“Cut what out?” I ask him as innocently as I can muster.
“Stop looking at me like you could eat me up. Shit woman, it’s hard enough having to wait as it is, but when you look at me like that I want to forget about the promise I made to your brother.”
“That works for me,” I tell him while batting my eye lashes at him.
“Stop! We can’t Charlee girl, I’m a man of my word, you know this…we only have six more months and I can make you mine in every way known to man. Give it time, be patient, the buildup will make it well worth the wait.”
“I don’t want to wait anymore Country!” I don’t mean to shout at him, but a girl has needs, and I’m frustrated with having to wait for the all mighty Gunner to have any say in our relationship.
“I know it’s hard baby, but we can do this, and if you don’t like it, you can be the one to talk to your brother about it, I like my nuts right where they are, thank you very much.”
“Don’t be a pussy Country, this is about us not him.”
“What the fuck did you just call me?” I may have crossed a line with that one word. Oh well, what’s the worst that can happen, he’ll spank me—bring it on. I rather enjoy his hands on me, even if it is a form of keeping me in line.
“Drop it before you piss me off any more than you already have.” As if, doesn’t he know me at all yet? I don’t give up that easily. Never have and never will, I enjoy a challenge, and he’s just issued me one. Feeling bold I walk over to him and stand in front of him, I lean up on my tiptoes and lay a sweet closed mouth kiss to his lips than move down his jaw laying several more kisses along the way. He groans out and lifts his head up for me to have better access to his neck. Good to know that his is an erogenous zone for him and I submit this to my memory bank for future endeavors.
“Charlee girl please,” he says as he moves and slams his lips down onto mine.
“There are still things we can do Country.” I want to do more.
“What kind of things were you thinking Charlee girl?”
“That we can still explore each other’s bodies without having intercourse.”
“You’re killing me here…we can’t get naked, you’ll be signing my death certificate if we do.”
“This is ridiculous Country, I want to feel your hands on my naked body, I want to explore yours. As long as we don’t have penetration I don’t see what the issue is!” I’m riled up now.
He hugs me close to him and whispers in my ear, “We can still make out Charlee girl, we can explore over clothes. That’s as far as I’m willing to take this until you turn seventeen.”
“Errr…” I growl out, he’s not having the reaction I was going for.
“I can still touch you, I can still feel you, I can still make you feel good.” He’s moved to my neck and is kissing and licking me there which gives me whole body shivers.
“Please…” I whimper out, I feel like a damn dog in heat.
He starts kissing me and walks me backwards to the bed. He leans over me forcing me to lay down with him hovering over me, he stops kissing me and starts licking and nipping at my skin starting at my ear and working his way down my throat and he stops at my collar bone.
“Charlee girl, can I kiss you and feel you everywhere?”
“Yes,” is the only word I seem capable of at this time, then a thought occurs to me, “still only over clothing?”
“Over clothing, yes,” is all he says as he licks over where my nipple is, even though there is an obstacle in the way I still feel every aspect of what he’s doing to me. My body is craving his even more than normal, I want him in ways a woman desires her man.
“I need more,” I tell him, “I need something.” Unsure of what that is I’m hoping he can figure it out for me. He takes his right hand and runs it down my left side, he ends up between the juncture of my thighs. Right there, yes that’s where I need more. He runs his hand up and down my covered slit, adding pressure where I can feel it all the way down to my toes. I feel my back arch as I reach for more, for something I’m not quite sure of, I’ve never experienced or felt anything like this in my life. My body starts shaking and I am finding it hard to breathe, “What’s happening to me?”
“Don’t try to fight it, let your body do what it’s meant to, let go Charlee girl.” It’s as if he’s put some type of spell on my body because the second the last word leaves his lips I feel an explosion that begins in my middle and works its way throughout my body. Stars explode behind my eyelids and I can’t help the scream of his name as it leaves my lips. “That’s it Charlee girl, just like that, let go, I’ve got you.” What feels like hours later but I’m sure is only moments I come back to reality and feel cocooned in his arms. His arms have become a safety net for my body as of late, and this time is no different. “Go to sleep, when you wake up I’ll still be here, and you’ll still be lying in my arms.” That’s the last thing I remember as my eyes close and darkness takes over.
The next morning, I awake with a startle, the sun is blinding me, but what really caught me off guard was the strong arms wrapped around my body and the heat coming from him. Winter time is going to be nice if he puts off this much warmth, now that I’ve slept in his arms all night, I never want to experience a night without him wrapped around me like this. My stirring must’ve woken him up because I can feel him beginning to wake up.
“Good morning, how’d you sleep last night?”
“Better than I have in my entire life.”
“Me too baby, I’ve never slept so soundly.”
“Guess that means we need to make this a permanent thing then,” I say shrugging my shoulders as I act innocent, hoping it will cause him to agree. Women get away with a lot of things with men that they wouldn’t normally, if you act young, naive and have an air of innocence about you.
“You really want that?”
“Yes, I absolutely want that.”
“Well that’s one thing I can give you, so yeah, let’s make it a permanent thing. Going to sleep and waking up in each other’s arms, what else could a guy ask for?” I could think of a few things, but it seems like I’m going to have to break down his resolve. “I’m gonna take a shower since I went to bed without taking one after my workout last night,” he says as he gets off the bed and goes to his bag to retrieve some clothes. It amazes me that watching him do such menial tasks heightens my libido the way it does. Oh yeah, I must break down those walls that seem so impenetrable.
“Sounds good, I’m going to go take a shower myself, I’ll meet you in the kitchen for breakfast.”
“Sounds like a plan, I’ll meet you in a few,” he says as he walks out the door and heads to the bathroom in the hallway. I take a minute and stretch out my limbs before I finally force myself out of the bed that smells like him and head to my room to get ready for the day ahead.
As I’m getting dressed after my shower I can’t help but to think back to last night and how amazing it was to watch her fall apart from the things my mouth and hands were doing to her. She’s so beautiful when she falls apart, I want to see that look on her face every day for the rest of our lives. I hear banging from the kitchen and smile at the thought that she must’ve rushed through her routine to see me faster, and knowing that she’s making me breakfast pulls at something deep inside of me that I thought had been buried a long time ago, courtesy of my mother. “Just a few more months to go Country,” I remind myself, I can’t wait until that day comes. It can’t come fast enough for either of us if last night is proof of anything, it’s of that.
I head into the kitchen where I see my girl and Cam in a standoff…what in the hell have I walked in on, and should I turn around and walk right back out? Lord only knows I don’t want to get dragged into any female drama this early in the morning.
“Tell me,” Cam says to her.
“I can’t, not yet anyways. I’ve already told you that, when I can I promise I will,” Charlee tells Cam, and I can’t help but feel sorry for my girl and
her friend with the position they find themselves in.
“You tell me everything!” Cam screams out at her, but that’s as far as this is going.
“Enough!” I scream out at her, “she can’t tell you, at least not yet, this isn’t anything personal.”
“Isn’t it though?” Cam asks me, and I can tell by the tone of her voice that she is seriously taking this as an attack on her person and status on her place in this family. The thing is she isn’t club family, she’s more of a personal family and this thing going on is only being kept within our club’s four walls so to speak.
“No, it’s not and if anything leaks, or gets out it’s Charlee who will suffer, not you, not me but her. Think about that before you get all butt hurt over there, Cam. This isn’t a game of who loves who more, it isn’t about keeping you out of the loop, it’s about keeping her here and out of the system. There’s something big at play here, and instead of jumping down her throat or running the Spanish inquisition on her, be the friend that you are and stand behind her and support her through this. When the time comes, you’ll know.”
“I love you Cam, you’re my best friend. This is hard for me not to tell you, to talk to you about, but I just can’t right now, please understand and don’t be mad at me.”
“I’m not mad at you Charlee, I’m worried and scared,” Cam tells her, and I can see the tears forming in her eyes, she’s doing a damn good job of holding them back. I watch as Charlee embraces her friend, and I hope that Cam will let it drop now, when the time is right, and we know what’s going on, I’ll personally tell her if Charlee doesn’t. Which as thick as these girls are, I don’t see that happening, I can see how it’s under my girl’s skin that she can’t share with her best friend.
After we have a hearty breakfast, I excuse myself to my room and let them have some girl time, I have presents to wrap…Christmas is only a couple of days away.
Christmas Day
It’s Christmas Day…I didn’t sleep a wink last night, I’ve never been able to since I was little. Gunner came over to stay and help celebrate. It was him, Country, Cam and myself—we made hot chocolate with whipped cream and I crushed some peppermints on top. We sat in the living room, watched Christmas movies all night and opened our traditional pj’s, we even included Country and Cameron and they were shocked to get theirs. I guess they weren’t expecting it, but it’s tradition and I wasn’t going to leave them out. Ma has always bought us pj’s that we’d open Christmas Eve, she liked us to have new outfits for pictures as we opened up gifts the next morning.
I know I’m up before anyone else in the house, Gunner stayed over and slept on the couch, he didn’t want to miss Christmas Day with me, he wanted me to have my family here and together…what’s left of it anyways. Having Cameron and Country here helps me forget what I’m truly missing, my ma and pops. We’re having dinner at the clubhouse today, so I don’t have to worry about cooking, the old ladies are taking care of that. One less thing for me to stress over, and I say hallelujah to that. I love to cook, but this year cooking a big dinner just isn’t appealing to me. Since I know I’ll be in pictures, I get up and primp myself so when I look back I won’t be wondering what I was thinking allowing myself to be captured this way.
I go to the bathroom, brush my hair and my teeth and decide against too much makeup. I just apply eye liner, throw some mascara on and call it good enough. At least I’ll resemble a living person instead of a walking, talking zombie. I hear Cameron waking up, since Gunner was here last night Country and I decided to sleep in our own assigned rooms. It’s better not to push our preferred sleeping arrangements on my brother—just yet. My brother can be cantankerous at times, and I’d prefer to enjoy my holiday instead of fighting with him.
When I get in the room I see Cameron making her bed, when she finally realizes I’m out, she rushes past me and into the bathroom…guess I was in there longer than I thought. It isn’t easy for two girls to share a room let alone a bathroom, we take longer to prepare for our days and sometimes we’re stepping on each other’s toes. Men are so simple, shower, shit and shave and they’re done…we have to do those things plus our hair and make-up, hence the taking longer bit which men don’t seem to understand. I go over and make my bed and once finished, I grab my house shoes and head out of the room to start breakfast before the guys wake up.
I decide on something quick and easy, not to mention gooey goodness…cinnamon rolls and coffee sounds like a great breakfast. It will curb Country’s sweet tooth and will give us all a sugar rush to begin our day. I don’t feel like standing over the stove making a huge meal for everyone, and since no one is up there’s no one to argue with me over it. I get them on the pan and place them in the oven, as soon as the door closes I see a shadow in the kitchen doorway. I look up and over to see who is up to grace me with their presence and I see Gunner. He’s smiling at me and I return his smile, he opens his arms to me and I rush into his arms. I don’t know what comes over me, but I begin to cry, I’m not that girl, so this takes not only me by surprise but him as well.
“It’s gonna be alright Twerp, I promise you I will get this figured out.”
“I know you will, I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me.”
“There’s a lot happening at one time, I get it, if anyone understands where you’re coming from its me.” And I know he’s right, he holds it in better than I do, but he feels their loss just as deeply as I do.
“I have cinnamon rolls in the oven and was just fixing to start a pot of coffee. Why don’t you go wake up Country for me so it’s nice and warm when he joins us?” He lets me out of his arms and I feel the loss of his warm embrace, there’s nothing like having your big brother hold you in his arms to make you feel safe and like everything’s going to be okay.
“Will do it for you, but he should be up and about like the rest of us.” He winks at me letting me know he’s teasing me. I love my brother!
I hate that my sister is having to grow up so quickly, she deserves to be a teenager. Instead she’s up making breakfast, taking care of everyone including herself and she shouldn’t have to. She should be enjoying life to the fullest the same way that I did, I don’t want to be a parent to her which is why I’ve backed off considerably, I trust Country with her. I know how much he loves her, it both worries me and brings me comfort at the same time. I know the time is coming where he can officially claim her as his, but I hope the next couple of months drag on…I’m not ready to know that they’re doing those kinds of things.
As I’m walking down the hall I run head first into Cameron, God she’s so beautiful, it hurts my heart to know that I’ll never be able to make her mine. She’s too young, too gullible, not to mention she thinks she’s in love with her boyfriend. There’s something about Jamie I can’t put my finger on, but I will figure it out, there’s no way in hell I’ll allow him to hurt her if I can prevent it from happening. She may not be physically mine, but emotionally, to me she is—but I still have to keep my boundaries up. I can’t give her false hope on something that will never happen.
“I’m so sorry Gunner, I was trying to hurry up to help Charlee and I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”
“No worries sweetheart, she’s in the kitchen. Breakfast is on, and coffee is brewing, go help yourself.” As if I have to give her permission to have breakfast, I’m a damn fool sometimes.
“Thanks,” she says as she goes around me, I don’t move like the chump I am, instead I stand in the hallway and watch her walk down it toward the kitchen. God she’s got such a great ass! Remembering what it was I am supposed to be doing I head to my old bedroom and knock on the door. “Country, rise and shine motherfucker, the girls are waitin’ on us.”
“Tell them to hold their damn horses, I’m coming.”
“Don’t make them wait too long man, it’s not pretty when they’re waiting to open up gifts.” I chuckle at my statement knowing I’m not lying, those girls love getting presents. Walking back u
p the hallway I overhear their conversation and what I hear doesn’t make me happy.
“Jamie won’t talk to me, he’s really mad at me,” I hear Cameron tell my sister.
“Why? Because you didn’t go home with him for the holiday?”
“I guess, but I thought we’d talked that out, he’s being meaner than usual.”
“What do you mean meaner than usual? I didn’t know he was being rude to you.”
“He’s just stressed out because of exams and stuff, no biggie, I don’t know why I even said anything.”
“You said something because you need to talk about it, I’m here Cameron, just because you think I’m holding back on you I’m not. I promise, as soon as I have the go ahead you’re going to have your hands full with what I have to tell you.”
“I know you don’t like keeping things from me Charlee, it just hurts because I thought ya’ll considered me family too. I’ll be alright, and I’ll be here whenever you need to tell me about it.” It breaks my heart to know that’s how she’s feeling, it was voted on though so there’s no way around that to tell her what’s going on in the family. She is family, always has been and always will be one way or the other.
Charlee's Choices: DreamCatcher MC Page 9