A Tangle in the Vines

by Anna Celeste Burke

  “Ooh, that’s a good line. Are you getting all this, Julie?” Zelda asked.

  “How could I miss it?”

  “Let’s all take a breath and calm down,” Austin pleaded. “We’re tired and horrified by what we’ve witnessed out there. Before you two challenge each other to mudwrestling in the slime pit, let’s end this.” Zelda’s head whipped around to catch Julie’s eye.

  “I’ve got it. Mudwrestling. Slime pit,” Julie said and then she yawned. “Another rewrite coming up, but we’ve already got three dead bodies in the slime pit. We don’t need anymore!”

  “Three? Where’d you get that? I count four, so far,” Ben commented. A silence fell upon us. “And, I might add, our night is far from over.”

  “That’s true, but for now, get a bite print from Marlowe, okay?” Austin asked Ben. “Since the Sheriff’s Department asked for our assistance, Rikki’s going to be here shortly. She’d like to send out an alert with a copy of that print ASAP. If some guy turns up in an ER with a dog bite, the doctors can use the print to see if it’s a match.”

  “Will do. If someone can help me with the wee doggie, I can swab and print him, and then we can, indeed, get out of here.”

  “Marlowe trusts me,” Julie said, yawning again. “I’ll hold him so his momma, and everyone else can go clean up.”

  “Thanks, Julie.” I said as Judy handed me the homemade goop that I prayed would get rid of the stench.

  “Don’t leave it on your hair too long, or you’ll come out of this a blond,” Zelda warned. I nodded and tried to make my escape when Dahlia opened her mouth again.

  “Wait a second, Bag Lady.” I stopped so fast, my plastic-covered feet squeaked on the tile floor.

  “Oh, no, you did not just say that, did you, Police Lady? Not after the hunky good cop told you to play nice.” My petite, hot-headed friend had balled up her hands into fists. The heck with mudwrestling in the slime pit. Zelda was preparing for a takedown right here and now. I’d make it a tag team event, except that I was too tired to drag this out any longer.

  “It’s okay, Zelda. I can handle the Police Lady.” In that instant, I’d figured out exactly how to fix Dahlia’s wagon. It had finally dawned on me who Aunt Lettie had been speaking to the night I overhead part of her telephone conversation about Penney Lincoln. The man on the phone with her was still around, and he could cause trouble for Dahlia if I complained to him. “The rest of you can leave for a soak in a tub or a shower after busting your behinds to save the theater building.”

  “Thank goodness,” Melody said, hugging Darjeeling as she and Carrie left the kitchen. Zelda shuffled off more slowly, staring over her shoulder at Dahlia, as she remained a few steps behind them. Even after they were out of sight, I could tell they were in the hallway listening.

  “Ben, get the evidence you need from Marlowe so you can go back to doing police work without being chewed out because your boss is annoyed with me.” He nodded and very efficiently swabbed Marlowe’s teeth and gums and took an imprint of his bite.

  “Austin, thank you for your help. I hope when Rikki gets here, instead of being a heartless shrew, she’ll suggest you go home, take a shower, and get some sleep.”

  “As for you, Dahlia—I’ll keep it simple. Go.”

  “Look that Bag Lady comment was unnecessary, Lily.”

  “Ignorant and insensitive, too,” Zelda said in a voice that carried from where she stood in the hall.

  “I admit it could have sounded like that,” Dahlia replied, “although I meant it in a teasing way.” My friends responded with a chorus of harrumphs as Ben packed up and headed for the backdoor, taking that orange bag with him. As soon as he stepped outside, Dahlia continued. “I’m creeped out by the idea that a serial killer is on the loose, and that he’s killed people I know—or think I know. Not just Penney Lincoln, but, off the record, I’m almost certain his latest victim is a woman who works at the school my brother’s kids attend.”

  I nodded in response to what Dahlia had just said. I could understand. I sighed and spoke in a more conciliatory manner.

  “This has been hard for us all, Dahlia. I’m running on empty, and I’ve got a short fuse. Can we say goodnight and start over tomorrow? I don’t really want to answer questions or dwell on the fact that a psycho serial killer was inches away from me before Marlowe ran him off.”

  “It’s a deal. That’s what I was going to suggest when I stopped you. I apologize for doing it in a nasty way. Let’s talk in the morning.”

  “Sure, we’ll have coffee waiting,” I said as she shuffled out the door. When the door shut behind her, it’s as if the oxygen had returned to the room and I could breathe again.

  “Judy, do you want me to drive you home?” Austin asked, knowing full well she was still in earshot.

  “Nah, sweetie,” Judy said as she stepped back into the kitchen from around the corner in the hallway. “I planned to stay overnight so we could work late on the play and get an early start again tomorrow. There’s no reason for you to drive all the way home either. I can bunk with Lily, and you take Lettie’s suite.” Then she looked at me.

  “It’s not safe, is it, Lily? You tell him.”

  “No, it’s not. Judy’s right. Whenever Rikki gets here, if she doesn’t send you on an assignment as far away from this place as she can, grab your ‘go bag’ and come on back. You’ve got a key and the security code, so let yourself in and make yourself comfortable.”

  “Thanks. I’m too exhausted to argue. You sure must have confidence in that potion you made for Lily if you’re going to share her room.” He smiled at Judy. Even with a weary, dirty face, his smile can lift me right out of my shoes—when I’m wearing them. “Rikki definitely needs me on this. I’ll fill you both in tomorrow.”

  “Me too!” I shook my head as Zelda waltzed back into the room. “We gotta figure out what we’re up against to get our play ready. What’s a ‘go bag?’”

  “You can’t leave me out, either—I’m the writer, remember?” Julie added as she stepped into the room. Little Marlowe, who’d fallen asleep in her arms, yawned. Our writer answered Zelda’s question. “A ‘go bag’ is a pack of essentials guys like Austin keep with them since they never know when they’re going to have to run for it.”

  “Like underwear and a clean shirt?” Zelda asked.

  “Yeah. A gun, cash, and a passport too, maybe,” Julie added as Marlowe woofed. “He gets it.”

  Melody and Carrie had also come back into the kitchen. They just stood there with steely gazes fixed on Austin, not saying a word. Austin held up both hands in surrender.

  “I know when I’m outnumbered. Have it your way—breakfast and an update from the slime pit. Yum!” He glanced at his phone as it pinged almost in sync with a knock on the door. “Rikki’s here.”

  “What do you mean ‘here?’” I asked. Too late. Austin opened the door and Rikki walked in. She wrinkled her nose at the lingering Eau du Decomp. Then she caught sight of me.

  “A homemade hazmat suit—put into use after the fact, so I’ve been told. It’s creative, I’ll give you that.” Rikki was wearing the real deal. “You should crack some windows to get a cross-breeze and clear the air in here.”

  I stood there, not sure how to respond in my mortified state. It didn’t matter because Rikki wasn’t done talking. The consummate professional, her demeanor was serious without being officious. There wasn’t a hint of derision or disdain in her manner. In fact, she paid us a compliment.

  “You all have handled this situation remarkably well. I’m not just talking about Austin, either, although it’s lucky for us that he was here. I’m going to sit in when you give your statements to Dahlia in the morning if that’s okay with you.”

  “Of course,” I said. What else could I say? I felt less like a jinx after hearing her comment about Austin’s presence being lucky.

  “It’s gonna be a full house,” Judy muttered as she opened the window above the sink about an inch.

  “We’l
l set up in the dining room,” I replied with a pasted smile on my face. “See you around eight if that’s okay.”

  “That’s great. Don’t knock yourself out. Good strong coffee will keep us going,” she said before turning to Austin.

  “I need to debrief with you, then you can clear out. I’d like you to join Dahlia and me in the morning. Once she gets everyone’s statements, we can figure out who’s going to do what. There’s a ton of work to be done with four murders to investigate.” She dropped her voice as she finished the sentence.

  “Sit down and talk in here where it’s dry. None of us has had a chance to get cleaned up, so we’ll leave you alone. Help yourselves to water or a cold drink from the fridge.” The others filed out as I said that. “I’m going to excuse myself. Good to see you, Rikki,” I said with as much dignity as I could muster wearing garbage bags and stinking to high heaven. Judy handed me another trash bag to dispose of my Slimy Chic outfit. Bag Lady was about right.

  ~~~~~

  I had to shower three times before I felt clean enough to go to bed. I’d poured all sorts of shampoos and conditioners into my hair. After using the skunk odor remover, I needed something to get rid of the smell it left on my hair. By the time I finished getting cleaned up and put on the softest pair of pajamas I own, Judy was out cold.

  I slipped through the French doors leading out onto the balcony. The rain had all but stopped, and the moon peeked through the clouds. My suite is on the second floor of the sprawling Santa Barbara style house. I have a great view from here of the entire vineyard, the theater surrounded by trees, and the winery across the road. When the clouds parted, the full moon made some of those features visible.

  Tonight, the lights around the theater were on. I could see the tented area set up around the slime pit. The tent was lit up, too, casting eerie bluish tinged light. As the crime scene investigators carried out their gruesome duties, shadows and shapes moved.

  Beyond that, I could see the fence and woods near where the tree had burst into flame, revealing the man with the virulent gaze. Those woods had been a fairyland in which my friends and I spun tales of enchantment, built a clubhouse, and camped out. Technically, as a preserve area, it was off limits to us, but it felt like our secret garden. I never remember ever seeing anything but beauty during our explorations. How old were those bones? Had we walked over the graves of the unfortunate souls buried out there?

  With people in hazmat suits coming and going from the brightly lit tented area, it looked more like a scene from a sci fi movie. One of those b-movies in which the saucers had landed and authorities are hauling the aliens into tents to dissect them. I’d slithered around in a form-fitting scaly skin as a lizard-lady with a tiny part in such a movie. “I mean you no harm,” had been my only line. Not something that wild-eyed demon could say to me or anyone else.

  I tried to remember what I could about Penney Lincoln. A strawberry blond with a pretty smile when she wore it. She’d been moody—funny at times, but mostly sullen and standoffish. Penney had an odd mix of friends, not that I knew her or anyone else well.

  Nor do I have any room to talk about Penney’s moodiness. That was my first year in middle school in a place where my southern accent stood out like a sore thumb, and most of my classmates had grown up together. I was still stinging from the fact that my mother and stepfather had sent me to live with Aunt Lettie to get rid of me. It was too soon to know that it was the best thing my parents could have ever done for me.

  “I miss you Aunt Lettie,” I whispered to the breeze as a cloud floated in front of the moon. I held my breath as I heard movement below. A pebble hit the rail of the balcony and I stepped back. Then a hail of gravel pinged off the wrought iron railing.

  “Lily!”

  “Austin?” I asked in a hoarse whisper as I leaned over the rail.

  “Yes. Please, let me in. I’m locked out.”

  “Where’s your key?” He stood too far away for the porchlight for me see him clearly.

  “I’m not sure. I left it inside somewhere.” The moon reappeared, and I could see he was barefoot and wearing nothing but a pair of pajama bottoms. His pleading caused my heart to do a little flip-flop. “Mercy, please? Come downstairs and let me in. I need to sleep before I’ve got to face Rikki and Dahlia and your entire posse. I’ll meet you at the front door, okay?”

  “Oh, all right. I’ll be right done.” I wasn’t completely convinced this wasn’t a ploy. I’d met a few “players” in Hollywood who had come up with outrageous angles to ensure we ended up alone in the middle of the night. I’d never met a guy like that who would have put up with what I’d already asked of Austin.

  Maybe if he hadn’t been sent away for two weeks on an assignment soon after we’d met, I’d be more willing to take a chance on love. When he left, it had hit me hard that Austin has a dangerous job that would take him away from me on a regular basis. Would men be shooting at him the way they had done when we met? Austin had tried to reassure me that most of the time fugitives didn’t fire a single shot. Often, the culprit was already in custody and Austin’s role was prisoner transport.

  It was so soon after burying Aunt Lettie, though, that I’d lost my nerve. It suddenly seemed too risky to become seriously involved with a man I could lose at any minute. I peeked over my shoulder at Judy resting so peacefully. Her words came back to me.

  “Who are you kidding? You can’t turn off the sparkle you get in your eyes when he walks into the room or smiles at you.”

  “I can try,” I’d said. Judy was doing her best to step in for Aunt Lettie—bless her heart.

  I quietly opened my bedroom door and closed it behind me. Not completely. I never do that now, or Marlowe drives me nuts. With all the extra people in the house, one or more of my pals get up almost every night for a drink, to find something to eat, or just to use the bathroom, and Marlowe’s off to play detective! Maybe I should have chosen another name for him.

  I hope my pintsized watchdog settles down at some point, but for now, he’s on security duty twenty-four-seven. When I got downstairs, there he was standing on his hind legs, peeking out of the window next to the front door. He ran to the door, stood up, and pawed at it, before returning to the window. His stubby tail wiggled so hard, he appeared to be doing a little dance. At least he wasn’t barking.

  “Get in here,” I whispered to Austin, holding the door open.

  “Gladly!” Austin practically jumped inside. As he did that, he brushed against me. His skin was cold.

  “Come with me,” I ordered him. “What were you doing out there?” I asked as I took him to the reading room that had been Lettie’s study while I grew up here.

  “I thought I heard someone outside. When I ran out to check, I didn’t mean to latch the door, but when I tried to get back in, it was locked.”

  I picked up a throw and wrapped it around Austin’s shoulders. I was so close I could smell the fresh air in his hair and on his skin. The fragrance of the Sandalwood soap he’d used made me dizzy.

  “I’m so glad you’re okay after what went on out there,” he whispered, pulling me close. “I never should have left you alone—not even for a minute. I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you.” I luxuriated in the comfort of his arms.

  “I feel the same way, Austin. I just need a little more time.” For the life of me, with my head on his chest, I couldn’t fathom why. There must be a million ways to lose the man you love—no matter what his profession. In fact, since we’d met, I’d come closer to being killed than he had.

  “Take all the time you need. Just don’t push me out of your life while you’re making up your mind.”

  “I won’t,” I said as I reached up, put my arms around his neck, and kissed him. We were lost in that kiss when I heard toenails clicking on the wood floors in the hallway—two sets of them. Marlowe and Darjeeling bolted into the reading room.

  “Darjeeling, you come back here right…” Melody stopped in the doorway. I was about to say something
, thinking we’d startled her. Both dogs growled and barked, as Melody pointed and screamed.

  5 The Numbers Man

  Before I could figure out what Melody was pointing at, she swayed. She was going down! I ran to catch her. Austin, still in his bare feet, grabbed a poker from the fireplace and took off.

  “Call 911. I don’t know if there are still uniformed officers on the property or not! Call Jesse, too!” I covered Melody with the throw Austin had dropped on the floor. As I grabbed the phone in the room and dialed 911, I heard footsteps upstairs.

  “Who’s there?” Zelda hollered as the front door slammed.

  “In here!” I yelled waiting for a dispatcher to pick up. Zelda came into the room and almost tripped over Melody.

  “Ow! You kicked me!” Melody yelped as she struggled to sit up, all twisted up in the throw. When Zelda stopped abruptly, Judy and Julie collided with her.

  “Judy, use the second line in the kitchen. Call Jesse and tell him to get up here to the house now!” Judy didn’t hesitate. I gave Melody a little shove so she could sit up as Carrie knelt beside us.

  “What’s happened? Are you hurt?” Carrie asked.

  “No. Just scared witless one too many times tonight. Is it still tonight?” Melody asked.

  “Yes, barely,” Zelda replied. She had a wicked-looking stiletto-heeled shoe in her hand. I had no doubt she could have wielded it effectively as a weapon—unless an intruder was armed with a gun. “Will you tell us what’s going on? Why is Judy calling Jesse?”

  “Hold on for a second. I’m waiting for the dispatcher to finish her ‘what is the nature of your emergency’ question.”

  “This is Lillian Callahan. We have an intruder at The Calla Lily Vineyards. Deputy U.S. Marshal Austin Jennings is after him—on foot.”

  “Another one?” she asked in an incredulous tone.

  “Yes, another one, or maybe the same one again. Are there any officers still on the property?”