by Kinley Cole
Table of Contents
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
EPILOGUE
Copyright © 2018 by Kinley Cole
All rights reserved.
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This is a work of fiction. All characters, names, places, and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to locales, events, or actual persons—living or dead—is purely coincidental.
Table of Contents
Copyright Page
CHAPTER ONE | LEAH
CHAPTER TWO | JASON
CHAPTER THREE | LEAH
CHAPTER FOUR | JASON
CHAPTER FIVE | LEAH
CHAPTER SIX | JASON
CHAPTER SEVEN | LEAH
CHAPTER EIGHT | JASON
CHAPTER NINE | LEAH
EPILOGUE | JASON
CHAPTER ONE
LEAH
My life was right on track. Dream job; check. Loving fiancé; check. Beautiful son; check.
The only problem was that my promotion came at a time when that fiancé was too busy loving someone else, and that son of mine was wailing like a banshee wondering why in the hell we were standing outside the door of an apartment he didn’t recognize as home.
Well, that makes two of us, buddy. Because I wasn’t sure how we’d come to be here, renting this apartment, despising everyone I came across, and wishing I could figure out where I went wrong.
Maybe I never would know. Maybe I was destined to question myself from here on out, knowing full well that, even though I didn’t know what it was, there was something I hadn’t done right, and that something had pushed away my husband to be, my high school sweetheart who’d held my heart for more than a decade. And whatever it was, it’d pushed him right into the arms of another woman.
“Come on, buddy. It’s okay, let’s get inside so I can get the rest of our boxes.”
Luxe looked up at me with red rimming his eyes and confusion blanketing his face. It killed me that this would become the new normal for him, for us. Wiggling the key in the knob and giving a shove to the door, it finally opened. In the entryway we stood, both of us scanning the new place. Empty, white walls, beige carpet. There was nothing truly homey about this place, but we would make do.
“Where’s Daddy?” Luxe’s voice shook as he stepped in before me, walking around the empty living area with a sense of apprehensive wonder. A smile finally crossed his face, momentarily distracted by the newness. If only I could have that childlike sense of wonder again.
“He’s working, sweetie. He’ll come later to pick you up, though.” I walked down the narrow hallway to Luxe’s room and set the box down, sliding my key across the tape to open it up. “Here you go!” I hollered, peeking out from his door. “You play in here while Mommy gets the rest of our stuff, okay?”
“Okay!” He toddled down the hallway toward me in his big fluffy coat. Laughter escaped me at the sight. Through all the darkness and sadness I’ve endured lately, he’s my light and happiness. Tears pooled in my eyes as my emotions got the best of me.
I quickly left his room so he wouldn’t see me cry, leaning my back against the wall as though it might help me hold myself together somehow, if only for a moment. The tears crept their way down my cheeks yet again, but I wiped them away and pulled my shit together. I had to, not just for Luxe, but for myself, too.
Making my way down the lengthy staircase and out to my car, I opened the trunk and instantly changed my mind. There was no way I’d be able to get the heavier boxes up all those stairs on my own. I grabbed a couple I knew I could handle and slammed the trunk closed. Zach would have to deal with them for me when he came to pick up his son. It was his fault we were here, anyway.
“Vroom! Whoosh!” I peeked into Luxe’s room and he was playing with his favorite toy airplane that his dad had got him during one of his business trips.
The thought of him being with another woman during those trips caused acid to rise in my throat. He swore to me those trips were necessary for him to work his way up in the company, and I’d foolishly believed him.
There you go again, I thought to myself. Thinking about him, instead of focusing on what matters. Luxe. Yourself. And whatever kind of life this is that we’re building.
It wasn’t easy to let go of what Zach had done to me—to our family—and I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to. Right now, I knew I wasn’t capable of it. There was no room for forgiveness in my heart; it was too full of resentment.
And humiliation.
I’d heard about these things happening—men getting bored with their comfortable, routine family lives and finding someone more interesting on the side. Hell, over a year ago, I’d even been conscious enough of the change in our relationship to ask him about it. There’d been a distance there that I’d never noticed before, and Zach had started staying later at the office, going on more business trips, and focusing more on his work than the family waiting for him at home.
Paranoid. That’s what he’d called me. It’d irked me then, and it irked me even more now. He’d assured me there was no reason for me to worry about us, that we were fine. But, I guess that was easy to say when he had his blonde bombshell of a coworker keeping him company during all those late-night hours at the office.
The worst part? Everything probably would have continued on just as it was if he hadn’t had the audacity to confess to the affair in the same measured voice one would use to admit they’d accidentally killed a fucking houseplant. I’d have remained on the same blind pathway, ignoring the signs and pretending everything would be okay, and he’d have continued to fuck Tiffany, or Tamara, or whatever the hell her name was.
But Zach confessed his year-long sin to me, and then chose that sin over Luxe and me.
Which led me here. In this very nice, overly modern, two-bedroom apartment, with a confused toddler and shattered heart. The scent of new paint and cleaning chemicals was strong, and despite the chilly weather outside, I opened one of the kitchen windows a crack to air out the room.
I pried open the cardboard box I’d slid onto the counter and sighed. There wasn’t even enough household items in it to make a meal. To hell with it, I’ll go grab one more box. I’d packed them myself, so I knew the one I wanted.
“I’ll be right back, Luxe! Just going back out to the car for a quick second.” From the end of the hallway, I saw he hadn’t even looked up at the sound of my voice, too enthralled with his toy to pay me any mind. Good, at least one of us was content.
I left the apartment again, locking the door behind me even though I’d only be a minute. On the way toward the flight of seven stairs, I saw the silver nameplate on the door of the apartment closest to mine.
J. Nightingale.
Inwardly, I cringed. I really hoped not to have some crotchety old neighbor to deal with, but I wasn’t really in the position to negotiate. I’d needed an apartment, and this one was available on short notice in a decent part of the city, with enough room for Luxe to be comfortable and have the space he needed to be a kid.
I made it out to my car and back into the building in record time. Making my way up the stairs with the box full of kitchen supplies, I tripped, unfamiliar with the stai
rcase, and fell flat on my stomach. Everything from the box spilled out and scattered everywhere.
“Jesus, are you okay?”
I hadn’t even seen him until he spoke, much too engrossed in my own humiliation and utter disbelief at the moment. Then, when I raised my gaze and saw the tall, dark-haired man staring at me with concerned, piercing blue eyes, I was more embarrassed than I’d ever been in my life.
Which sparked anger within me, justified or not.
“I’m fine.” I looked away, unable to meet his eyes again as I scrambled to pick up the box’s contents from the stairs and floor.
He ducked down onto one knee, not caring about the dirt or mud on the floor, and helped put things back into the box. “That was a nasty fall though—”
“I said I’m fine.” I pushed his hand away, heat flaming in my cheeks.
I didn’t see the expression he wore, but I heard the shift in his voice. “I was just—”
“You were just interjecting yourself in something that doesn’t concern you. I said I’m fine,” I snapped, throwing the last of the items into the box. “But thanks.”
I rose to my feet, catching only a fleeting glimpse of his face. Very attractive, very confused, and...
Hurt.
Damn it, I thought to myself. The rational part of me knew he’d only been trying to help, but the humiliated part was bigger, and much louder at the moment. It occurred to me to wonder if that was the new me—angry, crass, and standoffish. Or, maybe that’s just what was left of the old me. The me I’d been with Zach.
Either way, that version of me was dead, leaving only the smoldering fury inside me. And judging by the way I’d just lashed out at an innocent bystander, that smoldering fire was bound to ignite eventually, and when it did... Well, I wasn’t sure I wanted to find out.
CHAPTER TWO
JASON
Opening the door to my apartment, I walked in and tossed my keys into the bowl on the table near the entryway. I unlaced my boots, kicking them off into the pile with my other boots—just one more thing in my life that needed organized. I thought back on the incident that had just happened in the hallway. All I’d tried to do was help the woman out, and she’d been a raging bitch about it.
But, she’d been a beautiful raging bitch about it.
I’d probably have spat out something just as vicious to match her anger, but I’d been a bit too stunned by her pretty little blue eyes that stared back at me. And that fiery red hair—well, that explained the temper.
I couldn’t lie, the feistiness in her turned me on, and because of it, I was bound and determined to get to know her.
Shuffling into the kitchen, I pulled out the bag of coffee and scooped some of the magical grounds into a coffee filter while I peered out the kitchen window. Snow was falling, and it reminded me of the fact I’d be out of work for the next couple months.
Seasonal work was like that, and I’d like to think I’d gotten used to it, but the fact the dreaded winter temperatures had come almost a full month earlier than expected wasn’t a big help to my pocketbook. I would need to find something part-time to get me through the winter, not just for money, but for sanity as well.
But what the hell would I do? I was my own boss, so working for someone else wasn’t something I wanted to do. Nor was I very good at it, to be honest. The only person I wanted to answer to was myself.
The aroma of coffee filled the air. I grabbed my favorite football mug from the cabinet and paused at the sight of the floral mug tucked in the back, with Destiny’s name printed on it in script.
How the hell had I not gotten rid of this? Why was I just seeing this now? How was it that something so simple and meaningless could cause so much pain to fill my chest? The hurt I’d been hiding and shoving away for months now resurfaced, all thanks to a stupid goddamn mug with her name on it.
Three years of a serious relationship were flushed down the drain as soon as Destiny denied my proposal and broke things off with me immediately afterward. As if the rejection wasn’t bad enough—and that’s not an easy thing for a man to get over—and though it still hurt like a bitch, I had to admit that part of me was thankful she did it. She wasn’t the one for me, even though I’d thought she was at the time. It took being away from her and out of her clutches to realize that, I guess.
I took a sip of the hot black liquid and savored the bitter flavor, attempting to shake the thoughts of my failed relationship away. I couldn’t. I was alone in this place with no one to distract me, and no work to keep my mind busy.
My life should have been vastly different at twenty-nine years old. I should have been married and had a family started, living in our own home.
Jesus, pull yourself together. Staying inside was the last thing I needed to be doing. I needed to get out, get some fresh air. I needed to clear my head.
I finished my coffee, then laced up my boots and headed out the door. Just beyond it, though, a melodic voice singing a lullaby escaped beneath the neighbor girl’s door.
She’s got a kid, I realized. Which meant she was undoubtedly with someone already. I didn’t remember seeing a ring on her finger, but she’d moved so hastily during our short conversation that I couldn’t be sure.
I stood outside her door, and it took a moment to realize I’d been mesmerized by her soft singing. My eyes scanned the silver nameplate where her name should be, but it was still bare.
I didn’t even know this woman’s name, and yet here I was, halted in my tracks because of her. Running my fingers through my coal black hair, a sigh passed my lips and I shook my head in disbelief at the power this woman already had over me.
I’D ALWAYS BEEN A MORNING person. Always enjoyed getting up at the same time the sun was just starting to peek out over the treetops and bask the world in golden hues and lengthy shadows. That’s where the quietness hid, in those early hours when the rest of the world slept, only to be jolted awake by blaring alarm clocks an hour or two later.
I’d never needed an alarm to wake me, and I didn’t wake up grumbling because of the things I had to get done during daylight hours.
What I woke up grumbling about was the fact I had little planned for the day, and today was a day that seemed to fit the bill. I was a doer, a man who preferred to work with his hands, get things done, and I didn’t mind getting a little dirty to accomplish it.
No matter the context.
Mornings like this, though? With no plans, no work, and nothing to bide my time? I didn’t do very well without some kind of goal, and laziness wasn’t exactly a cloth I was made of.
But a man could only clean and do small jobs around his own apartment for so long. It’d only been a week or so since I’d wrapped up my landscaping jobs for the winter, but I wasn’t kidding...there wasn’t a leaking faucet or squeaking hinge to be found in my place. The apartment was small, neat, and maintained. Nothing fancy, but it was mine.
It was the one thing no one could take from me. Because, evidently, winter could take my job, even it was just temporarily, and Destiny could take my pride.
Two coffees, a big breakfast of bacon and eggs, and one long, hot shower later, I knew I had to do something. Anything. Before I went absolutely mad with the boredom. It occurred to me to make my way into the hallway and knock on my new neighbor’s door, offering to help her unpack or carry boxes or something. If she didn’t want me to talk while I did it, fine. I could be the brawn she needed. Purely because I needed a task, and she obviously needed a friend.
Friend.
Right.
If yesterday’s interaction was any indication, friendship was the last thing that pretty little redhead was interested in.
Good thing I had enough interest for the both of us.
If I turned the radio off and strained my hearing a bit, I was convinced I could hear the odd high-pitched laugh or innocent babbling of the neighbor’s child through the living room wall that divided our apartments. Suddenly, very clearly, I heard a familiar voice speak, just as
exasperated as she’d been the day before.
“Luxe, please get over here and put your coat on so we can go for a car ride to the store!”
They were leaving. Which means...
I dove for the entryway of my apartment, shoving my feet into my boots clumsily. In my haste, I couldn’t even get my own arm into my jacket on the first attempt. “Shit,” I hissed under my breath.
Plucking the keys from the bowl on the entryway table, I stopped to listen. Nothing. So, they weren’t in the hallway yet.
Act calm, act normal, I chanted silently. I didn’t know why it was so damn important to me to meet her again under the ruse that it was by chance, but I didn’t want her to know I’d been listening in, either. The last thing I needed was to spook her.
I heard the apartment door open from the hallway, and I took a deep breath.
Show time. One, two...three.
I swung my apartment door open and sauntered out as though I had all the time in the world to get wherever I was going. The first thing I noticed, just like yesterday, was her eyes, made up with mascara that only accentuated the blue depths of them. The second thing was that they were trained on me, unblinking, like I’d caught her in some unthinkable act.
“Oh, hey,” I offered. But I couldn’t seem to move either, trapped under the intensity of her gaze, and the door of my apartment remained open, my hand still on the doorknob.
“Uh...” A deep crimson blush crept into her cheeks, and she pushed her son gently behind her legs, shielding him from me. “Hey.”
God, she was gorgeous. Without even fucking trying. But she may as well have reached through my chest and ripped my heart from it, the way she hid that curly-haired boy from me. “Get all moved in?” I finally asked, realizing I was staring.
“Oh.” She waved a hand after pulling her apartment door shut and locking it. “Not really. I—”
Her gaze flitted over at my own door, and I closed it. “Well, hey, anyway,” I said awkwardly, not wanting to come right out and offer to help her immediately. “I thought you must’ve been the new tenant in 3B. I’m Jason.”