“He’s speechless, all right.” I scowl over at my old self, and it’s a genuine reaction to this new, unimproved version of myself.
Logan looks to Ethan and Drake as if looking for help.
Drake shakes his head. “The dude doesn’t care. Just make sure you’re wearing the right outfit when the two of you lock yourself in the bathroom right after the ceremony.”
Em grunts, “Gross.”
Rory waves him off. “Logan loves it. And we’re not supposed to lock ourselves in the bathroom, are we?” She cringes at the thought. “And what’s the right thing to wear for that, anyway?”
“Nothing,” Ethan replies. “He wants you good and naked.”
Mia and Melissa wander into the room and moan because they clearly heard the tasteless joke. Not that it isn’t true. Logan does prefer me in the nude, as I do him. I can’t help it. It’s our best look together.
Mia glides past me on her way to Rory.
“Crap, Skyla.” Mia all but swats her. “You took Tad’s credit card and you bought that tacky thing to wear to your wedding?”
Mom leans in. “For the record, all of our credit cards have been frozen by the FTC. This was purchased from Demetri’s credit card. He’s been nice enough to put me on his account.”
A dull huff evicts from my throat. “Oh, this just gets better.”
Tad lifts a finger. “Don’t worry. I plan on paying back every red cent to my good friend Demeet. In fact, he said he’d gladly pick up the tab for tonight’s rehearsal dinner.”
“And”—Mom kisses Jaxson before handing my beautiful boy off to Logan—“he gave us carte blanche to pick up a few new threads ourselves to wear tonight and to the wedding.” She links arms with Tad. “And we are going shopping.”
Mia and Melissa gasp at the thought of shiny new accouterments on Demetri’s dime.
Melissa snatches her purse off the sofa table. “I’m in.”
“Yup.” Mia snatches up her purse, too. “I might just sneak in a couple new pairs of shoes and some serious bling while I’m at it. It is my sister’s wedding, after all. It’s practically illegal for me not to put my best foot forward.”
I nod her way. “You might want to stock up for your own wedding, too. You never know when Demetri will revoke the offer.”
“Dude.” Melissa nods. “Is it too early to shop for my wedding? I just know Gabe is going to pop the question soon.”
Mia makes a face. “That’s one sloppy second I’m glad you took off my plate. Hey? I know. We should buy dresses and accessories to wear to each other’s weddings, too!”
Bree coos, “Aw! That’s so sweet.”
I manufacture a sigh myself. “I just love it when people spend all of Demetri’s never-earned money. What the heck, Mia—pick up a little bauble for me, too.”
Mom rolls her eyes. “We’ll see you all tonight at the rehearsal dinner. I just can’t believe this is happening. Oh, and Skyla? Feel free to wear something cheeky for the run-through tonight. Lexy says it’s fine to be as tacky as you want during rehearsal. She said it helps some people ease their nerves.”
The only thing that will ease my nerves is a little celestial switcheroo taking place before the big day.
Mom and Tad take off, and half the room drains with them.
Bree decides to get her nails done and does a disappearing act. It’s just faux Skyla, Logan, Emily, and me—and the littles, of course.
Rory looks my way. “Don’t worry, Chloe. I know why you’re standing around. You’re invited to the rehearsal dinner tonight, too. You might want to get ready. It’s not a fancy place, but you can do better than those old ratty sweatpants.” She gives a little wink my way.
“I’ll wear a dress.” I give a quick look around. “You want me to start blowing up balloons or something? Picking up a few toys off the ground? Wash the dishes? It doesn’t look very festive around here.”
Rory chortles, and I try to resist the urge to grab a cleaver out of the kitchen to hack her head off with it. The sound of my own voice is grating on my nerves.
Welcome to the club, Messenger.
No kidding, I say. And all these years, I just thought you were mean. Come to find out, you were merely trying to survive.
Rory rolls her eyes. “We’re not having the party here, Chloe. What kind of a hillbilly do you think I am?” She giggles. “Em taught me that.” She gives a sly wink. “Brielle got Logan to tell her the name of the restaurant we had our first date at and we booked it there.”
A breath hitches in my throat and I hold it. Logan steps over to her and nods.
“That’s right, Chloe.” He glances at Rory in her obnoxious throwback of a wedding dress and I’d swear he looks a touch depressed. “It’s the same place Skyla and I went to when we first started dating, but they sold the place and the new owners have changed the name to The Matador. Skyla and I have quite a few memories there.”
That we do. I nod his way as tears begin to sting my eyes.
Rory swats Logan on the back. “Come on. We need to get downtown and pick out some new clothes before Demetri takes the card away from Tad. I want new shoes and boots, and some coats. It’s so awfully cold here. We’re going to move soon after the wedding. I don’t know why people bother living in this drudgery.” She picks up her dress and heads for the hall. “I’ll be right back!”
“I think I’ll stay behind and help Em with the kids,” he calls out after her.
“Have fun,” I whisper as I sneak a quick kiss to Jaxson’s forehead and little Barron comes up and gives me a swift kick to the shin.
“Dat’s my dinosaur. You can’t eat her!”
“Him,” I correct. “And I don’t eat babies.”
“That’s right.” Em comes in and snorts “She eats naughty boys.”
Both Barron and Nathan begin to scream with delight and incite the rest of the miniature crew to do the same.
“Sorry,” I mouth to Logan. “I guess I’ll see you tonight.” I give a little wink.
“Where are you off to?” he calls out.
“Let’s just say I’ve got a surprise brewing.”
I hop into Chloe’s death trap of a car and head straight toward the north side of town where Dominique Winters’ apothecary sits nestled between a vitamin shop and a smoothie place.
I head on in and can’t help but note the dark and depressing décor. Walls of old dusty books line the shelves and look as if they’ve been around for two hundred years, and there are miniature Mason jars filled with sprigs and powders lined up on shelves behind the counter.
This place gives me the creeps. I’m pretty sure this is what the inside of a witch’s anus looks like, Messenger, Chloe grunts, never shy to tell me how she feels.
Yes, well, desperate times call for desperate witches, I tell her just as an older woman wearing a purple shawl emerges from the back.
“Dominique,” I say as I lift my chin. It’s her, all right. She’s a redheaded beauty with a dark mole just below her left cheek, and she’s a looker no matter how many centuries she’s managed to finagle herself into.
“Chloe Bishop.” She rolls her eyes dismissively. “Let me guess, poison for Skyla? It never ends with you two. Demetri has filled me in on the little row you girls have going.”
“I’d hardly call it little, but as it stands we’re on the same side.” I stop cold. Technically, I am here to kill Skyla, but Dominique doesn’t need to know that.
“What can I do you for?” She pulls the shawl off her head, unleashing long luscious curls. Boy is my mother lucky Demetri is obsessed with her. I know for a fact Dominique has made an outward play for the demon. Honestly, she and Demetri would make a dastardly pairing. A wicked supernatural power couple if ever there was one. It’s probably best my mother holds him over in the blue-ball zone for as long as she can. Although judging by those early mornings I’ve seen him ducking out of the Landon house, that spring in his horny step, he’s in the end zone scoring touchdowns night after night.
/> How I hate him.
“I need something strong,” I tell her. “Something that could knock out a horse. Something that might actually have the power to stop the beating heart of a five-foot-five, one hundred and forty pound female. Oh, what the heck, let’s make it a two hundred and twenty pound man.” I figure while I’m trying to knock my own body into the next world, I might as well go for the gold and try to off Demetri, too. I have no idea how much Demetri weighs or if he could feel pain, but it sure will be fun trying. I probably won’t do a thing to Demetri, but at least the thought of it brings me a little joy.
She shoots me a wry smile. “I knew we’d have fun the second I saw you standing there.” She turns to the glass jar behind her. “Our best bet will be to mix a few herbs with nightshade. I’ve got a proprietary blend I’ve used time and time again.”
“How many people have you offed with your lotions and potions, Dom? It’s just us girls here, you can tell me.”
Chloe chortles. I think you’re getting the hang of being me. And just for the record, I’d double the dose of whatever she suggests if I were really going to kill you.
I snort. Good to know you wouldn’t go easy on me.
That is me going easy on you. Poison isn’t a part of my fantasy when disposing of you from this planet, Messenger.
I make a face. Then why help me at all?
She laughs openly. Because, my dear nitwit, I love Celestra more than I hate you.
A sigh expels from me. Same here, Chloe. Same here.
Dominique spins back around and pulls out a small paper bag before dropping in a few dry ingredients.
“It’s not lethal to inhale,” she says. “Might give you a headache, though.”
“So what’s the best way to distribute this?” I ask as my heart begins to palpitate within me.
My heart, Chloe corrects. Let’s not get carried away. You’re a tenant, not a landlord.
Dominique gives me a curious look as if she heard Chloe’s commentary.
“I like to call this special blend no mercy. It’s best ingested, but since there’s a bit of roughage to it, I’d suggest baking your victim something sweet to eat. Sugar will mask the flavor easily. Perhaps brownies?” She rings it up, and I quickly fork over Chloe’s credit card.
Crap, Messenger, Chloe balks. Two hundred and fifty bucks?
Dominique nods my way and winks. “Murder never comes cheap. I suppose I’ll see you at the wedding then?”
“Why, yes, you will.”
I don’t ask who invited Dominique. With Rory in charge, I’m sure the questions are never-ending.
Instead, I drive from boutique to boutique in search of something to wear to my own wedding outside of a wedding dress, and then it hits me.
I’m sure as hell not wearing that eighties clown outfit when I walk down the aisle, I say to Chloe. I’ll need a real wedding dress. And I’ll have to find you something to wear, too.
Oh hell, Skyla. I couldn’t care less. Find me a bathrobe. Just focus on yourself. We still have to get ready for that rehearsal dinner fiasco.
I nod. You’re so right. Where should I go?
She grunts, The Enchanted Closet has an entire cache of emergency wedding dresses in the back. Lexy says they’re for customers, but the truth is, she’s keeping them around in the event some idiot crops up in her life and pops the question.
God bless Lexy and her delusions of grandeur, I say as I hightail us over to the Enchanted Closet where I find both Lexy and Michelle staring at their phones.
“What’s up, Bishop?” Lex says without bothering to look up.
“Where are those emergency wedding dresses you have stashed here?”
She hops off her stool and leads the way to the back, and Michelle is in hot pursuit as well.
“What do you need it for?” Michelle sounds a twinge jealous. She’s been on an emotional low ever since she split with Liam. And, ironically, Lexy has been on an emotional high ever since she started dating Liam.
I’m not really liking Liam all that much right about now. I may not be close to Lex or Michelle, but I don’t really care for what he’s up to. As far as the Oliver men are involved, I’ve got a bigger fish to fry. I’d say dick, but I wouldn’t want it to come across as an inadvertent compliment.
Ooh. Chloe sounds as if she’s getting excited. We should take a moment to discuss Gage Oliver’s baseball bat.
“No,” I say it out loud without meaning to.
Michelle clucks her tongue. “Okay. Nobody said you need to buy the first dress you see.”
“Let’s be real,” I say. “I’m not buying a thing.”
Chloe titters. Now there’s something I’d say. You can remind them I’m a part owner. Don’t take any bullshit, Messenger.
“Right,” I mutter as Michelle pulls out a rolling rack from the back and I gasp at all the pretty pastel glittering gowns. But one in particular sets my heart on edge. “This one,” I say, pulling forth a gleaming white gown that borders on gray with a ballerina neckline, thin spaghetti straps, full-length tulle skirt, and just enough beads and crystals that dot the front to give it an ethereal glow. “This is the dress.”
“Nope. Sorry, Chloe.” Lexy plucks it out of my grasp and lands it back on the rack. “That’s my dress. What do you want it for, anyway?”
“What do you want it for?” I smear the words with attitude. I must admit, there is something liberating to be as big a bitch as I care to be, especially around Lexy Bakova. She’s been a thorn in my side for far too long, and I’ve been nice every inch of the way.
Chloe belts out a laugh. Oh hell, Mess. Go ahead and slap her a few times if you want. I don’t really give a shit.
I might just take Chloe up on that offer.
I snatch the dress back and land it on a rack closer to me as I continue to inspect it, falling in love with this thing of beauty ever so much more with each passing second.
Lexy snorts. “Liam will propose one day, and I thought this would be the perfect wedding dress.”
I grunt in lieu of response. “You’re right about the perfect wedding dress. But it’s not for you.”
Lexy scoffs. “And you think it’s for you?”
“It’s for Messenger.”
“What?” both Lexy and Michelle bark in unison.
“No way.” Lex holds a hand out as if to stop me. “I’ve seen her wedding mess of a dress. She’s got no taste, and I really don’t care. She’s not getting near this masterpiece.”
Michelle squints over at me. “Why in the hell do you care what she wears?”
Yeah, Mess? Chloe laughs. Boy, you really know how to get yourself into a pickle.
I think on it for a moment. “She asked me to pick up a spare. So relax, Lex. She may not even wear it. She’s worried those brats of hers will spill something fruity on her gown before kickoff. And you know how anal she is—she insisted on a backup at the very last minute. Bree and Laken said they couldn’t do it in time, Laken has an entire herd of brats of her own—mine included, and, well, Bree probably has to suck Drake’s dick or something equally irrelevant.”
Bravo, Bravo, Messenger. Chloe cheers. Dare I say you’re falling in love with the freedom of being me? Ten bucks says you’ll hesitate to leave when given the chance.
I give a hard blink. You wish.
Lex shakes her head and plucks out a hot pink number. “Bring this. Mess is essentially an emotional three-year-old. She’ll probably ditch her proper gown and wear this bubblegum disaster instead.”
“You’re probably right,” I muse. And I’m talking about Rory. I glare over at Lex a moment for the slight she just inadvertently dispensed my way. “And in keeping with your line of thinking, she won’t want to wear this one.” I point to the thing of beauty. “I’ll have it back at the shop the next day untouched, and you can wear it wherever the hell you want.”
“No,” Lexy wails. “Liam might see it. Hell, everyone might see it and they’ll think I’m wearing one of Skyla’s casto
ffs. It’s bad enough I couldn’t have Logan. She’s not getting my dress.”
“She’s getting the dress.” I bare my fangs. “And yes, Lex, she gets Logan, too. Logan is her soulmate. You knew that back in high school, and that never stopped you from pursuing him.”
Her mouth falls open, and her copper hair swings around the base of her neck like a sickle.
“Are you even listening to yourself?” Her chest bucks as she glances back at Michelle. “How hard should I kick her ass?” She reverts her anger back to me. “What about your little obsession with her husband? Gage Oliver? Face it, Chloe. Skyla came into town and stole both of our men. And neither of them bothered to look at us ever again. And when you finally cast a spell on Gage and he married you”—she says married in air quotes—“he still rejected you. It was Skyla his body was crying out for. No matter how wide you spread your legs, you couldn’t get him to fall into that bear trap of yours. And if there’s one thing Chloe Bishop can’t stand, it’s being number two to anyone. And yet you’ve been less than zero since Skyla came to Paragon.”
My right hand whips through the air and wallops Lexy over the face so hard I felt a pop in her jaw as she sails into a sea of fluffy tulle.
“Oh my God, Lexy!” I cry out as I try to help her up and Michelle gives me a hard shove to the chest.
“Just get out of here, Bishop,” Michelle growls. “You were both going too far. It always ends this way. It’s like the two of you will never learn.”
Always?
Always, Chloe admits.
I snatch the dress off the rack and bolt for the door. I drive it straight to Whitehorse, but I don’t put that dress into the downstairs den that is slowly being transformed into a bridal suite. I carry it upstairs and bury it in the back of the master closet behind Logan’s suits and winter coats. I can’t risk Rory falling in love with my wedding dress. No, she needs to breathe her last in the catastrophe she’s chosen for herself.
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