by Devyn Cole
“I mean, do you really want to know?” Olivia asks me.
“Yes, I do,” I tell her.
“We could…”
“What, Olivia?” I ask impatiently. “We could what?”
“We could lose our minds,” she says.
I look back at her, completely stunned. The minute that follows her confession feels like an hour.
“All right,” I say. “I’ll be careful.”
Olivia might not realize I love her. But I do. I’m not afraid to go back into the AutumnView.
I don’t fear losing my mind more than I fear losing her. At least I’ll have lost everything for the woman who means more to me than I mean to myself.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Brett
I push open the door of our local ‘50s diner. Jesse and the guys are here, as usual.
I know I’m the last person he wants to see right now. Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if his girl told him never to speak to me again. And, I wouldn’t get in the way of that except that this is important. This is about Olivia.
I take a seat in an empty booth a few rows down from Jesse. I notice an overabundance of Halloween decorations in this place. Tiny toy tombstones and corpses dangling from fake cobwebs lining the tops of the windows. Hard candy in bright colored wrappers over all the counters. God damn. Why is everything in Summerland so damn “cute.” It’s like this town is taunting you every time you feel like crap. It reminds you that your b.s. is entirely your own fault.
A waitress comes to take my order, and I ask for black coffee with no room for cream or sugar.
Then, as she walks off, Jesse and I lock eyes. We’re old friends, so we’re able to communicate silently more or less. At first, he ignores me. But, when I don’t let up, he eventually nods back at me. He knows I won’t let up until I get what I want.
Back when he was a cynic about love, I always knew that Olivia was going to be the one. She’s the only woman I’ve ever wanted. And, I’m not interested in replacing her with someone new. Not ever.
“You’re really pushing me to do something I don’t want to do,” I hear someone say as they approach me from behind.
Then, two men slide into the booth with me. It’s the two guys that beat me up in the alleyway.
Everyone in town knows what these guys do, which means everyone knows what kind of shit I’ve landed myself in this time. Now, not only do I have Olivia’s father to deal with. But, I have the rest of the town also thinking I’m no good for her.
“I don’t have your money yet. So, I don’t know what you want me to do,” I shrug.
“You don’t have my money yet,” he repeats. The frustration in his voice is beyond obvious. “You don’t know what I want you to do?”
“I’m working a full-time construction job. I'm taking on as many shifts as I can at the bars around town. Damn it, I’m working eighty to a hundred hours a week. I can’t make money any faster than I am!” I say sternly.
“Listen, I don’t care about your problems, Brett. I want my fucking money. And, I know what you just bought a few weeks ago. So, don’t fucking play games with me. Or, I’ll make you pay for it, you arrogant prick!” The man says, grinding his teeth as saliva flies through his teeth.
“Yo, Brett. Can we talk for a minute?” Jesse asks, showing up at the booth.
“I’m kind of in the middle of something—”
“Nah, we’re done. You guys enjoy your night!” He says, patting Jesse on the shoulder as he gets to his feet. “How ya’ doing, Jesse? Stop by the racetrack sometime. I can help you earn a nice little vacation fund for you and your pretty wife.”
The other man slides out of the booth as well. They both leave the diner, slamming the glass door so hard as they exit that it almost cracks into pieces.
“This is exactly what I wanted to talk to you about,” Jesse says, joining me in the booth. “Look, you’re your own person. What you choose to do and who you choose to associate is your business. And Olivia is a grown woman, so if she chooses to involve herself with you to the point where it puts her in danger, I have to respect that. But, not when it comes to Fiona. I also have a responsibility to look out for my wife.”
“What’s your point, Jesse?” I ask.
“Fiona is an incredible woman. But, when it comes to her choice in friends, I think she can sometimes struggle. The problem is that there are so few people she likes to spend time with that when she finds one, she tends to be overly loyal,” Jesse tells me. “Brett, I’ll be straight with you. I don’t think Olivia is a good friend for Fiona to have in her life. I mean, I know if it weren’t for Olivia, I would never have even met Fiona. However, I still can’t help but feel like she’s going to put Fiona in a lot of danger. She’s my wife, Brett. You’re one of my best friends, but that doesn’t come before her.”
My instinct right now is to leap across the table and hit Jesse square in the jaw. How dare he talk about Olivia like she’s some sort of criminal? I don’t care how long he and I go back. No one gets to talk shit about her in front of me and still breathe.
But, as I’m looking at Jesse in the eyes, I realize he’s only guilty of loving his wife like I love my girl. He’s doing what he should do as a man and as a husband.
However, I also know I would never let Olivia get involved in anything dangerous whatsoever. It’s the reason I’ve dragged our relationship into such a bad place. And why I’ve hurt her feelings again and again. I’d rather have her hate me and end up with another man than ever see her hurt. But, with a whole lot of luck, maybe I won’t have to choose between those two.
“Listen, Jesse. The reason I came here was to talk to you about something,” I tell him. “I need a favor. I need you to let me come over to your house tonight. And, I need for you not to tell Fiona so that Olivia doesn’t leave before I get there.”
“Did you not hear a fucking thing I just said, dude?” Jesse asks.
He taps his knuckles anxiously against the metal table.
“I’m sorry to be so harsh here, but I don’t want my wife involved in any of you all’s bullshit, Brett. Do you get me?” Jesse questions.
“I do.”
“It doesn’t seem like you do.”
“Well, I do,” I say again. “Jesse, she’s the only thing I care about in the entire universe. Please, just let me have one more chance to get her back while there’s still a chance.”
Jesse knows me. He knows how prideful I am, even when being that way fucks my life up repeatedly. The fact that I’m begging him for a favor right now means that I must be truly desperate at this moment.
“Yeah,” he says, looking away. “Let’s go.”
Twenty minutes later, we arrive at Jesse’s house, sitting right by the ocean.
Fiona has Halloween decorations up of ghouls, vampires, and monsters. But she’s made them appear far more feminine than they should be by covering them in mountains of fake glitter.
I’ve never been nervous once in my life, but I feel it for the first time. This has to work out. I refuse to live without Olivia.
As we walk up the stairs to their porch, I spot Olivia through the window, walking down the stairs. She’s so gorgeous. Her bright blonde hair, emerald eyes, and slender, unbelievably fuckable body makes me think about the other night. How amazing she felt around my throbbing cock. The way she’d whimper louder inside my ear every time I reentered her. Even the way her acrylic nails scraped against my back as I was pistoning her full of my furiously swollen manhood. I'm reexperiencing the ecstasy we both felt that night.
But, then, the moment flips on me. It causes me to realize Olivia gave me everything that night. She gave me the virginity she had been holding onto for far longer than most women. She almost gave me confirmation that I had her heart by uttering the “L” word before I stopped her.
And, I did nothing with it. Worse than that, I threw it back in Olivia's face.
A sickness creeps into my stomach—the acidity of guilt. Even the fact that I had good
intentions doesn’t dampen the self-loathing. But, I know that if I have any shot in hell of keeping her in my life, I have to go at this with full conviction. Once I walk through that door, I can’t hold back, and I can’t doubt myself even a little, or I’ll have really lost her forever.
“I’m home, Baby Girl,” Jesse yells as he opens the door.
“I’ll be down in a few, babe!” I hear Fiona yell from upstairs as I step into their house.
Olivia smiles at Jesse. But, when she discovers he’s not alone, I witness the full range of emotions cycle across her beautiful, angelic face.
“Olivia…” I say.
“I have absolutely nothing to say to you,” she says, backing away from me like I’m radioactive.
“Well, I have things to say to you,” I tell her.
“I don’t fucking want to hear them!” She screams at me.
“You’re going to anyway,” I say sternly.
“Omigod, what do you want? Why do you keep doing this?” She cries. “Why can’t you just leave me alone for once?”
“Because you’re too important to me,” I say, touching her wrist.
She pulls it away and shoves me back towards the door as hard as she can.
“Olivia!” Jesse says, scoldingly.
“It’s all right, Jesse,” I say. “I deserve it.”
“I’m done with you. There’s someone else, idiot! You’re just too stupid to have known that!” She shrieks.
“I know that’s not true!” I yell back, grabbing her arms. “You’re mine, Olivia!”
“No, I’m not!” She shrieks. “I’m never going to be again!”
She squirms out of my grip and bolts away towards the partially opened back door. Without even hesitating, I chase after her.
I run through the house as she pushes the door open. And follow her as she glides down the hill behind the house.
“Jesus fucking Christ!” Jesse yells after us.
He’s concerned for Fiona. As well as he should be. Olivia and I have the sort of love that doesn’t make sense from the outside. Hell, it doesn’t even make sense to me. But, I know that I need her. It’s the only thing I’ve ever been sure about in my entire life.
I race after her down to the water. By the time she reaches the beach, I’ve caught up with her.
She falls to her knees. I fall with her. Then, I cup her face in my hands. It’s already soaking with tears.
“We’re inevitable, Olivia. We can’t ever lose,” I tell her.
“Why do you keep saying that? We lost, Brett!” She shouts. “We lost…”
“Because it’s the truth. It’s the only truth that matters. And, I won’t stop saying it until you believe it,” I tell Olivia, my heart feeling like it’s breaking open as well now.
“You’re playing games with me,” Olivia says as she attempts to hold back more tears.
“I’m not playing games with you,” I tell her.
The pain in her big leaf-green eyes and the trembling in her body as I wrap my arms around her back does more damage to me than anything those two assholes could do to my body. Watching her so hurt, I feel like I’m dying myself. And, the suffering is made so much sharper by the fact that I’m the one who caused it.
“You know you’re the only woman I’ll ever want or need. You’re the one I’m supposed to protect. And, no matter how many times you curse at me, try to make me jealous, or slap and scratch me, I’m not going anywhere. I’m on this highway with you, little girl. And, there’s no exit,” I whisper in her ear.
Olivia remains silent.
I tilt up her chin and lean my head down, and our lips collide in a slow, wet embrace full of tongue. My cock has been hard since the moment I saw in through the window several minutes ago.
I know that nothing’s changed. It’ll take time to prove that I’m good for Olivia, and I will have my actions do that more than my words. But, for this moment, we’re together, honoring an undeniable love.
I reach down and grab a handful of that luscious, pert ass. Olivia has a thong on, but I’m not going to ask why. Maybe, she knew I’d come. Maybe Olivia just wanted to wear it. Or, perhaps she really does have another guy. I don’t care. All I care about is that for this moment, I have her back.
I grip the hem of her dress and begin to slide it off her body. She grabs my wrists and shakes her head at me.
“No,” Olivia says. “Not yet.”
“I understand, Sweetheart,” I say, letting go of the dress.
I pull her into my arms. She rests her head on my shoulder as we continue standing on our knees. The full moon shines over the two of us. The black ocean beside us seems to calm down.
“How can I have an IQ of one hundred and sixty-nine and still be such an immature little cry baby?” Olivia asks, giggling as she pulls a tissue out of her pocket and blows into it.
“C’mon, you know smart people hate emotions. You can’t be good at something you think are a waste of time,” I say, laughing myself.
“Oh, shut up!” Olivia says.
Then, she lightly kisses the side of my neck. I know she probably wishes she hadn’t. But I’m so glad she did it. Because it lets me know that no matter what happens between us. We are never truly over.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Olivia
Brett and I stare at one another.
“Brett, you--”
“Made a different decision. I never followed you down to the beach that night. I waited around inside the house for a few minutes and then headed home,” he says, his eyes holding a sort of confused astonishment. “What does this…Does this change anything?”
“It does,” I tell him, smiling. “Baby, this means that everything we see and experience in Autumnview will be brand new from here on out. I mean, it still won’t be real, but we can see how things could have been different for us. We have a chance to prove to ourselves that we’re supposed to be together. We’re no longer just watching the events of the pasts repeat themselves. Anything can happen!”
“I can’t believe it. This unbelievable thing actually works. You’re going to save so many relationships with this,” Brett says. “But first, let’s save ours.”
“I agree,” I say. “Omigod, I’m so happy! Until now, I honestly didn’t think this would ever work. But, now…Well, let’s just get started. I’ll go and then you’ll go. Hm, I guess I should just scroll until I find something interesting…”
“Wait,” Brett says, suddenly. “I’ll go first. I’m the one who messed our relationship up. I should be the one to fix it. Plus, you know I’m much better at remembering that I’m using the device than you are.”
“Ah, true!” I say, sighing. “Fine, I’ll watch from the sidelines. But, hurry up, Mister! Because I want to experiment with this new reality, too. Not just for our relationship, but for science!”
“You’re such a nerd!” Brett says, kissing my forehead. “All right, I’m going in…”
CHAPTER NINE
Brett
Olivia and I are leaving the parking lot towards the town’s annual Harvest Moon Carnival.
I have my hand around Olivia’s hip, and I don’t plan on letting go. I just feel so fortunate to have her back that I can’t possibly imagine having her out of my sight.
Behind us are Jesse and Fiona, also holding hands. If I were looking at the four of us from the outside, I’d puke. But, given everything Olivia and I have been through since the beginning, one sweet and straightforward date night seems like just what we need.
“Viking ship first? I ask the group.
“Nope. Fiona is a wuss with rides, so you need to pick an easier one,” Jesse says with a grin.
“It’s true. I am,” Fiona nods.
“Oh c’mon, Fiona. Be brave. Life is for the bold!” Olivia tells her.
“No, thanks,” Fiona replies casually.
“Fiona!” Olivia yells.
“Fine! Only because I know your obnoxious ass won’t shut up until I say yes,” Fiona answers, r
olling her eyes.
“At ‘a girl!” Olivia says, squeezing Fiona’s cheeks together like she’s four years old.
The four of us push our way through the busy cluster of our neighbors. We spend ten minutes wandering around the festival but can’t find the damn ride. You’d think that an enormous, fake boat that swings over sixty feet above the ground would be easy to spot. But Summerland has spared no expense when it comes to this carnival. There are more rides here than at most amusement parks. And, I’m just asking myself: how the hell do they afford to rent all these things?
As we’re searching around, I notice that nearly every guy we pass tries to make eyes at Olivia. And, I’m right there daring them to keep ogling my girl. Everyone here knows that she’s mine. They don’t want to see what I’ll do to protect her…
“I know you hate corny stuff like this,” Olivia tells me. “I’m really glad you came.”
“I’d never pass up an opportunity to have you cradled in my arms, baby girl. Plus, you know, I’ve got to watch out for you wherever you go! You’re my most valuable investment,” I whisper in her ear.
“I better be your only investment!” She whispers in my ear.
“You don’t even have to wonder about that, Olivia,” I tell her. “I don’t ever want to live without you.”
“Me neither,” she whispers back.
Then we stop where we are, and she presses her lips against mine. We wrap our arms around one another, and our bodies collide.
“Christ, guys. It’s been five minutes, and you’re already so sappy!” Jesse shrugs.
“I think it’s cute!” Fiona says. “Olivia needs romance. Otherwise, she’d be in her room conducting science experiments with beakers and color liquids or something else equally nerdy.”