by Tanya Milne
Elijah plonked himself down on the couch next to me and became as still as a corpse.
‘What’s going on?’ asked Elijah.
Mum and Dad exchanged glances. Then Mum spoke, her voice wavering. ‘How did you find out, Eva?’
‘The book,’ I said, holding back the other hot words that sat in my mouth.
Mum turned to Dad. ‘I thought you destroyed that.’
‘So did I,’ said Dad, his face flushing.
‘What book? Would someone please tell me what’s going on?’ said Elijah.
‘Eva found a book, a very old book. It’s been passed down from one generation to the next,’ said Mum.
I suddenly remembered where I’d seen the book. It was always next to Mum’s bed when we were little. She would read it in bed sometimes. It was as though I were seeing Mum for the first time – she was a witch! It didn’t seem possible, yet somehow it was.
‘It’s a book,’ continued Mum, ‘that explains our family heritage.’ Mum stopped, her words choked in her mouth. Elijah watched me, his eyes full of questions. But this…this, he had to hear from Mum and Dad.
‘And what might that be?’ said Elijah, turning back to Mum.
‘You and Eva are witches,’ said Dad.
Elijah laughed, a full belly laugh. But when no one joined in, he sat back and looked at our three faces in turn, then fell quiet.
‘Your dad is right,’ explained Mum. ‘You were both born into a coven of witches. Your dad and I are both witches, from different covens.’
‘How could you have kept this from us?’ I said, my every word an accusation.
My mum swallowed. ‘You were never supposed to find out. That book was supposed to be destroyed and never see the light of day.’
‘Don’t you see, that’s even worse. What right do you have to keep this from us?’ I said.
‘We didn’t come to the decision lightly, Eva,’ said Mum, her voice breaking. ‘After all, the power of twins really is something quite special.’
Twin witches!
Elijah looked at Mum as though she were on drugs.
‘But we decided to keep it a secret…’ Mum continued. ‘We felt it was too unsafe for you… That you’d both be safer and happier not knowing. When our new mayor came into office and started bringing in new laws, we thought it safer to move away from our coven. We didn’t know he would move here too. I mean, what are the chances?’
I turned away from my mum as the boiling-hot feeling arrived again. My whole life I’d felt as though I had two left feet, never quite fitting in, and only now, when I was seventeen, did I finally understand why.
I stood, narrowed my eyes and spoke in a voice I didn’t recognise. ‘You had no right to keep this from us. No right. This is our birthright and we deserved to know.’
Mum’s and Dad’s mouths dropped open, but I didn’t care.
‘And tell me, what can we do – as witches? What powers do we have? At least tell me that,’ I said.
Mum and Dad exchanged glances before Mum spoke. ‘It will be better for both of you if you don’t know.’
‘What?’ I shouted, realising they had no intention of telling us what we deserved to know. If I stayed, I would say or do things I’d regret for the rest of my life. I glanced at Elijah, who was still. No ugly anger coursed through his blood. He was definitely going to be a white witch – without a doubt. From the frowns on my parents’ faces, I knew their thoughts were the mirror of mine; what kind of witch was I going to be?
‘Don’t follow me,’ I managed to spit out before I stormed to the front door, flung it open and walked out into the heavy rain, which immediately soaked through my clothes, doing nothing to cool down the raging fire within me.
Chapter Six
I had no idea where I was going – all I knew was that I had to get as far away as possible from my parents. I’d always adored my parents, forever grateful for everything they did for me. But my trust in them, that unbreakable trust, had been shattered into a million pieces. What was left didn’t bear thinking about.
The rain eased at the same time that I began crying, really crying. I looked around, saw that I was down by the harbour. The abandoned boats rolled around in the swollen, stirred-up waters, and the halyards clattered against their masts. The storm had passed and was hovering somewhere out to sea.
The lights of a lone car shone in the distance, making my heart leap.
What if it’s my parents, or the special police?
Looking around for somewhere to hide, I spotted a boat at the far end of the mooring. I made a quick dash and slipped into the cockpit, where I pulled my knees to my chest and let out my anger, my shock and most of all, my bitter betrayal. Words that could not be held in slipped from my tongue, thick and fast, amidst my tears; words that told my story.
Finally, I was spent. I sat back and looked out over the black sea.
I am a witch.
The knowledge of what this would mean for me and my future hovered just beyond my reach. That’s when I heard it, the sound of shifting, moving fabric. I stood and faced the front of the boat.
‘Who’s there?’ I asked, my heart pounding.
No one replied, but I saw the form of someone sitting against the mast only metres away. I wanted to run like the wind, but what had they heard from my crazy mutterings? Who the hell was it?
I forced myself to move, step by step, until I was standing in front of them. The light from the moon shone through the clouds and there, fast asleep, was Ezra – the boy from school whom I’d spoken to once and spotted a handful of times, always surrounded by girls fawning over him.
I crouched down next to him. ‘Ezra, wake up,’ I said loudly.
Ezra opened his eyes and met mine. A look of recognition and complete understanding passed between us, back and forth, back and forth.
I sat down next to him and looked away, out to sea. ‘What are you doing here?’
‘I could ask you the same question,’ he replied. ‘Are…you okay?’
Am I okay?
How must I look? Saturated, with swollen eyes – a complete mess.
‘I’m fine.’
Ezra laughed, deep and husky. ‘You know what fine means, don’t you?’
‘I think I do,’ I said, laughing. ‘Honestly, I’m a complete mess.’
Why did I say that?
Ezra stopped laughing and when he spoke, his voice was kind and soft. ‘Care to talk about it?’
For some reason that I didn’t understand, I did want to talk about it. This boy I barely knew, I wanted to tell him everything. It felt right. But it was impossible. I could never talk to anyone except my family, and honestly, they were the last people I wanted to see.
‘I had a fight with my family,’ I said, wiping away the last of my tears.
‘Is that all?’
Why is he fishing? Does he know something? Has he already heard everything? CRAP! CRAP! CRAP!
My heart started to race, but I kept my voice even. ‘Nope.’
‘Don’t worry, I’m always fighting with my dad. He’s…impossible.’
I started to breathe again. Maybe he had been asleep.
‘That’s why I was out here tonight, actually. He can be so…controlling. Sometimes it’s just too much. So I snuck out, came here and fell asleep after that storm passed through. Until you woke me up, that is.’
‘Sorry about that. I didn’t know you were here. Gave myself a bit of a fright.’
‘I’m glad you woke me,’ he said, and I knew from the way he said it that he was smiling.
‘Your dad sounds like a jerk,’ I said.
Ezra laughed again, and it made my heart contract. ‘You hit the nail on the head. You have the same problem?’
Fishing again?
‘No, my parents aren’t normally so bad,’ I said, the red-hot-poker feeling finally dissipating.
‘Do they know where you are?’
‘No,’ I said, picturing them driving up and down the streets.
/>
‘They’ll be worried.’
‘Probably.’
Definitely.
‘Ready to go home?’
Am I? Am I ready to face them?
‘Honestly, I don’t know.’
‘Just sit with me a minute. Then I’ll take you home.’
Take me home?
I turned and looked at Ezra, who was now lying back on the deck, staring up at the sky. I lay beside him and followed his gaze, and there was a sky full of stars, twinkling fairy lights against the onyx sky.
‘It’s beautiful,’ I said, realising that I hadn’t looked at the stars – so bright here – since we moved.
‘It’s one of my favourite things to do,’ said Ezra. ‘Everything up there just seems so simple.’
He spoke so quietly and sadly that I couldn’t help but wonder what kind of life he had at home.
He pointed straight up. ‘Can you see that one? The brightest of them all?’
‘Yes,’ I said, realising that our bare arms were touching and a strange electricity danced between us.
‘The northern star.’
I sank back into myself and saw the world around me clearly. I felt the gentle lapping of the water rocking the boat, the cool breeze on my face and my body, the galaxy of golden stars above us. The boy next to me, someone I barely knew, spoke to my soul.
I am a witch.
The knowing of this settled within me like a spell, and the world looked different; I felt different, more like me.
Ezra turned and looked at me, his eyes like dark pools. ‘Don’t forget, if you are ever lost, follow the Northern Star – it will help you find your way home.’
We walked quickly along the streets, the pavement wet and shiny, reflecting the light of the moon that sat high in the sky. My anger was fizzling out and I felt cold and tired. All I wanted was to get home, climb into bed and drift into the oblivion of sleep.
The streets were dead. There wasn’t a single other soul out and about. Our breath sounded loud and our footsteps on the concrete, deafening. I turned my head left to right, scanning for signs of the special police. Ezra did the same, and I didn’t have to read his mind to know that he was looking for the same thing.
‘You should take off,’ I whispered. ‘I’ll be fine.’
‘I want to take you home,’ he said.
I didn’t have it in me to argue, so we continued on through the back streets. I had just started to relax when a car turned into the top of the street – its headlights seeking us like spotlights. Ezra grabbed my hand, sending a bolt of electricity through me, and we ran into the front yard of the nearest house and slipped down the side. There wasn’t much room and we squashed in together, my heart racing.
A dog from a neighbouring house started to bark, and a light from across the street flicked on.
‘It’s going to be okay, Eva,’ said Ezra, running his thumb across the top of my hand. He then took hold of my palm, sending my heart into a spin. The car was slow, so slow, as it made its way down the street towards us. I pictured my name on the clipboard of Officer McCann with a circle around it. A person of interest? Now a witch of interest.
What will they think if they find us together?
What will they do?
Just how much trouble will we be in?
And then the car passed us and I recognised the shape of my dad’s 4WD. Mum and Elijah were gazing out the open windows…looking for me.
‘It’s my family,’ I said. ‘I’d better go.’
Ezra smiled, pulling in one side of his mouth. ‘You take care, okay.’
‘You too,’ I said, letting go of his hand, the current between us breaking. We glanced down at our hands.
‘Better run. See you at school,’ I said.
The smile dropped from his face. ‘I hope so.’
I turned and ran back across the lawn and quickly caught up with the car. Mum and Elijah blinked a few times before all the lines etched on their faces disappeared and big smiles lit up their faces.
I climbed into the car beside Elijah, who hugged me tight.
‘Hey, I’m just a cub,’ I said, one of our shared jokes whenever he forgot how big and strong he was and hugged me too tightly.
He laughed and loosened his hold. I glanced out the window for one last glance at Ezra, but we were moving again, travelling quickly down the street. Elijah narrowed his eyes at me, but I turned away. For the first time, I didn’t want him to read my mind. I had no intention of telling him or anyone about meeting Ezra; he was my little secret.
Chapter Seven
The first thing I did when I woke in the morning was hide my family’s book on witchcraft under the loose floorboard I’d found on the day we moved in. I couldn’t risk my parents taking it away.
As I pulled the rug over that section of the floor, I thought back to the night before, when we’d gotten home. We’d all been too exhausted to say much, but after some hugs and apologies, we’d gone to bed. But there’d been one comment that sent warning signs flashing through my mind.
‘Well, now we can put all of this behind us,’ my mum had said as she hugged me.
My body had gone stiff, and I’d held onto the words that I wanted to hurl at her. Instead, I’d taken one long look at my mother, a witch like me, a witch in hiding, and walked up the stairs and hopped into bed.
I gazed out over the quiet street, bathed in the early-morning lilac light. I opened the windows and breathed in the cool, clean air. I’d never touched a drop of alcohol, but I imagined this was what it felt like to have a hangover. My head throbbed, my eyes burned and a bitter, sick feeling sat in the base of my stomach.
I turned back at my bed, which called to me, but I resisted. My thoughts, left alone for a day of incubation in bed, would be far worse than facing the day ahead. I slipped on my running gear, grabbed my earbuds and went downstairs.
‘Eva,’ said my mum as I reached the front door. I turned and there was Mum sitting in the kitchen to my left, a cup of steaming tea in front of her.
‘Just going for a run,’ I said.
‘Have you got a minute?’
‘Sure,’ I said, my voice as crisp as the morning that waited outside.
I sat down opposite Mum. She looked unhinged. Dark circles hugged her eyes, and her long dark hair, half-up, half-down, appeared tangled and messy. Her hands shook as she picked up her tea. For a moment I felt sorry for her. Then she spoke.
‘Darling, we need to talk about last night.’
I nodded, so many thoughts rushing into my head that no words would form.
‘I want to apologise for not telling you and Elijah sooner. You’re right, you both deserved to know.’
She took a sip of tea, and her eyes, the mirror of mine, found me. ‘But you must understand, we had our reasons.’
‘There are no reasons that make this okay, Mum. You must know that,’ I said, causing Mum’s eyes to open wider.
‘The life of a witch can be very dangerous. It’s not the life we wanted for you and Elijah.’
Here we go again!
When she spoke again, she chose her words carefully. ‘What you probably don’t understand is that yes, as a witch you can be in danger from those around you, but–’
‘But what?’
‘But, as a witch, it is you who can be a danger…to others.’
I sat back in my chair as my mum’s words sank in. I thought back to the night before when I was scared inside my own house. But really, Mum was telling me that I was the scariest thing inside my own home.
‘You don’t trust us, Mum? Is that what you’re saying?’
Mum’s pale face completely drained of colour. ‘No, that’s not it at all. It’s just that magic, well, magic makes you powerful. And power is its own form of danger.’
‘Can be its own form of danger,’ I said.
Mum blinked a few times and gazed down at her tea. ‘It’s hard to explain. You’re going to have to take my word for it.’
I knew when
Mum was trying to wrap up a conversation, and this was one of those times. ‘No, Mum, I’m not going to take your word for it. I intend to learn.’
Mum’s head snapped back up.
‘You heard me right. I’m a witch and I intend to learn how to become one.’
‘What? No!’
‘Do you know what? For the first time in my life, everything makes sense. I’ve been lost, Mum. Always looking for something that was impossible to find. And now I’ve found it. Right, wrong, dangerous or not, I don’t care. This is my choice.’
‘NO!’ said Mum, her word coming out like a hiss, and I wondered what kind of witch she was and who she was most afraid of.
‘It’s not up to you, Mum.’
‘Yes, actually, it is.’
Mum stood, her chair shooting backwards across the room. ‘You have no one to teach you. No way of learning.’
That’s when I knew I’d been right to hide the book away.
‘I’ll teach myself. I bet the rest of our family will teach me. Bet they always wanted to teach me.’
Mum turned away and I knew I was right. An old memory reformed, and I remembered being a young girl and my aunt Olive begging my mum to let me and Elijah learn. I had no idea at the time what they were talking about, but I did now.
‘We can’t move and we can’t travel, remember?’
I felt the heat arrive again. I gazed down at my hands, which felt as though they could burn. Witch’s hands. Maybe they could.
I stood, took a step back. ‘I will find a way.’
‘We live in unsafe times. Orpheus Blackthorn is a dangerous man, Eva. He’s showing all the character traits of a man our kind should fear. It’s not the right time.’
‘Don’t you see, it’s never going to be the right time – for you.’
Mum planted her hands on the kitchen table. ‘This conversation is over. You are never to talk about witchcraft again.’
I picked up my phone. ‘No, Mum, this conversation is not over. It’s only just begun.’
I turned around and left my mum standing there, her lips parted but no words coming out. A resolve like thick steel wrapped itself around me, and I knew there was no turning back now. I had already stepped inside the real me.