by Romilly King
"I'm fine," he managed to say. He wanted to reassure her that he was okay but all he could think of was that the clock was ticking down.
"Okay," she patted his arm and he followed her to the front door.
"Bye Ash," she called as Richard opened the door to let her out.
"See you, Maisie," Ash called from the kitchen where he was clearing up after their lunch.
#
Falling in love with an Emptor wasn't banned. Not that Richard was in love. Delphic hadn't warned him against it but it wasn't encouraged and the post-contract procedures aimed to wash away any incipient feelings of attachment. The agency understood that due to the nature of a Venditor's profession it was bound to happen occasionally but they did what they could to ensure only real connections made it outside of contract.
Both Venditor and Emptor were advised to compartmentalize their lives if they wanted to avoid relationships. It was considered impolite for Venditores to ask personal questions of their Emptores and strict discretion was enforced regarding past contracts. That was a given.
There were certain procedures that the Emptor and Venditor had to follow if they wanted to pursue a relationship outside of a contract, as well as a penalty fee the Emptor paid, but that was all. So there wasn't much in the way of Richard pursuing Ash if he set his mind to it.
Except for Ash himself.
Richard realized he was still leaning against the closed front door staring into space when Ash came looking for him.
"How was your meeting?" Ash asked.
"Fine," Richard said, his voice clipped.
"Do you want an orange juice," Ash asked.
"Sure," Richard followed him to the kitchen where Ash began cramming oranges into a juicer on the counter. The noise grated on Richard's nerves but the neon orange thick pulpy juice looked wonderful. He looked down at the glass and wondered why he couldn't seem to raise it to his lips. He frowned down at it.
Ash just stood and looked at Richard whilst he drank his own juice. His silence soured Richard's mood even more and he found he could barely look at Ash, instead, he stared at his juice and resolutely sip by sip drank it down. Time, he thought, I don't have time.
"Look," Ash said when Richard finally finished the glass and put it heavily on the counter. "I've got a few things I need to focus on today, so why don't you take a break, have a day off, no sessions, and we'll pick back up tomorrow morning?"
Richard froze, "Alright," he said, blindly he grabbed the glass from the counter and hurried to the sink to wash it, anything to avoid Ash's face.
"You, uh, you okay, Ricky?"
Ricky. Again.
He nodded, not in answer but an acknowledgment of Ash's question. He turned the tap on full and vigorously washed his glass, keeping his back to Ash. When he turned back Ash was gone. Mindlessly Richard cleaned the juicer by hand to have something to do.
Chapter Thirteen
Richard would never have guessed that not being teased could be worse than being teased, but with no afternoon or evening session by bedtime he felt like he was going to explode. He had a lot of pent-up energy that he had no idea what to do with, and he felt antsy and lonely and miserable. He couldn't fall asleep, even after lying in bed for over an hour. Pacing didn't help and showering didn't help, he thought about going for a swim but that was just silly in the middle of the night.
Out of the two things that might have worked, masturbating was strictly forbidden and there was no way in hell that he was going to knock on Ash's door and ask to be held.
It was the worst he'd felt the entire time he had been at Ash's house, and as he continued to toss and turn, he started to get angry.
Was it too much to ask that Ash be predictable? That he behaves toward Richard in one way and one way alone instead of giving him conflicting signals? Hadn't Richard done everything he wanted? Ash kept saying he was good, but if he believed that, then wouldn't he have shown it somehow? Words weren't enough, and Richard needed--
He just needed, he thought, clasping a pillow to his chest and curling around it.
Why had Ash canceled their sessions? Ash hadn't seemed angry when he'd told him, which made Richard wonder if Ash had thought he was doing him a favor of some kind. He'd even said "take a break," as if Richard had needed one. But Richard didn't need a break, and he hadn't asked for one. Okay, maybe he hadn't been in the best of moods after Ms. Maisie's visit, but that was just because he was worried about how quickly things were happening and how little time they had left.
The other possibility, of course, was that Ash had done it because he hadn't wanted to deal with Richard when he was in a foul mood. The typical Emptor probably didn't want to interact with a moody Venditor when he or she was paying for someone to entertain them. Maybe Ash had just wanted to avoid him.
When Richard finally fell asleep it was fitful, dominated by dreams of Ash, his smile, his touch, the curl of his eyelashes and way the sunlight caught his eyes and made them glow. Richard was still despondent and confused when he woke up, which wasn't an excuse for what he did then, but it made the decision to rebel much easier than it would have been otherwise.
It wasn't the first time he'd woken up to find himself grinding his erection against the mattress, but it was the first time that he didn't stop as soon as he realized what he was doing. He rubbed his face into his pillow and began to thrust as images of Ash flickered in front of his eyes.
From the start of the contract, he had tried to obey Ash's orders but maybe that was the problem. Maybe he should stop trying to be good and see what being bad got him. Maybe bad attention was better than no attention, he thought hazily. An image of Ash forcing him over the bed and spanking him rose in his mind and he came with a deep groan, his hips stuttering against the bed.
He immediately felt horrible, the momentary pleasure swamped by an overwhelming shame. He quickly pushed down his boxers, wiping at the mess on his crotch with trembling hands, and stripped the sheets.
He'd gone against one of Ash's very few rules. Deliberately. He was a fucking child.
And for what? A quick orgasm that he barely remembered, even though he'd just had it? To get back at Ash somehow? To get his attention? To show him he didn't need his approval?
What was he going to tell Ash? Did he have to tell him?
Yes, of course, he did. Besides being in a legal contract, Richard wouldn't lower himself by lying or hiding it in the hopes that Ash never found out. How Ash was going to react though? He had no idea other than Ash was going to be very disappointed.
The thought was nearly crippling.
Would he yell at Richard? Refuse to let him come for the rest of the week? Decide he wasn't worth the trouble?
Richard sat down heavily on the bed, his legs feeling too weak to hold him. Would Ash cancel their contract?
No. He wouldn't. Not for something this minor.
Not for having an orgasm when the whole previous week had revolved around controlling Richard's orgasms, denying him day after day, and teasing him to the point of crying.
Fuck.
By breakfast time Richard was a wreck and he couldn't stand it anymore. "Could we go to your bedroom?" he couldn't meet Ash's eyes and he felt sick, "I need to tell you something."
Ash took a moment before he replied "Okay," he said, his voice even but deeper than normal. "We'll eat and then go. Is that alright with you?"
It wasn't, but what was Richard to do? So he nodded and sat down, shredding his toast and moving his eggs around as he waited for Ash to finish--not that Ash seemed to eat much either.
By the time they made it to the bedroom the knots in Richard's stomach were trying to climb up his throat and strangle him and the tight expression on Ash's face wasn't helping. Ash already looked angry and Richard hadn't even confessed yet.
It was now habit to close the door behind him and Richard debated undressing, but this wasn't a session, and if Ash were going to kick him out, he didn't want to be naked when it happened.
Ash folded his arms and waited, with his height and the cold look on his face he looked intimidating and unforgiving, and Richard felt sick.
Richard took a deep breath, then another before he managed to say, "I masturbated this morning," bowed his head and waited for Ash's response.
There was a brief silence, then, "And?"
"And what?" Richard asked, glancing up.
"And what else?" Ash snapped, glaring at him, the muscles in his forearms flexing noticeably.
"There's nothing else." Richard wondered if maybe Ash hadn't heard what he said. "I woke up this morning with an erection and found that I'd been rubbing against the mattress in my sleep. Rather than stopping, I kept going until I orgasmed." Now there could be no mistaking what he'd done. "I'm sorry," he added belatedly.
"Are you fucking kidding me?" Ash asked, his face darkening further.
Richard raised his chin, pride all he had left. "I realize that while masturbating isn't technically in breach of our contract, it was one of your rules, and you specifically listed orgasm control as..."
"You're serious," Ash said, and Richard could see the surprise on his face. Surprise and the beginnings of mirth.
"I'm very serious," Richard said, and the anger that had been buried under his worry started to resurface. "This isn't fucking funny, Ash, I feel really bad about letting you down."
Despite Richard's tone Ash started to smile. "I know, I know it's not funny, it's just, you walked in this morning looking like it was the end of the world and when you insisted on coming in here because of the whole 'I need to tell you something'" Ash used air quotes, "And I thought..."
Ash broke off and rubbed his face with his hands, huffing out a breath, and looking embarrassed.
"You thought what?"
"Nothing. It's nothing."
"What did you think?" Richard demanded, knowing he had no right to ask but needing to know anyway.
"It doesn't matter..."
"Tell me," Richard growled, he stepped forward and grabbed Ash's forearm, and Ash's eyebrows rose sharply.
"Let go," Ash said, his voice dangerous and low.
"Tell me."
"Let me go," Ash said enunciating every word carefully.
Richard finally realized what he was doing and yanked his hand back as if it were burnt, "God I am so sorry!"
"What the hell is wrong with you?" Ash's expression was hard, all sharp angles and shadows.
"I'm sorry," Richard said miserably, the anger was gone, leaving him hollow in its wake.
"You've been off since yesterday, did something happen?"
He looked up at Ash. "Yes," he said cautiously.
"What did Ms. Maisie say to you?" Ash asked, and it took a second for Richard to realize Ash was talking about his interview, which, yes, that had started all of this, but wasn't what had upset him to such a degree.
"It wasn't Ms. Maisie," Richard said, his arms falling against his sides, too worn down to be anything but honest.
"Wait, but then . . . what? It was me?" Ash asked, incredulous.
"Yes."
"What did I do?" Ash asked. He looked incredulous.
"You canceled our sessions!"
"Why, why is that a bad thing? You were obviously pissed off!" Ash protested, gesturing in the direction of the kitchen. "You had that meeting with Ms. Maisie, and then you came out all, 'don't talk to me.' I was trying to be nice!"
"I don't want you to be nice!" Richard said, and Ash's eyebrows shot up.
"Ricky."
"That's not . . . that's not what I meant," Richard said, holding up his hands and shaking his head.
"No?" Ash asked, and Richard had the sudden urge to take a step back. "So what did you mean?"
He stared at Ash, silent.
"What do you want, Ricky?"
You, he thought, but he didn't say it. "I don't want you to cancel our sessions."
"Because of the money?" Ash asked quietly. "Because honestly Ricky, one session a day, two, three, none? It doesn't matter to me. I will still pay the same amount of money."
"Only until you cancel our contract," Richard replied, even though it wasn't about the contract, not anymore. He still needed the money, he would continue to do so until his Father was safely ensconced in the right home, but the contract had nothing to do with his feelings.
"Why would I do that?" Ash slowly closed the distance between the two of them until there was barely any space left. It was all Richard could do not to lean into him. "You want to know why I was so mad when we came in here?" he asked, seemingly out of the blue, his breath stirring the tiny hairs at Richard's temple. "What I was thinking?"
Richard nodded jerkily.
"I thought you were going to say you wanted to leave."
He leaned back, searching Ash's expression for proof that he meant what he said, his heart pounding. It didn't necessarily mean Ash felt anything for him beyond lust. But why else would he go to the effort of reassuring him? Why else would he care?
"I don't want to leave," he said, his voice raw.
"Good," Ash said softly, he tilted Richard's chin up so he could look him in the eyes, "I mean, don't get me wrong, we're going to have a long talk about you orgasming without permission," The words were serious but the look in Ash's eyes was almost playful and Richard could feel the worry he'd been carrying around for the last day start to drain out of him. "But I'm going to keep you, Ricky. For as long as I can."
Richard shivered and gave in to the urge to be close to Ash; he wound his fingers in Ash's shirt and rested his head on his shoulder as he whispered, "Good."
Chapter Fourteen
"You have two choices," Ash said in what was quite the deja vu moment. He looked remarkably cheerful considering they were discussing Richard's new punishment.
That was probably why he was so cheerful, Richard thought darkly, and he frowned at the metal he could see peeking through Ash's fingers. It wasn't his normal cage, which didn't bode well for him.
"What if I don't want to choose?" Richard asked, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Well," Ash drawled, "I'm a firm believer that every man should be able to decide his path, so if you don't want to choose, you don't have to. Not choosing is also a choice, though, and in this case, that means we do both punishments, which I don't think you're going to enjoy half as much as I will."
That was no doubt true. "What are my options?"
"I'm so glad you asked that question, Ricky. Behind door number 1 is this beauty right here," Ash said, he opened his hand to display a cock cage with--
"Are those spikes?" Richard asked, his voice higher than normal.
"Why, yes, Ricky. Yes, they are." Ash smiled, white and blinding. "These are called Kali's Teeth because Kali is a bitch and as you can imagine, they keep you from getting an erection. As you can also imagine, I'll be doing everything I can to give you an erection while you're wearing this."
"You are enjoying this far too much," Richard glared at the evil cock cage, "What's option number 2?".
"Number 2 is a spanking."
"A spanking?" Richard repeated and eyed Ash suspiciously.
"Yes, a plain, old-fashioned spanking. My hand; your ass."
He could feel his cheeks getting hot at the very thought of it. "And there's no way," he bit his lip, worrying at it until Ash reached up and stopped him, "No alternative, maybe,"
"What? To being punished?" At Richard's nod, Ash shrugged helplessly. "Nope. This is happening, so just tell me which one you pick."
Richard swallowed, his throat clicking. "How long would I wear the cage?"
"Thirty minutes, same as always."
"And how many times would you, you know?" he made a swinging gesture with his hand.
"What, spank you? Twenty, although the last five would probably be hard."
He couldn't help but ask, "How hard?"
"Pretty hard," Ash said and smirked, "But you're a big boy aren't you!"
Richard ignored him, more concerned
with making a decision. Ash hadn't said anything about a time limit, but Richard knew it had to exist anyway.
He didn't want a spanking; he didn't want the immediate pain or the obvious humiliation. His parents had never spanked him so this was a total unknown. The cock cage though, he knew how he reacted to that and he definitely didn't want those spikes anywhere near his penis. Which meant he had his answer.
"Option 2."
"The spanking?" Ash asked, and Richard couldn't tell if he was happy or disappointed.
"Yes."
"Okay," Ash set the cage on the nightstand, "The gentleman chooses option two. Let's do this."
"What now?" Richard asked, even though he'd expected it. He still didn't feel prepared though.
"I firmly believe that punishments should be carried out swiftly," said Ash piously, "No time like the present!"
Ash arranged Richard so his feet were on the ground and he was bent over the side of the bed. It was clear why the bed was as high as it was and it allowed Richard's forearms to take most of his weight.
When Ash rested his hand on Richard's back he looked back over his shoulder. Ash's look was predatory and he was poised over Richard, so centered in himself that Richard's breath hitched at the sight of him. He was already mostly erect just from being in this room with Ash and his simmering anxiety over what was about to happen was not enough to curb his body's ignorant enthusiasm.
"What's your safeword, Ricky?" Ash asked his voice deeper than usual, and Richard sucked in a quick breath before exhaling slowly. Even now, Ash was giving him his safeword.
"Vista," he said and saw Ash nod in acknowledgment.
Richard turned back and let his head hang between his shoulders, looking down at the pale grey bed linen. He felt something settle inside him, something calm and heavy.
"I know you're nervous and you should be. This is going to hurt," Ash's hand was hot and heavy on Richard's back. "But it's not going to hurt that much, Ricky," he said and slowly stroked the arch of Richard's back. "It's just my hand, and I'm not going to leave bruises. Okay?"