by Sam Crescent
Mandy shook her head. “No, it can’t be.”
“It does if you’ve been having unprotected sex.”
“I haven’t.”
“You sure?” Doc asked.
“I … I don’t know.” Mandy couldn’t remember. Each time she’d been with Dale, she’d been out of her mind with pleasure, just wanting him inside her.
“I will go and get the test,” Doc said. “Stay here. Jo, keep an eye on her.”
“Will do.”
Mandy sat down on the sofa. She couldn’t believe this. “There’s no way I’m pregnant.”
“If you are, is Dale the father?”
“Yes, of course he is. I haven’t been seeing anyone else. This … I’m in shock. I think I’m in shock, and I’m scared.” She had never been so scared in all of her life. How could this be happening? She knew how it happened, but she was usually so careful. She’d told Dale about the protection thing. He didn’t need constant reminding. It was what he’d said to her months ago.
Shit, had he forgotten? She’d been so blown away by the pleasure she’d not even thought to ask.
Tears filled her eyes.
“Don’t panic, Mandy. I’m right here.” Jo sat beside her.
“I’m not ready to be a mother.” She took several deep breaths, feeling the panic wash over her. She had to get her bearings. There was no way she was pregnant. She couldn’t be.
Dale would have told her if a condom broke.
****
Dale was working on his bike when he was pulled up, and suddenly flat on his back again after getting a punch in the face.
“Get the fuck up,” Doc said.
“Dad, what the fuck!”
“Get the fuck up.”
Dale frowned. “I’ll stay down here.”
“I raised a man, not a fucking asshole. You get up right now and you tell me it’s not true.”
“What’s not true?”
“Tell me you didn’t figure you’d keep Mandy by trying to secretly knock her up. Tell me I raised a better boy than that.”
Dale felt all of the color wash out of his face. Now he felt sick. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Here’s the thing, Dale, I know when you’re lying.” Doc dragged him to his feet, and Dale stared at the man who was not only his father but also his club president.
No one was around to witness their argument.
“You did it, didn’t you?” Doc asked.
Dale was silent. Blood filled his mouth, and he spat onto the floor in an attempt to clean it out. He could lie, but it wouldn’t do him any good.
“Where’s Mandy?”
“She’s back at the garage, waiting for me to bring back a pregnancy test. You knocked her up without even consulting her? Without even asking her? Who the fuck are you? I didn’t raise this kind of shit.”
“How else was I going to keep her? How else was I going to make her mine?” Dale asked.
Doc burst out laughing. “By taking your time. By making her fall in love with you. Not forcing her to have your babies just so you can keep her. Mandy, you think she’s ready to have kids? She was only just ready to go on a date with you, and now she could be pregnant.”
“She might not be.”
“For the past couple of weeks, she’s been coming in late after having morning sickness. You put two and two together and tell me you haven’t realized the same thing.”
“She’s pregnant?”
“I can’t … you fucking … ugh!” Doc looked like he wanted to throttle him.
“I thought you’d be on my side.”
“I’d be on your side if she had decided to get pregnant and sabotaged the condoms to force you to be her baby daddy. This, you’ve forced Mandy.”
“She was with me every single step of the way. I didn’t rape her.”
“But you forced this. How is this any better?” he asked. “Mandy didn’t get a choice. I thought I taught you better than that. We’re a club. We have women to use, but we also respect them. It’s their choice to fuck as many brothers as they want. I told you to always give women a choice.”
“I didn’t force her!”
“She’s fucking pregnant.”
“We don’t know that.”
“You better fix this shit, Dale. I mean it.”
Doc stormed away, and Dale knew he’d fucked up.
Chapter Six
Mandy felt sick to her stomach.
She was pregnant.
How the fuck?
She did know of course.
She and Dale had been having sex.
Staring down at the stick, she didn’t know what to do. Well, she was going to keep the baby, so she knew one thing she’d be doing, but what about everything else?
There was a knock at the door.
“Give me a minute.”
“It’s Dale.”
She closed her eyes and groaned.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. What do you want?” Could she look at him right now?
“I know, Mandy. You can’t keep me locked out.”
She ran her hands down her knees. “It’s open.”
The door opened, and there was Dale.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“What? We can’t help that we got caught.”
“We could have,” he said.
She frowned. “Dale, you’re not making any sense.”
“I know you’ve just found out we’re pregnant and all, but I did it on purpose.”
Mandy’s mouth dropped open. “This wasn’t a mistake?”
“I love you, Mandy. I want to be with you.”
“Get out.”
“Mandy, please.”
“No, I said get out. I trusted you. Please, leave me alone.” She felt tears fill her eyes, and she gritted her teeth in an attempt to keep in her frustration. “I don’t want to do this right now. You knew, and now I’m pregnant. Do you have any idea what this means?”
“We don’t have to do this alone.”
He stepped toward her, but she needed her space.
Pulling away she shook her head. “No, I don’t want you to touch me.”
“Mandy?”
“No. Please, leave me alone.”
“Please don’t push me out. I love you. I’m in love with you. Fucking crazily so, and I can’t lose you.”
“You should have thought about that before you knocked me up without my consent!” She couldn’t help but scream.
In the next second Doc and Jo were there. She watched as Doc pulled Dale from the bathroom. Seeing him go, she breathed out a sigh of relief.
“Are you okay, honey?” Jo asked, coming toward her.
Jo was heavily pregnant, just like Mandy would be so soon.
“I’m fine.”
“You’re sure.”
“I said I’m fine.” She burst into tears.
Jo didn’t go anywhere though.
“I don’t cry. I hate crying.”
“You’re fine. It’s the hormones.”
“I hate crying,” she said, repeating her words. “He did it on purpose, Jo. What am I supposed to do?” She had no idea what she could do. What she should do?
“First, you’re going to get a tissue and wipe your eyes. Keep one on hand in case of any more waterworks.”
“I don’t want to keep on crying.”
“It will happen and you’re going to hate it, but it’s fine. You don’t have to panic at all. You’re fine. Then we’ll schedule an appointment with the doctor, and we’ll take it from there. Do you want Dale to be part of this?”
Mandy put a hand across her stomach. Her first reaction was to scream no, but then she paused. “He’ll have to be. I’m so confused right now. Should I let him? No matter what happens, he’s the father.”
Jo helped her to sit down.
Seconds later Doc returned.
“Mandy, I’m so freaking sorry about all of this.”
“It’s
not your fault.”
“I thought I raised a better son.”
It was on the tip of her tongue to tell him he had, but she kept it to herself. She was pissed at Dale and wanted nothing to do with him right now. She needed to get her feelings in check.
What he’d done was … wrong, so wrong.
Why couldn’t she stop crying?
“This is weird to see,” Doc said.
“Don’t pick on me. I’m pregnant. I should be allowed some compassion.”
“You’re getting it. You have me saying you look cute and sweet, and adorable,” Doc said. “I never thought I’d be saying that about you.”
“Isn’t my husband so sweet?” Jo asked.
“Not right now he’s not. You do realize this will make you a granddad, right?”
The smile on Doc’s face dropped.
“Yeah, while you’re going to have little kids running around, there’s going to be another calling you Grandpa.”
Jo burst out laughing.
“How can you be friends with this woman?”
“I love her,” Jo said, wrapping her arms around Mandy and holding her close. “Whatever you decide, we will be here for you. You don’t want Dale around, Doc will help. You do, well, it’s your call to make.”
Would it be so bad to have Dale around?
He did do all of this.
Well, she helped do a lot of it, but he was supposed to do the condoms.
You didn’t remember.
She pushed her doubts aside.
Getting to her feet, Jo stood beside her.
“What are you doing?” Doc asked.
“I’m going to get to work.”
“I think you should go home and rest.”
“Not going to happen, biker boy. I’m going to do my job. Plenty of pregnant women are able to keep on working, and they don’t have to worry about anything bad happening. I’m going to work, and I’ll figure this out.”
“But…” Doc didn’t finish. “Okay, fine. No heavy lifting for you, and if you feel sick or anything, you call me, got it?”
“I have got it.” She put her fingers to her forehead and saluted him. “Captain Grandpa.”
Jo burst out laughing. “And you wonder why I’m friends with her. She’s so funny.”
Mandy didn’t feel funny right now. She felt so lonely and lost.
Standing behind her desk, she stared down at all the papers. Everything would be fine. She had to believe that.
****
Dale ran his fingers through his hair.
It had been a couple of days since he learned he was going to be a daddy. Well, he was struggling to keep his distance. Mandy had asked him. His own father had asked him. So, for Mandy, he’d not showed up at her house, or done anything she may feel uncomfortable with.
Now though, he stood outside the doctor’s office, waiting for the confirmation that he was indeed going to be a father. She didn’t know he was here, but he made sure to keep up to date on everything she had going on.
Leaning against the wall, he tried not to panic or feel sick.
He was going to be a dad.
Excitement flooded him but also fear. What if Mandy kept him away from his kid? No, she wouldn’t do that. He had to believe in himself, in her, and in everything else.
Time seemed to slow down as he waited for her.
Jo had come with her to the appointment. It was how he discovered what was happening.
Glancing down at the time, he saw her appointment was already twenty minutes ago.
As if answering his prayers, Jo emerged followed by Mandy.
“I’m so excited,” Jo said.
Stepping out of the shadows of the building, he approached Mandy.
“I’ll meet you back in the car,” Mandy said.
“You’re sure?”
“Yes.”
Dale waited for Jo to leave.
“Hey,” he said.
“Hey. It has been confirmed. We are pregnant.”
He stared at her, and he didn’t know what to do or say.
“Aren’t you going to say something?”
“I don’t know what to say. I’m terrified of losing you right now.”
“Why did you do it?” she asked. “I thought this was a mistake of the condom breaking or something, but you said you did it. What does that even mean?” she asked.
“It means…” He stopped to take a breath. “I wanted you. I fucked up in the beginning with you. I danced with that other woman because I was afraid.”
“Afraid?”
“Yeah. I had the most amazing date with you. You made me laugh and feel shit I’ve never felt with a woman before. It scared me. We’ve been over this already. I’m not going to keep on repeating myself. Seeing you at the club, I was a fucking idiot. I wanted to go to you, attack all of the men who dared even look at you. I’ve never felt this way about another person before in my life, Mandy. I was scared. We argued, and I fucked it up. I regret not telling you the truth.”
“What was the truth?”
“That I was in love with you from the moment you smiled at me. You’re … everything I could ever want. You don’t allow me to be a shit. You call me out on everything. I fucking love you more than anything in the world, and it scared me because you didn’t love me. You didn’t look like you couldn’t live without me. You were always in control. Always with the witty comeback. I fell in love with you, and thinking about losing you, I panicked.” He pointed at her stomach. “I know it’s not a perfect reason, but I do love you. I love you more than anything else in the world, and I will do whatever it takes to win you back, because you are my life.”
He saw she was crying.
“Please don’t cry, baby. I can’t take the tears.”
“It’s fine.” She sniffled. “So fine.”
“It’s not fine. I don’t want to make you cry. Fuck! I screw up everything, and I didn’t want to.”
She burst out laughing. “I’m sorry. It’s the hormones. I cry at everything nowadays. Even cars coming in damaged. I just burst into tears.”
“I bet that scares you,” he said.
“Oh, it does. It really does.” She sniffled. “I never thought you felt that way about me. Especially when I saw you with that girl. Wow, I can’t even believe we’re at this place, you know.” She put a hand on her stomach. “I am still mad at you.”
“Be mad at me. I’m a dick. I can’t believe I did this to you and to us.”
“But I don’t want to do this alone. You’re wrong, by the way.”
“I’m wrong?”
“I had the most amazing time with you. Seeing you with another woman, it hurt more than anything else in my life had before.” She licked her lips. “I didn’t want to get my heart broken again. Whenever you’re around, I struggle to make sound decisions. You make me forget who I am and what I’m supposed to be doing. I guess, I … I’m trying to tell you I love you. I’m not good at the whole sharing thing.”
“The tears are helping.” He stepped toward her, stroking her cheek and wiping the tears away.
“I’m still mad at you. I wasn’t ready to be pregnant.”
“I know,” he said. “I’m so sorry.”
“But I can’t get rid of this being. I don’t want to call it ‘it’. Calling it, it sounds so horrible. This thing is a living, breathing being. I love it already. I don’t know if it’s going to be a boy or girl.”
“I think we can safely call our baby ‘it’ for now.” He placed his hands on her stomach.
“I’m not showing yet. Soon, not yet.” She took a deep breath.
“I want to be there with you, for you, for our baby.”
“You can come to all the appointments. I want you there, but I need time to get used to this.”
“I love you, Mandy. I will give you everything you need. I’m so sorry.”
“I really want to stay mad at you. This is my body.”
“I know.” He pressed a kiss to her lips. “B
ut I love you more than anything else in the world. Please know that.”
She nodded. “I still need time.”
She pressed her palm against his cheek.
It wasn’t much, but it was enough.
He felt her shake, and he had to let her walk away.
Chapter Seven
One month later.
Two months later.
Three months later.
Mandy stared at the table. She’d lit some candles, and at Jo’s advice, even cooked. It wasn’t like she needed Jo’s advice, but she did need her friend to finally push her in the right direction. She didn’t want to keep being mad at Dale. He didn’t deserve that—maybe he did, but and on some level, she had to have known they weren’t being safe. It was selfish of her to make him remember everything. Besides, they were pregnant, going to have a baby, and she loved him. There was no way she could hold this against him forever. She wanted to have this baby, wanted to be with him more than anything. She loved him. So they got pregnant without a plan? Who cares? She and Dale were meant to be, and she was tired of arguing with her own feelings. This was the first step in attempting to win him back. She didn’t know how it was going to work, and she could only hope. She didn’t know if the food was any good though. Her nerves had been getting the better of her for some time.
They were going to have a baby together, and even though she didn’t exactly agree with his methods, she couldn’t hold it against him forever.
He wanted them to be a real family.
Full of love.
She wanted that, too.
She didn’t want to spend all of her life being alone, having a child ask where his father was, or why he could only do visits every other weekend.
To have this baby, she’d come to realize she wanted something like Jo and Doc. They were in love, and against all odds, she did love Dale.
Yes, he’d fucked up.
Yes, she was pissed at him.
But that didn’t mean she didn’t love him nor that she didn’t want him. Far from it.
Being away from him was a nightmare in itself.
She missed him.
Dale had kept his distance though, which was what she’d asked for. He appeared at every single doctor’s appointment, and anything else related to the baby. She knew he wanted more. She saw it in the way he looked at her, and the guilt never failed to show up.