Twenty-Three
Faith
“Hi.” One of the young men—the one with jet black hair and the smirk, the one I’d noticed right away- walked over.
“Hi.” I glanced around for Bailey. She’d accepted a dance with one of the other men. Making polite conversation for a few minutes was one thing. Doing more than that was a whole one another.
“I’m Artum.” He held out his hand.
I looked at it for a moment. It was calloused. Much like mine. I accepted his outstretched hand. “Faith.”
“Hi, Faith. Interesting name. Not one I’ve heard much.”
“How many girls names have you heard?” I was only half teasing. Maybe he knew more girls than I did. I couldn’t even remember what life was like outside the Glen.
He laughed. “Good point. I suppose considering how few of us there are left it’s a good thing they’ve managed to be unique when it comes to names.”
“Did you want to come here tonight?” I sipped the sweet bubbly drink Bailey had shoved in my hand. It was purple, and I wasn’t sure I even wanted to know what was in it.
“Wow. I wasn’t expecting that question.”
“Well, did you?” I hated when people tiptoed around questions by trying to change the subject. But maybe that wasn’t what he was doing. I waited. Hoping he proved me wrong.
“Yes. I did. Didn’t you?”
“No.” I shook my head. “Not at all.” If he only knew how much I’d fought against attending.
He took a sip from his purple drink. By his facial expression he wasn’t enjoying it any more than I was. “You want to stay in the Glen forever?”
“No. Not a day more than I have to. Which is why I’m here.”
“I see.” He put his hand inside his jacket pocket.
“Know of any other ways out of here?” I glanced around again for Bailey. She was still out there twirling around. I often wondered why we were so different. My Aunt Quinn certainty wasn’t like that—at least not the parts of her I remembered. And neither was my mother. But maybe as children they had been. They never talked about their childhoods aside from talking about my grandparents.
“No. Sorry. But is pairing off and starting a family unit really such a bad option?” He seemed to have a real question in his eyes.
“For me? Yes. I haven’t ever lived on my own. I want the time to experience that.” Maybe that made me selfish—I understood how much was at stake and that each of us was expected to do what we could, but I didn’t want that. At least not yet.
He nodded. “I understand that.”
“You do?” I set my mostly untouched cup down on a long thin table.
“Why do you seem surprised?”
I shrugged. “I’m not used to people understanding.”
“Not even your friend?” He nodded toward Bailey. “I’ve seen you two around.”
“You have? They’ve never let us see you. They kept us completely separate from the boys growing up. It was one of those rules they refused to break, just as they refused to let us see our parents again until we paired off.”
“I didn’t say they let us do anything.” He winked.
“Oh. You are a rule breaker?” Maybe this guy wasn’t so bad after all. It wasn’t that I idolized rebels, but I had no time for someone who blindly followed others.
“Of course. Aren’t you?”
“I wish I were.” I eyed my cup. I didn’t want more of the drink, but holding the cup had given me something to do with my hands.
“You can be.”
“She’s my cousin.” I don’t know why I told him that. But I did. I was hit by the need to share everything with him I could.
“Cousin? Huh? That must have been something. Growing up together.”
“She’s like a sister—or how I would think that would be. Our mothers are sisters.”
“Rare family.”
“We are.” Lucky too. No one really believed our story, the lengths our mothers went to protect us. “What about you?”
“Oh. Well, I was created the traditional way if that’s what you mean.” He waggled an eyebrow. “But my mom and I were brought to Central.”
“Did you escape before or after the fall?”
“After.” His voice fell a little.
“I was born before but was never in it. My cousin was.” Bailey didn’t remember her time in Central consciously, but she was still plagued by nightmares where she was all alone in a dark room. We both were pretty sure those were some sort of repressed memories.
“The worst of humanity comes out in times of crisis.”
“The worst of humanity always comes out.” The good got squashed as soon as it tried to rear its head.
“Not always. There is always some good in the world.”
“You are far more optimistic than I am. You should talk to Bailey instead of me.” I watched as she spun around, a huge grin on her face. I couldn’t imagine ever being that happy and carefree.
“But I want to talk to you.” He turned so his back was to the dance floor.
“Why?” I clasped my elbow with my other hand. Why was it so hard to figure out what to do with my hands?
“Why do we ever want to do anything?” He was so calm. Unlike me, he wasn’t fidgeting.
“I don’t know.” I took a deep breath. I was being ridiculous. This was just a man. An attractive one who actually had a sense of humor, but that didn’t change anything. A few more hours and the ball would be over. Then I just had to survive without Bailey until I aged out of the Glen. I could do it.
“I mean some things can’t be explained. You just have this way about you. Like you are above it all. Like you can see things no one else can.” His eyes looked into mine—really into mine, like he was trying to see inside of me. I tried to look away, but I couldn’t.
“In other words, because I’m jaded.”
He laughed again. He had a nice laugh. It was deep and comforting. “You aren’t jaded. You are real.”
“And is there a difference between those two things?” Maybe I couldn’t pull my eyes away, but I could talk. I wasn’t becoming completely useless.
“A big difference.”
“Would you like to—"
I didn’t let him finish his thought. “No. I don’t dance.”
“What makes you think I was going to ask you to dance?” He inclined his head to the side.
“What else would you have been asking?” I felt a strange emotion. Embarrassment. What did I care if I got that wrong?
“I was going to ask if you wanted to take a walk.”
I searched his face. Was he merely making an excuse? “In the dark?”
“Yes. Are you afraid of walking in the dark?” His lips twisted into a smile.
“Not generally.” I wasn’t afraid of the dark. But was I afraid of walking in the dark with him?
“We can bring a chaperone.” He nodded in the direction of the crowd.
“We will have to bring a chaperone.” There was no way they’d let us outside of the building alone.
“True enough. We probably will have to. Or we’ll be told to. Doesn’t mean we have to.”
“Are you suggesting we sneak out of here?” I took one step back.
“Are you ready to admit you have a rebel side?” He raised an eyebrow.
“No.” I shook my head.
“So, I should find a chaperone?”
“No. That won’t be necessary.” What had I just agreed to?
Twenty-Four
Maverick
Maybe I’d been good at following orders and keeping my mouth shut while at Central, but everything had changed now. It had changed the moment I met Quinn, and as the months became years, it was increasingly harder for me to even remember the man I was before.
Yet here I was. Keeping my mouth shut and following orders. The alternative was far worse. If I was thrown out of the Glen I’d never seen Quinn and Bailey again.
Bolton had struggled at first too. He w
as nearly thrown out our second night there, but Clayton had talked him down with a promise we’d see the girls soon and that they were safe. Other men had also taken his weapons. Bolton was right. The weapons they had put ours to shame. Neither of us knew whether we could trust his promises at all, but with no other alternatives, we clung to them.
As the months moved on, so too did Bolton. Kayla didn’t say much when he married just a few short months after putting his name in the mating pool. The marriage was pushed forward quickly when his eventual wife got pregnant. Unfortunately, she lost the baby, but they had hope that they would get a second chance. Either way, he was a lucky man, and although I wasn’t sure he would ever fully get over Kayla, he seemed happy.
Clayton’s words had been at least partially true. I saw the women and girls often, and they appeared to be completely unharmed. So, I continued to follow rules and keep my mouth shut as long as I got to see them when promised. But I wasn’t sure how much more of it I could take.
“What are you thinking about?” Quinn lay back in the grass. I’d just finished my shift at the medical center. Quinn had spent most of the day making clothing.
“What makes you ask? How do you know I’m thinking about anything in particular?”
“I can tell.”
“Oh. Can you now?”
“Yes. You get this look on your face. This pensive stare. The kind of stare where I’m afraid if I’m not careful you’ll be lost to your thoughts forever.”
“Worried about me, are you?”
She leaned up on an elbow. “Of course, I am. And I’m worried about losing you.”
“You don’t have to be.”
“Sure, I do. None of us truly know what’s to come.”
“No. But that doesn’t mean we have to pass the minutes of our lives worrying.”
“Says the man who worries almost constantly.”
I shrugged. “I didn’t say I took my own advice.”
She laughed. The real, light laugh of hers. Gradually it was coming back, but not fully. Something about our journey to the Glen had put out some of her light, and try as I might I couldn’t get it back yet. But I would. I’d had to give up on many things in my life, but I’d never give up on giving Quinn the happiness she deserved.
“Come on, tell me.”
“Tell you what? I forget what we were talking about.”
She pushed my arm. “Don’t be like that. You know what I mean. What were you thinking about so intently?”
“I was thinking about you.” I went with honesty. There was no reason trying to hide anything from Quinn when she’d figure it out anyway. Besides, I didn’t want to hide anything from her.
“What about me?”
She turned onto her side, her body mere inches from mine.
“Are you sure you want to know?”
“I asked, didn’t I?” She blinked a few times and wiped her eyelashes.
“Yes, but sometimes we don’t really want to know the things we ask about.”
“I always want to know what you’re thinking.” She reached out and brushed some hair away from my eyes.
“I was thinking about whether you’ll ever know exactly how much you mean to me.”
“Well, I know what you mean to me.” Her answer wasn’t the one I was expecting. Usually, she shut down any talks about emotions pretty quickly.
“Oh?” I didn’t want to press too hard, but I wanted to know. She’d said things all the time about appreciating my help and that she couldn’t picture her life without me. I wondered if this would be different. Probably not, although she was the one offering it up.
She stared at me silently for a moment before she opened her mouth. “I love you, Maverick.”
My heart skipped a beat. “What?” I had to have heard her wrong.
“I love you.” She wrinkled her nose. “That wasn’t the reaction I was hoping for…”
I took her hands in mine and helped her sit up. “I’m sorry. I love you, too. You know that. I was just surprised.”
“Surprised that I finally said what I should have said years ago?” There was an amused twinkle in her eye.
“I didn’t want you to say it until you mean it.”
“I’ve known it for a long time, but I didn’t want to. I was scared I guess.”
“Scared for you or Bailey?”
“Both.” She moistened her lips.
“I’m not sure what got you over your fear, but I’m glad.”
“Time. I think time can be an amazing thing.”
“Me too, but not as amazing as you.” I didn’t think. I leaned forward and crashed my lips into hers. There were sparks—at least it felt that way to me. Her lips were soft and eager, and I pushed my way into her mouth. I needed more of her. I soaked up her taste. Savoring every second as I pulled her into my arms. I never wanted to let go of her again.
I was still grinning like a fool months later when we put the finishing touches on our family hut on the far side of the Glen.
“I don’t like that Kayla and Faith can’t stay with us.” Quinn was happy, but as usual, she was also worried about her sister and niece. I didn’t blame her. I was too. I’d considered them family for a long time, but that had only continued to deepen as Quinn and I moved our relationship further.
“I know. I keep petitioning.” I tried pulling every string I had, but it did nothing. There were some rules in the Glen that no one would break.
“If she would have only chosen Bolton before it was too late—” Quinn stopped herself. “I know that’s awful to say now that he’s married. But still. They could have been happy.”
“It’s still strange to hear you say you wish Kayla was with Bolton. You used to, well, you know how you used to feel about him.” I never liked their arguing, but I understood it. I also understood why her feelings about him had changed. Even I had grown to appreciate him.
“But he’s a good man. I know Kayla loves Mason, but he’s never coming. There is no way he will ever find her here.” Quinn knit her hands together. “She deserves to be happy. She doesn’t need to play the martyr. Maybe one day she’ll pick someone else.”
“But you know as well as I do that what she deserves doesn’t change anything when it comes to her decisions.”
“But a family unit would be better for Faith than the bunk houses, and I know Kayla loves Faith more than anything.”
“But she’s stubborn. Just as you can be.”
“Me?” She put a hand to her chest. “Stubborn?”
I laughed. “And yes, I know it is much like the pot calling the kettle black. I can be plenty stubborn myself.”
“Yes. You most definitely can.”
“But back to Kayla…” I trailed off.
“Yes, back to Kayla. I wish I could make her see.”
“You can’t make her do or see anything.”
“I know. I’m only venting.” She went back to hanging up a set of curtains she’d made herself.
“And venting is always fine.” I put my arms around her waist from behind.
“I don’t deserve you.”
“Of course, you do.” She leaned back into me.
“I don’t. Bailey and I. We are so lucky to have found you.”
“And I am so lucky to have found both of you. And your crazy sister and her daughter.”
“I am going to tell her you said that.”
“Please leave off the whole crazy part.”
“Why? That’s the best part.” Quinn laughed. It was a light, beautiful laugh.
“Yeah but it’s true, so please don’t tell the crazy one that I called her that.”
Quinn turned in my arms so she was looking at me. “I know you care about her.”
“Of course, I do. I’ve gained so much since meeting you.”
“You saved us.” Quinn put her hands on my shoulders. “Bailey and I would have never made it out of Central if you hadn’t taken a chance on us.”
“And the same could be said for me. Yo
u snapped me out of my insane daze. I did horrible things—I followed orders blindly. As I said, I don’t deserve you. I don’t deserve this.” I gestured to our new home, but I meant more than that. I meant our life together.
Quinn shook her head. “Yet you changed. You risked everything for a woman and child you barely knew.”
“Because you had my heart from the moment I met you.”
“The moment?” She raised an eyebrow.
“Yes. It skipped a beat, and I knew there was no way I could ever let you go.”
“You sure didn’t show that at first.”
I shrugged. “I never said I was the best at expressing myself, or that I moved my thoughts into action very quickly.”
“Mother! Father!” Bailey ran inside. She put her hands on her knees clearly trying to catch her breath.
“What’s going on?”
“They found people. Newcomers!” Bailey ran back outside.
My heart surged as it always did when Bailey called me Father. I may not have been her father biologically, but I’d do anything for that little girl.
Twenty-Five
Mason
We left the lab and wandered around the area. Everywhere we went we found more corpses. Nearly every one of them wore the same uniform—or variation of it. The only exceptions were older bodies, further along in decomposition and who were probably killed by the newer blood. Each set was the same. It was as if they’d fallen down suddenly. There was never a sign of struggle. No blood. Just a body.
I’d seen plenty of strange things in my life, but nothing like that. This almost seemed like something Central would pull off, but it was against Central, not orchestrated by it.
“There’s only one more place to go.” Denver rose from where he’d been kneeling while he observed a corpse.
“Back to Central?” I didn’t need to ask the question. It was the only real possibility.
“Yes.” Denver brushed off the sand clinging to the knees of his pants.
“We’ll do what we have to do.” Addison zipped up her jacket. “We have no other choice. But we can’t leave the kids.”
Conflicted (The Corded Saga Book 3) Page 13