by Tina Beckett
He didn’t know the half of it, but Luca forced a shrug. “We were both wrong. So I guess there was no gloating to be done.”
Elyse added in a soft voice, “No, there wasn’t.”
But the disruption of a staff meeting followed by a two-hour argument over whose hypothesis they should follow had damaged their relationship. Not long afterward, the ax had fallen in the form of jobs disappearing.
She’d said she was sorry for that. And he believed her. But did it change anything? In some ways, maybe it did.
Their salads and antipasto came, and the conversation turned to food without him having to force the issue, which he was more than ready to do. If the subject of their breakup was going to be rehashed, he certainly didn’t want it to be in front of an audience.
Elyse speared a piece of lettuce and added one of the slivers of anchovies. He waited while she put the bite in her mouth. Her eyes widened.
“Verdict?”
“It’s salty. And quite strong. But I like it.” She tilted her head and looked at the other surgeons. “So your turn. What were your most disappointing cases?”
They each shared a case that had turned out badly. One had been human error, but the others had all been just the difficulty of coming up with a speedy diagnosis when things were already heading south. So he and Elyse weren’t the only ones who’d lost patients. And the PV case wasn’t his only difficult one, but it had been the most dramatic. And the one with the most personal repercussions.
Was there anything he could have done differently?
He wasn’t sure. If Elyse hadn’t already started to subtly withdraw from him, it might not have become the volcano it had. But she had. In tiny increments he hadn’t understood but which had become pronounced after the death of the patient.
Maybe it had been the fact that he and Elyse had worked too closely together. The emotions of their relationship had gotten in the way of how they’d dealt with that patient—he could see that now. It had also got in the way of how they’d responded to each other in the midst of that crisis. Sharp words had cut more deeply. Anger had seemed ten times more significant than it should have.
Her knee had shifted away from his when talking about the PV patient, but as the others had shared their defeats, she’d relaxed once again.
Her blond hair shimmered in the dimly lit restaurant. And with her expressive face, hands moving as she discussed disease processes, he could see why Lorenzo—or any man, for that matter—would be attracted to her. She had it all. Brains, beauty and an innate kindness that was rare. A man would be a fool not to be drawn to her.
Luca found himself staring at her, loving the way she smiled. And frowned. The sound of her voice. The way she listened intently as she tried to find her way around accents and unfamiliar words.
He pushed his plate away, just as she turned to him. “Do we need to check in with Emilia?”
“Maybe. I’m finished if you are.”
“I am.”
Luca motioned for the check and paid their bill.
She smiled at the table as they stood. “Thank you for entertaining me. I’m sure there are things you would have preferred to talk about other than medicine.”
Bergamini, who’d been the quietest of the bunch, said, “It’s always interesting to observe how we deal with difficult diagnoses.” He fixed Luca with a stare. “Sometimes we get it right. And sometimes we don’t. When that happens, we need to learn from our mistakes. And try not to repeat them.”
The man wasn’t talking about their cases. No wonder he hadn’t said much. He’d been “observing” but it had had nothing to do with medicine and everything to do with relationships. It stood to reason. He’d been married a long time, so he’d obviously figured out how to get it right.
Well, contrary to the man’s opinion, Luca had learned from his mistakes. He may not have gotten everything right, but he’d come out on the other side with some new ways of dealing with issues.
Mostly that meant not getting involved with the opposite sex. But was that because of the breakup? Or because he was still hung up on the mother of his child?
Soon they were out of the restaurant, the cool air showing the first hints of autumn. By the time Elyse left Italy, temperatures would be dropping at night and staying cooler during the day.
She glanced at him. “Hey. That case we had. It was a hard call. I’m sorry I was so hateful during that.”
“You weren’t hateful. Just...passionate.” He hesitated. “And just so you know, I wasn’t aware there was a possibility of a pregnancy that last night or I wouldn’t have left, I hope you know that.”
He tried to figure out how to express himself. “Our relationship had become like the PV patient: producing an unhealthy amount of tension with no way to drain it off.”
Treating polycythemia vera often meant drawing off excess blood in a phlebotomy session. It lowered the red blood cell count, lowering the risk of a heart attack or stroke.
She sighed. “Maybe it’s true what they say about business and pleasure. They need to be kept separate.”
“With us, there was no way of doing that. We were already involved and both in the same line of work.” He smiled. “And that’s what drew us together in the first place.”
“Really? That’s funny, because I was only interested in your...looks.”
That made him laugh, since that word had always been her euphemism for something else. “You were, were you?”
She tossed her hair over her shoulder and glanced back at him. “You were always pretty damned good in...the looks department.”
The joking faded away, at least on his part. She still thought that? Even after all that had happened? Well, hadn’t he just thought about how gorgeous she was a few minutes ago?
The attraction was still there on both sides. “I was staring at you back in the restaurant, thinking about how heartbreakingly beautiful you are and how I didn’t want Lorenzo Giorgino anywhere near you.”
She stopped in her tracks and turned to look at him. “Enzo doesn’t appeal to me at all. Oh, he’s nice enough, and he’s certainly good-looking, but I have a feeling he has a serial case of wandering eyes.”
Ah, so she had seen through him. “He tends to date a lot of different women. And I don’t like it that he has you calling him Enzo.”
“You don’t?” She smiled. “Well, you don’t have to worry. My sights were always set on a completely different Italian.”
Those words hung between them, and Luca moved a few steps closer, stopping right in front of her. “They were?”
“Yes.” The whispered word slid through his senses like silk, winding around them and holding them hostage.
He swallowed. “Do I know this Italian?”
“I would hope so.” Her palm went to the back of his head, fingers sliding beneath the hair at his nape, sending a shudder through him.
“Because...it’s you, Luca.”
CHAPTER EIGHT
HIS KISS TOOK her by storm, the awareness that had been bubbling just beneath the surface finally blowing the lid from the pan.
She loved the feel of his mouth on hers.
She always had. She’d ached for him since the day she’d landed in Italy. Long before that, actually.
She wanted him.
Desperately.
She was no longer his boss; there was no need to worry about consequences or what would happen tomorrow. They’d be dealing with each other for the rest of their lives. Wouldn’t it be better if they were on good terms?
She shut down the center of her brain that sent out a warning that good terms and sex were not necessarily one and the same.
The kiss deepened, his tongue playing with the seam of her mouth.
God, she wanted to let him in. She pulled back, glancing pointedly at the door to the restaurant. They were still within t
wenty yards of it. She didn’t want Lorenzo or any of the others seeing them. If this was going to happen, she wanted it to be in a place where it was just her...and him. “Let’s go somewhere else.”
“We can’t go home.”
Home. Did he even realize he’d said that as if it were her home too? She forced herself not to analyze that too closely. Especially since the word had been said against her lips in a way that pushed her closer to a line she recognized all too well.
“Hotel?”
“They’ll be filled with tourists.” He stared into her eyes. “How adventurous are you?”
“If you mean sex on a zip line, probably not that adventurous.” She smiled. “We could always go back to your office.”
“Mmm...” He smiled. “We’ve done the office bit once before. I was thinking of somewhere a little more intimate. Where we’re guaranteed our privacy.”
“Sounds promising.” She slid her thumb over his lips. “So where is this mysterious place?”
“My car.”
A ripple of excitement went through her. Luca always had brought a hint of danger to his lovemaking, going as far as sliding his hand under her dress once in an empty elevator. He hadn’t taken her over the edge but had gotten her so desperate that she’d attacked him as soon as they were back in her apartment.
“And I know the perfect parking place. Are you up for it?”
“Yes.” She trusted him not to put her in a position where she would be embarrassed.
He drove a few miles, his hand high on her thigh, reminding her of that encounter in the elevator. But this time he didn’t venture any farther. Somehow that heightened her anticipation. Made her want him that much more. Fifteen minutes later, they pulled up in front of a gated house. No lights were on. “Are they home?”
“No, but it doesn’t matter. We’re not going inside. Reach into the glove box. There’s a remote.”
She quickly handed it over and watched as he pushed the button, sending the gates sliding in opposite directions.
“It’s a friend’s,” he said. “I’m watching it for him.”
“No cameras?”
“No.”
“Ah...so this is what you meant.”
“Yes. No one’s around.” He followed the driveway around to the side, where they were concealed from the nearby houses by a natural screen of vegetation. “The neighbors all know my car, and that I’ll be popping in periodically to check on things.”
“This probably isn’t what your friend had in mind.”
He turned off the engine and leaned over to kiss her. “Oh, I plan to check on things.”
Lord, those “things” were starting to heat up. The thought of having sex in a car was suddenly the only thing she wanted to do. It was a first. One of many she’d had with this man.
But... She needed to do something before they reached the point of no return. Give him time to back out. Placing her hands on either side of his face, she held him a few inches away from her. “I have to tell you something. The last time we kissed, well... Something happened. Something you need to know about.”
He gave her a wolfish grin. “Don’t worry. It made some things happen to me as well.”
“No, this was...embarrassing. My...um, breasts started tingling. Like when I get ready to nurse Anna.”
His eyes widened. “That’s why you pulled away?”
She nodded.
“Dio. I thought...” He closed his eyes and pressed his forehead to hers. “Never mind. It doesn’t matter.”
“Are you sure?”
Instead of answering, he leaned over and undid her seat belt, hands going to the bottom of her T-shirt and tugging it over her head. Her bra soon followed. “All I want to think about right now is you. And me. And what we’re about to do.”
Then he let himself out of the car.
“What are you doing?”
He opened her door and took her hand.
“I thought you said we weren’t going inside.”
“We’re not, but it’s a beautiful night. And I want to see you in the moonlight.”
She stepped out of the car, trusting him when he closed the door and turned her around. He gathered her hair in his hand and leaned over to kiss her neck. “We’re not going any farther than the hood of the car, where we’re not cramped, and I can do this.” His arms came around her and palmed her breasts, the sweet friction on her nipples making her moan.
“Dio. I love the sounds you make. Love what they do to me.”
His hands slid over her torso and rounded her hips. Then his fingers walked down the backs of her thighs, the flow of cool air hitting her legs as he scrunched the fabric of her long gauzy skirt in his hands, his teeth still skimming the sides of her neck. It was heady and naughty, and she was frantic with need.
He’d always been good at this.
How she’d missed it. Missed him.
She gasped when he bent her over the hood of the car, which was still warm from the drive over. He braced his hands on either side of her, his hips pressed tight against her bottom.
Giving a shaky laugh, she said, “I don’t think the nuns would approve of my attire right now.”
“Maybe not, but I approve con tutto il mio cuore.”
He played with the elastic of her boy-shorts. “I have missed your ridiculous choice of undergarments.”
But it was said in a way that was the opposite of ridiculous. Evidently she wasn’t the only one who’d missed things. She loved it when he mixed Italian with English. The more caught up he got, the more he reverted to the language of his heart. And it tugged at hers, turning her insides to mush.
Then those shorts were being pushed down. “Step out of them.”
Gladly. And when his leg came between hers and urged them apart, she swallowed, spreading for him.
She would be lucky if she lasted until he was inside her. His wallet landed on the car next to her. Just when she was trying to figure out what he was doing, she heard the ripping of foil packaging.
Oh, God, she was so desperate for him, she hadn’t even thought of protection—or the fact that she no longer needed it. An arrow ripped through her heart and came out the other side. The pain was short-lived, though, because right now nothing was more important than being with him.
The slow snick of a zipper made her heart pound.
So close.
There was a momentary pause as she imagined him rolling the condom down his length. Then he was back, and one hand slid under her rib cage, finding her nipple without hesitation, pulling hard and strong in rhythmic strokes.
“Ahh...” The sound came out as a long breath of air.
“You make my loins want to explode.”
The odd wording would have made her giggle under normal circumstances, but right now she had never felt less like laughing in her life. Her body wound hard and tight with the continued stimulation. She’d never felt anything like this in her life.
She should ask him to slow down, but she didn’t want to. Wasn’t even sure she was capable of speech right now.
And that spring inside her was slowly twisting, getting closer and closer to the breaking point. She pushed her hips back, finding him briefly only to have him slide back out of reach.
“No!”
“What do you want, cara?” he squeezed her nipple and held it tight.
She pressed her lips together to keep from crying out, but the words spilled past the barrier. “I want you inside me. Please.”
“Yes! Dio.” His initial thrust was hard and fast, filling her completely.
A second later, she went off, her body contracting crazily around him.
He grabbed her hips and stabbed into her with an intensity that made her breathless and weak.
Then he gave a hoarse shout, before going completely still, strain
ing inside her for several long seconds.
Then he slowly relaxed, curving his body over hers and staying right where he was.
He was still for what seemed like an eternity but was probably only minutes.
“Hell, Ellie, that was...”
“I know.” His use of that pet name brought tears to her eyes. Ever since she’d arrived, he’d called her Elyse.
Until now.
What had happened to them? How had life become such a damned struggle? But that was then. This was now. So what was holding them back from being together?
He eased out of her and turned her around to face him. He leaned down and gently kissed her, even as he crumpled the empty foil from the condom. That act made the tears that had been teetering on the edge of her lashes overflow their banks.
That. That’s what was holding her back.
Stopping, he looked at her. “What’s wrong?”
She gave him a shaky smile. “Hormones.” It was a lie. But it was all she had.
“You’re sure?”
“It’s just been a while. I’m good. Just weepy in general.” About the fact that they would never again produce a beautiful baby like Anna. That suddenly seemed like the biggest tragedy imaginable.
He nodded as if knowing he needed to give her a little space. Handing her the discarded pieces of clothing, he turned to give her privacy, zipping himself back into his khakis. Hurrying to get dressed, she dried her eyes, grateful to him. And very glad that this had happened here rather than at his place or, worse, at his parents’ house. If it had to happen, better for it to be on neutral ground. Ground that she would never see again.
“Thank you,” she said.
“For what?”
She wasn’t sure. The gift of being with him one more time, maybe? “For not being weirded out by my crazy emotions.”
“I have never been, how did you say...‘weirded out’ by anything to do with you.” He tipped her chin up. “We are good?”
“Yes. We are.” Good, but still not back together. There were no words of undying love. Which she was glad of, right? That would only create complications further down the road that neither of them wanted. His life was here now. And hers was back in the States. Anna was the only thing linking them.