by Julie Cannon
I’d bounced back and forth, trying to get my head around my feelings for Lowe. Her revelation certainly didn’t help. We were in a no-win situation.
“It’s not like we live on different sides of the country,” I explained needlessly. “Or even different countries, for that matter. That wouldn’t be ideal but still doable.”
“Planes fly all over the world, Faith.”
“I know, but this is different,” I said, but a nagging ping began in the back of my brain. “Don’t ask me to explain it. It just is.” I’d lost my patience and my equilibrium just thinking about it.
“Have you talked to her?”
“About what?” I asked, exasperated at Raul and his constant questions I didn’t have the answers to.
“About how you two can make it work.”
“Who says I want to make it work?”
Raul raised his eyebrows and stared at me like I’d lost my mind along with my heart.
“Don’t look at me like that.”
He didn’t change his expression or the tilt of his head. Does everybody hate their BFF when they’re right?
Thirty minutes later, I steeled myself, lifted my head, squared my shoulders, and knocked on the door. My heart was racing, and my fight-or-flight response was in full debate. I had raised my hand to knock again when the door swung open.
“Good afternoon, Mr. Carter. Is Lowe in?”
I wish I could read minds as Lowe’s father studied me. What did he see? A worker on his ship? Someone of a lower class than he? A gold digger? An opportunist? A woman not too proud to go after what she wanted? The woman who loved his daughter?
“No, I’m afraid she’s not,” he said finally.
“Landon, who is it?” I heard Mrs. Carter ask over his shoulder.
“No one, Francis,” he replied.
My heart sank, and my stomach plummeted. Nausea gripped my gut, and I was afraid I might be sick. That would be perfect. I turned to leave, proverbial tail tucked between my legs.
“Faith, wait.” He stepped into the hall, closing the door slightly.
As much as I wanted to take my humiliation and run away, I didn’t.
“Lowe moved out. She’s in room 805.” He paused. “I’m sure she’d want to see you.”
What was he saying? Why was he telling me where she was? Didn’t Lowe’s family think I wasn’t good enough for their daughter? They’d made it pretty clear to me. My stomach started to drift back to its original position, and my heart started beating again.
“Thank you,” I said, my voice firm.
“Don’t make me sorry I told you.”
“No sir. I won’t.”
Chapter Thirty-two
“What do you mean she’s not here?” I’d looked everywhere on the ship for Lowe after she didn’t answer her door. I’d run into Caroline, one of the pursers.
“Just what I said. She went to shore on one of the tenders this afternoon.”
“Do you know where she went?”
Carolyn looked at me, then asked, “I thought you were finished with your personal tour-guide assignment.” Her insinuation was clear.
“That’s not what this is about. Do you know where she went?” I asked again.
“What is it about?” she asked, frowning. She obviously knew and did not approve. What was it with people? Doesn’t everyone deserve to be happy? I needed to find another way to get the information I desperately needed. I toned my eagerness down a few notches.
“Nothing. It can wait until she gets back. Thank you.” I hurried off in search of the one individual who just might know. I’d made many friends on the Escape, some of whom owed me a favor or three, and I called in my markers.
The tender left me in front of a weathered bridge that led to my future. I had nothing in my hands as I walked across the hard deck. Once I found out where Lowe was staying, I hadn’t stopped to grab anything other than my shoulder bag.
I barely noticed the clear water under my feet or the birds in the trees as I approached the bungalow. I was looking for Lowe.
She was sitting in a chair on the patio and was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. My heart raced even faster, pounding against my chest, and the butterflies in my stomach did somersaults. I had never been so scared. I had absolutely no idea what I was going to say. I had no plans other than to follow her lead wherever it took us. I wanted us to be a cliché, where she swept me off my feet and carried me to the bed. I wanted to touch her, hold her, hear her heart beat in time with mine. I needed to have her arms around me, feel her body pressed against mine, her hands and mouth on me again, breathe her air.
Each step brought me closer to Lowe, and when our eyes met, the world started turning again. A knot formed in my throat, and I couldn’t speak.
Seconds passed in what felt like hours as neither of us spoke. Wasn’t my showing up here explanation enough? Didn’t the fact that I was risking everything provide enough words of commitment? I suddenly realized she was waiting for me to verbalize what I wanted. She’d already confessed her feelings. It was now my turn.
“I don’t know what I’m doing here other than I can’t stop thinking about you. I can’t stop thinking about how you make me feel and how I feel when I’m not with you. I don’t know how I’d live without you, and I don’t want to try. I realize your family doesn’t approve of me, and I’d never stand between you and your parents. Family means everything, and I’d never take that away from you. I said you didn’t know anything about me,” I said before my nerves fizzled. “I don’t know everything about you either.” I took the biggest breath of my life. “But I want to spend a lifetime learning.”
“Faith.”
“I know I’ve been hot and cold and probably driving you crazy. I don’t know anything about your business or Arizona but—”
“Faith,” Lowe repeated, louder when I didn’t stop talking.
“What?” I had at least thirty more reasons I was ready to convey to convince Lowe just how much I loved her and wanted to make a life with her.
Lowe stood and calmly walked over and stopped, inches from me. She broke into a grin, her eyes sparkling, then flaming with desire.
“Shut up and kiss me.”
THE END
About the Author
Julie Cannon divides her time by being a corporate suit, a wife, mom, sister, friend, and writer. Julie and her wife have lived in at least a half a dozen states, traveled around the world, and have an unending supply of dedicated friends. And of course, the most important people in their lives are their three kids, #1, Dude and the Devine Miss Em.
With the release of Shut Up and Kiss Me, Julie will have eighteen books published by Bold Strokes Books. Her first novel, Come and Get Me, was a finalist for the Golden Crown Literary Society’s Best Lesbian Romance and Debut Author Awards and I Remember won the GCLS Best Lesbian Romance in 2014. Rescue Me and Wishing on a Dream were finalists for Best Lesbian Romance from the prestigious Lambda Literary Society.
www.JulieCannon.com
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