Glumly, Brett went to the kitchen table where the sausage balls and a few other appetizers were laid out. Kelsey was in there alone. She grinned at him. “My hero,” she said. “If I could have asked for anyone to walk through that door at this very minute it would’ve had to be you.”
Brett smiled. Her words made him feel special, and he could tell she meant it. But she didn’t think of him the way he thought of her, and that hurt, too. “How can I help?” he asked, shoving down the bitter little voice that threatened to ruin his evening and his friendship with Kelsey.
“Can you take the lasagna out for me? It’s so heavy,” Kelsey said as she opened the oven door and slid the huge pan of bubbling cheesy deliciousness out. She looked up and smiled. “I think I really went over the top with this one.”
He stooped down and took the oven mittens from her to lift it out. “Wow,” he said, feeling the weight. “You really did.”
She picked up the large wooden salad bowl, full of fresh baby lettuces, chopped cucumber and celery and followed him through to the kitchen table. “I made room for it, here.” She indicated a spot with hot pads down to protect the surface of the table.
“Here we go.” Brett set the lasagna down and stepped back in awe. “It looks and smells delicious. I can’t wait to dig in.”
“Well, go ahead and fix your plate. I’ll let the others know it’s ready.” She turned and stepped to the group gathered in the living room. “Dinner is served! Come fix your plates in the kitchen.”
Kelsey waited as her guests lined up to fix their plates. Brett saw her standing alone and took his plate into the living room to grab another few moments alone with her. As he walked up and put his food down, she was just popping a tortilla chip heaped with guacamole into her mouth as some of the dip slid off onto her finger. Just the sight of her perfect berry-red lips pursed around her slender index finger was enough to make Brett forget himself. He lunged forward, determined to claim her mouth for himself as she removed her finger.
But as she realized what he meant to do, she jerked away. “What are you doing?” she asked, her eyes flashing with what he interpreted as anger. “Brett, I am very fond of you, but you are my friend. I need friends more than I need a boyfriend right now. I’m still not completely sure I’m going to stay here. Until I’m sure I don’t want any complications.”
“I know,” Brett said, mortified at her reaction. He was horrified at his own actions. He had no idea what had come over him. “I’ve barely eaten all day and I guess I just got a little lightheaded. I’m really sorry, Kelsey. I don’t know what came over me. You know, maybe I should just go.”
“Don’t be silly. I don’t want you to leave.” She looked down at his plate. “Just sit down and eat. Get some of that hearty lasagna in your belly and you’ll feel all better. Let’s forget all about it. Okay?”
He nodded and did as he was told, but the rest of the evening felt strained and uncomfortable. Brett kept out of Kelsey’s way, not sure how to speak to her, or explain himself. It was clear enough though that she wasn’t interested in him as more than a friend or that moment would have gone very differently indeed.
Brett hated to admit it but, in his dreams, Kelsey always melted into his arms and returned his kisses passionately and fervently. He’d not once imagined this awkward nothingness between them. Especially as Kelsey seemed her usual cheery self with everyone else.
After one too many disappointed looks from Kelsey and seeing her give Joe Abrams a few too many flirtatious ones, Brett decided he’d had enough and said his goodbyes. He glanced at the snow globe on the table and wished he’d never tried to do the right thing.
Maybe if she knew it had been him and not Joe that had given her that gift she’d be acting differently. Maybe she’d have returned his kiss. Maybe his thoughtful kindness would have made a difference. But, none of it mattered now.
She felt what she felt, and Brett was her friend and nothing more. Sadly, he drove home to his lonely, empty apartment when he could have been celebrating with his friends. And Kelsey.
5
“You look lovely tonight,” Joe said, gazing deeply into Kelsey’s eyes, just before midnight. He’d cornered her in the kitchen, as she was loading the dishwasher.
She wasn’t entirely sure she was enjoying all the attention he’d been lavishing on her tonight. It didn’t feel genuine. Even the way he had phrased it seemed almost disrespectful, as if she usually didn’t look so good. Kelsey wasn’t vain, but she was comfortable in her own body and knew that she was a moderately attractive woman.
“Thank you,” she replied awkwardly, tucking a stray strand of hair that had escaped her casual updo behind her ear. The kitchen suddenly seemed far too small. “Thanks for coming and again, thanks for the snow globe.”
“I’ve been meaning to ask you about that,” Joe said, grinning and leaning back against the kitchen counter. The very epitome of relaxed virility and absolute self-confidence, he was gorgeous and he knew it. Every inch of him exuded smooth sex appeal.
But Kelsey was surprised to find that when all that testosterone and confidence was turned her way, not only was it overpowering but it was a little off-putting as well. He seemed arrogant. She realized that deep inside she was wishing for Brett’s straightforwardness, his quiet ways that offered respect and genuine affection. Joe was all show and no sincerity.
“You have?” she asked, wishing Annie might come into the kitchen and rescue her. “I’d have thought it only natural to thank someone for such a thoughtful gift.”
“Oh, I’m sure you’re right,” he said, his tone a little patronizing. “Well, you see, I have a little confession to make… And I hope you won’t hate me for it.” He turned his big puppy dog eyes on full beam.
Kelsey almost laughed out loud. It seemed that Annie’s radar had been right, as usual. Kelsey had no doubt what Joe was about to say. “Okay, shoot,” she said, determined not to give him the satisfaction of her offering him absolution before his confession.
“I didn’t get you anything, Kelsey, and I am so very sorry for that.” He enunciated his words and they oozed fake sincerity so much that it was clear how disingenuous he truly was. “I completely forgot about Secret Santa. Things have been so crazy, what with the move and the new job, you know.” The apologetic eyes were still on her, but there was no actual apology, nor was he really contrite. No, he did what men like him have always done and always will. He prayed she wouldn’t see through him, not that he really cared either way. It was likely his only desire was to not get fussed at.
“Well, now that creates a bit of a mystery,” Annie said, finally appearing in the doorway. Kelsey stifled a sigh of relief. It really had been getting to be a little much and she longed to burst into a fit of the giggles at the absolute earnestness of Joe’s ridiculous confession. The look on Annie’s face told Kelsey that she didn’t believe Joe’s capacity to try and bamboozle anyone in their right senses either.
“And, really, Joe?” Annie continued. “You’re supposed to be this hotshot genius, and you still don’t know that it isn’t a good idea to try and play off of something you didn’t do, then hope to get further credit by admitting you didn’t?”
“My Momma taught me to tell the truth,” he said with a careless shrug. “I’m just trying to set the record straight.”
“After you’ve slimed yourself all over Kelsey all night, pretending you hadn’t forgotten her. If honesty was so important to you, you’d have confessed the minute you walked in that door. No, you’d have called her back to tell her, and not even turned up here,” Annie said, clearly angry, though there was a twinkle in her eye that told Kelsey she was enjoying every minute of giving the arrogant surgeon a dressing down.
Suddenly wishing it was all over, Kelsey smiled at Joe. “Please, this isn’t necessary,” Kelsey pleaded. “Let’s just forget all about the snow globe, who did or didn’t buy it and who did or didn’t confess to what.” Her tone was firm, and she stood up straight and tall,
letting Joe see she wouldn’t take any more of his nonsense. “Maybe you should go, Joe. The party’s over and there’s nobody here who’s going to react to those practiced charms of yours. Especially not me.”
He nodded, leaned forward to kiss her on the cheek, as if she’d just told him that she ‘d see him for coffee the next day. But he glared at Annie before he sauntered out of the kitchen. He truly was one of life’s takers. Kelsey didn’t doubt that he would use any route he could to get his own way, even taking the credit for other men’s actions. It made her wonder if all those exploits in surgery he claimed credit for had been his achievements or those of the more junior members of his teams. But she’d never know the truth and she didn’t really care to find out. Dr. Joe Abrams didn’t deserve even another moment of her time.
As Annie moved closer and put an arm around her waist, Kelsey wondered how many more awkward moments could happen in one night. She let her head drop onto Annie’s shoulder and the pair stood in silence for a few moments.
Brett had already gone home, and she’d been truly surprised by how sorry she was that she hadn’t had a chance to talk with him again. It would have been nice to reassure him that just because she hadn’t been ready to kiss him in that moment, and wasn’t sure if she ever would be, that she valued him more than almost anyone she’d ever known. And now, Joe was gone, too. It certainly wouldn’t go down as one of her more successful Christmas parties.
“You alright?” Annie asked her as Kelsey stood up and began rinsing the remaining dishes before stacking them in the racks of the dishwasher.
“I’m fine. Tired, I suppose, but okay.” She didn’t want to talk about any of the incidents of the evening, so she changed the subject hoping Annie would understand. “So, how is it going with Duncan?” It had been clear to everyone present that the poor man didn’t stand a chance. Annie had gone at him with all guns blazing. The best thing was, that he seemed to be rather enjoying it.
“He’s taking me to the candle-lit service on Christmas Eve,” Annie confessed. “After we’ve been for a little eggnog and supper.”
“Oh, I’m so happy for you,” Kelsey said truthfully.
“Did you want Joe?” Annie asked cautiously.
“Not really. I think there was a part of me–the young, stupid and naïve part–that thought it might be really romantic and sweet, but he’s so vain and superficial. He’ll never be out for anything more than his own satisfaction and happiness.”
“Vain about everything,” Annie agreed. The two women chuckled. “But, what about Brett? What happened there? One minute things were hunky dory and the next he’s smarting at every man who even looks your way and then storms off in a huff.”
“He tried to kiss me,” Kelsey said.
“Oh, my, word! He didn’t?”
“Oh, my, word, he most definitely did!” Kelsey admitted.
“Wow.” Annie shook her head in disbelief.
“I know. I never thought he had it in him either.”
“What was it like? Was it good?” Annie asked, her eyes wide.
“I ducked away from him. I panicked,” Kelsey admitted. “There was no kiss. Like I said… He tried.”
Annie scrutinized her closely. “But, I think you wanted him to kiss you, so why did you panic? Why didn’t you let it happen?”
Kelsey chuckled for a minute. “Well, first of all, I had a mouthful of guacamole.”
“Oh, that wasn’t well planned, was it?” Annie laughed and bit her bottom lip. “I kind of feel sorry for him.”
Kelsey laughed quietly, then sobered. “Seriously, though, Annie, he’s my friend. What if it ruins everything? You can’t ever go back, Annie. And he loves it here in Florida and, I can’t help it, I may want to go home one day. I can’t expect him to just drop everything and follow me to the wet and cold and snowy winters of Connecticut.”
“Stanbury isn’t so bad,” Annie teased. “But why run before you can jump? You don’t have to make decisions like that before you even look and see if there’s something worth exploring. Brett isn’t one of the Joe’s of this world. I’d bet good money that he’s still friends with every one of his past girlfriends. He’s that kind of man. It doesn’t have to be the end of a friendship, you know, if it’s the right man you choose.”
“But, working together, it could be so awkward,” Kelsey said, knowing she was now scraping the barrel of bad excuses.
“He’s up in the offices. You’re on the floor. You’re hardly in each other’s pockets,” Annie reminded her.
“And he thinks I don’t want him,” Kelsey said sadly. “And, I didn’t think I did. I thought I was being honest with him, but…”
“Now you know he’s the man you’ve always wanted?” Annie asked. “You know, if more women recognized that the man they really want is their best friend, life would be so much easier all the way around. This is recoverable, Kelsey. I doubt he’ll hold it against you if he gets what he’s wanted all along.”
Kelsey nodded. “I have a lot to think about and it’s late. You need to get out of here and get your beauty sleep.”
They hugged and Annie left Kelsey alone to her thoughts.
Lying there, gazing up at the ceiling, Kelsey wondered why so many people had to make all the wrong choices before they could make the right one. She’d not even thought about Brett as more than a friend until tonight. The thought had never crossed her mind. But he was perfect. He was solid and dependable, good looking in a boy next door kind of way, and he genuinely cared about everyone. He was polite and sweet, and everything your Mom would ever approve of. Yet, most women would pass a guy like Brett by, fooled into thinking that the brash showiness of a man like Joe was the asset to be prized.
She couldn’t believe she’d ever thought for a minute that Joe would bother to come up with a thoughtful Secret Santa gift. And Mrs. Clause as the giver? Come on.
A man like Joe would probably never be pinned down. The chase and eventual capture of a man like him would certainly be a hard-won prize. But it wasn’t one that would bring long-term satisfaction. How could it? Men like Joe Abrams never loved anyone more than they loved themselves. Kelsey saw it over and over at the hospital. Women who bent over backwards to please their husbands having plastic surgery just so they wouldn’t leave. Their small hospital saw more of this than anyone would ever believe in the superficial South Florida society.
Kelsey was glad she was well clear of that kind of life. She had more self-love and self-respect than to try and be something she wasn’t to please someone else.
She fell asleep wondering how on Earth she would ever be able to make it up to Brett, trying to phrase her apology just right. But she feared he’d not give her the chance to explain. He deserved better than the reaction he’d gotten that night. He deserved better than a girl like her who’d been too silly to see what she was passing up until it was too late.
When the morning came after a restless night, Kelsey got ready to go to work. She threw some leftovers into cartons for her lunch, Annie’s and, she hoped, for Brett, too. She prayed he’d accept it as a peace offering and would give her a chance to make it up to him. There had only really been two people she had needed to be there with her last night, and she hated thinking about the way she’d sent one of them away.
But when she got to the hospital, all the nurses were talking about Annie and Duncan. The news was out and they were all hoping the two turned into a real couple. They were also tittering about Joe showing up with two or three hoping he’d call them.
The next bit of conversation took her by surprise. Word was that Brett had been called to Baptist Health’s Miami offices. He’d be staying there for the next month or two to help with a full accounts audit.
Kelsey’s heart sank. She pulled out her cell and found his number. She should call him. She should tell him she had been an idiot. But she paused before she hit dial. What if he didn’t answer? What if he did? She wasn’t sure which would be worse.
What if he wouldn�
�t forgive her? What if she’d had her only shot and had blown it before she even knew she wanted it? Reluctantly she put the cellphone away in her pocket and pinned a smile on her face and made her way out to check on her first patient.
6
Brett pored over the pages and pages of figures. His head felt like it might explode. The hospital’s accounting manager had left them in the lurch just weeks before year end. The books were in a mess, and even Brett wasn’t sure if there was enough time to put everything right before the end of the year. He’d been flattered to be the one called to sort things out. Mariner’s was the only hospital in the group that was end of year ready or so it seemed, yet the task was so big that he was destined to fail.
“Can I get you anything?” Heidi, the tousle-headed accounts clerk asked him. She was cute and always flirted with him whenever he came to Miami for training and meetings. He’d always turned her down when she asked him to go for coffee or lunch since he felt that going out with her would be somehow unfair because of his feelings for Kelsey.
But Kelsey had made her feelings for him very clear. Brett didn’t doubt that she was still busy canoodling with Joe Abrams. Well, she deserved better, but he had to respect her choice. It was her choice to make and not his, after all.
“Coffee would be great,” he told her. “Hey, and you know I keep taking a rain-check. How about getting dinner after work since I’m here for more than a day or so?”
Heidi beamed. She really was really cute. Most men would be delighted that a girl like her found them attractive. So, why was Brett really not intrigued by her or her attentions?
A Snow Globe Christmas (Ornamental Match Maker Book 5) Page 4