Beau choked on his iced tea.
PJ was starting to suspect his parents were playing footsie under the table. She was also starting to suspect Nadine might reign supreme when it came to giving the Colonel crap.
But then Lily opened her mouth and all bets were off. “I’m gonna have to skip dessert, Daddy. I’m heading over to Penny’s for the weekend. We’ve got a thing.”
“A thing?” The Colonel wiped his mouth with a napkin, sharp eyes swinging to his daughter.
Lily lowered the phone she’d been glued to all evening and smiled sweetly. “Now, Daddy, I told you about this moonlight mixer months ago. Let’s not make it a big deal. Magda’s right. We really shouldn’t test those triglycerides.”
PJ didn’t have the first clue what triglycerides were, but she was fairly certain Lily was about to test the Colonel’s because the man’s face had soured as soon as she’d uttered the words “moonlight” and “mixer.” Beau’s had too, his lips pinching slightly as he buttered another roll for his son.
Max, however, looked intrigued. “What’s a moonlight mixer?” he asked, side-eying the sky through the windows surrounding the large enclosed patio where they were dining.
Beau followed his son’s gaze to the pale glow of the moon, his face relaxing in a smile as he discerned the very literal direction of his son’s thoughts. “It’s a type of party,” he whispered before leaning down to kiss the messy crown of his son’s curls.
PJ had never really understood the whole “ovaries exploding” thing until that exact second. In point of fact, she’d never really given much thought to the state of her ovaries before. But they sure seemed to be telling her something now, and it didn’t have a damn thing to do with Lily’s stupid mixer. It was more of a “Well, hello there, future baby daddy.” And this was one crazy-ass delusion, PJ had no business entertaining—
“Ow! Dang it, Lils!”
PJ snapped backed to reality to find Beau wincing. His cousin, having clearly engaged in a more aggressive form of foot action under the table, was scowling.
“Can you not say the p-word?” she hissed at him.
The Colonel sipped at his tea, watching his daughter shrewdly for a moment before settling back in his chair at the head of the table. “Well now, why don’t you remind me about this thing again, darlin’? It must have slipped my mind with all the commotion in California.”
“Could’ve helped y’all with that commotion in California,” Lily muttered sulkily.
The Colonel lowered his glass, his expression deceptively calm. “We’ve been over this before, sugar bee. We didn’t know what we were flying into when we left to find that missing girl. Finn can tell you these things don’t always turn out so well.”
The steely eyed vet beside him didn’t say a word. He didn’t have to. PJ could tell by the man’s shuttered expression that Finneus Browning had seen all kinds of unhappy endings during his time on the force. Old Finn had run a search and rescue team for years before retiring.
“You had your exams at school… your writing,” the Colonel continued. “There was no sense in dragging you into something potentially dangerous.”
“But you dragged her,” Lily said quietly, her gaze shifting from her father to PJ and back.
The Colonel’s jaw tightened, a spark of anger flashing in his eyes as they registered the convicting tone of her words. Beau stiffened as well, his expression growing unreadable. The tension at the table was suddenly palpable. The only ones unaffected by it seemed to be Nadine, who was enjoying the hell out of her sherry, and Max, who was lining up Splenda packets on the table.
PJ wasn’t sure how to feel. Was she supposed to be pissed at the Colonel? What the hell for? It wasn’t like he’d locked his daughter in her ivory tower at home while flying PJ off to some war-torn country in Iraq. That’s not what had happened. Not by a long shot. The truth was, she’d been suspended from boarding school, locked out of her mom’s apartment with Francine off on holiday, and the Colonel had been the only one to come to her rescue. The next morning his estranged brother had called to say his son’s girlfriend had gone missing, and PJ had jumped at the chance to get out of Baton Rouge… and go hang out with Beau. End of story.
PJ knocked back the rest of her Shirley, set the glass down, and leveled her former stepsister with a “don’t haul me into your shitshow” look. “First off, no one drags me anywhere. Not unless they enjoy bleeding. Second” — PJ jabbed a finger at the Colonel — “that man’s not my father. He’s yours. I’m well aware of that fact, and my little old heart isn’t crying a river because you’re his princess and I’m not—”
“PJ—” Beau cut in warningly as Lily grew more and more rigid with every word.
But PJ wasn’t done. Not by a long shot. “Thirdly, how about we get back to the topic at hand?” She leaned closer to the girl now glaring at her. “And while we’re at it, how about you ovary up. If you want to go to a party, just say you’re going to a party. You’re twenty flipping years old, not twelve—”
“What’s your problem?” Lily seethed.
“Oh, I don’t have a problem. I’d say you’re the one with the problem. ‘Cause it doesn’t really look like the Colonel is buying this moonlight mixer bullsh—”
“Enough!” The Colonel slapped his hand on the table.
“Enough!” Max slapped his hand on the sugar packets. “Enough! Enough!”
“Yes, Max.” Beau placed a calming hand on his son’s back, his gaze darkening as it fell on her. “That’s enough.”
PJ bristled at his tone but wisely held her tongue.
Nadine did not. “Finn and I have been to some mixers recently. They were a hoot.” She patted Grayson’s arm. “And don’t worry, I’m sure the kiddos will be keeping their clothes on for this one.”
Lily groaned as the Colonel snatched up Nadine’s sherry and downed the rest of it in one gulp. “I’m sure you’re right,” he said, feigning a smile. “I guess I’ll allow it—”
Lily smiled just as sweetly. “I wasn’t asking for permission, Daddy—”
“—so long as you take Watson.”
“What?!” PJ couldn’t hide a smirk as Lily shot to her feet. “I’m not taking your bodyguard to Cleo’s party! It’s in the Hills, for crying out loud. Since when do I need security detail in my own neighborhood!”
PJ stopped smiling, an uneasy feeling settling in her gut as she quickly connected the dots. Cleo was Troy’s older sister. Troy was Wade’s best friend. Wade was going to a house party during spring break. Wade was looking to hook up with Lily. “Are you freaking kidding me? This is that party!” she cried before she could stop herself.
Every eye at the table was suddenly on her, most notable of which were Beau’s as he frowned at her from two feet away. “Got something you want to share, Prudence?”
She should. She should definitely share. She should tell the Brownings about Wade’s stupid trash talking and put an end to this crap once and for all. They’d lock the princess up in her tower and put the hurt locker on Wade, and PJ could walk away with a clear conscience. She should tell them.
Only she couldn’t. The words were stuck in her head, right along with the ghosts.
Go ahead and say something. I dare you.
Bile burned its way up PJ’s throat, red spreading over her cheeks as she remembered that hiss of a whisper. She wasn’t wearing enough makeup. PJ clawed at her hair, trying to sweep it in front of her face, but she’d worn it in a stupid ponytail, and the voice was still in her head. The laughter.
You think someone might actually believe a bitch like you?
The Colonel’s soft drawl brought her back to the present. “By all means, lemon drop, share with the classroom…”
PJ lifted her gaze from the napkin she hadn’t realized she’d been suffocating to find Lily watching her with an odd expression, like maybe the girl was a little concerned for her. And this wasn’t good, because if Lily, who wasn’t her friend any more than she was her sister, could
actually see behind PJ’s carefully constructed mask, then what could Beau see right now?
PJ schooled her expression, willing her entire body to relax as she avoided his gaze. “Nah,” she managed with a half-hearted shrug. “I got nothin’.”
“Great.” Lily shoved back from the table and snatched up her phone.
“Well, maybe, I do have a few things—”
“Jesus!”
“Lilith Mabel Browning! You will not slander the Lord’s name at this table,” Nadine cried, waving her empty sherry glass around like a scepter.
“Sorry, Nana-dine.” Lily offered the woman a contrite smile before turning back to PJ with impatience. “You got two seconds.”
“Yeah, no worries.” PJ reached for the backpack she’d sat near her chair. “Just wanted to say that if you’re dead set on going to this mixer, then maybe you should borrow my pepper spray. I hear the date rape statistics are one in six—”
“That does it! You’re not going.” This was from the Colonel.
“What’s a satistic?” This was from Max.
“What the hell!” This was from Lily. She threw up her hands as she glared daggers at PJ. “First, you’re all like ‘just go to the party’ and then you’re quoting me RAINN stats?! What gives, Manny D? Are you mental or something—”
“Careful,” Beau cut in, the hard edge to his voice silencing his cousin’s rant. She looked at him. Then she looked back at PJ. Then her lips pursed together a second before she stalked away.
“Whatever. I’m outta here.”
“Cool beans,” PJ called after her. “Just remember, red plastic cup equals roofie, and never use the bathroom up the stairs!”
“You are not going to that party!” The Colonel bellowed.
Lily swung back around near a set of sliding glass doors. “Fine, Daddy. I’ll be at Penny’s the whole weekend doing counted cross stitch and baking brownies. Later.”
“Ooh, I do love brownies.” Nadine rattled the ice cubes in her empty glass, and Old Finn dutifully filled it up with more sherry. “Now, I wonder where Mags is with that cake.”
Chapter 14
PJ didn’t say much on the drive home. As soon as they’d left the Colonel’s, she’d climbed right back into the car next to Max, and the two had quickly become engrossed in another game on his tablet. Beau didn’t think she was still upset about their argument earlier. If anything, PJ had seemed more rattled by the drama at dinner, and Beau couldn’t shake the feeling that she was keeping something from him. Something important. So when he pulled into PJ’s apartment and parked near her mother’s Acura, Beau turned around with the full intention of getting to the bottom of things, but the sight that greeted him in the backseat brought him up short.
Max was passed out, his head lolled against PJ’s arm as he drooled on her sweater. PJ was busy with his tablet, clearly unfazed by the growing wet spot on her sleeve. “Let me just save this game,” she said. “He won’t want to lose it.”
He wouldn’t. Max took his gaming seriously, and the fact that PJ not only recognized this, but seemed to wholeheartedly approve had Beau smiling as she fiddled with the little machine.
“Did you know your boy’s on level fifty of Quackulators? That’s like second grade addition already, and he’s only in preschool. He might be a prodigy. You should probably have him tested. He’s super smart—” PJ stopped chattering when she looked up and caught him staring. Rolling her eyes, she powered off the tablet and set it down on the seat with a nervous laugh. “Of course, you know that.”
“I do.” Beau glanced at his slobbering son with a mixture of pride and amusement. “Nice to be reminded of it though. It’s easy to get stuck thinking about all the challenges he’s gonna face as he gets older. At least this is one thing I won’t have to worry about.”
“No doubt. This kid’s got the math thing on lock. He’s got some kind of crazy beautiful mind hiding under all this hair.” PJ leaned down and plopped a kiss on his son’s crown. Beau followed the movement of her mouth with the strangest sense of déjà vu… and no small amount of awareness that his own lips had touched that same spot earlier.
PJ straightened, her nostrils flaring. “He smells like you.” Her voice was husky, a flush stealing over her skin.
“That a good thing?” Beau asked without thinking.
“It is,” she answered without hesitation.
Awareness morphed into something headier, something Beau had no business feeling, but no power to stop.
“I should probably go,” she said.
Beau didn’t want her to. He wanted to give in to his growing fantasies about this girl for just one minute, to wonder about her lips and if they tasted as sinful as they looked, to imagine all the red she’d slathered on them staining his mouth. Just one kiss. He could allow himself that. A kiss wasn’t statutory. But it was fucking stupid.
“Yeah,” he said finally, “you probably should.” Because if there wasn’t a seat and a snoring five year old between them, Beau would have been on her in a heartbeat.
And she knew it too. PJ’s gaze dropped, her expression slightly flustered as she tried to detach from the child clinging to her. “Okay. Let me just” — Max let out a sleepy whimper of protest as PJ managed to slip her arm out of his grasp — “get this dude sorted.” She shimmied out of her sweater, balled it up, and shoved it into his newly emptied hands. Max accepted the substitution, hugging the hoodie like a teddy bear as he resumed his snoring. “You go on and hold that for me,” she said wryly. “I have a feeling your daddy’s gonna be giving me another ride pretty soon.”
Beau didn’t miss the way her eyes sparkled when she leaned down to collect her bag. He also didn’t miss the way her shirt rode up with her movements, once again exposing a teasing stretch of skin and that flash of bling at her belly. This time Beau couldn’t tear his gaze from her piercing, nor could he stop himself from asking another question he had no business asking as he recognized the whimsical little mermaid dangling from it. “When did you get that?” he whispered gruffly.
She had one hand on the door as she shot him a siren’s smile that went straight to his cock. “Couple hours after I had sex for the first time.” There wasn’t an ounce of regret in her eyes as PJ slipped from his car and danced into the night. “Night, Double A.”
Beau watched her go with a dry mouth and a rapidly growing erection. When she was safely back in her apartment, he slammed his head down on his steering wheel and wondered what the hell he was doing with this girl.
***
Fifteen minutes later, after tucking Max into bed, stripping out of his clothes, and stepping into his first cold shower in years, Beau was still wondering the same thing.
After the water torture, Beau found himself staring at the burgundy sweater his son had dropped on the living room floor. Beau scooped it up and brought it to his face, breathing in a hint of the spicy gum PJ favored, as well as something that was uniquely hers. Some wildly undefinable scent that had his dick swelling all over again, tenting the towel wrapped around his hips as he moved on autopilot to his room. Sinking down on the edge of his bed, Beau closed his eyes and tried not to do what his body wanted so badly for him to do.
But in the end, he just didn’t have the willpower. Beau ripped off his towel, palmed his dick, and with the mysterious salty-sweet scent of PJ teasing his nose, he simply gave into the inevitable. It didn’t take more than five or six strokes before he was spilling into the soft burgundy fabric covering his thighs.
About fifteen seconds after shooting his load like a desperate teenager, Beau was rather certain he was going to hell. About fifteen seconds after coming to this conclusion, Beau was dumping PJ’s sweater into a high-efficiency washing machine and firing off a text to the one guy he hoped might be able to save him from eternal damnation.
Beau: You still got Melinda’s number?
Elias: River run?
Beau: Hell no, you idgit. It’s the last week of March.
Elias: Boo.
Beau: Just thought I’d take her out to coffee.
Elias: Boo.
Beau: Maybe we can hit the river next month.
Melinda Sandu’s contact info popped up on the screen. Beau lowered the phone in his hand and stared at the laundry swirling around in the wash. This was for the best. PJ was completely wrong for him. She was too young. Too wild. And way too unstable to be any sort of mother figure to his child.
Wasn’t she?
Beau frowned as he lay down that night, PJ’s saucy parting words messing with his head, the image of Max clinging to her side messing with his heart. Sometime before Beau finally drifted off, it occurred to him that outside of himself and his ex, he’d never once seen his kid cuddle like that with anyone else.
Chapter 15
PJ’s sheets smelled like one big self-induced orgasm the next morning. Dinah was sniffing around them as PJ sat up with a yawn, then grimaced at the funk. “Jesus, Di. Stop that.” The cat was licking the little purple vibrator lying next to her e-reader. “That’s just wrong. Now I have to sterilize it.”
Dinah didn’t appear the slightest bit sorry.
PJ turned to her nightstand, staring bleary-eyed at her clock. It was already well past noon. She should have been up hours ago reading more nonfiction so she could pass her exam at Journeys and become a productive member of society. Instead, she’d been up half the night reading the latest Lyken Lust novella and imagining an entire wolf pack of Beaus licking every inch of her body. Which had really only been productive in terms of her pussy.
“Damn that chick’s filthy mind!” PJ kicked off her covers, rose from the bed, and rummaged through the chest of drawers across from it. Jerking on a clean pair of panties and some yoga pants to go with her tank top, PJ turned back to her cat and glared at the rumpled sheets where Dinah was busy investigating her most recent e-book download. “Flipping Britni Howling! This is all her fault, you know.”
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