his jeans on and walks out of the room. I hear him as he shuts the door to the bathroom in the hallway. After a few minutes, he returns and we both act as if he didn’t just go to finish himself off in a bathroom. I probably could have done that for him. I don’t really know what I’m doing, but I think I’m open to letting him teach me.
I appreciate that he didn’t want to force me into anything too soon. He returns to where I am still curled up on the floor in a post-orgasmic bliss fetal position and he pulls me into his body again and holds onto me as we stare back at the TV. I tuck my head into his shoulder and wrap my body into him, hoping that through osmosis we will become one.
I feel a light kiss to the top of my head and hug him tighter to me, this feeling is stronger and more powerful than anything in the world.
“When will your truck be done?” I ask.
“Yeah, I kinda fibbed about that earlier. I didn’t want to overwhelm you before you met Dad but my truck isn’t in the shop….”
I tilt my head to look up at him from our laying position. He eyes me closely before finally taking a deep breath. I can tell he’s reluctant to tell me something, but that’s a new thing for him. Torren is open and giving, always. He is the least secretive person I know, always preferring to be blunt and up front. This isn’t in his nature and I can see how uncomfortable he is holding it in.
“I sold the truck.”
“What? Why?” I sit up a bit to get a better look at him.
“I needed a little money for some things. No big deal.”
“Torren, neither of us has a car now. How are we supposed to work on balancing the books or, or, or see each other?” I stutter out the last part not knowing if it’s as important to him as it is to me.
“Nothing could keep me away from you Ace. I sold my truck because I needed some of the parts to finish up your car. Jeff’s coming over tomorrow and we are going to finish it up. As of tomorrow, you will be my official driver. I’m thinking of even getting you a little taxi hat, just because I know you’ll look so cute in it.”
“What?!” I huff. Barely able to breathe. “You sold your truck? To buy parts? For my car?” I stop intermittently as if each subsection is a statement and question that I present to him. His head nods and I feel light headed.
“You shouldn’t have done that. I won’t be free during the school year and you need your truck much more.”
“Don’t worry about it, Ace. I still have some money left from the sale. I’ll find something else here in a few weeks, by the time you get back to school. Until then it looks like you will be my ride.”
A grin spreads across my face and I feel my entire insides come to life around him. I lean into him and press my forehead against his. “You’re amazing Torren Holdridge, you know that?”
“I’ve been trying to tell you this since that very first day in the coffee shop. I just needed you to listen.” I kiss him, sliding my tongue along the cleft of his lip and he returns the kiss.
“You’re a big softy. It’s totally ruining that reputation of yours.”
“Maybe it’s time that reputation go anyway.” His voice croons over me and I fall and fall and fall into a world so enveloped by this wonderful man.
“I want to talk about next year,” he says timidly. I pull my head back from his to look into his eyes.
“I want you to follow your dreams, but I hope that I can be somewhere in them… I was hoping this next year we could figure out how I play into those plans and what I need to do to build my own dreams wherever you are.”
He is fucking perfect. I press my lips to him. Torren Holdridge, the so-called bad boy, is a motherfucking dreamboat.
“Okay.” My voice sings with soft delight. “But not tonight. I’m enjoying this.” If there was any holding back before, it’s useless now. I’m crazy about this loving selfless man.
This. This, right here, is falling in love.
Chapter 13
Torren
On Saturday I work a half day at the shop with Jeff and he helped me to replace the head gasket on Ari’s car. Working isn’t so bad when he’s around, but I know he won’t leave his high paying gig in the oil field. Once the car is complete, we both sit back and take a look at it. Each weekend he’s been home he’s swung by at least for a bit to help me on it. Jeff heads to his truck and pulls out two beers from the ice chest and we each drink one, cooling off from the hot Texas summer sun.
“So, this Ari thing. What’s it about?” Jeff probes.
We were never the friends to discuss women unless it was how they were in bed. Even when he and Chelsea fell apart, I knew better than to ask him.
“Who knows?” I say. “It’s still early.” I downplay my feelings and take a swig of my beer. It feels wrong and I don’t like it. “I like her,” I add on trying to soothe my guilt, but it only sours in my gut further. It comes out of my mouth all nonchalant. The way an asshole would say it. Truth is I want to fucking scream it sometimes, like it’s too big to fucking keep inside of me. Like the immensity of it all is rotting and wasting inside my mind. Like I should be telling her and everyone else around me.
As if Jeff could read my thoughts, he says, “Oh yeah? You ever tell her that?” And I wonder to myself if his feelings ever ran this deep for Chelsea, if maybe they still do and he’s just lost the ability to show her anymore. I would bet death could do that to you. Makes you afraid to lose. Makes you afraid to feel.
“No. Not in so many words,” I return.
“Hey dipshit, you do realize it’s only three words, right? Fucking tell her already.”
“She’s talking about heading off to school next year. I’m thinking about going with her.” The last part comes out slow and timid, not sure of what Jeff will think of this.
“Holy fuck. I thought you said it was still early? You skipped right past telling her you liked her. Don’t you know anything about women? Or do I have to teach you everything?” He playfully shoves me, and I laugh him off.
“Well, nothing is planned out yet so let’s not get our panties in a twist.” I push him back.
“Alright,” he says, crushing the empty beer can between his two hands. “Let’s get on the road. I’ve got an errand to run that you can help me with before we pick up Chelsea and Ari.” I toss my can into the trash lik
e it’s a basketball net and we hop off the tailgate and head to the front of the truck.
~
The so-called errand Jeff needed my help with, was a drug run. I hadn’t realized he was selling again. I think it’s insane and dangerous, our town is full of drugs and he doesn’t need to be a part of it. He lets me know that he’s in over his eyeballs in debt after purchasing his truck, which he didn’t need, and his mom is still paying off medical bills from his dad. I feel for the guy. I don’t want him running drugs, even if it is temporary. I want to talk to him about selling his truck, or anything to make some of the money back, but when night falls, we head to pick the girls up to go back to Jeff’s place in Glennville, to have some people over and he’s already in party mode. I’ll bring it up this week with him. Maybe Ari can help him budget something out too. She’s been really good with everything so far.
I felt empowered by my talk with Jeff this morning, our friendship crossing into new territory and I wonder how our friendship will fare if I do follow Ari. I want to be there for him, the same way he was always there for me, but that will have to happen later.
I look over to the beautiful, snarky girl sitting next to me. The windows down and the air blowing in our hair makes me feel like we are the only people around. Jeff continues to drive, and Chelsea lays her head on his shoulder. They seem equally oblivious. I lean over and kiss my girl. I haven’t really talked to her about her being specifically mine, but I also can’t imagine anyone else near her without being overcome with jealousy. I’ve never had that before. I never once cared if Leila was with other guys, but I would go mad if Ari considered it for even a second and I know tonight I’m going to make it evident to Ari that she is mine, as much as I am hers.
I clutch her face, holding her lips to mine, and slide my tongue across her bottom lip. A small sigh comes from her and I feel like if I don’t have her soon, I will shrivel up and die, starting at my balls. She’s gorgeously dainty, petite and fragile, and I’ve only imagined what she looks like under those clothes, every night, roughly around shower time.
I slide my other hand to her waist and pull her flush against my body in our awkward sitting position and push myself harder into her lips with my own, begging her to open them, and finally, she does ever so slightly. I meet her tongue with my own and kiss her with abandon, trying to express to her without words what I’m feeling. I hope she feels it too. It feels impossible that she could be oblivious because this feeling, it’s taking over my life, and filling my lungs like air.
Her touch finds my chest, and she glides a hand up along it, I want to watch her entire body melt onto mine. I reach up to her chest and place my hand just under the valley of her breast and glide my thumb over her pert nipple. She pulls back and blushes ever so slightly. I’ve embarrassed her. I’m an ass. I shouldn’t be pushing her to do anything yet, but definitely not in public, with Jeff and Chelsea in the front seat. My experience comes as a disadvantage to me with her, and it would be so easy to scare this angel off.
I grab her hand and weave my fingers in with hers. I give her hand a quick squeeze and look over at her, she continues to blush but a smile teases the corner of her lips and I commit the smile I brought to her face to my memory. I pull her closer into my side and simply nuzzle into her neck and get my fill of the orange coconut scent that she carries with her. She is being oddly quiet with me tonight, even more so than usual and I know she is running last night through her mind. I have too. We progressed physically much farther than we had been before, even though by my standards it felt like we hadn’t done anything. I want more. So much more. With previous girls, this wouldn’t even be worth talking about, but it’s a major step for us.
When we arrive at Jeff’s, I see the look of continued awe strike Ari’s beautiful face. She hates the way we live, and not because she’s better than it, but because she wants better for us. I try to encourage her, placing my hand behind her back, and we step into the small run down house. The neighborhood is a safe one, but it’s riddled with old homes falling to the ground. I greet everyone once inside, I suddenly don’t want to be here anymore. I introduce Ari to everyone as I pass them by and I show her off making direct eye contact with every guy to make sure he understands this is not open season. They are not allowed to hunt her, she is not their prey. After I have finally seen everyone, I gather closely behind Ari with my hands on her tan hips, just a touch of her skin showing from underneath her top. She wears this crop top for fashion, while the girls in Glennville have trended this for years, but it’s due to outgrown clothes.
I huddle behind her and lean into her ear. “Follow me,” I say just softly enough for her to hear it. She does, she follows blindly. I hate that. I love that. She follows me wherever I go, and I know it. I pull her down the hallway of the small home and into the back where Jeff’s room is. I lock the door behind her the second her body passes through the barrier.
She giggles. “What are you doing?” She stares at me wide-eyed, with a smirk on her face.
“I need to be with you. We shouldn’t have come out tonight.” I press my body into hers and push her into the corner of the room. She grows quiet, I know moving forward physically frightens her, but I only want to... I don’t know. Love her? That’s ridiculous. But I don’t know how to tell her what I’m feeling. I only know I have to somehow show her. I’m all over the place tonight. My heart is racing in my chest. I don’t love her, but I want to make her feel loved, because I know she deserves that. I’m also a selfish dick because I want more and more of her every time I’m around her. This feeling is all consuming. Everything about it feels dangerous and exhilarating. I miss her when she is gone from me. Like a phantom limb, I spent all day trying to feel her near me. The extra time I’m spending at the shop and with Jeff only amplify that none of those things, or people, give me what she gives me.
I lightly press my lips into her, when I really want to slam them to her, I want to take what I feel is mine and the illogical caveman that moved into my brain is chanting over and over to just do it, but I don’t. I take my time. I savor her, because I’ll be damned if I never get to have Arianne after how far the two of us have come. She moans the cutest little moan, and I grab her hips again. I slide my hands ever so slightly up her top to rest on her sides and stomach. I need more of her skin. I begin to quicken the pace of our kiss, and I can feel how I fall slightly from control, how the kiss turns feverish. I feel her weight lean into me, and I can tell her body wants more, but I don’t know what her mind’s telling her. An ancient R. Kelly song seems appropriate for this moment. Didn’t he know all about minds telling you no, but bodies telling you yes? It is in this lost though that Ari’s hands slip from my shoulders down to the hem of my T-shirt and I am brought back to the moment. She lifts it a half inch as if to ask permission, she’s hesitant. She definitely doesn’t know what she’s getting herself into. I let her believe she’s leading this though, and I cover her hand with mine to take the hem and lift it over my head. I toss it somewhere behind me. It doesn’t matter.
I go back to kissing her as soon as I get it off. I feel the delicate skin of her neck under my lips as I sample her. She has beautifully soft skin. I kiss her clavicle, and the bare skin shown by her top. Ari is watching me in awe as I move my lips across the temple that is her body. I’m embarrassingly hard inside my jeans. I want to consume every bit of her. I lift back up and take her neck into my hands and bring her lips back to mine. I pull myself closer to her, dying to get the friction I need to rub against her, but also mortified at how quickly I have escalated to this act of desperation. She stiffens after one of my thrusts into her hip, which is ironic, because she’s the second thing to stiffen in the last few minutes in this room. She just noticed why it is I have been thrusting against her, practically dry humping the shit out of her as I attempt to own her mouth.
“Don’t worry,” I tell her. “I won’t do anything you don’t want to. I’ll take care of you.”
I finger the
strap of her top laying against her shoulder. I lift it to ask permission and never break eye contact with her. She hasn’t moved again just yet. My breaths come heavier and quicker. I may have fucked this up. And then suddenly, she shrugs her shoulder delicately and the strap falls down her arm.
“I’ll be so gentle with you,” I promise. “Just say the word and I’ll stop”—an awkward pause— “but maybe also tell me if something feels good.” I grin, knowing that there is no way this is not going to feel good for her. It’s going to feel like heaven, I just need her to relax. I work my lips down her chest, gently pulling at her top with my free hand to lower it. At some point, I run into resistance and find her bra, and I slip my fingers inside it in an attempt to pull it down. I continue kissing her, never wanting my lips to leave her body for fear it would give her long enough to rethink her consent this far.
I grab for a chair, barely within reach at Jeff’s desk, all without taking my lips away and sit down. My face is now even with Ari’s chest. I’m finally able to get her bra and shirt shifted to her abdomen and her breasts spring free. She has great boobs. They aren’t overly large or anything, they are just perfectly shaped. Perfectly full teardrops. Her nipples are a reddish pink. Her skin around her chest is a bit red, like she is anxious or flustered, or scared out of her damn mind.
“Close your eyes pretty girl, and just breathe.”
When she does as I’ve requested, I suck one of her nipples into my mouth and roll my tongue around it. I stabilize her with my hands on her hips when I hear her gasp and feel the slight shaking of her legs weakened by lust. I pull on her other nipple, kneading it with my fingers, and I feel it grow harder between them. She pulls the rest of the way out of her shirt until it’s resting comfortable around her hips.
“You look beautiful.” My own voice is breathy and restless. I have fucked many girls, but I’ve never savored anyone like this. Never taken this long to be inside them. They were either down to fuck or not. I just know being inside Ari will be heaven when it happens.