by Jenna Gunn
Flowers dot the sides of the path that winds between the houses, and at the end is an arch with two big Sago palms on either side.
Just as we reach the archway, I hear his name called from behind us.
Bryce’s face is stone-cold serious when he turns toward the man who’s approaching us from behind. “Dad, not a good time to talk.”
The man is a thicker salt and pepper version of Bryce and Brandon. His age is undefined, and his tan is dark and even on his fit body. He continues to approach us at a determined pace. For a second, I wonder if I might witness another fight.
“I’m Ben Archer. You’re Recruit Carson, correct?”
I offer my hand to shake. “Call me Raven.”
“Well, Raven, you did a fine job the other night.”
He glances at Bryce. “Son, what are you…”
I see the second his eyes land on Bryce’s busted lip and the blood on his shirt. “What are you doing home? You’re on duty today.”
Bryce puts his hand on my back. “Dad, give me a minute. I’m going to let Raven in the house.”
I feel his dad’s eyes burning into me as Bryce hustles me inside. “Make yourself at home. Hopefully, this won’t take long.”
Then he disappears, closing the door quietly behind him.
Heaven help me. What a freakin mess.
My feet haven't moved from the spot where Bryce left me, and I’m frozen in a kind of stupor when I hear Bryce’s raised voice outside.
“I’m sick of everyone looking at me like I’m a disaster waiting to happen. I did something I wanted, something for me. I’m sick of living up to some reputation and standard. I know it was a violation of county policy, but I made the decision to do it.”
I can’t make out what his dad says, but Bryce responds, “Of course I respect her. She’s a grown woman who makes her own decisions. Don’t insult me like that.”
My heart races as I listen to him speak on.
“I wouldn’t change a thing. You don’t have to worry about me. I’ll land on my feet, and I’ll do what’s right by her.”
The sound of his feet moving closer to the door has me biting my lip, but he’s not done talking. “I threw the first punch. But Christian’s likely got a broken nose. So don’t be surprised when you see him.”
The door opens, and I wish I’d have moved. Now it’s obvious I’ve been listening.
“Sorry,” murmurs Bryce. “That’s over with now, I’m glad. I don’t have to think about telling him anymore.”
“What did he say?”
Bryce motions me into the living room. He drops onto the sofa and puts his bare feet on the big coffee table. “You know, words like disappointed, have you lost our mind, immature, unprofessional, pathetic.”
I wince as I lower myself into the big leather chair to his right. “Damn, that’s harsh.”
“Archers are not known for pussyfooting around. Stick around, and you’ll see it doesn’t pay to have soft feelings around here. But he loves me unconditionally. I’ve never doubted that. I just know he wishes I was something different.”
My heart hurts for Bryce. I can’t imagine that kind of pain. My mom didn’t pay enough attention to me to care or be disappointed. And since good ole dad is a mystery, I’ve never felt the sting of disappointment from the people close to me.
Guess I’ve only disappointed myself, which is hard enough.
“You are who you are. Don’t be sorry about that.”
“I’m not. I’m coming to realize that more and more. A few years ago, it ate me up. Now, I feel like there’s very little need to look outside myself for approval.
“That’s a great place to be.”
He sighs and glances down at his hands. “I’ve had a similar experience with relationships in the last few years. I used to feel like I needed that approval to feel whole. When my ex left me for a friend, I was destroyed. For a long time, I had one serial fling after another, looking for something. I don’t feel that need so much anymore.”
Pulling my ponytail loose, I massage my scalp, trying to drive away the tension there. “I’ve lived my life believing I don’t have to have someone…for anything.” I shake my head. “But apparently, we needed sex bad enough to completely derail our lives.”
Bryce drops his head back onto the sofa, but his serious eyes study me. “Is it just sex?”
I wait for a beat as I look at his handsome angular face and the busted lip, which he got because of me. “No, it’s not just sex,” I say honestly.
“You feel something for me?”
Swallowing hard, I feel myself falling farther into this crazy rabbit hole. “I do. And do you feel something for me?”
His voice is husky from deep in his throat when he replies, “Of course I do.”
I close my eyes, and both my hands find my face.
What in the hell has happened to me?
“Come here, babe.”
Somehow, my body moves on its own, and before I can make it do otherwise, I’m curled under Bryce’s arm on his sofa in his house. His strong arm wraps around me, enveloping me in his incredible warmth.
The quiet calm of his place, the strong wall of muscle against me, it all feels like the safe haven I need at this moment.
I glance around for the first time. The space is incredible—white stucco walls, big exposed beams, terra cotta tile floor, and amazing ocean photography. I see so much of him in the space. Solid, strong. Natural. “Your home is beautiful.”
“It was a labor of love. I like the way it feels.”
I nestle my head into his shoulder. “Me too. It feels safe.”
Bryce’s hand finds my hair and glides down over my head. “You haven’t always felt safe, have you?”
“When I was a teenager, no. The ugly truth is, I got dragged around by my mother, who lived from place to place with whoever she was sleeping with. Then, she abandoned me with an uncle. He was an alcoholic, and his house wasn’t fit for a teenage girl. Druggy friends, parties, you name it. But I started working, and I got out of there as soon as I could. Safety’s been a priority since I had enough to pay my own way.”
“That’s a terrible way to grow up. I understand more now about your desire for the job and the life you’ve been working to create.”
But now so much is uncertain. I feel the sting of tears at the back of my eyes. Angry tears.
Dammit.
“I’m sorry.” I push away from Bryce, but he moves with me.
“Don’t. You don’t have to pull away from me because you’re angry or you’re sad. I’m here for you. Lean on me.”
A sob catches in my throat. “I don’t know how to do that.”
“Shh, it’s okay.” He wraps his other arm around me. “I don’t know a lot about that either, but I think it’s time we both learn.”
He picks me up, slides me onto his lap, and circles his arms completely around me. “I need you right now. I think you need me, too, just the same.”
Tears start to drip from my lashes. They run down my cheeks and soak his shoulder. I’m not a crier. I. Am. Not. A. Crier.
“I got ya,” he whispers against my temple.
Finally, I give in, and I let the tears come. The sobs. The pain of so much more than what happened today. But I feel safe in his arms. I don’t remember ever feeling that way. Ever.
26
Chapter 26
My heart breaks into a million pieces as Raven cries herself out against my neck.
So much hurt. So much uncertainty. I feel every bit of it in her small, tense body as she clings to me.
I wish I could fix all of it. I don’t care what mountain I’d have to move to do it.
Finally, she cries herself to sleep. I sit perfectly still, absolutely determined not to move an inch. It doesn’t matter how long she sleeps. I’m going to make her feel safe and certain of this one thing.
The silence spins out around me, and my mind goes to every corner of my life.
What will I do if I don�
��t get my job back?
I’ve got money to last a while, but I’ll need to go back to work sometime.
This job is all I’ve known. Hell, it’s all my family has known for decades.
Maybe I’d be able to get picked up by the next county over.
They have a sucky department, though.
Well, I’m not bad with my hands. Maybe I could remodel houses.
What will Raven do if she loses the job? Will she stay?
My gut suddenly twists. The idea of her moving away makes me want to throw up.
That’s not going to happen. I’m going to make sure she gets to keep her job. Even if it means I have quit.
The sun dips lower in the sky. Raven finally stretches and unwinds, and I gently lay her down on the sofa before covering her with the fuzzy throw blanket my dad’s girlfriend got me for some holiday.
I wander toward the bedroom and discard my bloody uniform shirt in the hamper. With a tired sigh, I gather some clean clothes and head to the shower.
By the time I get out, it’s almost five. People will start showing up around Pelican’s Roost at the end of the day.
The rumor mill will be hot.
I have a feeling Brandon will make a beeline for my place.
It’s going to get interesting around here. Maybe it was a bad idea to bring Raven here.
Right as I walk back into the living room, I see a shadow I recognize outside my door. I rush to open it before Brandon knocks. His expression is grim as I swing the door open.
Holding my finger to my mouth, I nod toward the sofa.
He walks in quietly and follows me to the kitchen.
“Do you guys need anything?”
“Nah, man, I think we are okay. The fridge is stocked. If you can keep everyone else away, that might be good. Dad already intercepted us. I’m sure you’re going to hear all about how I’m his biggest disappointment.”
Brandon sighs. “What did you say to him?”
“That I don’t care what he thinks. That I wouldn’t take it back.”
“Good for you, man.”
A half grin edges onto my face. Ouch. I touch the split on my lip.
Brandon chuckles. “Christian looks a lot worse.”
“Good,” I say with a laugh.
His smile fades. “What did he say?”
“He walked in and said, ‘Just couldn’t keep your dick in your pants…’”
“In front of Raven?”
“Uh-huh. He was in rare form.”
He sighs and mutters, “Not cool. Why does he always have a chip on his shoulder with you?”
“Honestly, I think it’s because of the way I can meet women.”
Brandon twists his mouth as he thinks. “You have a good point.”
I hear Raven stir on the couch.
“I should go,” whispers Brandon.
I follow him to the door. Just as I close it behind him, I hear Raven’s phone ring. She rubs her eyes and searches for her pack. I deliver her bag to her. After a few more rings, she answers, “Hello? Hey, Jeremy.”
I’m frozen in place.
Jealousy courses through me like I’m hooked up to a green IV bag.
The courteous thing would be to walk away, but my feet suddenly decide to grow roots.
“I’m okay. Thanks for checking on me. I left early.”
A muffled voice on the other end says a few words.
Raven’s brow drops. “Look, I need to tell you before you hear from someone else. I got suspended.”
Jeremy’s voice is loud and clear this time when he shrieks, “You what?”
“I got suspended today. I won’t be at work for a while.”
Jeremy’s voice is getting louder. “What the fuck? How did that happen? Where are you?”
“I’m with Bryce.”
“Are you okay? I can come to get you.”
Raven frowns hard as she speaks. “I’m fine. No need. I don’t need a ride.”
Jeremy’s voice is taut, angry. “Why are you with Bryce?”
She sighs. “It’s complicated. We should talk about this in person.”
Like hell you should.
Then I can’t hear Jeremy’s reply anymore. Maybe because my pulse is pounding thunderously inside my head.
“No, no, I don’t know how long I’m suspended. I’ll be there later. I’ll tell you more then. ”
My hands clench into fists. The hell she will.
“Thanks, I appreciate you checking on me. Yes. I promise I’m fine. I’m safe, don’t worry.”
She hangs up and stares at the phone in her hands.
I clear my throat. “I’d be lying if I told you that didn’t make my blood boil.”
“Well, don’t tell me then. Because there is no reason for you to be mad or jealous.”
“I want you to stay here tonight.”
She gets up, and the lost look in her eyes pierces right into my heart. “I don’t know. I just feel like I need to be alone.”
What can I say that will change her mind? “Not tonight.” I say with my heart in my throat. “I need you.”
Her head dips down, and she rubs her hand through her hair, scrunching up a handful of it.
“Not for sex. I’m just too spent.”
“I didn’t mean for sex.”
Her eyes rise to meet mine. “Alright.”
I walk toward her, and she comes into my arms. “Thank you.”
She nods against me.
“Now, let me feed you. You can watch me cook. Then we’ll turn in early.”
“That sounds perfect.”
I kiss the top of her head, lace my fingers in hers, and pull her behind me toward the kitchen. “Tacos make everything better.”
She laughs, and I finally feel my body ease.
By nine, we’re curled under the cool sheets of my bed. My sheets may not be quite as silky as hotel sheets, but they’re not too shabby.
“It’s nice and dark in here,” Raven murmurs against my shoulder.
“Blackout shades.”
“I think I could sleep for a week.”
“Yeah, I feel ya. Guess what?”
“Hmm? I’m stumped.”
“We can sleep in tomorrow. We don’t have to go to work.”
Ouch! Raven jabs me in the ribs. “Not funny!”
“You have to admit, it sort of is.”
“Funny, not funny.”
“Goodnight, babe.”
“Goodnight, Bryce.” She snuggles down, and I feel the silk of her hair slide over my arm. It’s a feeling I could definitely get used to.
27
Chapter 27
I have no clothes.
I spy one of Bryce’s t-shirts hanging on the back of a chair in the bedroom. I inhale his scent as I pull it over my head.
I love his scent—my kryptonite.
After a quick stop in the bathroom, I thank the good lord I had a toothbrush in my bag.
“Morning,” I call as I approach the man of the house in the kitchen. He’s hard at work trying to dig something out of the toaster.
“Lose something?”
“My mind.”
“I don’t think you’ll find it in there.”
He chuckles, sets the toaster aside, and looks at me with a hungry gaze. Uh oh.
“No sex,” I remind him.
He snakes out a hand and tugs at the hem of his shirt. “Then you probably shouldn’t be walking around like that.”
“I have no clothes.”
“Even better.”
I swat his hand away as he latches onto the shirt. “Nuh-uh.”
Bryce sticks out his bottom lip, then winces. “Ouch, that still hurts.”
“See, you couldn’t have sex anyway.”
“Because of my lip?”
“Yep.”
He chuckles. “I have lots of other tools.”
I feel the blush start at my nipples and creep upward.
“Seriously, no sex. I think sex has gotten us in enough troub
le already.”
“Good point,” he admits as he crosses his arms over his beautiful bare chest.
“Will you take me to my car?”
His brows knit together. “Now?”
“Soon.”
“Of course, but we should have breakfast first.”
The offer is too good to turn down. I’m famished. “Deal.”
I can’t go out of Bryce’s house wearing his shirt, or his clothes at all, for that matter. I pull on my county-issued swimsuit, t-shirt, and swim trunks, praying I don’t run into any of the Archers.
We hustle to the truck incident-free.
Bryce is silent as he drives me back to the station house.
Curiosity spurs me to ask, “What’s wrong? Besides the obvious.”
He glances at me. “I don’t want you to live with Jeremy.”
My head snaps to face him. “What?”
“You heard me clear as can be. I don’t want you to live with Jeremy.”
“Well, I don’t have anywhere to go right now, and I don’t have any money coming in. I’m going to run out of money soon as is. Thank heavens he’s letting me stay free for the next couple months while his roommate is gone.”
A muscle pops out on Bryce’s jaw as he works his teeth together.
“You can be mad all you like. I don’t care, honestly.”
“I’ll give you money.”
“You will not. That’s insulting.”
His voice turns hard when he says, “But he can give you a free place to live?” Bryce pulls in and parks, jamming on the breaks a little too hard. “Stay with me.”
I gasp, “No way. That’s like moving into the snake pit.”
The instant the words leave my mouth, I realize I’ve practically slapped him in the face. “Your family is not going to welcome me there.”
“That’s not true.”
“I’m going home to my apartment. I need the space, and I’ve got a lot to think about.”
He doesn’t say a word. He just stares out the front window with his hands clenched hard on the wheel.
“I’ll call,” I say as I slide from his truck, keys in hand.
His eyes are a dark, stormy blue when he turns them on me. “Be safe, Raven. Remember what I said about Jeremy.”