by Elle Wright
“Can we stop now?” I bent low, hands on my knees, gasping for breath.
“No, we can’t,” Paityn chirped.
I peered up at my now-jogging-in-place sister, who looked like she’d just stepped off the runway with her soft, short curls and cute outfit. “You’re killing me.” I coughed. Damn, why can’t I breathe?
“Obviously, you need to work out, Sissy.” Tyn stretched before segueing into a set of lunges. “What happened to you?”
“I knew I should’ve stayed my ass home.” I glared at my big sister. Paityn had business in town and had flown in yesterday evening. She was a sight for sore, tired eyes. And since she’d come without her husband, Bishop, she’d decided to stay with me instead of my parents’ house. Blake and Bliss had come over, and we’d had a little slumber party. Just what I needed. Sister time. We’d spent the night catching up, laughing at each other and everyone else, eating Paityn’s good cooking, and strengthening our already tight bond. But now? She could get the hell up out of here with her “let’s go for a run” self.
“Come on, slow poke.” Tyn was now doing standing quads. Perky heffa. “You got this.”
Glaring at my big sister, I grumbled, “First the fuck of all, I know I got this. Second, I haven’t run in a week. I needed a slow start, a jog. Not a damn sprint.”
That slide into home had been worse for my body than I could’ve imagined. The next day, I could hardly move. My mother had brought me food and helped me clean up. It’d taken all week for me to even walk straight. Long gone were the days I could bounce back and keep it moving. And apparently, the days when I could drink all night and get up at the butt crack of dawn to run were a distant memory too.
Bliss, who’d run ahead of us minutes ago, circled back around. Another one who acted like she could do this all day. Looking at her, I’d never know she’d given birth less than six months ago. “Why’d you stop? We have pedicure appointments in a couple of hours, and I’d like to eat breakfast.” And she ate more than all of us too.
“What the hell is going on here?” Blake circled back around. “I was just talking about something important when I noticed I was alone.” She pushed Paityn. “You could’ve told me to stop running.”
Pointing at me, Paityn shrugged. “She’s tired. I stopped with her.”
“Already?” Blake glanced at her watch. “I can’t with you, Dallas. We haven’t even hit a mile. I need more steps. Duke and I are in a competition.”
“Well then, take your ass on.” I gestured for her to keep it moving. “Don’t let me stop you.” I sat down on a park bench. Needless to say, I wasn’t finishing this run. I’d already decided to walk to the smoothie place around the corner and get my favorite drink. “I can just meet y’all later.”
Bliss hugged me, catching me so off guard that I almost fell over. When she pulled back, she gave me a cheeky grin and a shrug. “Sorry to spring that on you. But you look like you need a hug.”
Even on my worst days, a hug from Bliss was always a good thing. “Thanks, Sissy,” I said.
“Any time. We should eat ice cream for breakfast.” We called her our own personal cheering section, because she rooted hard for everybody “Young.” Bliss was the heart of our family. Loving and genuinely kind, giving and positive. I loved the hell out of her.
Tyn sat next to me. “You two go on. I’ll stay with Dallas.”
“Sure?” Blake asked.
Paityn nodded. “We’ll meet you back at the house.”
Blake and Bliss took off, leaving me alone with Paityn.
“Are you really okay, Dallas?”
While Bliss was the heart, Paityn was the nurturer. She’d always considered herself Momma 2.0. And all of us agreed, even Tristan. Whenever we needed something, whether it was a place to hide or a peach cobbler, she had us covered. A couple of years ago, she’d made the decision to put herself and her dreams first and had moved to California. After a few short weeks on the west coast, she’d met the love of her life. I’d never seen her happier, but I missed her terribly.
“I’m good,” I told her. “A lot on my mind.”
“Thinking about the brewing scandal?”
I snorted. “That shit is already brewed and poured.” Maya had set up a brunch for tomorrow so I could meet the Color of Law board members. It’d been a long time since I’d been nervous about anything, but I had teetered between making up an excuse to not attend and just telling her I wasn’t interested. “What if I’m not doing the right thing?”
She eyed me out of the corner of her eye. “You don’t even sound like yourself.”
“I know! I sound like a lil’ bitch.”
Paityn cracked up. “You sound like your ten-year-old self.”
“I don’t miss that kid.” At ten, I’d struggled to find my place in the family. Everyone seemed to have a pair. Paityn and Tristan were tight because they were the oldest. Duke and Dex were the twins, while I was the odd girl out. Blake and Bliss had each other and their twin thing. And Asa was the baby. I remembered feeling so alone in a house full of people. It wasn’t until I met Demi that things started to change for me. She became my pair.
“I do,” Paityn admitted.
I frowned. “What?”
“That kid needed me. She wasn’t afraid to show vulnerability, she wasn’t always trying to be strong, and she wasn’t fixing everyone’s life.”
I swallowed as tears filled my eyes. “Paityn, if you make me cry, I’m going to push you off this damn bench.”
She wrapped her arms around me and pulled me into a tight embrace. “I’ll stop. I love you, Sissy. I just want you to be okay.”
I leaned my forehead against her shoulder. “Why wouldn’t I be okay?”
“Because you’re so busy being Dallas Young, Marriage Broker, Badass Boss Bitch. Don’t get me wrong, I’m so proud of you. You are killin’ it out here. But I just wonder if you’re really happy.”
Pulling back, I nodded. “I am. My family makes me happy. My career makes me happy.”
“So why do you look so sad to me?”
My mouth fell open. I didn’t have words; I didn’t have an argument. And I always had an argument.
Paityn raised a challenging brow. “I get it, you love your job. But remember when Blake was too afraid to admit she was in love with Lennox? You were the main one encouraging her to do it. When I was going back and forth with my feelings for Bishop, you were right there telling me to get my shit together.”
“That’s different,” I argued. “In both cases, there was an existing relationship y’all were trying to fuck up. By the way, I’m not a novice at this psych shit. You keep trying to sneak in a therapy session, and I don’t like it. Between Bliss sending me matches and Mom introducing me to ‘nice’ young men, I’m over it. Please don’t become that older sister trying to marry her single sisters off. I thought you were better than that, Tyn.”
“That’s not what I was doing. And I’m not that much older.”
“Sounds like it to me. Right now, I’m focused on my career and I’m okay with that.”
“But what happens when you hit that goal?”
“There’s always another one,” I replied.
“What about after work?”
“Oh God, you sound like Mom.”
“I am her daughter.” Paityn bumped my shoulder with hers. “Okay, I’ll stop. I just want you happy and fulfilled.”
I blew out a slow breath. “If I decide to let someone into my heart, it’ll be when I want to do it. Until then, I’m good. I don’t need a man to feel fulfilled.”
“I never said you did. That’s not what this is about. I just haven’t seen you happy in years, not since…”
A pang of guilt nearly took my breath away. I groaned, unwilling to go any further with this conversation. I had stuff to do. “Girl! You’re a sex therapist. Stop trying to be my shrink.”
Paityn burst out laughing. “You’re silly for that.”
“Oh, I’m so serious. If you’r
e going to offer me therapy, how about you invent another B.A.D. so I can try that shit out.” My sister had successfully launched a naughty toy line. Her products were appealing to a growing number of young black men and women. I especially loved the dildo, Big Ass D, or B.A.D.
“It’s coming,” she offered. “You’ll be the first to get the prototype.”
“Thanks. Now, can we go get my smoothie? I’m thirsty.”
“Fine.” Paityn stood and pulled me to my feet. “I’m done playing Momma 2.0.”
“Good.”
It didn’t take us long to walk home after we stopped at the smoothie café. When we arrived, I noticed Maya’s car in the driveway.
“Is that Maya?” Paityn asked.
I nodded and knocked on the window. Maya jumped and motioned to her phone. Once she ended her call, she got out of the car. “Hi.” Paityn and Maya exchanged hugs. “So good to see you.”
“I know,” Tyn said. “It’s been a while.”
“We’ll have to catch up soon.” Maya glanced my way. “Have you seen this?” She held up her phone. I squinted my eyes and read the headline: who is dallas doing now?
My eyes widened when I saw the photograph. It was taken outside of my house, earlier in the week. With Preston.
Paityn leaned in, reading the small screen. “Oh, shit.”
My sister hated the word “shit.” Which meant this really was an Oh, Shit moment if she said it. “Exactly,” I murmured.
Paityn gasped. “Is that Preston?”
I shot Tyn a sidelong glare. “Yes.” I peered at Maya. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Is this your boyfriend?” Maya asked.
Shaking my head rapidly, I repeated the word no about five times before I added, “Not at all. He’s just a friend.” I’m such a freakin’ liar. That last interaction with him had proven there was more than simple friendship at play. One false move, and we would’ve been fucking again. Scuffed knee, bad hip, and all.
“Can he be your man?”
“What?” The question was asked simultaneously—by me and Tyn.
“Look, I hate to do this. But this might not be a bad thing.” Maya held up her hand. “Hear me out. What if we go with it? He’s your friend. Would he mind coming to some events, playing the role? Just until this publicity blows over.”
“Why would I do that?” I asked. “Maya, I think it’s probably best you find someone else. I’m not about that fake-romance life. And I’m not a liar.”
“It could work, though,” Paityn mused. “Besides, you wouldn’t be lying. There are sparks between you and Preston.”
“Shut up,” I grumbled.
Maya shrugged. “If there are sparks, then this might be beneficial in other ways.”
“No.”
“Just…think about it.” Maya squeezed my shoulders. “In the meantime, go into this brunch tomorrow ready to wow them.”
Maya stayed and chatted with me and Paityn for a few minutes before she left.
Back in the house, Paityn gave Blake and Bliss the rundown.
“Actually, I think it’s a good idea,” Bliss said. “I’ve always liked Preston. He’s amazing.”
“And fine as hell,” Blake added.
“I don’t care,” I shouted. “I’m not going to pretend to date him.” After spending time with Preston, I was certain he was dealing with something bigger than this. Even if it was a good idea, I didn’t want to add a farce onto his already full plate. “Besides, he… Never mind. I’m not doing it. If it isn’t in the cards for me to become a full member of this organization, so be it.”
“Is this something you want?” Paityn asked.
I pinned her with a glare. “Are we starting this again?”
“No.” She raised her hands in surrender. “Just a question.”
“Even if I didn’t want it, I’ll be damned if Kimball Payne and his phony-ass wife keep me from doing anything.”
“Sissy, answer the damn question,” Bliss pressed. “We have an appointment.”
I sat on the arm of my couch and sipped my water. Sighing, I nodded. “I do want this, but…”
“But…?” Blake motioned for me to continue.
Admittedly, I was torn. Between what I wanted and what I needed. I didn’t need the hassle of a PR campaign just to prove I was worthy. And I wouldn’t lie to make myself look better. “Never mind.” I went to my room without another word. There was no sense in talking about this. I’d already accomplished so much, and I knew I’d get where I wanted to be eventually—even without the Color of Law Organization.
Chapter Six
Make it Rain
Preston
“Nephew!”
I bent to give my Aunt Dot a kiss to her brow. “Hey, Auntie.”
I’d reached out to Aunt Dot when my mother had failed to return home, just to check in and see if she’d heard from her. While the two sisters were estranged, Dot knew all the people in their old neighborhood and all my mother’s hangouts. So, she’d quickly tracked Mom down.
For the past week, I’d received several texts from my aunt, updating me on my mother’s whereabouts. A couple of days ago, Aunt Dot had called to let me know Mom had finally made her way back home.
Aunt Dot placed her palm over mine and smiled. “It’s so good to see you, son. You look handsome as ever.” My aunt was ten years older than Mom, and they couldn’t be more different. Aunt Dot was married to a pastor and was a pillar in her community. She’d raised money for charities, conducted an annual coat drive for young kids, and spearheaded the church missionary department. She’d traveled all over, visiting multiple countries to provide aid to disadvantaged adults and youth. And she didn’t drink, not even a wine cooler.
I flipped my palm over and held her hand. “And you look beautiful as always, Auntie.”
Growing up, Aunt Dot had offered me a safe place, somewhere to go when I’d needed a break from my mother. Aunt Dot had even opened up her home multiple times for me to live with her. Luckily, she’d lived on the next block so I’d had easy access to her house. When the situation called for it, she’d come get me and wait for my mother to go into treatment. My mother would inevitably do just that but would always fall off the wagon. Always. It was a vicious cycle, one that had taken a toll on me. As soon as I’d been old enough to have a say, though, I’d decided to stay in the house with Mom, because I felt someone had to be there. Even after I’d done that, my aunt made sure she helped me as much as possible, which I appreciated.
“How is she?” I asked after the waitress took our drink order.
Once a month, I treated my aunt to brunch at The Gandy Dancer in Ann Arbor. It was my way of thanking her for everything she’d done for me. Because, real talk, if she hadn’t been there, I wouldn’t be here.
My aunt let out a heavy sigh. “According to Rod Pierce, she hasn’t left the house since she returned. He’s seen some delivery cars out front, but that’s it. What happened?”
Telling my aunt about my mother’s revelation wasn’t something I wanted to do over the phone. Every time she’d asked me any questions about what had transpired between me and my mom, I’d told her I’d fill her in at brunch. “I went to see her last weekend,” I explained. “She was…” I shook my head, trying to shake the image of the house out of my mind. “She was hungover, disheveled. She hadn’t cleaned—the house or herself.”
“Jesus,” Aunt Dot whispered. “Oh, Heavenly Father, help her.”
I smiled. My aunt was known to break out in prayer or praise at any moment. Whenever I needed to get a prayer through, I called her. “She was behind on her bills,” I continued. “I agreed to pay them. She was already agitated, so when I asked her some questions, she went off and accused me of being like my father.”
Aunt Dot frowned. “That’s not a bad thing. Your father was a good man.”
Whenever I thought about the man I’d thought was my father, I felt two things at once. I missed him, because he’d died when I was too young to get
to know him as a man. And I resented him, because he’d left me to suffer with my mother. Today, that feeling of resentment was strong. “Interesting,” I mused.
“What?” she asked. “I know you and your father had a strained relationship, but he loved you.”
I rubbed the back of my neck. “I know, Auntie.”
“So, what’s the problem?”
The waitress returned with coffee and orange juice. She explained the buffet process and shared the chef’s featured entree.
Grinning, my aunt rubbed her hands together. “Ooh, sounds delicious. Although, I think I’ll have the eggs benedict today.”
When the waitress walked away, I stood and pulled out my aunt’s chair. We made our way over to the buffet. As we piled our plates, my mind stayed on the conversation ahead. Of course, I’d done my own research, searching my mother’s business documents, looking at her high school yearbooks, old pictures my late grandmother had given me. I found nothing, not even a small clue. My birth certificate listed Preston Hayes Sr. as my father.
My aunt happily hummed a church devotional as she scooped fresh fruit onto her plate, while I asked the carver to slice me a piece of roast beef. It almost felt like there was too much food available today. There were so many good options, it was hard to choose what to eat. In the end, I decided on a fresh Belgian waffle and hash browns instead of the made-to-order omelet.
I stepped over to the waffle station and made my request. There was someone in line ahead of me, so I knew I’d have to wait a bit. I picked a blueberry off my plate and popped it in my mouth.
“Don’t look now, but someone is watching you.”
I smiled to myself, immediately recognizing the voice. I glanced over. “Hey, Dallas.”
She leaned closer. “You’re literally turning heads in this restaurant. Like the woman over there by the cheese blintzes. She can barely concentrate on her plate because she’s so busy watching you.”
Chuckling, I whispered, “Is she cute?”
She tapped her chin. “Beautiful. And my mother’s age. If you’re into the cougar thing. She might buy you a car.”