“Yes.”
He holds me in his arms and whispers, “Good,” as he sighs. “But one more thing.”
“Hmm?”
“Don’t kiss another guy in front of me or consider being his wife.”
Wife…consort. I hate both words. I retract my steps, arms falling to my sides—his are hesitant to do the same. The railing is at my back and the distance between us is enough that I don’t get too distracted by his lure. “I…um. I’m considering staying here.”
Marc’s face goes blank, but his stare burns. He takes three steps back. “Stop it, Kylie,” he says slowly. He saunters to my left and leans over on the railing. “You aren’t,” he says low. “You can’t.”
I run my hand over my face and swallow hard. The conversation causes squirms in my stomach, and my palms sweat. “It doesn’t sound all that bad.”
Marc straightens from being leaned over the railing. He keeps it clutched tightly in his balling fists. He sighs. “Okay, Ky.” It’s not okay, but Marc doesn’t argue. He’s made sure to remind me of that on multiple occasions.
I wait for him to add something else, and when he doesn’t, I say, “I think it’s a good opportunity. There’s really nothing for me back home.”
“Huh?” He jerks upward and steps into my sight. A flash of anger steals his face, but he quickly consumes it as he says, “Nothing,” the word carries so much emphasis as he gestures to himself, “for you back home.”
I rub my watering eyes with the back of my hand. “I’m a Normal now, Marc. I’ve periodically contemplated life outside of Separation and without Luke. The world is a new place back there. Could you imagine fighting without Sean?”
Marc throws his hands on top of his head and clasps them, saying, “No. But Creations have done it, they still do it every day. You wouldn’t be alone, Ky. Ever.”
I turn away from Marc back to the pond. The fountain has stopped spraying, and the water gently waves from the wind brushing its surface. I don’t know what Luke would want me to do. I can hear him telling me not to stay with Marc because my feelings are too strong. Or he could tell me to consider that I may be walking into a trap. But how else will I obtain the answers we need?
I miss Luke’s help. I miss his toughness and cajoling. If he were still here, everything would be different. The more I think about him, the more my head hurts, and a knot forms in my throat. I want my brother back.
“Well,” I say, sniffing. “The only thing working through my mind is trying to see myself going off to war without my lifeline, and trying to hold on to the memory of his fading smile or his angry expression when I’d say something he disagreed with.” My voice cracks, and I clear my throat. “And don’t try to relate to me with your sympathetic words, or comfortable hugs, or even try to make me feel better. Because you know what…” I lean over, placing my forehead to the cool stone of the railing, and I breathe through the need to mourn my brother’s unfair death.
Marc taps my side. “You’ve not eaten in days, Ky. Come on. Let’s grab a burger.”
He’s on to something. I’m starving and sleepy, but eating will make me more tired. I shake my head. “I’ll be okay.”
Marc slips his finger through my hair and gracefully rubs my pounding head. A sigh rips from my throat as a tear drops from my eye. He squats down beside me and looks up to meet my eyes. “It’s on me. Eat. I’ll keep you awake all night by not leaving you alone.”
Chapter Thirteen
*Marc*
Kylie and I sit at the bar on the first floor of the Inn, and I order a beef burger with a side of fries. When the bartender returns with my order, I push the food in front of Kylie, and she scarfs it down like it is her first and last meal. Sean and I grabbed a pizza earlier, after Kylie kicked me out.
Sean likes Ky as a person, but not as my person. He hates that my concern for her has grown so strong. And it’s confusing for the both of us.
Ky definitely has me confused.
First, she’s trying to kill me—fight me—and now she’s forgiving. Peacefully sitting beside me like all is well between us now. I’m not complaining, I want it this way, but when it’s too easy, I question it.
Her movements grow slow, sluggish. The skin around her eyes has darkened, and her lips are red like the ketchup hanging on to the corner of her mouth. Her hair’s messy, loose strands falling onto her plate, and I would swipe them out of the way, but she may bite my hand off for getting too close to her food.
I gesture for the bartender to bring a water. He quickly drops it off, and I pass Kylie the straw. She downs it instantly.
“Can I take you back to your room?” I ask when she’s finished eating.
She belches and wipes her mouth with the napkin she snatches from the countertop. “I’m tired.” She gets up and heads for the elevator.
I follow behind her. If she didn’t want me to, she would’ve stayed sitting on the barstool, playing with the fork or the ice cubes in her glass. Anything to avoid sleeping in my arms.
“Marc?”
“Dammit!” I hiss under my breath. Collins.
I throw a glance over my shoulder to see how far back she is—only a few feet. Kylie has stopped. She watches Collins’s quick approach with sober eyes and a relaxed stance.
“Now’s not a good time, Collins.” I’m so close to cracking through Kylie’s growing concrete wall. If I can get her in a good enough place to sleep for a few hours, I’ll be fine. She’ll be fine.
Kylie steps to my side and pushes me by my shoulder. I hold my ground, hearing her say, “I’m not going to kill her.” She smirks, saying, “She’s like me. But still not better than me. I pity her.”
I groan, pushing my hair from my face as I step between them, facing Collins. “Collins, just walk away. You’re both in your feelings and need some sleep.”
“We don’t need a mediator, Marc.” Collins tries to shove me aside, but I’m not moving. Pointing past my shoulder at Kylie, she says, “You better be happy you’re important to these people or I would slit your throat for what you did, Ky.”
“Move, Marc,” Kylie hisses.
Shaking my head, I purse my lips and drone, “I’m not moving.”
Kylie sighs. “You should be ashamed of yourself, Collins. Down on your knees for the enemy. You’ll do anything for some attention, you—”
I clamp my hand over Ky’s mouth before the word slut or bitch can stab Collins in the throat. I pull her into the opening elevator and hurry the doors to close. Collins can’t make it in time, and I grumble with relief. “Four,” I say to the elevator.
“I could’ve taken her,” Kylie says.
“I know,” I say reflexively, watching her reflection in the golden doors. She’s looking down, kicking the toe of her boot against the gold carpeted floor. She lifts her head slightly, and her gaze flicks up at my back. “Whatever you’re thinking, we’ve settled it. Don’t take your anger for Collins out on me.”
She gives me a dismissive wave. “Shut up, Marc.”
“Fine.”
The door chimes, and she charges past me and heads to our left.
My room is the other direction, and damn, do I want to head there and pass out. But I head to the left, to make sure she’s okay. I care too fucking much.
I make it to her as she’s opening the door, and she shoves me hard against my chest. “Wait,” I say, dodging blows. “What did I do now?” She tries to kick me, and I knock her leg down. “Enough!” I catch her by her wrist and yank her to me. I seal her in my arms, holding her tight against me. “There.” Late at night, in the middle of the hall where anyone could walk by and see us, I hug my affection into Kylie. “All this acting out and immature tantrums are a waste of your energy.” She tries to shove me away, but I’m not letting her go.
The door is cracked, and I shuffle us into the room and nudge the door closed with my foot.
“Don’t try to attack me, Ky. I’m going to let you go.”
“Don’t,” she whispers. Kylie
wraps her arms around my back, clutching at my shoulders as she turns her head into my neck. “Don’t let me go yet. Please.”
The muscles in my legs are screaming, and my back is tight. At any minute, I’m bound to fall over, lids closed, brain shutting off. But I don’t hesitate to say, “I won’t. Ever.” And we stand here until her legs begin shaking from standing too long.
I pick her up, carry her to the bed, and tug off her boots. She blinks twice and forces her eyes to stay open. “You shouldn’t have this much trust to sleep next to me,” she says after a yawn.
I snatch a pillow from the bed. “Who said I was sleeping next to you?” I cross the room to the chair in the corner and prop my foot up on the desk, keeping Ky’s resting frame in sight.
“You can’t stay awake all night.” She yawns again.
“I’m not worried about you. If you really hated me, you would’ve done something about it. Get over it. I was there once, and I got over it. I fell in love with you and turned you into my lifeline. Put you over my brother. I put aside my best judgement and gave up everything for you. And you think all of it was a show? Just to get you to reveal your heart to me and get in your pants?”
Kylie turns on to her back and tips her chin to look at me. I sit in the corner in the shadow, leaning my head against the wall. I, too, peer at her through my lashes, growing tired, not only of explaining myself, but of the day as well.
“I don’t know, Marc. None of it makes sense.”
“You know, Ky. You sometimes choose to ignore information, like you want to remain in the dark. And now, you want to stay angry, wasting your time fighting everyone you see. Except for your overly happy boyfriend, Carson. You’re remaining angry with Collins because you two just don’t get along. You got your vengeance when you saved Collin’s life just so she could experience the loss of her twin. Wasn’t death good enough of a punishment?”
“I—”
“Hush. Let me finish.” She grunts and looks away from me. I snap up from the chair and am at the foot of the bed in two strides. Over her, I press my fists onto the bed to hold my weight. “Collins wasn’t enough. You came for me and my brother, shot me in the neck and shot Sean twice. Sean doesn’t hate many people. He actually thinks this shitty world isn’t so bad. But where he actually liked you once, you’ve quickly turned those tables. I, on the other hand, can’t get over you. Haven’t been able to since the first day you checked me out in the hallway back home.”
“I wasn’t checking you—”
“I said hush.” She smacks her lips, a sound I’ve never heard her make before. “So what is it? You want me out of the way? You want me dead too?”
“Exactly.”
Her response silences me momentarily. She can’t mean that. It’s hard to see her face, with the shine of her eyes beaming up at me. I clear my throat after I gather my words. “But death isn’t good enough, right? So whose punishment will it be by taking me out, yours or Sean’s?”
Kylie lifts her hand to my cheek, and I nearly relax against it, but a reminder of her kicking me in the back on too many occasions encourages me to use better judgement. Instead, I wait for her words. “You hurt me.” She points to her chest with her free hand. “Right here,” and points to her temple, “and here.” Her hand falls from my face and she grabs my shirt at my waist, causing it to pull tight around my back. “It’s not because of Luke. I know you two were good friends, and Luke wouldn’t befriend anyone. But it’s because you got the jump on me, and I would’ve never expected that. I know you’ve apologized, but my head still hurts. It feels like the only way to make me feel better is to lose you too, never see you again, if it be death or walking away. Maybe if I lose you, I’ll feel better about me.”
I lower down to my elbows to free up my hands. Closer, I can make out her face. I brush her hair from her forehead, and she turns away from me. “You’re not responsible for Luke either. And you don’t have to lose me but use me. Talk to me. Hug me. Stay up late at night and open up to me. I’m not going anywhere. From the day you told me to stay, I’ve been here. So push me off, try to kill me, try to move here. Leave. Get married. Whatever you think is best. I’m staying.”
A smile tugs at her cheeks, but she fights it. “It would be out of the ordinary if I were to marry and you were to tag along.”
“Tell me something we’ve done that has been ordinary, Ky.” Ky adjusts, and I stop her from moving. “Wait. Do you want to take back what we did?”
“Yes.”
I hide the blow by clearing my throat and adjust from hovering over her to lying on my back beside her.
Kylie props herself up on her elbow and her eyes beam at me. “You weren’t expecting that one, were you, Marc?”
I shrug once. “You’ve done a lot of things over the past couple of days that I wouldn’t have expected.” I shake my head, taken far off guard by her revelation. Kylie says a lot. Most of it she doesn’t mean, keeping up an image, and damn it, does she play her part well. So I have to ask, “Did you mean it?”
She leans over.
Her kiss lingers on my lips as she inhales deeply. She releases a sigh, kiss deepening as her body curves against mine. With her hand pressed to my cheek and mine on her back, I accept her answer and am content with her truth.
“I want to mean it,” she says against my chin before laying her head on my chest.
I smirk. “But your wants don’t matter.”
“Sorry I shot you. And Sean.”
I rub my hand over her head, sighing. “Just get some sleep.”
Chapter Fourteen
I breathe. Marc’s heartbeat pounds in my ear as I lie awake on his chest. It taps against the side of my face, and I consider the impact of his existence on my life. I can’t lie, it’s huge. And if it made sense, or we could find a way for all this craziness to work in the world we live in, maybe we could exist together. But everything has changed.
I’ll miss him…a lot.
The rising sun brightens the hotel room. I carefully sit up, place a kiss on Marc’s cheek, and ease off the bed. He sleeps peacefully, and I don’t want to wake him as I leave. I also want to avoid as many questions as possible. Because most of my answers will be lies. I can’t tell him about the letter, nor can I reveal that my parents and Luke and I may be Itteix. I still don’t know what Itteix is. So it’s best to avoid it all together.
I gently pull the room door closed and head down the hall to the elevator.
“Ky,” Sean calls from behind me. I look over my shoulder. “You seen Marc?”
I hand him my key. “Yeah. He’s in my room.” I point two doors down from where we stand.
“Thanks.”
“Hey, Sean,” I call as he turns for the door. “Sorry.”
He nods, turning away.
I finish walking down the hall and take the stairs instead of waiting for the elevator. Marc will be up soon and will try to find me as soon as he realizes I’ve left. I’ve known Marc for less time than I’ve known Luke, and the thought of losing him hurts me more than the loss of my brother. I don’t understand that. Even the thought of the world ending sounds better than us ending. My intentions may cause me to feel desolation: anguished misery or loneliness, but it’ll pass eventually. At least that’s what Luke would say.
I search the lobby and conference rooms for Jord, curious about today’s itinerary. I head down a gold-painted hall that leads away from the lobby to two black doors, and I realize I’ve headed the wrong direction. That is, until Seits exits through the doors.
“Hello, Kylie. I see you’ve finally slept.” She drags her hand over her bald head and blinks slowly. The golden columns shine against her brown skin, making it match the radiance of the hall. “At least one of us has gotten our rest.”
I nod and look away from her. “Um.” I pause and meet her bloodshot, drooping eyes. “Thank you. For your protection.”
Seits steps her feet apart from each other and juts out her chin. She looks down at me through her
lashes, the spitting image of her brother. “We are not the same, Kylie.” Her whisper is so low I step closer. “You are still a child, new to many avenues of our government, of our world. At your age, we think we have it all figured out, and one day, we discover there’s someone who knows a little more than we do, even about ourselves.”
“And that would be you?” I ask with a nod in her direction.
Seits turns down the corners of her mouth. “No. That would be the people in charge. And I needed to prove them wrong in order to save your life. We needed you and Luke to help us. We needed Fein and Floyd as well, and it was shocking to discover my brother thought otherwise. But,” she crosses her arms and draws her shoulders back, “what’s in the past is in the past.”
“Well,” I carry on, “It’s appreciated, Madam Seits. I was looking for General Jord. Would you happen to know when the departure for base will be?”
“This evening, after sundown.” She flicks her wrists and checks her watch. “We have more than enough time.”
I lift a brow and think over her response. “Sundown? When the Zombies are at large?”
“We need more weapons, and we have to give them the time to make them. We can’t wait until tomorrow. So like last time, as soon as they’re completed, we’re out of here. They’ll have the plane loaded up, and we’ll be prepared, armed, and ready by the time we land.”
Chatter sparks behind me in the lobby. I recognize the cheerful, boyish voice greeting the guests. “I see,” I say to Seits, looking over my shoulder to Carden gleefully strolling the lobby. “Excuse me. I need to speak with the future Guidance leader.”
“Kylie?” Seits catches me as I pivot. “We’ve been made aware the Guidance has offered you a potential placement change to live here and become, what I like to call, a sidekick to one of the leaders of the Guidance.” She pauses and looks me straight on. “In light of recent events, you may be considering the change, and while I’m not in a place to sway your thoughts… this place,” her arms splay at her sides as she gestures around us, “is not what you were built for. It’s not what your parents wanted. It’s not what we want.”
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