Emma, on the other hand, loves the attention and re-emerges from the closet two minutes later walking across the room like she's on a cat walk.
“Seriously, Em! You realize my brothers will be here, right?”
“Isn't that the point?” she purrs, pulling on a sheer black wrap before grabbing her sunglasses from the bed. “Well, come on.” She taps her foot impatiently.
I grumble, peeling myself off the bed before making my way inside the small walk in closet to change. Thankfully, there is a full body mirror and I’m able to make sure that I am completely covered in all the important areas.
Emma's right—of course—and the bathing suit fits perfectly. I sometimes forget we wear the same size because I am so much curvier than her. I feel like a cow when I stand next to her. She's lean and toned while I am, well nothing but boobs and hips. I used to say that the only reason I didn't topple over in a certain direction is because my ass and boobs evened out each side. While some girls think curves are what's hot, I disagree greatly. Maybe because I have always viewed myself as too curvy.
I can't deny the red color of the bathing suit really does look good against my pale skin. Deciding it makes me feel a little less naked, I leave my long, wavy, dark hair down. At least it provides me with somewhat of a shield. Reluctantly, I exit the closet and do my best to cover my body.
Emma whistles from the doorway, pulling her sunglasses down to rest on the bridge of her nose. “Holy shit, Gracie. You look hot!” she exclaims, a wide smile across her face.
“I feel ridiculous,” I whine, searching for something to wear over the bathing suit. Again, I'm not ashamed of my body but I hate walking around in next to nothing. While Emma may be completely comfortable doing just that, I’m the more conservative of the two of us.
“Here.” She steps up next to me, a white bathing suit cover in her hands. “I’m nothing if not prepared.” She winks, giving me a knowing smile. I take the wrap from her and pull it over my head. It's a halter style dress cover, cutting off just past my mid-thigh. I smile at her graciously and then grab my sunglasses before following her back down the stairs.
Emma, with tanning lotion and beach towels in hand, leads the way onto the back stone patio. The area is a large oval, decorated with a six person table with a large blue umbrella and chairs. A propane grill and a picnic table are set up on the far left side. I love sitting out here at night after everyone has gone to bed. It's so peaceful and I love looking out over the dark water.
“Where are you going?” I ask Emma as she starts heading down the concrete stairs to the dock below.
“There's too much shade up here.” She gestures to the trees that shade a good portion of the grassy area. “Let's go down to the dock.”
Deciding there's no point in arguing, I simply nod and follow her down the stairs. She lays out the beach towels side by side and takes her spot on one, stretching out onto her stomach. I mirror her actions and do my best to relax.
The sun feels amazing on my back and I close my eyes, loving the sound of the water lapping just below us. I don't know how long we lay there like that. Neither one of us speaks and I know that Emma is enjoying the peace just as much as I am.
Unfortunately, it's short-lived as our silence is interrupted by the sound of car doors closing and a man's laughter. I know it's Ian without a second thought. His contagious laugh echoes through the air and I open my eyes to find Emma staring at me, a mischievous grin plastered across her face.
“Let the fun begin!” she sings, pushing herself to her feet before taking off in a full sprint toward the house.
While I’m excited to see my brothers, I don't share Emma's enthusiasm. Instead of joining her, I lay my head back down on the towel and decide to enjoy my last few moments of peace while I can, knowing full well that I will get very little of it from this moment on. Besides my late night escapes, the house will be buzzing and I’m in no rush to partake in the family bonding.
Truth is, as much as I love Emma and my family, I would much rather be alone. It's the only time that I don't have to pretend that everything is okay. I don't have to pretend that Kyle never existed or that my life is perfect. It's during my time alone that I can let myself feel the pain and the loss that plagues me every second of every day.
I have not been the same since that day five years ago. The day that I try so hard to push out of my mind. The day I try to forget. The day that haunts me everywhere I go, no matter how much I pretend that it doesn't.
“Grace Ellen Morgan. Get your ass up here!” Ian's playful voice cuts through my silence. I peek my head up to see him standing at the top of the stairs, tapping his foot. Even from here I can see the wide grin across his face. I wave him off and lay my head back down. He can wait a few more moments.
“You just gonna hide out here all day, baby girl?” Alec's smooth voice fills my ears moments later, startling me. I shoot my head up and pin my eyes on my oldest brother. He smiles at me lovingly and takes a couple more steps down the dock until he’s standing feet from where I am laying.
“If it means avoiding Ian's taunting for a few minutes longer, then yes,” I say, smiling up at him. He nods, knowing full well what I mean and closes the distance between us. He sits down next to me, his long legs stretched out in front of him.
I pull my sunglasses down onto the bridge of my nose and peer up at my brother. While Ian made it out to my graduation with mom, I have not seen Alec in almost a year. It’s good to see time has not changed him. Rumpled brown hair that hangs across his forehead, his large, toned frame dressed in tan cargo shorts and a white t-shirt. He crosses his muscled arms in front of his broad chest and meets my gaze.
“How are you, Grace?” he asks. “I mean, really,” he adds, knowing full well that I will tell him everything is wonderful no matter what is going on with my life. Even with that knowledge, he still pushes for the truth. Unlike Ian, Alec has always had a way of reading me.
Ian is my cute, playful, snowboard loving, free spirited, artist of a brother. Alec is the more serious one. While I like to think that I know him well, like me, I know that he never truly lets people in. But he is my protector. The one who stepped into my father's shoes even though he was already away at college when Dad passed. Being ten years older than me, he has always been very protective of me and that fact increased one hundred fold when he became the eldest man in the family.
“I'm good,” I answer, sighing audibly as I rest my chin on my hand. “How's New York?” I ask. While the main reason I’m moving there is for Emma, it doesn't hurt that my oldest brother also resides there and will give me some sense of home in the craziness that is New York. “How's the business?” I tack on, referring to the software development company that he started a few years back with his college roommate. While he doesn't brag, I know how proud he is of their success, having created various apps for smart phones and other devices.
“It's good,” he says, being completely modest by how well he has done for himself. Not that I know what kind of money a business like that brings in, but from the way mom describes his downtown penthouse, I would say he makes more than he would ever need. “Sorry I couldn't make it out to see you graduate. Hell, I barely got away to come here for the week.” He shrugs. “We both know Mom would have killed me if I missed.” I can only nod my head in agreement, knowing full well that my mother would have been heartbroken had he not been able to make the trip. None of us has missed a year yet.
“No worries. It wasn't that big of a deal. Besides, my part lasted a whopping thirty seconds. The rest of the time you would have had to sit there and listen to them call out hundreds of names, and I can only imagine how dreadfully boring that would have been for you.”
“It would have been worth it, baby girl. You're a college graduate now. That's something to be very proud of.” He smiles at me.
I shrug. “Yeah, I guess. I'm just glad it's over. It was a great experience and all, but I’m ready to start living my life. College was just
a necessary step. I need publishing houses to take me seriously and having an English major is the first step in achieving that.”
“Hey, Alec,” a man's voice I don't recognize interrupts us. I twist my head to the side and instantly my mouth falls open.
Holy hell.
Zayne Evans. My brother’s college roommate and best friend has always been a looker, but I certainly was not prepared to lay my eyes upon the Godlike creature that is now hovering just feet from where my inappropriately covered body is laying.
“Your mom and Rob are here,” he says casually, his eyes finding mine for a fraction of a second before turning back to Alec.
“Thanks, man,” Alec says, pushing himself to his feet. “Come on, baby girl.” He leans down, holding his hands out to me. I push up on my knees, doing my best to make sure all areas are covered before taking his hands and letting him help me to my feet.
I turn, feeling ridiculously awkward and self-conscious, to face Zayne. The moment my eyes find him again, I have to physically force my knees not to shake. I haven't seen him since he came home for Thanksgiving with Alec my senior year of high school. And let’s just say, at that time I wasn’t in the frame of mind to notice how attractive he was, or really care for that matter.
He's tall, at least six feet or so. His shoulders are broad and his tight fitted gray t-shirt clings to every perfectly defined muscle across his chest and stomach. When my eyes finally make it back to his face, I falter.
Lord, this man is beyond gorgeous. How do I not remember him being so beautiful? Piercing blue eyes with lashes so thick that the deep shade is only that much more intense. His dark hair is short and messy and has what Emma would call 'the just fucked look'. And there’s a light dusting of facial hair covering his chiseled jaw.
I take a shaky inhale and try to gather my bearings.
“Zayne, right?” The question sounds stupid but considering it's been five years, it doesn't seem completely off the wall.
“Good to see you again, Grace.” He nods, his smooth voice causing my skin to prickle. He doesn’t give me more than two seconds of his attention before he’s talking to Alec again. “I'll see you up there,” he says, quickly turning and making his way back up the steps, two at a time. I can't help but watch him. The way his back flexes with each step, his massive calf muscles clenching with the movement.
“Why is Zayne here?” I turn to Alec, hoping my voice doesn't sound too strange.
“We’re in the middle of a huge deal with a major seller over this smart phone app Zayne and I have been working on. Like I said, I barely made it here. Lucky for me, Zayne agreed to tag along so we could work out some of the details before we are set to sell the rights next week,” he says, leaning down to retrieve my bathing suit cover. He hands it to me and I quickly slip it over my head before following him up the stairs.
“Alec Morgan. Get over here and give your mother a hug,” my mom demands with a huge grin on her face the moment we reach where they are all gathered on the back patio. Her eyes find me next and she smiles again, but I don't get the warm embrace that Alec does. Then again, my mom just saw me less than a week ago and hasn't seen Alec in months.
I’m the spitting image of my mother. All except for the blonde hair, which she keeps in a shoulder length bob. While Ian took after mom in that department, me and Alec have our father’s thick, brown hair.
Alec wraps her in a quick hug before releasing her, turning to shake Rob's hand.
Rob is a short, stocky guy. He keeps his brown hair in a buzz cut and always dresses in khakis and a polo. While I wouldn't classify him as attractive, he's not ugly. I guess I’m just programmed to think that any man that is not my father is not good enough for my mom. They made the perfect couple. Both strikingly beautiful and more importantly, completely in love. But since that love was ripped away, I can't help but feel anything but grateful to Rob. Mom met him about five years after Dad had passed. They started out as friends and then eventually started dating. They eloped two years ago and I have to admit, I have not seen my mom this happy since my dad was alive.
“Hey, Grace.” Rob tilts his head in my direction. I return his greeting and then wrap my mom in a quick hug before scanning the area for Emma. “She ran to the market with Ian,” Rob says, seeming to know exactly who I’m looking for.
Fantastic,” I mutter.
While Emma and Ian are both very fun, flirty people, the last thing I want is for Em to hook up with him or Alec. She never sticks to the same man for long and I would hate for something, like her hurting one of my brothers or vice versa, to come between our friendship. Besides, she's been part of my life for so long they are practically like her brothers, and it would be just plain wrong for her to cross that line.
“I'm gonna go change. Do you need any help with dinner?” I ask my mom, noticing several ears of corn laying across the picnic table.
“No, no. Rob and I will take care of dinner.” She shoos me away. I smile, knowing full well that she could use my help but doesn't really want it. It's no secret that I’m a disaster in the kitchen.
I throw my towel on the back of one of the chairs before heading inside. I peer around the large open floorplan before my eyes find their way to the second floor landing that oversees the first floor.
Completely alone.
I let out a loud sigh and proceed to climb the stairs to the second story. I turn and head toward my bedroom but stop abruptly when the door next to my room opens and Zayne steps out, nearly walking right into me.
“Oh, sorry,” I stutter out.
It feels like the air pings around us, a static pull that has my body reacting in a way that it most certainly should not.
Zayne's eyes meet mine for only a fraction of a second before he breaks contact and steps around me.
“No problem,” he murmurs, walking down the stairs without a backward glance. I stand there for a moment, watching him walk the length of the first floor.
He barely even looked at me.
I can't help but feel a little offended.
I shake my head, knowing full well that a man like Zayne Evans would not give me the time of day. And since when do I care about a man giving me anything? I have had zero interest in relationships since Kyle and now I'm practically drooling over my brother's best friend. What the hell is wrong with me?
I mentally slap myself across the face before making my way into my bedroom to change.
I’m a twenty-two year old woman. It’s perfectly normal to find a man sexually attractive, no matter how out of the ordinary it is for me. But what is really throwing me for a loop is that since the moment I looked at him on the dock, all I can think about is having him take me into an empty room somewhere and do unspeakable things to me.
Chapter Two
THE FIRST COUPLE OF days go by without a hitch. While I still have not recovered from my first encounter with the impossibly sexy Zayne Evans, it's been somewhat easier by his constant absence. He and Alec have spent a good portion of their time locked away in the first floor study, leaving me plenty of time to distract myself with other things. Other than coming out to eat, I have not seen or spoken to him.
I didn't realize how much that would bother me. For some unknown reason, I want him around. For the first time in years, I feel like a normal twenty-two year old, pining after my older brother’s best friend like a love sick school girl. How cliché. It does make me feel better to know that I am not the only one affected by the man.
Emma spent the entire first day after meeting him talking about how sexy he is and all the things she would like to do to him. While it was entertaining to hear her go on and on, I couldn't help but feel a little jealous. At least Em could have a shot with him if she wanted. Lord knows he hasn't looked my way in the last two days.
In fact, during mealtimes, when he actually makes an appearance, he manages to talk to everyone but me. I try not to be offended. I am, after all, his best friend’s much younger sister. But that still doesn't d
ull the sting over his obvious avoidance of me. Hell, he hasn't spoken one word to me since that first afternoon.
Deciding not to dwell on it, I agree to go out on Rob's boat with Ian and Emma. I love being out on the water, and the more distance I put between myself and the sex god sleeping in the room next to mine, the better.
After changing into Emma's red bikini, since I still have not made it into town to purchase my own, I throw on a pair of black knit shorts and a white tank and tie my hair in a messy ponytail before heading out to the dock. Emma and Ian are already on board. Ian hands me a beer out of the cooler the moment I step on the boat.
I smile as I take it from him, thinking way too hard about drinking it before allowing myself a taste. While it's bitter and extremely cold, it feels amazing on my throat and I take another long gulp before sitting on one of the long benches at the rear of the boat.
I stretch my legs out along the bench and make myself comfortable. Emma curls up next to me and Ian takes a seat behind the steering wheel. While the boat isn't huge, it's big enough for about ten people, so seeing how there is only three of us, we have plenty of wiggle room.
The boat is very standard. A small chair and steering wheel for the captain sits in the middle. The back is made up of three long benches, one on each side and then one along the back. The front of the boat is long and sleek, and while no one can sit there while the boat is in motion, it will make for a perfect lay out spot when we decide to stop and swim later.
“Room for two more?” I hear Alec call over the roar of the engine just before Ian puts the boat into gear.
I peer up over my sunglasses and have a mini heart attack at the sight of Alec climbing on the boat, Zayne following behind him. His eyes find mine and I immediately turn away from him. Two can play this game.
“Holy hell. You mean you're actually going to stop working for a few hours?” Ian laughs out bitterly.
“Shut up, Ian.” Alec shoves his shoulder. “Besides, we finished early and you know how much I love the water.” He takes a seat on the bench across from me. Zayne walks over to the back bench and flops down, but I do my best to keep my eyes on the water.
The Way Back Page 2