by Cassie Mae
“Yeah. But that doesn’t mean Maddie’s on her own.” He checks over his shoulder, and Demi pops her head inside the room, too. She’s wearing the shirt I bought her last time we went to the mall. I saw the Baby Yoda splayed on the front and insisted I get it for her. She groused but humored me. She wears it at least once a week.
Pete puts an arm around Demi’s shoulder and tucks her into his side. He looks more like a father than Dad ever has. “If Dem wants to stay with Maddie, then I’ll continue to support that.” He meets my gaze. “In whatever support you need.”
The love for my brother spreads through my body, and I swear there is absolutely no pain in my leg for the briefest of moments. He knew exactly how to phrase that. All I needed was him on my side. I never wanted the extra income or the extra body under the roof. He loves Candace, and I get that she is going to be his family. I also get that she’s our family, too. With him standing next to me, Demi under his arm, I feel like our cracked and bruised relationship has finally healed.
Dad pushes off my bed and turns to Dem. I catch the edge of his smile as he speaks to her. “I’m not going to sway your decision either way, Demi. I will be a better father to you than I was to your brother and sister. I know that in my heart.” He crouches down to her level, and she leans against Pete. “I also know, right from here”—he points to his heart—“that Maddie will give you a loving home. By some miracle, I didn’t mess her spirit up. If you’re happy here, you can stay for as long as you want. But… come see me more often, yeah?”
Demi’s eyes light up, and she quickly turns to Pete. “You promise you’ll help if Mad needs it?”
He takes a finger and makes an X over his heart. Dem’s shoulders rise with a deep inhale, then fall dramatically as she lets out a long breath. “I love you, Daddy. But… I want to stay.” Her voice cracks. “Is it okay if I stay?”
Dad pulls her in for a hug, and I catch Dem’s face over his shoulder. Her eyes fall closed, and she tucks into the warmth of our dad that I never got. It’s such a different reaction than I had from his touch, and it makes me happy that she still has that innocence in her about him. I pray that he proves me wrong, that he becomes a place of peace for her—for our whole family.
He drops his arms and rises, standing just as tall as Pete. He gives Pete a clap on the shoulder. “Good to see you, PJ.”
Pete hates that name, but he doesn’t mention it. “Good to see you sober, Dad.”
Dad turns to me, curling his lip into a half-smile. “I came to give you a talk, and you ended up putting me in my place.” He reaches for my hand again, and I give it to him, preparing for the unfamiliar brush, but something warm hits me deep in the gut instead. “I’m proud of you, Mads.”
And for the first time in years, I pull my father in for a hug.
It’s weird walking into Troublemakers, knowing it’s my last time here. The place is buzzing today. The bells and whistles from the arcade up the left staircase filter down to the main entrance, and I weave in and out of parents with their kids, teenagers on group dates, and a few college freshmen looking for where to grab an application.
Well, a spot just opened up, lucky ducks.
I head past the bustle to the manager’s offices. Candace is on shift today, and when I step inside, she meets my gaze with a frown.
“So… you’re leaving, huh?”
“Figured, I’d quit before any of you managers get in trouble.” I put my badge on the desk and take a seat across from her. The owner of Troublemakers, Mr. Malone, was contacted by the hospital, and Candace filled out an accident report. She mentioned that there would be disciplinary action against the employee, but I don’t want to take any chances on her being too soft on me. So I just bit the bullet and gave my two weeks’ notice… which didn’t last a day.
Her fingers slide across the desk and trap my badge. She pulls it to her and toys with the lanyard. “Have you thought about where you’re going to work?”
“Not really.” My mind’s been stuck on a repeat of Pete’s words at the hospital. I’ve relived them every day since, and every minute I spend with Maddie only increases the power they hold over me.
“There are a couple of positions at my parents’ offices.” She lifts a shoulder. “Not sure how good you are with customer service, or if that’s even interesting to you, but maybe worth a shot.”
“Thanks.” I won’t look into it. A desk job is too stagnant. I can plant my butt in a seat for extended time, but I can’t spend all of that without creating something.
I scratch at the hole in my jeans, right above the knee. Candace usually comments on the ragged state of anyone’s clothing, but she keeps her lips pursed together today.
“How is she doing?” I ask, knowing that’s what we both really want to talk about. I haven’t seen Mad in four days. We text, and I tell her I’m busy looking for jobs, when I’m simply avoiding her and punishing myself for the accident. Pete said I broke the rules just to get her to like me, to notice me, and I wonder just how much of that is true.
“She’s in the cast now.” Candace tosses my badge on her desk. “She insisted on getting back to work, so she’s starting at the farm on light duty tomorrow.”
“You think that’s a good idea?”
Candace lets out a hollow laugh. “Since when has Maddie taken my advice on anything?”
“What’s she gonna do on the farm?”
She lifts a shoulder. “Luke says he’s got some ideas. Most likely she’ll be picking out music to play for the horses while he grooms them.”
“Sounds like a good day’s work.”
She chuckles at my sore attempt at humor, then shakes her head, her smile evaporating as quickly as it appeared. “Why?” She lets out a long sigh and meets my gaze. “Why did you sneak her in, Tanner?”
“That’s a good question.”
“Do I get to hear the answer?”
The corner of my mouth twitches. The answer to that question is easy, simple, but it holds so much behind it and I wonder if Candace will understand. Candace doesn’t break rules. It’s how she got to management so quickly, why she’s so good at it. For the life of me, I don’t understand why she’s not smacking me around for betraying her trust.
She does deserve an explanation, though.
I stop picking at my jeans and blink up to her eyes. “I’d do anything for Maddie.”
Her head tilts slightly. “Why?”
“You know why.”
A smile teases her lips, and she leans back in her chair. “I want to hear you say it.”
An unexpected, jolting laugh falls from my mouth, and I shake my head and push to my feet. “Not before I say it to her.”
She playfully pouts and stands up as well. “I guess that’s only fair.” She walks around her desk and pushes up on her tiptoes. Her arms wrap around my shoulders, her long red-brown hair tickling my nose. “I’ll miss you around here.”
There was a time when I wanted Candace to show an ounce of affection for me. I dreamed about it, played it through my mind, much like I did with every other girl I had an infatuation for.
But as I give her a pat on the back and pull away, I know with one hundred percent certainty that I’ve never loved someone the way I love Maddie.
I reach out and bat the bill of her cap down over her eyes. “Yeah right. You’ll be happy to get someone else trained on the Wheel Zone.”
She wrinkles her nose and fixes her hat. “Or maybe someone who won’t commit a misdemeanor in the name of love.”
I grab at my heart and trip toward the door. “Ouch.”
She laughs and circles her desk to her chair. “Now go visit Mad before she loses her mind. She needs cuddles.”
I tilt my head back and forth and slip through the door. In normal circumstances, I’d jump on the opportunity to cuddle my girlfriend. But since it’s my fault she’s lost the chance at a sponsorship and she’s laid up in bed, I don’t know how I can sit there with her without apologizing over and over.
And she made it pretty clear last time I visited that I’m not allowed to do that anymore.
I weave through the crowded indoor amusement park and push the entrance doors with my butt, taking one last look before leaving for good. They didn’t exactly say I couldn’t set foot inside again, but I got the gist. I’ll have to find another place to board for a while.
It’s rush hour, and so I’m stuck at the corner crosswalk when I hear my name.
“Tanner!”
I look over my shoulder to a flustered Aislynn booking it across the Troublemakers lot. Her bundle of pink hair sprays from her Troublemakers cap, her yellow shirt lit up like neon in the setting sun.
The walk sign lights up, but I stay put and wait for her.
“You on break?”
“Kinda…” she wheezes, stopping short a few feet away. She catches her breath, hunching over. “Wanted… to say… bye.”
I chuckle and close the gap between us, swinging an arm around her shoulder. “It’s not like we won’t see each other.”
“I know.” Her ragged breath tickles the back of my neck, and she gives me an extra squeeze before pulling away. “But we won’t be working together. It’s different.”
I nod. I know that, but it hasn’t sunk in just yet. All I’m thinking about is Maddie. Her sponsorship. How she’s gonna make it without work for the next couple of weeks. What she’s going to do with her boarding.
Aislynn lets out a giant exhale and shakes her head. “Have you got a job lined up yet?”
“Nah. Haven’t really thought about it.”
“You probably should.”
“Yeah.”
She clucks and gives me a look like a mother chastising her kid.
“What?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” She crosses her arms. “You should finally start your channel.”
I let out a hollow laugh. “Sure got the time for it, don’t I?”
“Exactly,” she says, punching me in the upper arm. I was kidding, but she levels me with a dead serious gaze. “I want you to go home and upload something.”
My eyes widen. “I don’t have anyth—”
“Yes, you do. You carry that camera freaking everywhere. Put something together and upload it. Do something with that talent you’ve got. Heaven knows one of us should.”
Confusion pulls at my brow, but she pushes me toward the crosswalk before I can prod.
“Go. Send me the link when it’s done.” She jumps back in for a quick hug, then runs off toward Troublemakers. “Miss you!”
I give her a wave, holding back a laugh at her demands. What would I even post? The only thing I have is the video I did for Mad, and that was for an audition—not exactly something I could use for content.
Unless…
My mind starts to spin, and I spend the entire walk home in a swirl of cuts and breaks and music choices and footage I know I have sitting there on my computer. By the time I get to my front door, I know just what to do. And if I’m right, maybe Mad won’t have to say goodbye to her dream after all.
Get off that leg or I’ll sick Peaches on you.
Luke emphasizes his threat by signing the word bark at Peaches, and the Pomeranian mix gives a little woof.
I wobble on my crutches, the grooming brush in one hand while Pearl stands perfectly still. I’ve completely botched this grooming. I didn’t even know it was possible to botch a horse grooming, but here I am doing it.
My lips rumble much like a horses’, and I drop the brush on the shelf and wobble my way to a pile of hay. I land on the seat with a huff and a wince as a loose straw pokes me in the ass.
I can’t afford to not work for the six weeks I’m in the cast, but I can’t do a damn thing here. So far Luke has given me the job of choosing the music and “watching the chickens” while he ran to get more food. He’s been running around doing the job of two and pretending it’s not tiring him out.
“Let me do something,” I sign to him. He can’t hear, but I bet he knows I’m whining like a teenager with the smirk he gives me.
You can clear the emails in the office.
I hold back my groan and give him a nod. I’ll do office work—whatever I need to do to earn the money I make around here. Anything to keep me busy. Anything to keep me out of bed.
My crutches smack together with a clack, and Pearl startles from the sudden noise. “Sorry, girl,” I say, adjusting them under my arms and making my way to the office. The horses haven’t been too fond of my new way of getting around, bristling when they hear me coming. Amen, sisters. I’m not fond of it either.
The office is dark and dusty. Luke will occasionally come in here to make sure emails are getting answered, but that’s really a once every few days kind of thing. Mrs. Owen’s takes care of the business side for the most part while we do the dirty work. Though, if you ask me, she’s got the rougher end of the deal.
With it getting close to October, we’re getting more emails about the petting zoo and when the farm will open to the public. I fire the computer up and wait for the endless barrage of notification pings the moment it powers on.
I settle in the desk chair and tuck my chin into my hand. The office window looks out toward the drive, and I furrow my brow at the unfamiliar car pulling up behind Luke’s pickup.
A woman about mid-thirties steps from the driver’s seat. She pushes her sunglasses up onto her long blue and black hair, dark lipstick on her smiling lips. She’s wearing a loose tank top and a pair of leggings, the bright pink of the top complementing her dark skin tone. Each step she takes wobbles her entire body, and I follow the leggings down to a set of heels that are higher than all my shoes stacked on top of each other.
She looks like the last person who would step onto a farm on purpose. I shove up from the desk and grapple for my crutches. It takes me a good three tries to get out the front door.
“Hi,” I say, and her big eyes brighten when they land on me. “Can I help you?”
She tilts her head knowingly. “Madison Owens?”
I jerk back. “Um… yes.”
She wobbles her way over to me, her hand outstretched. “Breanne Feuller. I’m a huge fan of yours.”
I balance on my good leg and shake her very enthusiastic hand. When she just continues to smile at me, I awkwardly ask, “I’m sorry… I still don’t know—”
“Who I am?” She waves a dismissive hand. “I apologize. I’m a little starstuck.”
“Over me?” I laugh. I’m a nobody. I don’t even know where she’d find out about me.
“Of course.” She pulls her phone from her pink zebra printed purse. Her phone cover matches her bright pink top. She taps the screen and then tips it toward me. “That’s you, isn’t it?”
My brow lifts, and I lean in to get a better look.
It’s my audition video. There’s a caption underneath. Calling all boarding sponsors: this you HAVE TO SEE.
My heart thuds heavy before sinking deep in my stomach. “Um, yeah, that’s me. Before…” I gesture to my leg. “So, I probably won’t be on a board for a while.”
“But you will be on a board again.”
“I’m hoping.”
She grins, her white teeth beaming against the darkness of her lipstick. She tucks her phone into her purse. “I’m hoping, too. In fact, I’m willing to put my money where my mouth is.”
My spine straightens, and I almost fall off my crutches. Is she offering to sponsor my boarding? “Who are you?”
She lets out a tinkle of a laugh that is super sweet and homey. “Breanne Feuller. I own Grandeur Girls Boarding Company. And I’d love to talk to you about becoming a spokesperson for our brand.”
***
Two hours later, I’m practically leaping across the parking lot at Tanner’s apartment—well, as much as I can on crutches… and carrying a big ass pile of contract papers.
Breanne—she requested I call her by her first name—is building a boarding company catering to girls, encouraging them to dive into the
sport. It’s only been around for a few months, but it’s gaining traction, and she thinks with me as a spokesperson and mentor, it’ll get huge. The sponsorship starts at sixty grand a year, and with the caveat that I get my videographer and editor to create content for her business.
So not only will I be doing my dream job, I’ll get to do it with the guy I’m absolutely in love with… if he says yes.
I use my crutch to knock on his door, which bangs and thuds much louder than I intend. I laugh at myself and get so excited that my fingers slip on the papers in my hand.
Tanner swings the door open, and my contract goes flying, documents everywhere. The September wind takes them away, and I let out a squeal. “Shit!”
Tanner dives for them all, since he’s the best boyfriend in the world, no matter how hard he’s avoiding me right now. And I will tell him that till the cows come home.
I try to grab at the papers with my crutches, slamming down on a chunk before they fly away. Tanner manages to grab the few that go to the bushes, down the walkway, sticking in the creases of his neighbor’s door.
“What is all this?” he says through a laugh, chasing after a runaway page.
“A contract!” I sing. “You got me a sponsor, boyfriend.”
He slams his foot on the ground, trapping the page underneath his Vans. His bright green eyes meet mine, practically perfect circles, his jaw dropped.
“W-what?”
I bounce against my crutches, sharp pain pinching my pits, but I don’t care. Nothing will erase this grin. Nothing will take away this moment for me. “There’s a woman who owns a boarding shop, and she wants me for their spokesperson.” I gesture to the papers. “I wanted to go over all this with you.”
He taps the pages in his hands, straightening them best he can after crinkling them to death in the struggle to catch them. He closes the distance between us, his familiar scent and comforting warmth wrapping me up in a cozy blanket. His smile is distant, unsure as he bends and gathers the rest of the contract that I trapped under my crutch.