by Deja Voss
“He could’ve seen something, Riley!” I shout. “This could fuck everything up!”
She rolls her eyes at me and offers me a cigarette. I put it to my lips, sucking it down as quickly as I can.
“It’s just Driller,” she says. “He’s a fucking pussy and dumb as a bag of rocks.”
The roar of a motorcycle exhaust echoes down the road. “Damn, how many of these guys are there?” I ask. The amount of men in leather vests far outnumber the crowd that’s gathered below, and every minute a new guy pulls up, pushing through the police tape. In this moment, I feel so little. I feel like we’re so very outnumbered.
She just chuckles and takes a swig from her flask.
“Mmm…” she sighs, raising her thin eyebrows. “That one ain’t so bad to look at.”
I press my face up against the glass, my heart starting to flutter. I take a deep breath hoping she doesn’t notice my reaction. I never forgot about that gorgeous stranger, Ransom, with the dark hair, chiseled jawline, the biker swagger. I really thought maybe I built him up in my mind through the cold of the winter, imagined him to be a lot sexier than I remembered, but seeing him part that crowd, I realize I completely underestimated him.
He’s a fucking stud. My palms get sweaty, and I try to hide the blush on my face.
“Ransom,” I say softly. “I know him.”
“Oh, he’s nothing but a fuck boy. Hit it and quit it kind of guy. You know the type. Although, I wouldn’t mind hitting that.”
I don’t know why I’m personally offended by that statement. Maybe it’s because she already has Kid, and some weird husband who doesn’t care that she has a boyfriend. She has a beautiful home, a family, and more money than God. I know Ransom and I could never be a thing, especially not after what I did, and what I’m about to do, but imagining her with him makes me angry.
I watch his every move, the way his shoulders swell as he talks to Driller, the anger on his face only intensifying his gorgeousness. It’s incredibly wrong the way it makes me feel all warm inside, lighting my core on fire. There’s something so raw and sexual about him, like he could hate fuck me into the ground and I wouldn’t even care. I’d die happy. Living in isolation so long definitely has me fucked in the head.
“Oh shit,” Riley says, jumping up and down like a teenybopper. “Things are about to get real good.”
The sky is gray and the rain is beating down, but even looking like a drowned rat, I recognize that face clear as day. That body. Everything about her. It’s like looking in a tattooed mirror aside from the color of her hair.
I didn’t expect to feel so emotional the first time I saw my sister. After all, she’s just another person on a list of many who turned their back on me, but my knees start to buckle and I have to use the window to hold myself up. Even if I don’t like her, even if she did betray me, she’s a part of me, and with that, she’s a part of my mother.
She walks over to Stoney, and he throws his arms around her, and it makes me sick to my stomach. I can taste the bile in my mouth as I watch her find comfort in this monster.
“God, if there wasn’t such a big crowd, it’d be so easy for you to take them both out right now,” Riley says. “Bang, bang. All done.” She brushes her hands together and holds them up in the air and starts to giggle.
“That’s not part of the deal,” I say. “She was never part of the deal.”
Riley rolls her eyes. “You’re not getting soft on me, are you?”
“I’m not here to do anything but what I promised,” I say. “I don’t know what kind of bone you have to pick with Pearl, but that’s not my problem. Unless it comes from Kid’s lips, I’m not doing it.”
“I get it,” she says, wrapping her arms around me in a gentle squeeze. “I know this is probably a lot for you to take in. You just gotta remember, these people are not nice people. I know what you lived through, Annabella. Kid told me everything. As soon as I heard about you, the only thing I could think of was “how can I help her”. Broke my damn heart. I just want what’s best for you.”
“You don’t know shit about what I lived through,” I growl. The skin on my back starts to itch. These scars will never go away, and it’s a sick joke that sometimes they just randomly start burning in case I ever let myself forget.
“I know what I know,” she says softly, brushing my hair out of my eyes. “I can’t pretend like I understand it, though. You’re right. That’s cruel of me. I’m sorry I even said anything.”
I gulp, take a deep breath, and remind myself that Kid would never put me in a bad situation. If he says this girl’s heart is in the right place, then it must be so. I wish he was here so bad right now, though. I wish I could talk to him. I wish I could see him. I hate that he’s locked up.
“I think I’ve seen enough,” I say. “Can we go home? I don’t like leaving Juniper all by herself all day.”
She takes another look out the window and looks back at me sadly. As we walk towards the door, I look over my shoulder, trying to catch one last glimpse of that man who I haven’t been able to shake since the day I met him. I don’t know why I’m torturing myself like this. I’m sure if he found out what I did, he’d probably destroy me.
He is not my friend.
Even though I’m here to make sure him and his club are safe, he can never know it.
11
Ransom:
“You gotta fucking listen to me,” I mutter under my breath to Driller in the parking lot. We just had a sit-down with the Vagrants on account of who could’ve possibly put a hit out on Vinnie. “Something ain’t right, brother.”
I don’t like where things are heading, not at all. We’ve got a president who isn’t in his right mind calling the shots for the rest of us. Now that Pearl is here, Driller’s head is shoved so far up his ass he can’t even function. I can’t blame him. She’s a pretty bitch. She’s sympathetic towards him. Driller isn’t used to women being nice to him; hell, his mama walked out when he was just a toddler. He’s the kind of guy who falls head over heels if somebody looks at him a certain way.
Fucking sucker.
As long as she makes him happy, I’m gonna do my best to support him, but right now is not the damn time. Right now, we got somebody picking off people close to the club while our president Stoney is acting like it’s just all gonna go away.
Barret, their leader seems to think it’s some bitch. At least that’s what they said at our sit-down tonight. Something about the whole situation isn’t adding up to me, though. The cops brushed everything under the rug, his body was burned up before a proper investigation could even be done, and I feel like I’m screaming into the void because everybody else is acting like life is business as usual, except our enforcer Decker who’s damn near drooling at the prospect of getting to shed some blood.
“I want to claim her, Ransom,” Driller says, straddling his bike. “Tomorrow. Before her old man’s funeral.”
“WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?” I scream into the night. “Has everyone here lost their goddamn minds? You’ve been with this bitch for like three days, Driller. I want to punch you in the face so hard right now.”
“When you know you know,” he says. “I know. Besides, you yourself are falling all over your feet around her. She’s great, right?”
I groan and walk away from him. Just because I flirt with a bitch doesn’t mean I think she’s great. At this point in my life, they’re all the same to me. “Don’t you think I thought Carley was great?” I shout. “You just wait. One day you’ll be picking out baby names and the next day she’ll be fucking your uncle.”
He gets off his bike and chases after me.
“What are you trying to say, Ransom?”
“Don’t worry about it.”
He grabs me by the shoulders and stares me in the eyes. “What the fuck happened with Carley? I know you caught her sleeping around. I know the baby wasn’t real.”
“Yeah.” I fish in my pocket for a cigarette and turn to walk away.
/>
“Did you catch her with my uncle?” he asks.
“I don’t fucking trust him anymore, Driller.” Still to this day, I can’t bring myself to say the way he betrayed me out loud.
“Did he know you caught them?”
I don’t have to say anything. I spit at the ground and walk towards my bike.
“I’m your fucking friend, Ransom,” he shouts after me. “Your best friend. Why the hell didn’t you tell me? You haven’t been yourself since Carley, man. You’re like a shell of the man you used to be. Fuck my uncle, man. Fuck Stoney. He didn’t have any right to take that from you.”
“It’s over,” I mutter.
“Why’d you keep this shit from me?” he shouts after me.
“Because at the end of the day, Driller, I got nobody. He might be our president but he’s your uncle. Your old man is the vice president. What the hell do I get for throwing him under the bus, and why the hell would you even care?”
He punches me in the face. Definitely not as hard as he could, but hard enough to piss me off. I tackle him to the ground, grabbing fistfuls of gravel and tossing it in his eyes.
“Don’t you ever fucking say you have nobody,” he screams, grabbing my shirt so tight around my neck I start to gag. “I’m your brother. I’m your best friend.”
“Let go!” I barely gag out, trying to roll off him. I flop over on my back in the gravel, and he lays there too. I burst out into laughter as soon as I catch my breath.
“We’re gonna fix this, Ransom,” he says. “I promise. As soon as we catch these guys and get Stoney out of the picture, we’re gonna make this club ours. We’re gonna get through this, brother.”
“You really want to claim Pearl?” I ask. Claiming is a huge deal in our club. A lifetime commitment. It means a woman ain’t just somebody’s girlfriend or old lady anymore. It means she’s a part of the club. Part of all of us. I don’t like how fast this shit is happening, and maybe part of it is my selfish fear of losing my best friend, but I need to suck it up and let him be happy.
“Tomorrow,” he says. “You in?”
I shake my head, pushing myself up off the ground and dusting myself off. “Don’t threaten me with a good time.” It’s been a long time since I’ve been inside a bitch. Maybe this is what I need to get back on the horse. Knowing it’s a true one-and-done and then she’s his for life might just be the thing that finally helps me get over Carley and start moving on with my life.
“I’m gonna go talk to Kid tomorrow. I think he should probably know everything that’s been going on. Why don’t you and Red Eye take her shopping and keep an eye on her. I don’t like leaving her alone with all this shit going on.”
“Aren’t you the sweetest,” I grumble. Babysitting his old lady isn’t exactly how I want to spend my day, but maybe it’ll help me get to know her a little better. Maybe it’ll help me see what he sees in her.
I throw him a salute and hop on my bike, riding off towards my house. I guess I feel a little less worried knowing Driller has my back, knowing we’re heading towards something greater, but I still don’t like what’s going on. I want my club back to normal. I want everyone under control. I want the killing to stop and I want to be respected again. I want to be in a position to claim a woman of my own.
I want control.
12
Annabella:
“You sure you don’t want me to stay the night with you?” Riley asks. “I really hate leaving you here by yourself, but Henry’s on the overnight shift and I can’t leave the boys alone. You sure you just don’t want to come stay at my house?”
“I can’t stay at your house anymore, Riley,” I remind her, when really what I want to say is “GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!” and slam the door in her face. I had a good talk with Kid this afternoon, and he agreed it was probably better for me to stay at his buddy’s apartment until the deed was done. Riley can’t keep her big fucking mouth shut for more than five minutes, and I need all the rest and quiet focus I can get so I can finish off the job tomorrow. “Just make sure Juniper gets fed. And don’t let your little brats terrorize her.”
I feel bad leaving my dog behind for the night, but I’m so close to the finish line. All I have to do is drop the bomb off at the clubhouse and wait for Stoney to come running out. In the chaos, it’ll be nothing for me to finish the deed.
“I’ll see you in the morning. Bright and early,” I say, and she pulls me in for a hug. She smells like cinnamon and sugar and sunshine and it almost makes me gag. I shut the door behind her and lean my back against it, breathing in a sigh of relief.
“You’re almost ready, pumpkin,” the big lunk of a guy says. He’s dripping sweat, a cigarette hanging from his lips. The table is covered in wires and screws and I just shrug. I wasn’t heart set on the bomb idea. I don’t want anybody to get hurt except for Stoney.
“You’re sure this isn’t going to hurt anybody?” I ask, running my fingers over the big tacky floral arrangement that’s supposed to conceal it.
“It’s like a glorified firework. Relax,” he says. “I’m not gonna steer you dirty, girl. Kid’ll fucking have my ass.”
I gulp. I don’t know exactly how far Kid’s power reaches, but this afternoon he pulled a little stunt at the prison to get himself thrown in solitary confinement. I guess it was his way of completely separating himself from the situation, and I get it. I just wonder what’s so scary about him that this giant monster is so afraid of him even though he’s behind bars.
“Wanna order a pizza or something?” he asks.
I hadn’t even noticed how hard my stomach was growling. I haven’t noticed much of anything since the incident to be honest, except this aching suspicion that I’m in way over my head and my mom wouldn’t have approved of my choices in the least bit.
I guess it just goes to show how fucked up I truly am when the remorse I feel isn’t because of the death of my father at my own hands, but because of what my dead mother would’ve thought. Then again, Vinnie was the man who put me in this position to begin with.
“Pizza sounds good,” I say. This guy doesn’t really have much to say, but I know that’s for the better. The less I know about him and his accomplices, the less likely I am to feel attached should anything go south. Kid already told me, no matter what, these guys are expendable. Preserve myself at all costs. Like I’m some kind of important person. Like anybody gives a fuck about me.
He dials his phone, and I pace around the dingy apartment, thankful I won’t be spending much more than a night or two here. All the walls have holes in them, and the thick smell of cigarette smoke permeates everything from the dirty old couch, so threadbare the springs are popping out, to the wrinkled curtains, yellowed and frayed. It’s a nice change from Riley’s incessant talking and following me around—just the low roar of some random infomercial on the television and the sound of grunting and heavy metal coming from the bedroom these guys use as a gym.
There’s a knock on the door, and I know we’re in the city but it’s amazing how fast the food got here. I walk to the door and peek through the peephole, and my heart starts to race. Standing outside in the hallway, looking pissed as hell, is Driller in his leather cut. He leans up against the door until all I can see is his muscular frame blocking out all the light from the hallway to the apartment.
“Barret,” I whisper as loudly as I can. “Come on, dude.”
He’s hunched over the kitchen table snoring. Driller’s knocks escalate. I feel for my pistol on my hip and pull the door open so fast he stumbles forward, falling to the floor.
“What the fuck?” he mutters as our eyes lock. I don’t want to hurt him. That wasn’t part of the plan, but I know if he overtakes me, I’m royally fucked. The only thing going through my mind right now is something I brought with me from long long ago, something my mama taught me back when we were in captivity. An unconscious man can’t hurt you.
Driller’s nostrils flare as he starts to push himself up off the floor, and I do th
e only thing I can think of while his hands are distracted, flexing my leg and delivering a clean roundhouse kick to the side of his neck. He hits the floor with a thud. I don’t know how much time I have, but I quickly feel him up and down, grabbing his pistol from the back of his jeans and the giant bowie knife strapped to his ankle.
“Barret! Wake the fuck up!” I scream.
My jaw drops the instant I realize we aren’t alone.
“Ransom,” I stammer, a giant lump forming in my throat. I cower down on the ground, putting my hands over my face. I can smell the sweat and aftershave on his skin, the veins in his arms bulge under his tight t-shirt, and the anger in his eyes is terrifying enough that I put my hands up in surrender.
His face instantly softens the moment he sees me. There’s a look of confusion and hurt behind those eyes. “Annabella, what are you doing here?” he asks. “What’s happening?”
He reaches out for me, and I brace my body, fully expecting him to knock me out just like Driller.
Instead, he touches my face, and my lips start to tremble. He is by far the most overwhelming person I’ve ever encountered in my life. That’s the only word for it. Excessive overwhelm. I can’t find words, I can’t move, can’t do anything but blink like a deer in headlights as I get lost in those dark eyes.
“Are you working with Kid?” he growls.
“Are you going to hurt me?” I ask.
“Annabella, what the fuck is going on?” His hands move to my shoulders and he squeezes, looking over at his friend laid out on the ground. “Holy shit…” he says, his eyes growing wide. “You’re Vinnie’s daughter. You’re Pearl’s sister.”
I shrug. “I never met either one of them before. I’m just here to do a job. It’s nothing personal.”
He rolls his eyes and rests his tongue on the tip of his teeth, and it sends goosebumps down my body. The fact that he’s not going into a rage, but instead laughing at me, it makes me think he’s seriously twisted. My heart palpitates with both fear and curiosity. Lust and derision. I shouldn’t even be talking to him.