“Yeah, I know. My senior staff. The problem with that is, they are my subordinates. They know how I think, and they might subconsciously try to tell me what I want to hear. Plus, I kinda know what they will say. And right now, Smythe is in no condition to be making difficult decisions.”
“Mm. I sense that is not the only reason you are not including them in the discussion.”
“You’re right. I know what they will say, and I don’t like it.”
“Do you know what I will say?”
“No. That’s the point.”
“Very well. I will help in any way I can. However, the subject may be outside my area of-”
“The subject is outside my area of expertise also. Nagatha, sometimes, when you’re talking through an issue with someone, it helps just to have someone listen, you know? It’s like, it helps for me to talk out loud instead of the conversation running in my own head. Also, when you talk with someone, you have to organize your thoughts so they make sense, and that forces you to think, you know?”
“Being human sounds extremely complicated, Dear.”
“It is. Ok, here’s the problem. Uh, you may already know about this, if you have been talking with Skippy.”
“About moving wormholes? Yes, Skippy has of course kept me informed. He has been boasting nonstop about this new addition to his extremely awesome set of capabilities. I wish I had a hand so I could slap that little twit.”
“Nagatha!” I laughed. “Everyone wants to slap Skippy once in a while.”
“Hmmph. I have tried ignoring him, but he bypasses my buffers.”
“I will talk with him about that. Ok, so you know that Skippy thinks he can move wormholes. Can you guess my dilemma?”
“I believe so, yes. You are concerned that the Gateway must be disabled before he begins moving the wormhole he is calling Backstop, with no guarantee that Backstop can be moved a sufficient distance, or that it will open properly once it is in position.”
“Yeah. That is the problem.”
“Skippy did say you were whining about the issue.”
“Whining?”
“Oh, Dear. Did I upset you? He said you were whining and moping around and wringing your hands, and generally doing everything you could do avoid making a completely obvious decision.”
“That little shithead. I’m going to-”
“Well, this is awkward. Joseph, I agree with Skippy. Not about whining, he is too harsh on you. He does not appreciate the enormous burden of responsibility on your shoulders. However, in this case, it does appear to me that the decision is fairly obvious, if you think logically about it.”
“Uh- Crap.”
“Joseph, were you hoping I would disagree?”
“I was hoping we could discuss it, talk it through.”
“We can certainly do that if it would help you, Dear. Then you can make the only decision that makes sense.”
“Well, great, then. We-”
“The talking part does seem to be a waste of time. But I am not a human, so-”
“Fine,” I sighed. “Walk me through why this is so obvious to everyone but me, Ok?”
“You will not be insulted?”
“Trust me, I am way beyond that. Go ahead.”
“Very well,” she slipped into elementary schoolteacher mode. Her voice softened and she spoke slowly, like she was trying to explain mathematics to a first-grader. “First, can I assume our objective is to protect Earth, or if that is not possible, to bring as many humans as possible to the beta site?”
“Sure. Yes.”
“Good.” I mentally pictured her patting me on the head for giving the right answer. Maybe if I got another question right, she would give me a lollipop. She continued in the same condescending tone of voice. “The first objective, that of protecting Earth, is of course not possible. Our last mission stranded a Maxolhx battlegroup outside the galaxy, and there is no way to provide a reasonable explanation of why the battlegroup will not be returning to Maxolhx territory. When those ships are declared overdue, the most dangerous species in the galaxy will be focused on learning what happened to their ships. Soon after, they will be focused on turning Earth into radioactive ash.”
“Yeah, I get that part. We’re playing for time before the inevitable destruction of our home planet. And it’s my fault. Don’t remind me, Ok?”
“That leaves an alternate objective; that of saving as many humans as possible, by bringing them to the beta site. Unfortunately, at present we can’t bring anyone from Earth to the beta site, because the Gateway wormhole is under blockade.”
“Uh huh. Next you’re going to say that because of the blockade, there is no downside to disabling Gateway permanently. Either way, we can’t use Gateway to get home.”
“Correct. Therefore-”
“Except that isn’t true.” I interrupted her.
“It is not?” She was taken aback; I could tell by her tone of voice reverting to normal.
“No, it’s not. Valkyrie is,” I rapped my knuckles on the bulkhead behind me. “The single most powerful starship in the galaxy. We could run the blockade if we really need to, if we plan it properly, and if we can achieve surprise. We could get home, and we have a decent chance of taking the Dutchman home with us. It is not true there is no downside to disabling Gateway.”
“Um,” she cleared her throat. “You are correct, Colonel Bishop.”
Mentally, I high-fived myself with satisfaction. “See? Never assume there isn’t-”
“Of course, flying our two ships to Earth would have absolutely no useful purpose. As you stated, Valkyrie is the single most powerful warship in the galaxy. One ship can’t accomplish anything worthwhile.”
“Well, I-”
“Valkyrie alone cannot protect Earth. Therefore, running the blockade would not accomplish any mission objective. It would be a stunt, to make you feel like you are doing something, but actually it would be counterproductive. Running the blockade would show the Maxolhx that Earth holds an important secret, and make them more determined to investigate, and ultimately destroy, your homeworld. It also-”
“Ok, Ok,” I waved my arms in surrender. “I get it. Running the blockade is a bad idea.”
“Correct. Therefore, as Gateway is already unavailable for the foreseeable future, there is no downside to permanently disabling it. The only possible way you can assist Earth is to create an alternate access point, by moving and awakening a dormant wormhole.”
“Even if that wormhole can’t be moved, or can’t be moved far enough to make a difference, or can’t be activated after it has been moved?”
“Again, currently you have no access to Earth. Moving and awakening a dormant wormhole provides at least a possibility that we could get to your homeworld and do something useful, without alerting the enemy, or revealing that someone is flying around in a stolen senior-species battlecruiser.”
“Crap.”
“Joseph, I am curious. You appear to be dismayed at the prospect of regaining access to Earth?”
Dismayed, I thought to myself? That is not really a word people use to describe themselves. People say they are pissed off, or disappointed, or angry, but not ‘dismayed’. The people who use that word are mostly in English costume dramas, where all the men are wearing dinner jackets and have names like Lord Sir Pelham Bruxner-Randall K.B.E., whatever the hell those initials stand for. The women faint and get ‘The Vapors’ because they are wearing corsets that are too tight, and I don’t mean the fun kind of corsets. These corsets are under their big fancy dresses where you can’t see them.
Uh, not that corsets are a particular turn-on for me, I mean, I know they must be uncomfortable and-
Uh.
I’m just going to shut up before I get myself in more trouble.
Anyway, back to Nagatha’s question. “I am dismayed because I have to agree with your logic, and that means Skippy was right. Again.”
“Very good, dear. I am pleased that talking with you helped.”<
br />
It was more like her talking at me, but I wasn’t going to tell her that. “Yeah, I feel much better about it now. Thanks.”
“Do you wish me to tell Skippy to proceed?”
“No, not yet. I need to think about it some more. I know, that doesn’t make sense to you. It’s a human thing. I need to get used to the idea, let in sink into my skull.”
Next, I called Skippy again. “Ok, when can we get started on moving this Backstop wormhole?’
He gave me the side-eye. “You’re not going to discuss this with senior staff first?”
“I am, but I already know they will tell me to go for it. If I’m going to say something stupid, I’d rather not do it in a group of people.”
“Probably a good idea. Joe, I do not understand what your problem is. We had no way to get back to Earth, or do anything truly useful to help your people, until you asked me whether it is possible to move a wormhole. Now, we have the potential not only to get home, for resupply and reinforcements, we also might be able to save thousands of monkeys-”
“Humans, Skippy. Thousands of humans.”
“Sure, whatever. Anywho, we have the fabulous opportunity, and instead of being excited, you are acting like this is the end of the world.”
“Because it really could be the end of the world.”
“Joe,” he sighed. “Realistically, you know the long-term survival of humanity is never going to happen, right? No matter what you do, it’s one planet against an entire galaxy. I would say you have the advantage of having the magnificence of me on your side, but if the Rindhalu or Maxolhx also have access to Elder AIs and they get into the fight, I can’t help you much longer.”
“I do know that. I try not to think about it, Ok?”
“Then what are you worried about?”
“I’m worried that, five minutes after you disable Gateway, someone thinks up a better idea, and we will wish we hadn’t killed the only wormhole that has guaranteed access to Earth.”
“Shit, Joe. It is always possible that someone will think of a better plan. Moving the Backstop wormhole is the best plan we have now. You want to wait?”
“No. We can’t wait. The clock is ticking, as soon as the Maxolhx realize their battlegroup is late, they will be sending more ships to Earth. The longer we wait, the less time we have to transport people to Avalon. We need to go now.”
“Ok, then what is the real problem?”
“The real problem is the Law of Unintended Consequences. Every time I think we’re doing something good, it leads to bigger problems later. Can you think of any downsides to moving Backstop and waking it up?”
“The greatest risk is triggering a wormhole shift, of course. However, I think that is very unlikely, if we disable Gateway first. Based on what I know of network architecture-”
“How much do you know about that? Not long ago, you told me that you had no idea how the network operated.”
“That was then, this is now, knucklehead. I have learned a lot. Enough to be certain that if we move Backstop without first disabling Gateway, that will trigger an unscheduled shift, and cause Gateway to open out of my control.”
“Are you certain we won’t trigger a shift by moving Backstop?”
“Certain? No, I am not absolutely certain. I am pretty damned confident.”
“Confident enough to bet your life on it?”
“Enough to bet your life on it. Come on, Joe. I’m immortal, remember? What I can tell you is that I selected Backstop because, when I proposed moving it to the local network, it showed me the future configuration of the network. The only change is that Backstop is near Earth, and operational. No shift will be triggered.”
“Ok, that is a relief.” While I did not trust our absent-minded alien AI, I had to trust the wormhole network. That thing had been operating on its own for millions of years without any problem, until monkeys started screwing with it.
“However,” he waggled a finger at me to get my attention. “I can’t promise the same for the other local networks. To create a quick, easy, secure route from Earth to Avalon, I will need to move other wormholes that belong to other local networks. I can’t guarantee shifts will not be triggered in those networks, but I don’t think we care much about those? None of those networks are near Earth, or Paradise, or in regions critical to the Jeraptha and other potential allies.”
“Shit. Show me these wormholes you need to move again, please. And this time, show me the area covered by each network.”
“I just sent the file to your laptop, Joe. Now, tell me the real problem.”
“What? That is the real problem, the Law of Unin-”
“Yes, blah blah blah. That Law is always lurking out there, waiting to give you a smackdown. That is not the real problem. The real problem is, your confidence is shot. We lost most of the crew, and you blame yourself.”
“I blame myself because it is my responsibility. Adams might never be the same again. I took that away from her, because I-”
“Because you made a judgment call, based on the best information you had at the time. Joe, you can’t change the past. You can affect the future. If you are feeling guilty about something you couldn’t control, you need to channel that energy into something useful. Or you need to step aside and let someone else command the ship.”
“Wow.”
“Joe, you told me that sometimes, a friend needs to tell you the truth even if it is harsh. If you are emotionally unable to perform your duty, you need to admit that to yourself.”
“That is harsh.”
“Adams would tell you the same thing, only she would say ‘Suck it up, buttercup’.”
“Yeah,” I had to laugh though I didn’t want to. “She would say that. Ok, yeah, my confidence is not at an all-time high right now. Thanks, Skippy. I needed to hear that. The people we lost, I can’t bring back. What I can do is be the best possible leader I can be.” My zPhone chimed with an alert, and I glanced at the time. In half an hour, I needed to be on the bridge for a duty shift. “I’ll look at the chart of those other wormholes you want to move, and we’ll review the issue at the staff meeting tomorrow morning.”
“But you already know what the decision is, right?” He asked eagerly.
“Unless somebody really surprises me, yes.”
“Oh, goodie. Since you first asked about the possibility of moving wormholes, and evacuating Earth, I have been making plans. I am deep into pre-production of my game show, and-”
“Wait, what? What game show?”
“Ugh. Come on, Joe, I’m talking about the smash-hit game show where contestants from around the world will compete for a coveted spot aboard one of the evac ships.”
“WHAT?” My brain locked up and all I could do was glare at him.
“The working title is ‘The Extermination Games’, but that’s too derivative.”
“You want people to compete on a game show? And the losers stay on Earth and die?”
“Um, well, when you say it that way-”
“Right. It would be totally Ok if I used the right words to describe this idiotic concept.”
“How about we change the rules, so the losers get the opportunity to buy evac tickets at a discounted price? That is a way better parting gift than the stupid lawn furniture that losing contestants get on most game shows.”
“I cannot believe you think this is a good idea.”
“How else do you plan to choose who gets aboard the ships, and who gets left behind?”
“I don’t know, a-” I truly did not know. My thinking had not gotten that far. “Maybe a lottery or something, we-”
“A lottery?” He scoffed. “Where’s the fun in that? A lottery doesn’t give people around the world a chance to cheer for the people they want to survive, and be gleeful that the jerks they hate will not be getting a ticket-”
“We are not selling tickets. Listen, shithead, selecting who gets aboard an evac ship is not our problem. The governments of Earth will make that decisio
n, and-”
“Oh, bra-vo, Joe. That is a great idea. Governments always make wise and informed decisions. For example, sending the UN Expeditionary Force offworld to fight alongside your benevolent new allies, the Kristang. That was a brilliant decision.”
“Governments make terrible decisions all the time. The point is, I don’t have to make that call.”
“I could help, if you like. We could choose worthy candidates from the Followers of the Holy Skippyasyermuni.”
My mouth dropped open. “You want to give priority to people who worship you?”
“Sure, why not? They have clearly already proven their worthiness. Besides, Joe, I’m not talking about bringing all of those boneheads to Avalon. Just the people who have proven their faithfulness by attaining Gold status. That means they signed up at least twenty other followers.”
“That is not happening. End of discussion.”
“But-”
“No buts. Drop the subject. If you want, you can discuss this with the governments of Earth when we get home.” That was not a concession on my part, I figured Skippy was going to do that anyway.
“Deal. Getting to the far end of Backstop is complicated, we have to go through three wormholes, then it will be four days of jumping to reach the site.”
“How confident are you about moving a wormhole?”
“How confident are you about thinking up a reason why the network should allow me to screw with its architecture? Because if I can’t explain why the move is necessary, the network will lock me out.”
“Working on it, Skippy. Working on it.”
The next morning’s staff meeting went pretty much the way I expected. The event was a little different from a typical meeting, because Chang participated via hologram. The original hologram was too accurate, everyone agreed it was creepy because it looked so much like Chang, but the face was not quite right. Skippy grumbled that he was doing the best he could with incompatible technologies aboard the Dutchman and Valkyrie, and that if we monkeys kept complaining, Chang could participate by voice-only. Instead, I requested he make the hologram a bit fuzzy, so it was clear that the image was an effect.
Valkyrie (Expeditionary Force Book 9) Page 30