She sighed and redirected her attention to the front of the church.
“It’s important that you know—that you understand—that God is real in other people’s lives whether you want him to be real in yours or not.”
Elizabeth’s heart skipped a beat. She instantly became laser-focused.
“You see, if you’re sitting in this church and you’re denying God’s existence, you’re making what you think to be a strong choice based on very weak evidence. I’ll even go a step further; you’re denying him entrance into your life because you don’t want him to exist.
“That’s really the long and the short of it, isn’t it?
“Several months ago, I watched a video of a man interviewing students at various college campuses. He was intentionally looking for people who considered themselves atheists. And he wasn’t looking for just anyone who would make that claim; he was looking for students who were involved in the sciences. He wanted to hear the logic behind their assertions that God wasn’t real. When they claimed that science provided the answers for how life came into existence, without a guiding hand, the interviewer asked for proof. He asked for biological, chemical, or cosmological proof to back up their assertions.”
Okay. So, where’s this going? Elizabeth wanted to know.
“The best that they could provide were a bunch of rehashed statements that have been passed down for years, statements which they’d been spoon-fed by their professors and high school science teachers. Things like, ‘Mutations in bacterial organisms have brought about transitional lifeforms,’ supposedly supporting Darwinian Evolution. Another said, ‘I believe in evolution because it can be actively seen in the world around us.’
“Irrespective of the answers that they provided, this man challenged them for scientific proof. Just one verifiable, observable process that showed, without any doubt, that evolution is true. None could provide an answer. This man also interviewed professors, and their answers weren’t any better than those of the students. At the end of the day, no one could prove evolution to be a fact.”
Again, where’s this going? Elizabeth was getting a little frustrated.
“All that to say this: When this man challenged the students with questions about DNA—the ‘instruction book for life’—they were all tripped up by a single question: Did this extremely complex book of highly ordered information, which exists in every cell of every creature, create itself? No one could answer it.
“Lastly, he challenged many of them very directly, contending that they actually do know that there is a God, but that they wanted to ignore his existence because there were things in their lives that they wouldn’t want to be held accountable for by a real, living God.
“Some of the students eventually admitted that that might actually be the case in their lives.
“The question that I want to ask you is, if God exists—and he most certainly does—what is the benefit of trying to fake yourself out by pretending you’re not going to face him someday? What is it that you’re holding onto that is worth sacrificing your soul for? I mean, seriously.
“Is porn or sex so important? Drugs? The ‘pleasures of life?’ Come on. Let’s get real here. God exists, and you want to value these kinds of things more highly than getting to know the one who made you? Are they more valuable than getting to find yourself in Heaven one day?”
Elizabeth found herself emotionally and logically off balance. Was this true about herself? Did she really know that God existed? Was she deliberately sabotaging a relationship with him?
She had to think this through.
ZACH WAS STRUCK by the pastor’s challenge. He’d never been an atheist, never denied that God existed, but he did realize that he’d never really cared about him. Never gave him any real thought. Life had been just fine without him, and he couldn’t have been happier.
Maybe he thought that God was someone that you rushed to when you needed something, but to tell the truth, he’d never really been faced with a need that he couldn’t find an answer to on his own.
So, what am I supposed to do now? Am I supposed to say something to him? Should I say something to Jamie?
“I’m not going to do an altar call,” the pastor went on. “Not exactly. But I do want to lead those of you who want to know God in a prayer. But first, let me say a prayer for all of you.
“Hello, Father. I come to you on behalf of those in this congregation today who don’t know you. I think that many of them want to but haven’t known how. I believe that others have tried to force you out of their lives for so long that they’ve been convinced, almost, that you don’t really exist.
“Come alive for them, Father. Holy Spirit, today we spoke of your unfailing love for people, your desire to live in them, your mission to help them discover who Jesus is and what their purposes are for this life. Please, Holy Spirit, open hearts and minds to Jesus. Help them to receive him as their Savior and Lord. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.”
Zach felt a tear track down his right cheek. He slowly moved his hand to brush it away, hoping that Jenna wasn’t seeing it. For some reason, he looked to his left, past Jamie to Elizabeth, and saw her with her head hanging low.
Her too?
“Pray this with me,” Pastor Justin said. “Dear Jesus. I admit that I believe in you. I’ve decided to believe that what the Bible says about you is true. You came to Earth to rescue me. You died on a cross so that your blood could wash away all of the guilt of my sin. I don’t deserve it, but I ask you to please forgive me. Come into my life, enter my heart, and live there. Help me to live my life for you from this day forward. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.”
“Amen,” whispered Zach.
Chapter 39
S
o, where do we go for lunch?”
An incredulous look appeared on Jenna’s face as she looked at Zach.
With an increasing grin, Zach said, “Well, it wouldn’t be a proper date without both entertainment and food.”
Jenna closed her eyes and shook her head, doing her best to keep a smile from forming on her lips. With as stern a voice as she could muster—and failing miserably—she replied, “Zach, don’t make me sic my dad on you.”
“Heck, I’m not worried. You know the chief loves me,” Zach retorted.
Jenna laughed. Genuinely.
Jamie and Elizabeth laughed too.
The four youths stood in the foyer of the church, waiting for Brent and Tara to come out of the sanctuary. Throngs of people passed by, most making their way to the exits or to the children’s area of the church. Quite a few others made a beeline for the café.
“There they are.” Elizabeth pointed to a far door at the left side of the foyer, directly in front of the café.
The four wandered over, waving to catch their attention.
Brent smiled. “So, how was the group date?”
That caught everyone by surprise.
Elizabeth’s mouth dropped open. “What?”
“Don’t listen to him,” responded Tara. “He’ll say anything to make himself think he’s funny.”
Jamie and Jenna snickered.
Tara asked, “Everyone enjoy the service?”
Surprisingly, Elizabeth replied first. “It was … umm … different. That preacher was funny and not too bad at giving a message.”
Brent raised his eyebrows and looked at Tara.
“Yeah,” said Zach. “Different from the typical day for me too. I didn’t expect anything to happen to me.”
“Wait. Something did?” asked Jamie.
“Yeah.” Zach seemed to stare off into space for a moment. “Something did. For sure.”
“I’m guessing that’s good,” said Brent.
Zach laughed. “I’m guessing it is too.”
Elizabeth interrupted abruptly. “Anyone else hungry?”
Before his mom or dad could suggest anything, Jamie jumped in. “Yep. How ‘bout the four of us go som
eplace that’s not the Fairlane Diner?”
Elizabeth looked at her “parents.” With a slight grimace that also portrayed a look of hope, she asked, “Would it be too much to ask you to watch Kyla for a little while?”
Tara smiled. “Not at all. Let’s go get her from the nursery, and then the other four of us will go someplace that is the Fairlane Diner.”
“Sounds like a plan!” quipped Zach.
Jamie looked at his sister. He could tell that she was conflicted about spending more time with Zach, but Jamie was loving every moment of it.
He shook his head with a grin when he realized that somehow Zach and Elizabeth had successfully taken the reins of the entire Lawton household. At least for the next hour or two.
I can always cut a few more lawns, he thought.
Jamie had spent quite a few days during the summer doing yard work and performing odd jobs for people in their residential development. It was what put money in his pocket for video games and even a little into a savings account for an eventual car.
Right now, there was no way he was going to let Elizabeth even suggest that she pay for his meal today. As for Zach and Jenna? Well, that would be interesting to watch play out.
They’d spent a little over fifteen minutes traveling from the church to a nice little place that Jenna had suggested called The First Half, a restaurant that catered breakfast, brunch, and early lunch.
So far, the day had gone pretty much how he’d hoped.
Pretty much.
The four of them had gotten to spend time together traveling to and from church, had sat together without oversight from the adults, and were now going to enjoy a meal together.
But something was wrong with Elizabeth.
From the time they left the church and began walking to the car, she had clammed up. No explanation for it; she just avoided eye contact and dodged questions about how she was doing.
Everybody stopped asking.
When Zach asked if she wanted them to take her home, she responded only with a shake of her head.
She looked sad. Defeated.
Inside the restaurant and waiting for a table, Zach and Jenna became a little chatty. That was kind of fun to see. Jamie didn’t hold any illusions, though, that the two of them would grow close enough that Jenna would want to spend quality time with him.
“Zach, party of four?”
“Yep. That’s us.”
They followed the hostess to a table set against a large window facing the parking lot. It was a nice day, and the indirect sunlight would make the experience that much better.
Hopefully.
Approaching the table, Elizabeth made sure to choose a seat against the window. Hoping it was somehow still all right to do so, Jamie took the seat next to her. Zach and Jenna took seats on the opposite side of the table, boys across from girls.
After everyone was seated, menus in hand, the hostess said, “Your server will be with you in a couple of minutes.”
“Thank you,” said Jenna.
“Let’s get down to business,” said Jamie, opening his menu. “I’m starving.”
When the server arrived, all were ready and placed their orders.
“Will everyone be on one check?”
Jamie decided to play his lead card. Pointing back and forth to Elizabeth and himself, he said, “Put us both on one check.”
Two things happened simultaneously at that moment: Elizabeth turned to him with fascination in her eyes. In the blink of an eye, she went from looking somewhat sad to somewhat stunned and impressed. The other thing was the production of awkward looks between Zach and Jenna.
It. Was. Priceless!
Jenna responded first with “I guess we’ll be—”
“We’ll be on a separate check too,” insisted Zach. “I mean separate from them. Together for us. I mean, we’ll be together. Separately.”
The server, a young woman in her twenties, laughed. “I think I got it. I’ll be back with your drinks in a minute.”
This time, it was Jenna’s turn to be surprised. But she laughed and shook her head. “Well, thank you, Zach.”
“You’re welcome,” he said, while giving Jamie a hard stare.
Gotcha! Jamie grinned.
It was Jenna that got the conversation moving in a new direction.
“So, today’s speaker was good, wasn’t he?”
Elizabeth’s attention was momentarily drawn toward her. “He was different.”
Zach jumped in. “Over and over again, I kept thinking, ‘So, this is church.’ I don’t know what everyone else’s first time at church was like, but this sure messed with me.”
“Oh yeah? How?” asked Jenna.
Jamie wanted to know the same thing. He leaned into the table and folded his arms on top. Elizabeth’s attention returned to whatever was visible outside the restaurant.
“I don’t know. I guess that I never looked at God as important before. No one in my family really talks about him.”
“Are they atheists?” asked Jamie.
Jamie noticed that Jenna turned very deliberately to look at Elizabeth. While he intentionally didn’t turn his head, he saw out of the corner of his eye that Elizabeth had turned to look at Jenna for a moment before redirecting her attention back out the window.
Now, what was that about?
“No. I don’t think so. I think they believe in God in some way. Not exactly sure. Just never really comes up in conversation.”
Zach paused for a moment, then continued. “So, this guy today really made it sound like God wasn’t only wanting us to pay attention to him, but that he also pays attention. To us, I mean.”
Jamie felt like he should say something. “Yeah, it’s true.”
“By the time the preacher was done talking, I felt like I should say that prayer he said. My heart was beating hard, like it was some really important thing to do. I don’t know. I can’t really explain it.”
“So did you?”
“Yeah, I did. Man, it’s hard to explain what happened.” He thought about it for a moment, then shook his head and said, “Can’t put it into words.”
It occurred to Jamie that what he’d just heard would never have taken place if Jenna hadn’t cornered him several days before on the patio, asking what was more important to him, dating Elizabeth or Elizabeth knowing God.
What if she hadn’t brought all of that up?
Jenna nearly exploded with delight. “Zach! That’s great! You’re part of the family!”
Zach immediately looked a little embarrassed and confused.
“Not really sure what that means.”
“It means,” said Elizabeth in a monotone voice, still staring out the window, “that you just got what the Lawtons have been wanting for me since the day I met them.”
There was a very loud silence that followed.
Jamie’s heart sank. Did that mean she still didn’t believe? She sounded so sad. Distant.
After another moment, Jenna said, “Elizabeth, you’re still my sister.”
Elizabeth turned to face her. Jamie noticed the tears in her eyes. “Yeah, but not the kind you really want.” She pushed back her seat and said, “I’m sorry. I can’t.…” Her voice caught. She stared hard at Jenna for a moment while a tear cascaded down her left cheek. With a slight shake of her head and a strained whisper, she said it again. “I can’t.”
Grabbing her purse, she rose and walked toward the exit, her left hand reaching up to cover her mouth and nose.
The three sat in stunned silence for a moment.
Finally, Jenna stood to follow her.
Jamie stood as well. Looking at Jenna, he said, “No. I need to do this.”
It looked to Jamie like his sister was about to object but thought better of it and nodded. She sat back down, watching him as he turned to leave.
He made his way to the exit and prayed, God, I’m going to need your help. I don’t know what I
’m doing; I just feel like I’m supposed to be the one doing it.
Exiting the restaurant, Jamie looked to his left then right, supposing that she would have been walking the sidewalk along the storefronts. There were plenty of people milling about, but none of them was Elizabeth. He looked out across the parking lot, trying to quickly locate Jenna’s car, and there she was. She had nearly reached the vehicle.
He was nervous, but there was no hesitation. He walked straight for the car, not knowing the first word that would come out of his mouth.
Jamie watched as Elizabeth tried opening the passenger door. It was obviously locked. Crossing her arms, she made her way to the rear of the car and leaned back against it.
He was only a few feet away when Elizabeth said, “I thought it’d be Jenna who tried to get me to go back in.”
“She was going to, but.…” He let the sentence trail off.
Elizabeth’s head dropped, chin against her chest. She began anxiously staring at the pavement. He took a position immediately next to her. The heat from the sun-absorbing trunk was almost a little too warm.
Jamie didn’t know what to say and didn’t know if he should even say anything at all. His heart began to grieve. He could tell that she was hurting somehow but wasn’t sure why. He opened up his mouth to say something, but just as quickly he closed it. He sensed that the Holy Spirit was telling him “no” and to just remain silent. So that’s what he did. He just stood next to her and silently began to pray.
ELIZABETH WAS CRUSHED.
She knew, now, that she was officially a disappointment to everyone.
She also knew that they’d been praying for her. She’d even overheard Brent and Tara doing that very thing. Twice!
For months and months, she had gone to church with her new family. No one had ever forced her. She’d done it because she thought it was the right thing to do to honor all of them. Whether she believed in their God or not, they were the kindest, most generous people she had ever known.
And now what? Why couldn’t she just do it—pull the trigger? Just ask this God of theirs to show up if he was actually real?
That Dark Place Page 22