“Actually, I was looking for Winston,” I say, sliding down into one of the hard metal chairs that sit opposite the desk.
“You just missed him. He went to lunch with Stella but should be back in about an hour. Anything I can help you with?”
“Well,” I clear my throat. “Actually there is. I was going to have this conversation with Winston first, but I guess it can wait until he’s back.”
“Well, what is it, son? Everything okay with you?” Harold leans back in his chair, crossing his arms in front of his chest.
The sounds of the car shop filter in through the open door and for a moment I consider closing it to give us a little more privacy. Then I decide it might be better to keep it open in case he reacts badly to what I’m about to say.
“Yeah, everything is fine. It’s just...” I take a deep inhale and blow it out slowly. “I just wanted to come here and let you know that I like your daughter. More than like, actually. I’m falling pretty hard for her. And I want to let everyone know that we have decided to officially be together,” I force the words out so quickly they all end up running together.
I brace myself for whatever reaction he might throw my way, mentally trying to prepare myself for any outcome.
When a slow smile moves across his mouth, I’m not sure what to make of it. But then he tilts his head back and lets out a full belly laugh – one that bounces off the walls around us.
“Well hot damn.” He smacks the desk in front of him excitedly. “That’s the best news I’ve heard in some time.”
“It is?” I openly gawk at him. Sure he must be losing his damn mind.
“Of course it is.”
“Sir, I...”
“Let me guess. You thought I’d be upset?”
“Truthfully, yeah. I guess I did.” I let my shoulders sag forward.
“And why would you think that, Miles? Why would you ever think I’d be anything short of ecstatic?”
“Well, honestly, because I think she can do better, and I think you know she can too.”
“Son, they don’t get much better than you.”
“I’m going to have to disagree with you there, Harold.” I shake my head, knowing he would disagree too if he truly knew the person I am.
Harold knew me as a child, and even though I came back from the military a much different person, I allowed him to believe I was still the guy his son grew up with. Obviously, he could see some of the changes in me, everyone could. There were simply some things I could not cover up. But eventually I got better at hiding those parts of me, and now it’s almost like second nature. Like hiding behind this fake façade is who I am now.
Except with Harlow. She’s the only one that makes me feel real. The only one that makes me feel safe. The only one I don’t try to hide from. Then again, that’s not entirely true either. Because I’m still hiding one of the most significant parts of myself – even from her.
I keep saying I’ll tell her eventually and I will, but the truth is, Harlow and I are still so new and laying something like that on her right out of the gate is a sure fire way to ensure this relationship goes nowhere. And I want it to go somewhere. As shocked as I am to admit that to myself, I really do.
In just a few short weeks’ time, Harlow has changed my entire life. I went from barely existing, having to force myself through every second, to looking forward to what the day will bring, and the next day, and the day after that.
The future.
It’s something I haven’t really thought about in years.
“You just told me that a man I love and respect is going to be taking care of my little girl.” Harold’s response breaks into my thoughts, as he leans forward to place his elbows on the desk in front of him. “Why would I be anything but over the moon right now?”
“So you’re okay with this?” I question again, needing additional confirmation even though he’s done nothing but give me just that since I told him about my feelings for Harlow.
“I’m more than okay with it.” He smiles. “You know you’re like a son to me, Miles. And I know how hard of a time you’ve had these past few years. You deserve to be happy, and so does Harlow. If you two can find that together, then even better.”
“Thanks, Harold.” I let out a breath and release some of the tension in my back by resting it against the back of the chair.
“Now let’s hope Winston will be as accepting as you are.” I look up and meet his gaze.
“He’s Winston.” He swipes his hand through the air. “Even if he doesn’t like it at first he’ll get over it.”
“Get over what?” Winston suddenly appears in the doorway, his gaze bouncing from his father, to me, and then back to his father.
“I thought you were at lunch.” Harold looks at his son.
“Left my wallet.” He shrugs, crossing toward the large filing cabinet at the back of the office. Pulling open the top drawer, he reaches inside, retrieves his wallet, and shoves it in his back pocket before turning back toward me. “What’s up? Why are you here?”
“Miles just came by to talk,” Harold says, standing from his chair. “I’m going to go check on the boys. See if anyone needs anything.” He gives me a wink and quickly slides out of the office without another word.
“What the hell was that about?” Winston gestures toward the door of the office. “Is it just me or is he acting kind of weird?”
“I don’t think he’s acting weird,” I disagree. “Is Stella downstairs waiting on you or do you have a minute to talk?” I ask, feeling my earlier tension and nerves as they return in full force.
“She’s waiting, but I can give you a minute.” He snags the chair next to me, angling it in my direction before taking a seat. “What’s up?”
“Okay, so before I say anything, I need you to know that you’re like a brother to me and I would never do anything to jeopardize that.”
“Shit. This must be bad. What the fuck did you do?” He sighs, adjusting the ball cap on his head.
“You’re probably going to be pissed.” I try my best to prepare him.
“Dude, spit it out already. The way you’re acting I’m gonna start thinking the worst. Like you’re fucking my sister or something,” he blurts. The smile that appears on his face instantly falls when he catches my expression. “No?” He sits up straighter. “No fucking way.” He shakes his head slowly from side to side.
“I think I’m in love with her, man,” I admit, watching his eyes widen even further.
“What the fuck?” He looks at me like he has no idea who I am, but oddly enough there’s not a hint of anger in his voice. Confusion, definitely, but no anger. “Is that what you were in here talking to Dad about? Did you tell him too?”
I nod slowly. “I did.”
“And what did he have to say?”
“He’s happy for us.”
“Happy for you.” Winston snorts. “Of course he’s happy for you. Because if Harlow’s with you then he doesn’t have to worry about her leaving home again.”
I try not to take offense to his statement, knowing I’ve really caught him off guard.
“Look, I didn’t plan for this. I was just trying to help her out by giving her a job. I didn’t know working with her every day would lead to this. It just happened.”
“How long?” he cuts me off.
“Around a month.”
“A month?” He stands, shoving the chair backward. “And you just conveniently forgot to tell me? Like that’s not information, I need to know?” Hurt masked as anger covers his face and I quickly move to explain.
“I didn’t know it would turn into this. I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it by telling everyone until I knew for sure.”
“Knew what?”
“That I wanted to be with her.”
“So you fucked her but didn’t know if you wanted to be with her, but now you do know so you’re coming clean to something you should have told me a month ago.”
“It wasn’t like that
, Winst. I swear. Man, it just happened so fucking fast, and I was trying to process it all. You know how I am.” I push to a stand, turning to face him head-on.
“Yeah, you’re right. I do know how you are. Meaning, I know how quickly you move through women.”
“Harlow isn’t like any of those other women, Winston. The fact that I’m telling you I’m in love with her should speak for itself. When have I ever said that to you about someone?”
“Does she know?” His voice levels out.
“Know what?”
“That you’re in love with her?”
“Not yet.” I shake my head.
“And why is that?”
“Because I don’t think she’s ready to hear it.”
“You don’t think she’s ready to hear it or you’re not ready to say it?” he questions.
“Maybe a little bit of both,” I admit truthfully. “But it doesn’t make it any less true.”
“I should have known something was up. That day when I walked into your office, and she was with you. I should have seen it right then. I guess maybe I didn’t want to see it. I didn’t want to believe my best friend and my sister would be stupid enough to get involved with each other.” He lets out a loud breath. “I don’t know, man. I just don’t know.” He shifts his weight from side to side. “Does she know about what happened overseas? Does she have any clue what she’s actually signing up for with you?”
I draw back slightly, a little caught off guard that he would throw my past up at me like that.
“She knows some things.”
“Some, but not all,” he says condescendingly.
Anger boils in my chest, and I have to fight the urge to lash back at him. Pulling in a deep breath through my nose, I let it out slowly before allowing myself to reply.
“I know what you’re thinking, Winst. But I’m telling you, it’s different with Harlow. I’m different. She makes me want to be better. She makes me want more for myself. She makes me forget...” I leave the statement hanging.
“Fuck,” he grumbles, shoving his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. “She needs to know everything, Miles.”
“She will. It’s just going to take me a while to work my way up to that.”
He nods. “And what about Alan?”
“What about Alan?”
“You realize she’s still married, right?”
“I’m not a fucking idiot,” I grind out. “I realize that she is technically still married, but we both know that won’t be the case in a couple of weeks.” I pause, trying to calm my voice. “I know your real issue here is that I didn’t tell you sooner, and I’m really sorry about that. I guess I just didn’t know how. If I could go back, I’d do it differently.”
After a long pause, he says, “You’re going to hurt her.” It’s not even a question.
“I won’t,” I insist.
“You will. And when you do, and I’m forced to choose between the two of you, I’ll choose her.”
“I wouldn’t expect anything less.”
“I don’t like it.” Winston’s gaze finally comes back to mine. “I don’t like it even a little bit. But on the off chance that you can make each other happy, I won’t stand in your way either.”
“I appreciate that,” I tell him, not really sure what else to say.
“I gotta get back to Stella.” He turns and starts for the door.
“Hey, Winston,” I call, waiting until he turns back toward me before continuing, “Are we good?”
“I guess.” He shrugs unconvincingly.
“For what it’s worth, I really do love her,” I tell him in a last ditch effort to try and make him understand.
“Let’s hope for all our sakes that ends up being enough.” With that, he turns and disappears from the office.
——
“Hey.” The moment Harlow’s voice comes on the line I instantly relax. It’s crazy how just hearing her say something as simple as “hello” brings a smile to my face despite the day I’ve had.
“Hey,” I return. “What are you doing right now?” I ask.
“As in right this second?”
“As in right this second.”
“I’m actually just getting ready to leave the shop. Why what’s up?”
“Stay put. I’m coming to get you,” I say, sliding onto my motorcycle.
“And where are you taking me once you get me?” I can hear the smile in her voice.
“I haven’t decided yet. I’m in the mood for a ride.”
“Everything okay?” Her voice dips.
“Yeah, it will be.” I let out a slow breath.
“I don’t know that I like the sound of that.” I hear her shuffling papers in the background. “What’s going on?”
“I’m leaving your Dad’s shop.”
“Why are you at Dad’s shop?” she asks
“I did it.”
“You did it,” she echoes. “As in you told them?”
“I did. I talked to both your father and Winston.”
“Oh god. Do I even want to know how it went?” she asks nervously.
“Your dad was surprisingly very supportive. Winston on the other hand...”
“Is he mad?”
“I don’t know if I’d say mad. I think he’s a little hurt that we kept it from him. And he’s worried about you.”
“Worried about me? Why?”
“I’ll tell you everything when I pick you up.”
“Okay.” She lets out a slow breath. “I guess it’s a good thing I have actual shoes on today,” she says, knowing I won’t put her on my bike in those damn strappy things she wears all the time.
“I guess so.” I fire my bike up, feeling the rumble beneath me. “I’ll be there in about fifteen.”
“I’ll be ready.”
Chapter Twenty-two
Harlow
I tighten my grip around Miles’ waist as he guides the motorcycle from side to side down a narrow and curvy road.
I have no idea where he’s taking us. If I had to guess I’d say we’ve been driving for at least an hour. I stopped recognizing my surroundings when he exited the freeway quite some time ago.
All I know is we’re somewhere north of Cincinnati in a very rural area. And while I’m still getting used to being on the back of a motorcycle, I’m rather enjoying the peaceful ride. Something tells me Miles really needed it.
He was quiet when he picked me up. He smiled and kissed me and tried to seem normal, but I could tell that whatever Winston said to him struck him hard. Even though I wanted to demand that he tell me everything the moment he picked me up, I knew he probably needed some time to digest everything.
Knowing my brother, he didn’t make it easy on Miles. The last thing I want to do is add to that. I want to be the person that makes him feel better – not worse.
Miles turns down a side street and takes us through a heavily wooded area. After a few moments, the trees open up to a reveal a beautiful lake stretched out in front of us. Pulling the bike into a near-vacant lot nestled between two large patches of trees, he snags the far left spot and kills the engine.
I slide off the back, using his shoulders to leverage myself up and over before quickly removing the helmet Miles purchased for me last week.
“Where are we?” I ask as Miles takes off his own helmet.
“Cowan Lake.” He drops the kickstand before climbing off the motorcycle.
“I know this place,” I say, the name a familiar one from my childhood. “We used to camp here when we were kids,” I say, looking out over the water.
“Yep,” he confirms, setting his helmet on top of the seat before taking mine and resting it next to his.
“I haven’t been here in years.” I pause, turning my gaze to the side when he steps up next to me and looks out over the water. “Is there a reason you brought us all the way out here?”
He shrugs. “I thought it would be nice to get away from the city for a while.”
“
I wish I would have known this was where we were coming. I would have brought a swimsuit.”
“For what I’ve got planned, you won’t need one. Come on.” He grabs my hand and pulls me toward the concrete walkway that leads down to the water.
There are several boats already out and one that’s backed into the boat ramp being loaded into the water as we approach the dock.
“Hey, Preach.” Miles greets the guy currently unstrapping the boat from the trailer. He’s a middle-aged man, maybe late thirties, with thick dark hair and wire-rimmed glasses.
“Miles Hollins.” He grins wide, taking the hand that Miles extends. “I gotta say I was surprised as hell to get your call. It’s been what, two years?”
“Probably close to that,” Miles agrees. “I appreciate you hooking me up on such short notice.”
“Anything for one of my brothers.”
“You two served together?” I interrupt, bringing both sets of eyes to me.
“We were stationed together in Hawaii for our first assignment,” Miles tells me, squeezing my hand.
“Charles Wilson, but all the guys like to call me Preach.”
“He liked to give little sermons every Sunday morning. Hence the name Preach,” Miles informs me.
“My dad is a preacher. What can I say? It runs in my blood.”
“Well, it’s nice to meet you, Preach. I’m Harlow.” I smile with a nod.
“She’s a pretty one,” he tells Miles, throwing me a side wink.
“That she is,” Miles agrees, bumping his shoulder gently against mine. “Is she about ready?” he asks, turning his gaze to the small white boat with a thick blue stripe down the side.
“All gassed and ready to go.”
“How much do I owe you?” Miles asks, reaching for his wallet. Preach holds his hands up to stop him.
“Not a chance, man,” he says, shaking his head.
“At least let me pay you for the gas,” Miles insists.
“Nope.” He smiles.
“I don’t feel right not giving you anything.” Miles pulls out his wallet despite his friend’s insistence.
“Tell you what, if I ever get my ass to Cincy, you can hook me up with a tattoo.”
“You’ve got yourself a deal.” Miles chuckles, shoving his wallet back into the rear pocket of his dark blue jeans.
All That We Are Page 16