Which was impossible.
Nobody knew what was going to happen.
And now I almost felt trapped.
A giant house. The biggest bedroom I had ever seen. A heated pool. The fucking ocean as my backyard.
And yet the word trapped went through my head more than a few times.
I could always walk away.
Whatever games Them wanted to play, I had the card that would end all the games.
Leave.
But they knew the part of my brain that wanted to write and tell stories needed to know it all. I needed to know the truth. Of Them. Of Uly and Hil as a band. Of Penelope. And I needed to know what really happened with Ash’s mother.
It was an addiction.
And even if I did want to leave…
Where would I go?
It seemed so easy, but it wasn’t.
I didn’t even have a fucking vehicle.
I was driving one of Jo’s spare cars. There was no way she was going to let me drive a six figure car off her property and just take it so I could find somewhere else to live.
My hands held the wheel as I coasted along the lighted road of the driveway, tears falling down my cheeks.
Them.
They wanted me to choose.
Choose what?
Choose one of Them?
For what?
So we could be together?
As what?
An actual relationship… or just for a few nights of wild fun…
When the driveway came to an end, I did not expect to see Lizzy and Danica waiting for me on the steps to Jo’s house.
Danica paced back and forth while Lizzy just sat there, gently swaying.
I tucked the necklace (with Penelope’s ring?) into my pocket as I got out of the car.
I approached Jo’s house and closed my eyes for a second, wishing this was all a bad dream. That I would wake up in the comfortable bed that was sort of mine and I would roll to my back and take a deep breath and smile. That dream was so fucking weird, right? Hil stealing Pres’s SUV. Hil and I in the backseat of that SUV. Principal Werthwood following me. Me breaking the window. Jo showing up. Me going to see Ash. Everything that happened with Them. And now… Lizzy and Danica waiting for me on Jo’s steps.
It was all a dream.
But it wasn’t.
I opened my eyes and they were still there.
“I’m sorry, Belle,” Danica said. “I tried to keep her home and get her to sleep.”
“You can’t imagine the night I’ve had,” I said. “I regret telling you two to leave.”
“And that’s what you should have done,” Lizzy yelled to me. “You should have left. Be gone.”
I looked at Danica.
Danica just shook her head.
“Are you mad at me, Lizzy?” I asked.
“Mad? I’m not mad anymore. It does nothing. It’s time to take action, Belle.”
Lizzy fought to get to her feet.
Danica had to stand behind her.
“What is this?” I asked. “I’m really not in the mood tonight. Okay? I don’t want to be lectured on right and wrong. Not from some rich girls.”
“Belle, you should shut the fuck up and listen,” Danica said. “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t think what Lizzy had to say was legit.”
I swallowed hard. “Okay. So what’s so legit now? Because… you know what?” I reached into my pocket and took out the necklace. “Uly gave this to me. I assume it’s Penelope’s? Of course I don’t know who that is. Why would I? I have to keep playing this stupid fucking game. And now they want me to choose. How about that? Coming after me. Making moves at me. Kissing me. Me kissing them. Touching…” My face warmed up. “Never mind. Doesn’t matter. I would love to know what’s so legit. Because not only do I have this fucking necklace but Hil stole Pres’s SUV and I threw a rock through Principal Werthwood’s SUV window.”
Both Lizzy and Danica were jaw dropped.
And we stood in silence for a few seconds.
“Yeah,” I said. “Pick your jaws up. And either come with me to get a drink. Or go home for good.”
“Just listen for a second,” Danica said.
“I’ve been trying to talk to you for a long time,” Lizzy said. She was drunk. And she was annoying. “Trying to pull you aside to tell you how to fix it all.”
“Fix it all?”
“Them,” Lizzy said. “The files, Belle. The files.”
“What the hell is she talking about?” I asked Danica.
“Lizzy, sit down,” Danica said.
Lizzy plopped down on the steps.
“It’s about the truth,” Danica said. “And Lizzy has an idea. How to get everything, Belle. All their dirty secrets. All their truths.”
I looked down at Lizzy. She looked up at me and nodded. “That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you. You want to fight back for real? You want to make Them feel the way they make everyone else feel? All the answers you want, Belle, are waiting. You’re never going to get the truth from Them. Never. You know that. I warned you to stop getting involved and you wouldn’t listen. So now… here we are…”
I looked at Danica.
She frowned.
I looked at my hand.
The necklace. The ring. The missing diamond.
I could still taste both Ash and Hil on my lips.
“This will let you leave, Belle,” Lizzy said in a calm, suddenly sober voice. “You want to go? You want to go and not feel empty? This is what you do. It’s the only way to get to Them. Or the truth.”
I turned and sat down on the step next to Lizzy.
She put her hand to mine.
I looked her in the eyes.
“Two things, Lizzy,” I whispered.
“What?” she asked.
“First, I need a cigarette.”
“Can’t help you there,” she said.
“I can help myself with that.”
“Fine,” Lizzy said. “What’s the second the thing?”
I put the necklace away, trading it for a cigarette.
I took a deep drag and shut my eyes again.
As I exhaled the smoke, I nodded.
“Tell me exactly what I need to do to end Them for good.”
Want more #bfh?
BAY FALLS HIGH continues with NOT SO Special and it’s AVAILABLE … just go to Amazon.com and type in ‘Jaxson Kidman Bay Falls High NOT SO Special’ to order your copy today!
But… here’s a little preview of the book before you order!
* * *
NOT SO Special
The hallways were quiet yet tense.
I kept looking over my shoulder, waiting to see Them.
But there was no sign of Them.
I stopped at my locker, grabbed my notebook so I could head to Miss Whitaker’s class, then took the long way there.
Tempting fate.
Tempting whatever waited to show me Them.
But there was still no sign.
I opened the door to Miss Whitaker’s room and it was bustling with a full class.
I loved how everyone just scattered wherever they wanted.
There was a couple sitting against the back wall, heads touching, both their eyes shut, sharing earbuds.
There was some guy with long hair, with his face on a desk, snoring.
Most everyone else just sat with their phones in their hands.
Only two sat with a notebook open.
And then there was Miss Whitaker, standing at the window, staring out.
I crept up on her and cleared my throat to get her attention.
She turned and smiled when she saw me.
“You okay?” I asked her.
“How much do you love that secret notebook of yours?”
“What?”
“That notebook,” she said. “You write in it. A lot. And you only choose what the world sees. What about everything else. What does it say in there, Belle?”
“Well… a hello wo
uld have been a good start… but… yeah…”
“Cut the shit,” Miss Whitaker said. “You keep handing me good stuff but hiding the great stuff.”
“You think that’s going to be great?” I asked. “Random stuff about an old boyfriend? Or where I grew up. Or how I grew up. Or… whatever else…”
“That’s the great,” Miss Whitaker said. “Because it’s raw. So give me that, Belle. Something raw.”
I looked to my left. I studied everyone. I curled my lip.
“Sharing the sound, what can they actually hear? The heartbeat that echoes, if only to chase the fear. To shut your eyes and lose all senses, discover ones not found. Fingertips that explore, we know there is ground. Up here, there are no angels, those that can be this high. One last note, look at me, my love, and let me taste your sigh….”
“That’s what you want, Belle,” Miss Whitaker said. “Why not give me something you lost?”
I looked at her.
“I trusted your touch, the seconds that climbed onto each other, we built our own time for this, running down the endless hall, laughing at the ghosts that were never really there. Leaving nothing left unknown, I can stare into your eyes and get lost, like one big contradiction for the sake of writing a fucking word that could make sense of everything that’s happened. But then there’s silence. Except for that one lonely cricket. It’s body the sound. Just like us…”
I swallowed hard and felt my cheeks burning red.
Miss Whitaker grinned. “Ten.”
“Ten?”
“I want ten pages, Belle. Ten of the best pages you’ve got. Get them on my desk and I can send them off for you. But you better go deep. Don’t fluff shit. Like these two sharing the earbuds that you just described.”
Miss Whitaker and I looked at them at the same time.
“What’s wrong with that?” I asked.
“Pity,” she said. Then she whispered, “You took half the sound, but all of my heart. I can get the smell of your clothes off my skin. I’ll hear the same song, over and over, and when it ends, I know I can make it all begin. Again, but not us, my reflections tell me the truth. So I cut my hand, to avoid the truth, and I’m already lost… without you…”
“You should be the famous one,” I said to her.
“You first, Belle,” she said.
“Ten pages?” I asked.
“Ten.”
I opened my mouth and felt my back pocket vibrate.
I gasped.
Them.
“Sorry,” I said to Miss Whitaker. “I’ve been waiting…”
I let my voice trail off.
I didn’t even have enough energy for a decent lie.
I turned and looked down at my phone.
My smile faded fast.
It wasn’t Uly, Hil, or Ash.
It was Jo.
My mother was in the hospital… again.
READY TO READ NOT SO Special? GO HERE RIGHT NOW AND LOOK FOR THE TITLE:
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#bfh… #hch… and now #bc
Darlin’ … DO NOT STOP READING YET!
You may have heard about HCH in this book or read about #hch on social media… well, that’s the rival town for Bay Falls High. And I’m inviting you RIGHT NOW to start reading Hidden Creek High! Trust me, you’re going to want to know the story of Wes & Aira (and Nova & Elijah… and more). It’s simple. How? Check this out here: bit.ly/hch1-us
*** AND NEW! ***
Due to reader DEMAND, this world is expanding even more. You’ve heard about Brooks Crest in both the #bfh and the #hch books. Now it’s time to explore what Brooks Crest really is. Through the eyes of Mac, Les, Aric, Taz, Raf, and more.
Make sure you’re following me anywhere on social media… or just search Amazon for ‘Jaxson Kidman Brooks Crest Mac’…
Also, I have a couple important things for you…
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* * *
Look for more heart wrenching, emotional upcoming novels including:
A LETTER TO DELILAH
THE WRONG SIDE
* * *
Other bestselling novels by Jaxson include:
5 Years Later
Somebody Else (& Nobody Else)
Dear Everly,
Imagine Us
Anna’s Dress
Let You Go
When I’m Gone
What You Don’t Know
Every Other Weekend
Check out the books here:
Jaxson’s Amazon Page
* * *
PLEASE NOTE DARLIN’ - DEPENDING YOUR DEVICE, SOME OF THE LINKS ABOVE MAY NOT BE SUPPORTED. IF YOU’RE READY TO READ MORE OF MY BOOKS, JUST JUMP OVER TO AMAZON.COM AND TYPE IN JAXSON KIDMAN INTO THE SEARCH BOX AND EVERYTHING WILL SHOW UP. FEEL FREE TO EMAIL ME PERSONALLY AT [email protected] FOR ANY QUESTIONS, COMMENTS, OR EVEN MY PERSONAL SUGGESTIONS OF WHAT TO READ NEXT!
This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real locales are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. (This also includes the cover image and/or cover model(s) appearing on the cover. The context of this book does not in any way depict the personal life of said cover model(s). Image is licensed and used purely for fictional purpose only.)
First electronic edition January 2020
Copyright © 2019 by Jaxson Kidman
All rights reserved, including the right of reproduction in whole or in part of any form.
Copyright image iStock/DepositPhotos
Copyright cover Cosmic Letters
NOT SO Beautiful: a bay falls high novel Page 21