“Hey.” His tone is careful.
“Hi, what are you up to?” I sit on the sand, next to the jetty. I hadn’t realized how far I had walked.
“Nothing. Why?” He sounds defensive.
“Sorry I called,” I huff in annoyance. One minute he wants to get back together, next minute he’s standoffish.
“Don’t be like that, Summer.” His voice is all breathy through the phone speaker.
“You called first,” I remind him. Why do our conversations always end up with tension between us?
“I know.” Ryan sighs, clearly irritated by my call.
I hear a female voice call out to him. “Sorry, I’ve interrupted you.” I hang up before he can try to explain and I feel the stupidity bubbling in my heart. I can’t stop the tears from pooling and spilling over my cheeks. I am so stupid to think he meant what he said the last time I saw him.
“Penny for your thoughts.” A deep voice brushes my ears. I wipe my tears with my fingers and gaze up to see him standing on the jetty, hands in his pockets. My heart slams against my chest at the sight of him, every inch of him screams danger.
“How long have you been standing there?” I sniff and watch him jump down onto the sand next to me.
“Long enough.” His voice is husky.
“What are you doing here? Where are your two sidekicks?” I look around and notice the sun has set.
“They’re taking care of things.”
“Right.” I roll my eyes at him. “Amber will be most pleased you’ve followed her here.” I stand up and brush the sand off me.
“It wasn’t her I followed.” His eyes are intense and they see right through me. Right through my attempt at hiding my need for him to touch me again.
“Oh.” Is all I manage as I watch him step towards me.
His demeanour is intimidating and he chucks me under my chin, his eyes growing darker. “Why were you crying?”
My eyes go wide at his question and I try to move my chin out of his grip but he holds it firm between his thumb and finger, it’s almost painful. “My ex.” My voice comes out as a quiver.
“Fuck him,” Enzo growls.
My eyes search his for an indication of where this is going. My breath heaves in my chest, I’m not sure if it’s from fear or excitement.
“Ask me, freshman.” He licks his lips.
I blink a few times, registering his request. “Touch me.” My lips part waiting for his response.
His hand moves to cradle the back of my neck and he pulls me into him, his mouth crashing into mine. All the air leaves my lungs. My body turning to goo. His tongue grazes along my lower lip before he takes it between his teeth and bites, hard enough to make the pain feel pleasurable. I feel his hand snake its way up my back under my jumper and touch my overheated skin, he pulls me tighter against him. My hands grip his black t-shirt, pulling him as close to me as I can.
“I can’t get enough of you,” he whispers against my neck.
This is news to me. The way he has been toward me made me think he liked to torture me. His tongue trails feather light flicks until it reaches just under my ear and I let out a quiet moan.
“As much as I want to fuck you right here, right now. I’m not a fan of the grinding sensation of sand.” He pulls back and my hands are still fisted in his shirt.
My breathing is ragged and I feel I might pass out any minute. I let go off his t-shirt and stand there unsure of what to say or do. My phone vibrates in my jumper pocket and I retrieve it to see Amber is calling. She must have woken to an empty house.
My eyes dart to his before I answer, “hey, I’m on my way back now. I went for a walk.”
“Okay, hurry back.” She sounds worried.
I gaze up at the devil in front of me, in his black t-shirt and jeans. “Amber is back at the beach house.”
“I’ll walk you.”
“You don’t have to.” I look at his chest, avoiding his eyes.
“You are not walking along the beach, in the dark, by yourself.” He places his hands in his pockets.
He is final in his decision and who am I to argue. I make my way back to the beach house with Enzo trailing behind me. Neither of us speaks and it’s less awkward than I thought it would be.
“Amber, I’m back,” I announce as we make our way onto the back deck.
“What are you doing here.” Amber glares at Enzo.
“Business.” He shoots her a warning look before sauntering past us and into the lounge.
Amber grabs my elbow. “I’m so sorry, Summer.”
“It’s okay, I found him down by the jetty. He’s just looking out for you.” I smile to reassure her that I don’t mind.
“I’ll get rid of him.” She lets go of my elbow and storms into the house.
“You can’t be here.” Her small frame looks tiny next to his height.
“I wasn’t planning on being here, cousin,” he seethes.
Amber grabs his arm and drags him out the front of the house. I want him to stay, but I don’t want him to stay. My mind is a muddled mess. It’s not healthy. I make my way to the kitchen, turn on the oven and put in two frozen pizzas. If he stays, there should be enough for all of us. They have been out there for a good twenty minutes and my curiosity gets the better of me. I find myself near the open window eavesdropping. I can hear their whispers carrying in the wind.
“She can never know, Amber.” Enzo’s rough voice is clear as day.
“Fuck. Why did he send you here. Why couldn’t someone else handle it?” Amber seethes.
“Because I am the best of the best,” Enzo sighs. “Do you think I fucking get to choose what I do?”
“I don’t know how this shit works. All I know is I don’t want to know about it. Stay away from her, Enzo,” Amber seethes before I hear her footsteps nearing.
I hightail it back to the kitchen. I pretend to check the pizza’s in the oven and their edges are a little burned. I quickly take them out and place them on the stove top.
Amber rushes in, her face wears a look of panic. “Going for a soak in the tub.” I watch her storm off down the hall.
“I don’t eat frozen pizza.” His voice is quiet.
I turn around and Enzo stands with his hands braced on the top of the door frame, his t-shirt riding up and revealing muscular abs, with a trail of dark hair.
“Finished looking, freshman?”
My eyes snap up to his, waiting for his cruel remarks to continue. Why is he like this? When we are alone, he’s all handsy and when there’s company, he’s cruel.
“The ferry service is suspended. Looks like you have the pleasure of my company for the evening,” he muses.
I take a sharp breath as he pushes off the door frame and saunters over to me. “You can have the room upstairs.” I manage to squeak out.
“Last time we were alone in a kitchen, you mauled me.” His eyes sparkle with amusement.
“Excuse me.” I blush, the heat rising up my neck.
“Don’t you remember?” He leans in, his lips inches from mine. “I can jog your memory.”
I swallow and stare at his lips.
“Beg me like the whore you are.” His words are vicious and take me by surprise.
I try to push him away from me but he’s too strong, my attempt excites him and he pins me against the bench with his hips. I close my eyes and will myself to not want what my body is aching for.
“Don’t ever defy me again, freshman.” His tone is menacing. He grabs my wrists in his large hands and pulls them around his back holding me in place. He grinds his hips against me. “You like that don’t you?”
I swallow hard, fighting the urge to give in to him. This is wrong on so many levels and yet I still want it. I still need it. I need his hands on me again. I need him to make me come undone under his touch. I groan and lean my head back, fighting my urges. “Amber will see us,” my voice is all throaty.
“Like I give a fuck,” he growls into my neck.
The
click of the bathroom door has him step away from me and a look of surprise washes over his usually guarded features. I turn around and hold on to the edge of the bench for support. What the fuck is this devil of a man doing to me. He’s cruel with his words, generous with his touch and I can’t get enough of him.
“You’re still here.” Amber waltzes out in her pajamas.
“Freshman, said I can stay,” he says matter of fact before taking the stairs two at a time and disappearing.
“You don’t have to let him stay you know?”
“I know, but where else is he going to go?” I shrug.
We eat in the lounge and watch the catch-up episodes of The Bachelor. Amber falls asleep by midnight with her half-eaten pizza still on her plate. I remove the plate, place the throw over her and make sure the doors and windows are locked before going to bed. I shudder at the thought of the dead body near the jetty earlier today. The creep who murdered and dumped it is still on the run and could be on this very island. In a way I’m thankful that Enzo is here in the house with us.
Chapter Nine
Enzo
His arms thrash around under the water, trying to grab a hold of me, or anything that might help him resurface. My grip tightens around his throat, my muscles burn under the strain. If he would just fucking stop fighting and give up already. I glare into his eyes as they bulge from the lack of oxygen, his skin is slowly turning white and soon will be a nice tinge of blue purple. I try to count the bubbles as they escape his nose and mouth but they are coming too fast now, usually a sign he will gasp and breathe in a mouth full of water. I count down from ten, waiting, as his arms stop moving and his body stills. His eyes wide open, stare up at me, void of life. There is a stillness in death, not something one experiences often. I watch him carefully as his legs sink into the murky water and a small part of me is jealous of his peace. I look into his eyes and wait for another ten seconds before releasing him into the ocean. As soon as I let go of him, his hands shoot up and grab me by the neck.
“Fuck.” I sit up in the bed, sweat pouring down my neck and chest. The sheets are damp and my heart is about to explode. It was just another dream.
Another.
Fucking.
Dream.
My breaths heave as I try to control them, the irony of feeling like I’m suffocating is not lost on me. I claw at the walls of my sanity as I sink lower and lower into my pit of anxiety. These dreams haunt me for days after, always toying with me until I find something else to occupy myself with.
The feeling of needing to escape, to run fast and far away, itches at my skin, making me tingle. I know what is about to transpire, I feel it brewing deep in the pit of my soul, slowly making its way up to my surface. I try, I try so fucking hard to keep myself in check, to never let anyone see this side of me. It is a weakness I cannot share. A weakness that will no doubt be the end of me. I promised my father I would be ruthless. Strong. Worthy of this family and its title.
For him.
For me.
For the family.
I scramble out of the bed, I can hear the noisy waves crash against the shoreline, their taunting beckoning me. I tear through the door and take the stairs two at a time, my heart racing against the ticking time bomb in me that’s about to lose it. Something makes me stop at her door, I grip the door frame for support as I fight with my inner turmoil as to why this is such a fucking bad idea. The thought of sharing this pain with someone is too hard to resist, maybe it will halve its agonizing pull over me. The need for someone to ride this wave with me just once makes me do the most un-Enzo thing, I open her door and slide in without another thought, locking it behind me.
I can just make out her form in the dim moon light. My heart sinks. She shouldn’t be burdened with all my shit.
“Enzo?” Her voice shatters through my steel walls.
A new wave of nausea and dizziness takes a hold of my mind and body, like the waves crashing against the shore, slowly chipping away at each layer one by one until the raw and vulnerable core is exposed. I stride to her bed and sit on the edge, careful not to get too close to her. I grip my head in my hands and lean over waiting for the bile to pour out of my mouth. A low hiss escapes my lips as the sensation of free falling into the depths of my despair take a hold of me.
Her gentle hand touches my clammy shoulder and I break, unleashing all the pent up anger and regret, pouring it selfishly onto her pure and innocent skin.
Chapter Ten
Summer
I lay in bed wide awake, listening to the waves crash against the shore. Thoughts of Enzo here, in my house, keeping me from sleep. I try to convince myself to keep as far away from him from now on, as far as humanly possible but my mind has other tricks. It keeps going over the pantry incident and then what he said to me at the jetty. Why can’t he just say what he means? Why is he always an asshole and then next second he can’t keep his hands off me? I groan into my pillow in frustration.
I hear footsteps and my door creaks open, I lay as still as I can, my heart hammering in my chest. I watch as a tall figure slides into the room, closes the door and locks it behind them. “Enzo?” His name falls from my lips and the scent of his cologne confirms it.
He doesn’t speak as he makes his way to my bed. I feel the indent of the bed as he sits on the edge. From the light of the moon, I can see he is in boxers and nothing else. I swallow my nerves and watch him, waiting to see what he wants. He leans forward and holds his head between his hands, his breaths come out fast and shallow and he lets out a low hiss.
“Are you okay?” I sit up, glad it’s dark enough in here so he can’t see I’m only wearing a singlet and no bra.
A small sob escapes his lips and my heart twists in pain for him. I place my shaky hand on his shoulder and squeeze gently, his skin is hot under my fingertips. At that moment he shifts on the bed, grabs my hands and pulls me on top of his lap so I am straddling him and he buries his face in my neck. He lets out a strangled cry, his muscled arms wrap around my back and he holds on to me for dear life. His grip tightens as his cries become louder and I feel the wetness from his tears soak my front. I hold on to him as he shudders with each sob and allow him to pour whatever hurt he has onto me. We sit like this, holding on to each other until his heaving chest becomes shallow breaths and his cries become whimpers. At some point in the night he moves so that we lay down on the bed, arms wrapped around each other. I’m not sure at what time Enzo’s breathing slows and he finally gives in to sleep, but his arms never slacken. I hold this broken man and hope he has some comfort in my touch.
I haven’t slept and as the sun rises, it reveals this beautiful broken man in my arms. I wish I knew what causes his anguish but I know not to ask. He will confess his secrets when he wants to. Enzo’s usually dark and broody face is soft and relaxed in his sleeping state. His mouth is slightly open and I watch his eyes flutter and wonder what he’s dreaming about. His arms are still wrapped around me and I’m scared to move so I don’t wake him.
He stirs, slowly opens his molten dark eyes and searches my face for something. “Hi,” he says as his hand comes up and brushes my hair off my face.
“Hi,” I reply shyly.
“I should get going before someone catches me in here.” But he doesn’t move.
His face is so close and I want to run my fingers along the fine layer of scruff along his jawline. “Sounds like a good idea.” I smile as I take in every inch of his face. The sharp, unshaven lines of his jaw, his pink lips and his almost black eyes. A crease forms between his dark eyebrows and I sigh, knowing he is cursing himself internally for coming into my room and falling apart in front of me.
I feel his fingers brush circles against my back. “I’m going to need my arm from under you.” He licks his lips.
“Oh.” I move to allow him to remove his arm from under my neck. The cruel and vicious devil returning as his eyes leave mine and he pulls his arm out.
I watch him stand, his muscled back to
me. I take in all that is the monster before me, his boxers hang low on his hips and his long athletic legs are deliciously tanned. I get the unwanted feeling of emptiness, a feeling I have no right to have. This man is not mine and never will be. He walks to the door and hesitates before turning back, our eyes meet and he takes in a sharp breath. “Thank you,” he sighs and slinks out the door.
I feel as though my heart has been torn into a million pieces and it dawns on me, I have feelings for the devil that is Enzo.
Enzo is gone from the beach house by the time I climb out of bed, which is probably a good thing as I don’t think either of us wants to face each other after last night. I find Amber on the back deck watching the waves.
“Morning.” I sit next to her.
She takes a sip of her coffee before looking at me. “I heard him crying last night.”
My heart sinks. “I don’t know what to say.” I look at my hands, embarrassed.
“He’s a good person, Summer,” Her words are lost in the wind.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know what to do, he needed something I guess? I don’t even know what was wrong with him,” I plead with her to forgive me.
“Hey.” She reaches out a reassuring hand and intertwines her fingers in mine. “Don’t be sorry. Enzo is complicated, but deep down he’s caring and gentle. I’m glad he has finally allowed someone close enough to him to comfort him.” She squeezes my hand before letting it go.
“Nothing happened last night. He just cried and it broke my heart to see him that way.”
“Just be careful, he’s not who you want in your life. I love him dearly because he’s family and I’ll put up with his shit. But you don’t have to.” She takes another sip of her coffee.
“Thanks for the warning. I doubt I have anything to worry about, he’s going to go back to being his usual asshole self, next time I run into him,” I laugh because there is no doubt in my mind that Enzo will unleash his worst on me to make me forget the few hours I saw of his vulnerable side. “Let’s go out for breakfast.”
Cruel Summer: A College Bully Romance (Verona Academy Book 1) Page 8