by Meg Easton
“How are you doing?”
“I’ve been better. Matt told me that he cheated on Ciara, so of course Ciara moved out a couple of days ago.”
Macie gasped. “Oh no. But they seemed so happy!”
He didn’t know why he brought it up. He didn’t want to talk about it—he mostly just wanted her to understand why he wasn’t feeling the Christmas spirit. He shifted his gaze to the Christmas tree and a refreshments table instead of at Macie. She picked up that he didn’t want to talk about it pretty quickly.
“Come,” she said. “You need punch.” She led him to the table, seeming a little unsure of herself, but covering it decently well. As she was ladling the punch into a cup, she said, “I know you don’t want alcohol to harm this beautiful body of yours so I’d reassure you by letting you know this punch doesn’t contain any, but it probably does have a near lethal amount of sugar, so there’s that.”
She smiled so big when she was handing it to him that he couldn’t help but smile while he took it, his hand lingering on the cup, brushing up against hers longer than necessary.
“I think I could use the sugar today.”
Macie led him around the room, introducing him to everyone. In his current state, it made him seriously question whether he should’ve come.
The woman with auburn hair who had been taking pictures at Hayride of the Santas stood in front of an area where chairs were set up, wearing a shirt that said, I’m dreaming of a white (and black and read) Christmas, and had a picture of a rolled up newspaper under a Christmas tree. She called out, “Everyone come on over—it’s time for our first game!”
Macie leaned in and whispered, “Are you sure you want to stay?”
He nodded, grabbed her hand, and headed to the chairs. He had needed something to get his mind off Matt, and maybe this would do it.
“For this first game, everyone’s going to need a partner, so if you didn’t bring someone, find someone to be yours.”
Macie looked at him and batted her eyes. Bad mood or not, she still managed to get a laugh out of him. “Will you do me the honor of being my partner in this game?”
“That would make me as happy as kid who just found out he made the ‘nice’ list.”
Aaron’s eyes went back to the front, where the woman said, “This game is called ‘TV Art Show Host,’ and you guys are the artist hosting! The always incredible Eli, here, is going to help me demonstrate.”
A man came up and joined her, and by the way they looked at each other, they were obviously dating. Or married. He glanced down at their ring fingers. Ahh. Engaged.
“Okay, the taller person goes in the front— that’s you, honey— and the shorter behind.” They scooted closer to a giant notebook of paper, the kind teachers sometimes used, that was propped up on an easel. “The taller person is the voice, and the shorter person is the arms, and cannot talk. The taller person puts their hands behind their backs, and the shorter person puts their arms under the arms of the person in front and sticks them out like this.” Eli was facing the audience, but the woman’s arms were the only arms they saw, and she waved at the crowd, making it look like Eli was the one waving.
“When it’s your partnership’s turn up here, I’ll show the shorter person a paper that says what scene they are going to draw, and what things need to be in it. Since they’re shorter, they aren’t going to be able to see what they’re drawing. While they’re drawing, the taller person has to narrate what’s happening, as if they are the host of a show that is teaching the audience how to draw this scene. And since the taller person can’t see what’s on the paper, they’re just going to have to figure it out as they go. Now who wants to be first?”
Everyone looked around at each other, like they weren’t sure if they wanted to start out a game they’d never played before, including Macie and Aaron.
“Okay then, I nominate...” The woman looked around the crowd. “Macie!”
“Thanks, Whitney,” Macie said, then looked at Aaron. “What do you say, teammate? We’ve partnered up on everything else pretty well.”
“True. Let’s win this. Is this a game where there are winners?”
“Even if it isn’t, let’s win it anyway.”
They went to the front of the crowd, and Eli adjusted the giant notepad so that everyone could see it. Aaron put his hands behind his back, and Macie slid her arms between his arms and his sides, and the touch sent heat rushing to his chest. Whitney showed Macie a paper, and he felt Macie lean back just enough to read it, then she closed the gap between them.
“Welcome,” Aaron said, turning to face the group, “to today’s episode of Draw a Christmas Scene. I am your host and resident artist...” He tried to quickly think of a couples name for him and Macie while she spread her arms out like he was about to introduce something awesome. “Aaracie.” Okay, that one was awful. Maybe he should’ve thought about this first. He turned his back most of the way toward the group, so that he was facing the big sheet of paper.
“I’d like to tell you what scene we’re drawing today, but I thought it might be more fun to keep it a surprise. Oh, and we’re drawing. For those of you following along at home, we are starting by drawing two horizontal lines right in the middle of the paper. And then some vertical lines— one on the left side and one, um, kind of in the center? Never mind. Scribble that one out. We don’t make mistakes here; we make happy little scribbles, like a garland on a Christmas tree. Doesn’t that just add to the festiveness?”
After spending a full four days away from Macie, away from her family, and in the middle of the mess made by someone he trusted more than anyone in the world, he’d been ready to walk away. But seeing her here today brought everything back.
“Next, kind viewers and budding artists, we draw a box underneath the horizontal lines. Oh, and then inside the box, but also kind of outside the box, we are drawing... Actually, I’m not going to tell you just yet, I’m going to let you have a moment to see if you can guess. If you’re doing this at home, just make things that kind of look like rectangles, but with the short sides curved, and just throw a bunch in there at all different angles. Now draw a jagged line above, kind of like the teeth of a shark. Oh! And that, my friends, is how you draw logs and a fire in a...I’m pretty sure that’s a fireplace.”
And feeling her pressed up against her back like this made him want to turn around and hold her tight and never let go. He wanted to lean into her, to have that cheek she had laying on his back to be laying on his chest. He wanted to kiss the top of her head.
“Okay, now above the fireplace, I want you to draw a big circle. That’s right, don’t worry if where you started the circle doesn’t match up with where you ended. It’s those kinds of details that really give this artwork personality. Now inside the circle, in the... bottom half, it looks like, draw a circle that’s less than half the size of the bigger one. Then above it, draw two more smaller circles. Now see how great that looks, having a giant face above your fireplace, giving you the Wow look?”
Everything to do with Macie right now confused him. Things were no longer clean and clear in his mind—it was all one muddled mess. He couldn’t figure out if he desperately wanted to be with her, or if he desperately wanted to run away. All he knew was he loved being with her. And that being with her was scaring him senseless. And the one person he would usually go to when he needed to talk things through, Matt, was the very last person he could go to.
“Wait a moment, we’re adding more eyes to the face. And more eyes.” He could feel Macie laughing into his back. “Lots more eyes. Yep, a Wow face with lots of eyes. That’s the secret to drawing a wreath hanging above your fireplace!”
He knew what Macie wanted. All along he’d known what he wanted. But then getting to know Macie and being around her family had made him question that. It made him want what he hadn’t wanted since he’d first separated from Sabrina. It made him want a wife who would be with him through thick and thin, facing all of life side by side.
It made him feel like he might have been wrong about marriage all these years.
“But don’t stop yet, young artists,” he said, “because we have a few more details to add. Yes, right in the middle of your canvas, we want to add a squirrely line. Remember what I said about that adding festiveness? Oh, wait. We don’t want to stop at the squirrely line; we want to curve it around and I think we maybe wanted to keep going until we get sort of in the vicinity of the beginning of the line. Because then when we’re done, we’ll have... a lump of coal, maybe? Those things are flammable, so don’t keep your lumps of coal this close to the fire in your own homes, young artists.”
Seeing what happened with Matt’s and Ciara’s marriage made him realize he hadn’t been wrong, though. He should’ve known better than to turn his back against guards he’d had in place for a reason. Guards he’d had for years. They were there to protect him, and he had let himself tear them down. He could already feel the pain that was causing, and knew from experience how much more it had the possibility to inflict.
“Keep going with those and pretty soon, you’ll have three very lovely...stockings! Yes, three lovely stockings hanging on, or floating above—your choice—your mantle. He turned to face the group and said, “And now we’ve reached the end of our episode. I do hope you’ll join us next time when we discover how to draw a new and very unique Christmas scene. Until then,” he could no longer remember the couple name he’d used for them, so he paused, trying to figure something out, “this is Macron, signing out.”
Macie spread her arms wide and he took a bow. The group roared with laughter and cheered. Macie came out from behind him and they grasped hands and did a second bow. She grinned at him, and he grinned right back and wished that partnering with Macie—in every random way they had over the past few weeks—didn’t always come so naturally. Because having so much fun with her just muddied the waters even more than they already were. Why couldn’t she just be awful? That would make this so much easier.
Chapter Seventeen
After three and a half days of not hearing from Aaron and her heart aching to connect with him, she was happy that he had texted that they were still on for the Main Street Business Alliance party. She was also more than a little wary. She had been hoping that he liked her more than just as a fake date, but three and a half days of no texting was a pretty big sign that he probably didn’t.
Of course, she figured that those days of no contact could very well have been because of what was going on with his friend Matt, but thinking along those lines was the same as holding out hope. And she was working to keep herself far from hope.
Still, though, she had hoped for some kind of answers. But all night long, she had been getting the opposite of answers. When Aaron had first arrived, he’d seemed like he didn’t want to be there at all. He was gracious enough as she was introducing him to everyone, but his usual spark was gone. Was that spark something he normally had, even when he wasn’t around her, and other things had taken it away? Or was that a spark that was a special reserved-for-her spark, and whatever connection they’d had was now gone?
She didn’t know him outside of having close contact with him, so she had no idea what his usual was. All she knew was that, her own fears and doubts aside, she missed the old Aaron.
And then, during the Art Show Host game, he had returned. He was back, and she had gotten to snuggle up to him. The smells of cinnamon and pine and chlorine and something else that was so uniquely and so perfectly Aaron that had clung to his coat was right next to her, and she had basked in it. Having him near her was so much better than having his coat. And he’d been fun and they’d worked together so well, just like they always had, and she’d felt connected to him again. She’d even put a second check mark next to Will do crazy, spontaneous things with me.
But after they sat back down, that disappeared. A few more pairs went up to do the Art Show Host game, and they’d all laughed pretty heartily, but his spark was gone again. Confused and frustrated by the mixed signals of apathy and fun and disappointment and irritability that was coming off him in constantly changing but buffeting waves, she got up and went to the refreshment table. Maybe some liquid sugar would help. Actually, what she really needed was water. Cool, clean water. And a walk in the brisk outdoor air. She tried to think of something in her car that she could say she forgot and had to run outside to get. Maybe the cold air would help her think.
Before she came up with something, though, Aaron was at her side. She had so many questions for him, and suddenly couldn’t think of a single one. But then he stood there, spark-less and unreadable, and she knew exactly what she needed to ask. “Do you like me?”
So many conflicting emotions played on his face so quickly that she couldn’t tell which one was strongest. After a moment, he carefully said, “Yes.”
“Fake-like me or real-like me?”
“Real.” Again with the careful, one word answers.
One word answers she didn’t want to hear. What she wanted to hear him say was that he didn’t actually like her—it was all a show, just like they had planned. Because if that was the case, then she could easily abandon all hope in this relationship, because that’s what she’d been after all along. An escape from hoping something would work out.
But he just gave her a yes. Knowing that, was this relationship one she could move forward with? She didn’t know if it was even possible. There were too many obstacles standing in their way. Not the least of which was the fact that he looked like he was pretty unhappy about liking her. Almost like he was mad about it.
He opened his mouth like maybe he wanted to ask a question. The same one she had asked him, possibly? But then he closed it, grabbed a cup of punch, and kept his eyes on it.
Macie said, “Your words are telling me one thing, but your actions—”
At the same time Aaron said, “I don’t know if I can—”
But just as both of them stopped talking to let the other talk, Brooke stepped up to the refreshment table. “Hello, you two! How are you...Oh.”
Just then, the whole group started making their way over. Macie was not about to advertise the troubles she and Aaron were having to all of her peers, and she didn’t want to put Aaron on the spot when he was struggling enough just talking to her about what was bothering him. So she pasted on a smile, even though it felt forced and not actually resembling a smile. “Is the game finished?” She slid her hand into Aaron’s as a wordless plea for help, because she knew she wasn’t pulling this off well on her own at all.
In a swift movement, he pulled his hand out of hers. “I’m sorry. If you’ll all excuse me, I need to leave. Right now.”
He hurried to the chairs at the side of the room where all the coats were stacked and pulled his out of the pile.
“Oh,” Cole said. “We’re sad to see you leave early. It’s been fun having you.”
It took a moment before Macie recovered from the shock of Aaron’s sudden reaction. Then she rushed to the chairs and pulled out her own coat, and ran after Aaron as he opened the door and went out into the cold night.
“Aaron!” she called out.
He stopped in his tracks and then turned to face her. “I’m sorry. I really am.”
“What just happened in there?”
Aaron ran his hands over his face. “I wasn’t lying when I said I liked you. More than like, actually. And I really thought that maybe we could make it work, but then I realized that the chances of it actually working were pretty minuscule.” He took a few deep breaths before continuing. “Seeing my parents broadcast a fake a relationship to the world when in reality it was decayed, and then going through it again with Sabrina took me somewhere more agonizing than I had known existed. And then the thing happened with Matt. I had forgotten how painful it is.” He swallowed. “He reminded me why I never wanted to get married.”
Macie tried to figure out how she should respond to that, but words didn’t come. She just stood there, mouth slightly open,
but silent.
“And then seeing you in there, pretending everything between us was fine when it very clearly wasn’t—it was just too much. I couldn’t.”
“I wasn’t trying to—”
He stepped closer, putting up a hand. “No, I know. But I can’t—” He paused, searching her face. “I just...I’m sorry. I can’t.” Then he turned and walked away.
Chapter Eighteen
The saying “misery loves company” must be true, because there wasn’t another good explanation of why Aaron ended up on Matt’s doorstep at eleven A.M. on Saturday with a pizza in one hand and chicken wings in the other.
“She’s just so perfect,” Matt said. “How could I have forgotten for a second how perfect she was? Do you think there’s ever going to be another woman as perfect as Ciara? I’ll tell you right now there’s not.”
“Just like there’s never going to be another woman I get along with as well as Macie.”
“You two were pretty fun together. You pair up well.”
“We really did. I’ve never had that before. In all the girls I’ve dated, and you know that’s been a lot—”
“By-product of never getting serious.”
“—none of them has been a teammate before. Someone who felt like a partner, who stood side-by-side with me in whatever we happened to be facing.”
“That’s valuable stuff, man.”
“It really is.”
“And we threw it all away.”
“Because we’re stupid.”
A knock sounded at the door, and Matt called out, “Whatever you’re selling, we’re not interested!”
There was another knock, more persistent this time. Aaron would’ve gotten up to get it, but he’d been half sitting, half laying in this same uncomfortable position for a while, and it’d take more effort than he could muster to move. A moment later, the door opened, and Ian & Timini, Dennis & Julie, and Shad & Annah all walked in.