by Ivy Fox
“If you’ll follow me, that is,” he says again, giving me a choice. I can either go back home now and forget he ever brought me here, or I can be brave enough to see how Gabriel is willing to help me obtain my soul’s desire.
“Freedom?” I ask, seeing his whiskey-brown eyes glow brighter with the word on my lips. He nods and tilts his head down for me to take the first step. I know he won’t force me, but I have a feeling he’s trying to show me a way to fight off my demons. It’s written all over his face, how he wishes for nothing more but to put my trust in him and follow him down this rabbit hole.
“Ladies first,” Gabriel goads, and it’s the first time he’s come close to teasing me in such a light manner.
“Oh, now you remember your manners. Thanks, but no thanks. After you,” I tease back nervously, waving my hand for him to do the honors.
The easy smirk which lights his face is terribly addictive, and I could definitely see me getting used to this side of him. Gabriel steps down the hole, and I see he’s stepped onto an iron ladder. True to my word, I follow him into the ground, praying I’m doing the right thing. With each step further down I take, I smell, oddly enough, some sort of Lysol, as if, whatever this place is, has been cleaned recently. I hear Gabriel jump off the last step, and then suddenly I feel his grip on my waist, effortlessly lifting me off the ladder and onto the smooth cement floor. The only light there is down here is coming from the open hatch above us. Gabriel turns his back to me, and from under his shoulder, I see him opening up a panel inside the wall and he flips a few switches.
And then there was light, revealing exactly what Gabriel had in mind. The room is twice as large as the house we are currently living in. It looks like it must have been a bunker of sorts, but now it’s strategically designed for another purpose altogether.
“So this is where you guys go off to,” I say in wonderment, taking it all in. This huge room is full of the most up-to-date equipment you can get in any gym. From weights, to fixed bikes for cycling, to boxing bags with an actual boxing ring in the center, for hand-to-hand combat. I mean, it’s as if I’ve stepped into a customized gym. If that wasn’t impressive enough, as I follow Gabriel around the secluded area, the minute he opens a hidden chamber behind a mirror, I find myself more in awe than ever before.
“It’s a shooting range,” I say, eagerly soaking in the view. It’s set on the far right of the room and looks like something you would see in a cop movie, complete with paper silhouettes targets with a big bull’s eye in the middle.
“Is this why you brought me here? To teach me how to shoot a gun?” I ask, bewildered.
“Gun, knife, throwing star, whatever gets the job done,” he states, moving again away from me and opening another locked storage area. I follow behind him, and the amount of guns, ammo, and all sorts of artillery I find is dumbfounding.
“This is a lot to take in,” I hush, moving through the storage unit and lightly touching every weapon on display.
“You can handle it,” he remarks with conviction in his tone. That small belief that I am more than brave enough to be in such an intimidating room makes me feel stronger. So this is what he meant by offering me freedom. He wants to make sure I can defend myself against any obstacle or threat. Never to have what happened to me be repeated without a good fight from my part. I turn to face him head on, and I see that, even though I have been too engrossed by these new surroundings, Gabriel’s attention has never strayed away from me once.
“So when do we start?” I ask, confident in my decision to follow Gabriel’s tutoring and anxious to start to learn how to defend myself and my baby from anything that dares to threaten us again. The easygoing, pleased beam in his eyes makes its glorious appearance yet again, and it only amps my resolve that I’m making the right decision.
“Now.”
I fall onto the porch step, feeling an adrenaline rush like nothing I’ve ever experienced before. Spending the last three hours with Gabriel underground, learning to shoot, throw a knife, and use my fists to hit any target was exhilarating. My blood is still boiling in my veins, wanting nothing more than to repeat this experience over and over again. I almost wish I didn’t have to go into work this afternoon, just so I could continue to learn everything Gabriel can teach me. But I know I’ll have time, and going to George’s is no less empowering. Two different changes in my life that are sure to get me closer to the woman I want to become. I have Michael to thank for the financial stability, and now Gabriel for giving me ways to feel strong and brave in my own skin. Gabriel sits by my side on the stoop, and there is no denying how pleased he is with himself.
“Can we do that again tomorrow when I get back from work?” I ask eagerly, not wanting to delay our training sessions.
“If you wish,” he says, lowering his face to the ground, but I see a satisfied smile tug on the side of his lips.
“Good. I want to practice as much as I can, before I get too big,” I explain, and place my hand over my abdomen. I’ve been doing that a lot lately, even though there really is nothing to feel yet. My stomach is just as flat today as it was a month ago. But every now and then, my first reaction is to touch my stomach whenever I refer to the little one inside.
“Hmm,” he hums out, maybe only realizing now that this training has a certain expiration date to it.
“Did you build it yourself?” I ask, trying to deflect where his worried thoughts are taking him. I don’t want anything to spoil my current mood, and Gabriel’s concern over my well-being will definitely put a grey cloud over the whole afternoon. I want to keep feeling this new-found strength run through my bloodstream as long as possible, and Gabriel worrying about me will dampen it.
“No. Cam’s pa did. Him being ex-military and all, I guess he missed having a place where he could train, and shoot shit,” he replies, looking at anything but me. He leans back and places both hands behind him on the floor. His head also tilts back, lids shut to enjoy the warm May sun on his tanned face. Having him so relaxed next to me, gives me a sudden urge to trace my finger on the scar he wears on his brow. But I cower instead, and mimic his stance, placing my own hands behind my back for support and just enjoy the spring sun on my face.
“It seems to me that he has enough artillery to equip a whole troop. He must miss it,” I input, thinking how a man who took the time to build and care for such a man cave, must be going mad without it.
“I’m sure he’s got something of his own now. Doubt even retirement in Florida could settle him any,” he answers.
“Sounds like you two were close,” I say, trying my best to mask my curiosity by not asking too many questions. Gabriel is even more closed off with his past than I am. Not knowing mine is my reason for not divulging it, but his reason, though, is still a mystery to me.
“Cam’s folks took me in when I needed it, so I guess you can say we were close.”
“Thought they moved to Florida a few years ago,” I state, wondering when Gabriel moved into this house, but neither does he acknowledge my intrusiveness or my question. Thinking better of not scaring the bear next to me, I try a different approach instead.
“All you three are pretty tight, huh?”
He nods this time, but his lids are still as closed, as before. I wish I could look into his eyes instead of the side masculine view he’s giving me now. Those supple brown eyes carry so much weight in them—so much truth. Still, no words are spoken, leaving me to wonder what his truth really is.
I know that what he did for me today took him out of his comfort zone. Every time he showed me a new move, or taught me how to hold a gun and aim at my target, with his hands guiding mine, must have taken a monumentous effort on his part. Sure, he has Cam and Michael, but Gabriel has always struck me as the lone wolf in their pack, averse to touch and conversation. With Michael being the alpha and leader, and Cam being the feisty pup who melts your heart with his playful antics, Gabriel sticks out as more of a loner compared to his two best friends. I identify with his
reluctance to attachment, as well as the incapability to see it through when we most desire the very opposite. Everyone needs human touch every once in a while. A life without it is not much of one. We all need to feel cared for, appreciated, even loved. The concept is so beyond my reach, yet I feel it in my bones that Gabriel is one of those people who surely deserves to feel these things, yet he builds up a barrier preventing these emotions from touching him in any way.
I look behind me and see that my right hand is centimeters away from his—so close I feel the heat bouncing off his skin, emanating a warmth hot enough to reach mine. Such a small distance between us, and yet the barrier is still there. I could just lean in a bit closer and put my hand over his, and feel this warm, blazing sun run through my fingers. To caress his skin and show him, in this small gesture, how much I appreciate what he did for me this morning. How could I have ever doubted his intentions? It’s absurd how I could ever have felt such a small panic when he first showed me the hatch hidden in the backyard. How could I have ever conceived any notion that this man would have an evil thought toward me or my well-being, when in reality he took the time to think of a way to help me overcome my own sense of insecurity? He said he wanted to give me freedom, but what he gave me was so much more than that. He gave me the tools to feel empowered—strong and fearless. For those reasons alone, Gabriel is climbing his way up my own fabricated walls.
Still in a daze, I look up from our almost-joined hands to appraise his side profile, only to discover his face inches from mine, looking me dead in the eye with such fire and need, I have to swallow dryly to keep me from gasping. If before it would have just taken a few inches to feel his hand beneath mine, then now all I really need to do is lean forward and place my lips on his to stop my beating heart. I see his Adam’s apple bob away, and my tongue sweeps my lower lip to try and get some moisture back into it. Only this time, I fix on his stare and see it traveling along with the movement of my tongue, as if wanting to have a taste of his own. Too quickly, he stands up, moving away from me hurriedly, away from my feverish desire to let him taste anything he wishes. The silence between us is deafening as the seconds pass and neither of us makes the first move to recover from what I think was to be my first kiss with the man who protects me even in my sleep.
Frustrated with our silence, Gabriel starts to march away from me, heading for his Harley, undoubtedly looking for the escape he must ache to find. I stand up immediately and run behind him.
“Gabriel,” I yell out, and he stops in front of me but refuses to turn and face me—but this doesn’t dismay me in the least. I try to wrap my arms around his waist and cradle my face at his back, feeling his cool black vest against my cheek, wishing it wasn’t such a thick barrier between us, hating how there is always something that stops me from getting closer to him. I inhale his smell of rich oil, fire, and smoke and commit it to memory, not knowing when he’ll let me get this close to him again.
“Thank you,” I hush out, hoping those two words are enough for him to understand what today meant to me. What the past six weeks of his constant care has meant to me. Two words can never convey how grateful I am, still, they are the only ones I can offer him. His stiff posture relaxes and I hear him release a sigh. I smile inwardly, content he heard my words and understood their meaning. Without turning around, he lowers his head and lifts my hand to the lips I had wanted on mine not two minutes ago. He kisses my inner wrist so affectionately, I’m thankful my other arm is clinging onto his frame for support, or I fear my wobbly knees would fail me.
Although he whispers it into my palm as he delivers yet another sweet delicate kiss, I hear every word and engrave it somewhere deep inside where no monsters could ever touch such treasured words.
“Always, little bird.”
Chapter 17
Hope
“Heard a rumor I might find you here,” I hear a familiar female voice singsong behind my ear as I place two plates on the checkered table in front of two very hungry bank clerks. I turn around and see a beaming Aurora, a pleased smile decorating her face.
“You look good, hun. Glad to see you up and about, taking charge of things.”
“Thought it was about time. Not much to do back at the house.”
“You sure? I can think about a thing or two my boys could entertain you with,” she jests in the same melodic tone.
I briskly turn my back to her and head for the counter before she’s able to see for herself the red tinge on my cheeks brought on by such a comment. When I feel that my traitorous face won’t betray me, I turn back and ask her if she wants something.
“Coffee will be fine. Just waiting on someone.”
“Oh yeah? A male someone, maybe?” I dish out, wondering if she enjoys the same light teasing she is so fond of bestowing on me.
“Only my kid brother. Don’t have any time for another type of man in my life. Got enough testosterone in it as it is,” she replies, sitting on one of the stools.
“Won’t argue with that,” I affirm, getting the pot of coffee to fill her mug. Mabel is at the other end of the counter, gossiping with some church-looking ladies closer to her age, even though the giggling coming from the group feels like it’s a cheerleading gathering instead. She has grown on me, though, and as the days pass, I think her curiosity about learning where I came from and my relationship with the Archangel men has simmered down a bit. Of course, there is the odd question here and there, but I established that Mabel is harmless in her curiosity. She’s just a fan of some good old-fashioned gossip, as per the example of what she’s doing now with her little clique.
Aurora, though, not so much. The hard-ass woman sipping coffee and giving the once over is as smart as they come, and can probably smell bullshit a mile away. So even though I have come to love our talks, anything pertaining to ‘her’ so-called boys, I try and keep to myself.
“Have to say, I never thought I’d see Uri come here for his morning coffee,” I confess. The few times the man has come to the house, his demeanor has been anything less than welcoming. He might have told the guys that the best thing for me was to stay at their place in the beginning, but I doubt very much that he thought my stay there should be prolonged as long as it has been. Every time he drops by, his stare and coldness is too prickly not to take notice. I wonder if Michael has also picked up on it?
“Not Uri I was referring to,” Aurora interrupts.
“Oh? I didn’t realize you had more brothers,” I say, naturally surprised. Michael never mentioned another uncle.
Aurora looks to the side and grins at the uniformed officer approaching her.
“Yep, and like always, he’s right on time. Hey, Joe,” she says, hugging the man in blue. “You look thin, darling. Them free donuts don’t put meat on your bones?” she teases, and the laugh that comes out of him is just as familiar as the handsome blond biker I live with.
“You think I put that crap into my body? No way. My body is a temple, after all. You taught me that,” he smiles at his sister.
“Didn’t think you were paying attention, Lieutenant,” she goads him further.
“Yes, ma’am, I was. Lord knows you’d whoop my ass otherwise.”
“Did that just once; let it go, Joe. You deserved more than an ass-kicking for going through my room when I wasn’t around. My personal space is mine and mine alone, and don’t you forget it,” she continues, but I see the underlying threat there.
“Wouldn’t dream of pissing off the infamous Aurora,” he smirks warmly.
“Good. Now sit your ass down and let me introduce you to a friend of mine,” she says as she turns to me. Suddenly, I feel like I want to run away as fast as my legs can allow, and not look back even if my life depends on it. It’s an unsettling feeling, and I have no idea why it has even sprung up on me with such intensity that it feels like it’s going to rob me of oxygen.
“Hope, hun, you okay? You’re looking pale all of a sudden,” Aurora asks, rising from her seat and walking back behind th
e counter like she owns the place. I feel my blood drain from my face, and apparently Aurora is quick to pick up on it.
“I’m fine,” I tell her. “Just a little lightheaded.”
“You should sit down. Remember what I told you? You have high blood pressure, and anytime you feel off, you need to sit down and call me immediately. Here, drink this water,” she says while pulling me away from my protective counter and placing me right next to the man who is making me feel edgier by the minute. The wide berth I prefer to have given him is no longer possible, with Aurora on her warpath making sure my health is up to par.
“Should I call an ambulance?” Joe asks, concern marring his face. The same face that looks terribly like his nephew. I try to focus on Michael and how he would, without a doubt, insist on me quitting this job if he found out I felt ill in anyway. I drink the glass of sugar water Aurora gives me and count to ten. As each number decreases in value, I remind myself that I am safe and this unnerving feeling is just an illogical reaction to a stranger I know nothing about. He’s Michael’s and Aurora’s family, and aside from Uri’s chilly glances toward me every so often, they have been nothing but a saving grace to me. This stranger can’t be all bad if he grew up with the same values and principles. So why do I feel the urge to run and hide from him?
“No need for an ambulance. I’m fine. Really,” I exclaim while Aurora puts two fingers on my wrist to feel my heart rate and pulls down on my upper cheek slightly to look deep into my eyes.
“Aurora, really, I’m fine,” I tell her again, this time showcasing my annoyed look at her constant hovering.
“Well, you do look like you’re getting your color back. Still, I’d like to see you back at the house for a quick check-up. Better yet, I’ll ask George to drive you over this afternoon to the hospital so I can get a better look,” she says, confident in her strategy.