“Definitely. Oh, and don’t tell mum about the café! Love you.”
“Love you too sis - and you know I always keep your secrets.”
As they both hung up, Lee grinned, realising she felt a lot better than she had done before the phone call had begun.
***
Bells jingled in the background and Christmas was truly in the air thanks to a combination of CDs playing from shops that had stayed open late for the special opening of the market, carollers singing and a band that was just setting up to begin its festive set. Gina and Lee walked with their arms linked - something Lee had never really done with her female friends but that Gina seemed keen on with everyone. Gina’s group of friends were waiting by the beautifully lit Christmas tree, which was a key location for a group of school-age carol singers. With hugs, hellos and congratulations on their first successful day of running a café, the group set off to peruse the small set of stalls that made up the town’s market. White fairy lights hung from most of the displays, and through the mist they gave a sort of halo effect to the town square. The longest queue by far was at the mulled wine and hot chocolate stand, and so they decided to have a look at some of the gifts on offer before making their way there, in the hopes that the queue would have gone down.
“I love Christmas!” Lydia sighed as she picked up a hand-felted Santa Claus and glanced at the price. Lee was about to agree, as was her natural reaction to anything about the festive period, but paused for a second. She was trying very hard to take stock of her feelings in the moment - to make sure what she said or felt really was true to herself. For too long she felt that her feelings and decisions had not truly been her own.
After a couple of seconds, she grinned. “Me too!” Laughing at a hand-made cushion cover that said ‘Bah, Humbug!’, she fished out her purse and handed over a ten pound note; it was the perfect Christmas present for her Scrooge of a sister.
A few purchases and half an hour later, the group felt they had exhausted the delights of the Christmas market and were in need of a hard-earned cup of mulled wine. Fortunately, the crowd around the stall seemed to have subsided a little, and Lee and Gina only queued for a couple of minutes to get drinks for all their friends.
“Are you in charge of every drink in this town?” a smooth, deep voice asked from beside Lee. Attempting to balance three mugs of mulled wine, Lee turned to find herself face to face with the police officer from earlier in the day - but this time in civilian clothing. That curly, blond hair looked even darker in the dim light of the evening, and he wore black jeans and a knitted black jumper with Christmas stars embroidered on it.
Lee wasn’t sure how long she was silent for, but a jab in the ribs from Gina (which almost made her spill all her mugs of mulled wine) reminded her that she could not just stare - she needed to talk.
“Not all of them,” she managed to say, not feeling anywhere near as confident as she had done that afternoon in the glow of her new little café. “Just the good ones!”
“Can I have one of those?” he asked the man behind the stall. “And I’ll get these.” He handed over a twenty pound note despite Lee’s protests. Gina - who Lee hadn’t even noticed disappear - reappeared by her side and took the other two mugs of wine; then she was gone, leaving Lee, the police man and two mugs of gorgeous-smelling liquid.
“You really didn’t need to buy drinks for all of us,” Lee said, blushing a little - whether through nerves, embarrassment or because she really did think he was very good looking, she didn’t know.
“You served me the best coffee I’ve had in years - only way I could pay you back,” he said with a smile that lit up his eyes.
“Well, thank you,” Lee said, deciding not to argue.
“James,” he said, reaching out his hand.
“Lee,” she replied, taking his hand and feeling a delicious tingle where their fingers met. She’d forgotten what flirtation felt like!
“Nice to meet you, Lee. Since we’ve run into each other twice in one day, I thought we should know each other’s names. The café looks great - have you been in the business long?”
“Today was the first day we opened, so no, just a couple of weeks,” Lee said taking a sip of her mulled wine and regretting it when it burned her tongue. Trying to ignore the stinging in her mouth, her mind grasped desperately for something she could ask him.
“Do you work in Totnes often?”
“All over the South Hams,” he replied. “You know what it’s like, cuts all the time, we cover larger and larger areas. But I’m based in Totnes, and I live just outside.”
Lee tried to think of something intelligent to say, but it seemed all thoughts had left her; she was pleased when he filled the gap with another question. “What got you into the café business then?”
“Oh, that’s a long story,” she said, not sure he needed to hear about her husband cheating on her right at this moment. “But the short version is that I’m a lawyer, and I decided to make some changes in my life and, well, here I am! For now, anyway.”
“Wow!” James said, looking slightly bemused. “Lawyer to café owner - quite a jump.”
“Mmm,” she said. “I’m enjoying it though - but we’ll see what happens.” She was sure to make it clear that she was not here for the long run; she wasn’t sure why, but she didn’t want anyone thinking that she would always be around. She knew this was just temporary; time for her to get over her life being torn to pieces before she went back and rebuilt it. A time out; a breather. Not the plan for the rest of her life. Although, at the moment, she didn’t know what that plan looked like.
“It’s great you decided to just follow what you wanted - so many people get stuck in something they hate. At the minute I love my job - I hope I’d be as brave as you if I ever stopped feeling like that.”
Lee considered his words for a moment; was she brave? Or just stupid? She’d definitely been one of those people who pushed on with things even if she wasn’t really that happy… but this decision hadn’t been planned. It had just sort of… happened.
They talked until their mulled wine ran out and Lee mentioned that she should be getting back to her friends.
“It was lovely to see you again,” James said, with a sincere smile and the lightest of touches of his hand to her upper arm. “Would you like to have dinner sometime?”
Lee took a sharp intake of breath. She hadn’t been expecting it - in spite of their flirting, she hadn’t thought he would actually ask her out. “I would love to,” she said, “but I can’t. I’m sorry.”
“Okay,” he said, looking a little disappointed but not letting it change his warm tone. “Can I ask why? Tell me to go away if I’m being pushy.”
“Go away! No, no, I’m joking. My… my marriage just fell apart. It’s the reason for the change… and I can’t date right now.”
James nodded for a moment, a hint of stubble clear on his chin under the light of the moon and the Christmas lights. “That’s fair enough, although I won’t say I’m not disappointed.” Lee smiled; it was nice to know that someone wanted to take her for dinner, even though she knew she wasn’t ready for a step like that. “But I hope to see you around - maybe we can have a drink again. As friends?”
“I’d like that,” Lee said. Then, without planning her words, she blurted out: “I could give you my number?”
“Definitely.” They swapped numbers before Lee could even think about what she was doing, and then James was holding his hand out again for her to shake it.
“Thanks for a lovely evening, Lee.” They shook hands, which felt oddly formal, and Lee wondered if he felt that same frisson as the tips of their fingers met.
And then he was gone, into the darkness, and Lee’s head felt full of a million different thoughts and feelings.
The week passed by in a blur of early mornings, frothy coffees and a lot of customers, and by Sunday Lee was exceptionally pleased they’d decided to close on Sundays for the foreseeable future. Her body ached in ways sh
e didn’t know was possible - but she had slept well every night since Monday night. Monday night had been a different story… she had spent it rehashing the conversations she’d had in the day with James, and questioning her decision that she couldn’t go to dinner with him… maybe she could, maybe just as friends? Then her mind got all churned up again, and so sleep had evaded her for most of the night.
The rest of the week, however, she had been too exhausted for that. After a hot shower and some dinner, she’d been in bed early every night, falling into a deep and mostly dreamless sleep the moment her head hit the pillow. Whilst they hadn’t been as heaving as that first day, there’d been steady trickle of customers all day with a lull at around four in the afternoon, for which they were already planning on how to drive in some more customers. Lee was confident that, when she got a moment to have a look at the books, they wouldn’t disappoint her. She could afford to live for a little while without earning, and she was surprised to realise that the lack of certainty about her income didn’t stress her. She knew she was okay for now; she knew she had a well-paying job to go back to. For the moment, she could focus on throwing her all into this business. Besides, she wasn’t ready yet to think about going back - even though it had been three weeks since she’d first turned up in this eccentric little town.
It was halfway through the second week - when she’d told Gina to take a day off, and that she could run the café by herself for a day, that two people who knew Lee by name turned up.
One was James, the cute police officer.
One was her mother.
***
It was a Wednesday morning, and Lee was in by seven, baking homemade scones ready to serve cream teas in the afternoon. There was a delivery of the other cakes they had decided to stock that week from the local bakery, and Lee enjoyed having a chat with the teenager delivering them before he headed off to college. As she weighed out her ingredients, she pondered this routine she had managed to fall into - it was like she was living a different person’s life, and yet it was beginning to feel like her own. The problem with being at work alone was that it gave her too much time to think; time to think about when she should head home, when she should file divorce papers, when she should confront Nathan about their finances, when she should ring her colleagues and update them on her life… the list was endless.
So wrapped up in her own thoughts was she, she didn’t think to check her phone that morning. When she eventually did an hour later, she had three missed calls and a text that said. ‘Sorry, mum knows about the café and is on her way - not my fault! Sorry! B xxx’
But she didn’t; and so the pounding knock on the door twenty minutes before she was due to open surprised her. Glancing in the mirror above the fireplace as she left the kitchen, she realised she had flour on her face and a few tendrils of hair falling out of the bun she had thrown it up into early this morning. She wiped the flour away, thinking that she could sort her hair later, and headed towards the door. It was only when she opened it that she realised it was her own mother; she was so surprised to see her in this setting that it hadn’t even occurred to her that the petite blonde lady in the dim early morning light could possibly be her mother.
“Shirley!” her mother exclaimed, throwing her arms around her before Lee’s brain had enough time to catch up with the events. “Well finding you has been a mission, hasn’t it.”
Lee stepped out of the way, letting her mother in, and locked the door behind her. She only had twenty minutes, but the last thing she wanted was a customer walking in a little early and finding her in a heated conversation with her mother.
“Hey mum,” Lee said, taking a seat at a table, presuming she was in for a lecture. It wasn’t that she didn’t love her mother; her, Beth and her mum had always got on fairly well, both before and after her father had walked out. In fact, for the last few years, Lee had maintained a far easier relationship with their mother than Beth had. She’d made the choices that Tina wanted for her daughters: a steady career, a nice house, a supposedly happy marriage. Other than having a baby, she always appeared to approve of Lee’s choices in a way she didn’t of Beth’s free spirit.
And that was why Lee knew she was in for a lecture; for so long her decisions had been the ‘right’ ones. Now that she had made her somewhat more questionable decisions, she didn’t think her mother would approve. And one thing Tina Davis never did was hold her tongue.
“Hey mum indeed! Do you know how much I had to get on at your sister before she’d give me this address? You’re my daughter for goodness sake, I haven’t seen you in a month, everything in your life changes and you don’t even tell me where you are? What is this place, anyway?”
“Oh mum,” Lee said, feeling the tears begin to slide down her cheeks.
“Now, now, Shirley, don’t cry,” Tina said, stroking her arm slightly awkwardly. Since their father left, she had always struggled with open displays of emotion. Perhaps it was the weeks of crying that had followed his sudden departure that had put her off…
“I’ve bought the lease. I’m running this place…”
“You’re running it? When your sister gave me this address I thought you lived here, maybe were working a few shifts… is this… a permanent move then?”
“No. Well… I don’t think so, anyway. No, I’ve got a job back home, I’ve told them I’m going back. Things just got so messed up, mum. Nathan…”
“I know. And I’ve given Nathan more than one piece of my mind, believe me. There is always the option to work on it, see a counsellor, see if you can fix things… but no, I can see that’s not an option.” Lee didn’t know if her mother had come to that conclusion before she’d arrived, or whether the glare from Lee had made her hastily change her words, but she was right; there was no going back now. Not to her marriage, anyway.
“Things have fallen apart, mum, and I just need to get my head straight.”
“Three weeks down here though, Shirley, surely it’s time to come back to real life now? You can’t stay hidden down here for much longer. Come home for Christmas, at least.”
“I’ll think about it, mum. Anyway,” she stood, hoping to hint to her mum that she needed to get on, but her mum did not move. “I’ve got to open up, mum.”
“We need to talk, Shirley. I’m worried about you.” Never one to mince her words, Tina stood and looked her tall daughter straight in the eye.
“I finish at half five.”
“I’ll see you then.”
The goodbye was stilted, but Lee did lean down and kiss her mum on the cheek as she left. Then she turned round the open sign, rubbed the tears from her eyes and took a deep breath to try to get her day back on track.
***
It was another busy day, and Lee tried to put her mother and the discussion they were bound to have at the end of the day to the back of her mind. The rhythms of the café made it surprisingly easy to forget: there was a steady stream of customers, most of whom wanted to have a chat about their day, what was going on in Totnes and their plans for the festive period. The repeated actions of heating the milk, grinding the coffee and taking the money kept her mind occupied for most of the day. She wasn’t looking forward to the standard four o’clock lull; they had plans for kids’ happy hour hot chocolates over the holidays, but they wouldn’t start for a couple of weeks and today of all days she didn’t need half an hour for her thoughts to take over. Whenever she did have a pause, she felt on the brink of tears; she blamed her mother’s appearance for her turbulent emotional state.
She lost track of time over the afternoon rush, where many people who were fast becoming regulars came in for fresh, homemade scones, jam and cream. There was often a debate over which order they were put on - Lee had learned that putting the cream first was the Devon way, whereas the jam first was the Cornish way - and people felt surprisingly strongly about the topic! And so the four o’clock lull snuck up on her and before she knew it the café was unexpectedly empty and still. She took a deep b
reath and surveyed it; a few tables to wipe, some sweeping to do before a few people would probably stop in for a cup of tea or coffee after they’d been at work. She was finding they were perfectly placed between the shops and the odd office or two, and the nearest long stay car park; they easily seemed to tempt a few in for a quick cuppa before heading home.
She was busy diligently sweeping the crumbs from the corners of the room when the bell tinkled to signal the door opened. Lee turned with her waitress-smile on (which was very similar to her client smile, or even her in-laws smile) which instantly became genuine when she saw who was at the door.
James stood in his smart black uniform, head not far off the door frame, blond curls slightly mussed from where she presumed his hat had sat before he entered.
“Hi,” she said, unsure why more words weren’t forthcoming.
“Hi,” he said, with a wide smile. “Am I okay to come in for a coffee?”
“Of course,” Lee said, brushing a few crumbs off her hands onto her apron and walking back behind the counter. “We are a café after all!”
The South West Series Box Set Page 8