My hands move to his stomach, feeling the ridges.
Jack breaks our kiss. Reaching his hand to the back of his neck, he grabs hold of his T-shirt and pulls it off over his head in that sexy way that guys do.
He tosses the shirt aside.
My eyes drop lower.
He’s cut. My God, is he cut.
My fingers reach out, tracing the lines of his muscles. He has a tattoo on his right bicep.
“Keep looking at me like that, and I will fuck you against this wall.”
My eyes lift to his.
The way he’s looking at me …
I can’t remember any man looking at me with as much heat in his eyes as Jack is right now.
“Alpha much?” I smirk.
So does he.
Then, he kisses me again. Harder. Needier.
I wind my fingers into his hair.
His hand slides slowly up my waist, his thumb grazing the underside of my boob.
Touching yet not touching anywhere nearly enough.
“You want my hands on you?” he murmurs, lips peppering kisses to the side of mine.
“Yes.”
His hand covers my breast over my shirt, thumb grazing over my nipple.
“Oh God,” I moan.
“He ain’t here. But I am.”
Jack’s hand is on my breast. His thigh moving against my clit. His erection rubbing against my stomach. His tongue back in my mouth.
I’m powerless to resist.
It’s been so long. Too long since I’ve felt like this.
And if I’m being honest, I don’t think I have ever felt this good.
“Jack … I …”
“Hush, baby. I’ll get you there.” He sweeps his tongue over my lips, biting down on the bottom one. He kisses across my jaw to my ear. His fingers tweak my nipple. His teeth graze my earlobe. His thigh presses against me.
And I go off like a rocket. Falling apart in his arms.
I can’t even think about how vulnerable I am to him right now.
Without a doubt, I would fall to the floor from the force of that orgasm if it wasn’t for Jack holding me up.
I’m out of breath, panting.
Jack’s lips press soft kisses to my feverish face. “You’re so fucking hot when you come.”
His mouth comes to mine, kissing me.
I can already feel myself starting to come down from the high he just gave me.
I can also feel the shame coming in. The failure at not even being able to stick to my own stupid rules because of a gorgeous face.
Okay, it’s not just his face. I like Jack.
But I’m the way I am for a reason. Getting close to anyone is a bad idea.
I need to get out of here.
“Jack …”
“Audrey.” He rests his forehead to mine, eyes holding me still.
“I … we … shouldn’t …”
“Yes, we should.”
“I can’t …”
“You like me, Audrey. That much is obvious from the way you came against my leg.”
His words are crass. They should offend me. But they don’t. Because all they do is make me feel hot.
“And I like you,” he continues. “That much is obvious from this.” He presses his hard erection against my stomach, making me squirm.
Surely, I can’t want more from him already after that spectacular orgasm he just gave me.
His hand lifts to my hair. Brushing it back, he tucks it behind my ear. “So, what’s stopping you?”
“I … it’s complicated.” My eyes slide to the side.
He captures my chin in his palm, bringing my gaze back to his. “Are you married?”
“God, no.” I laugh.
“In a relationship?”
“No.”
“You like me?”
“Don’t seek compliments.” I roll my eyes. “You know I do.”
“Then, there’s nothing complicated about it. Only if you choose to make it so.”
I sigh. He doesn’t understand. And I can’t explain it to him. Because truthfully, sometimes, I don’t fully understand it myself.
“I know I’m going ass-backward about this, and this is not the way I intended to do this at all. But let me take you out on a date.”
I stare at him. He’s gorgeous. Smart. Sweet.
And I’m … well, I’m kind of a bitch.
“Why?”
He looks confused. Surprised almost.
“Why do you want to go out with me?”
“Do you really need me to state the obvious?”
“Aside from the fact that I make your dick hard.”
He likes that. I see it from the flare in his eyes.
“You do make my dick hard. Painfully hard.”
I roll my eyes. “I’m serious.”
“So am I.”
“I have been nothing but a bitch to you from day one.”
“Maybe I’m a masochist.”
“Jack …” I sigh.
He chuckles. “Okay. Yeah, you can be a bitch. But believe it or not, I like that about you, Audrey. I like that you don’t take shit from me or anyone. But that’s not all you are. You can be funny when you want to be.”
“I’m also a loner.”
“Me too.” He smiles. “Don’t sell yourself short, Audrey. You’re kind. I see the way you are with my Eleven.”
“Just because I like your cat doesn’t mean I’m a good person.”
“No, but taking her in when you thought she was lost does. And I think you’re forgetting the time you broke into my apartment because you were worried that I was hurt.” He’s smirking.
“You’re an ass.”
“I do have a nice ass. But yours is better.” He squeezes my butt with his hand.
I like this playful side of him. I like it a whole lot.
But I still shouldn’t go out with him.
I press my hand to his chest. “I can’t date you, Jack.”
It’s his turn to sigh. “One date, Audrey. Just give me that. One date, and if that doesn’t change your mind about me … us … then I’ll leave you alone. What do you say?”
I stare at him. Beautiful, stunning Jack. Who’s ignited something inside of me, making me feel almost alive again.
If I go out with him this one time, then I don’t have to do it again. There’s nothing saying I have to keep dating him.
Maybe I’ll go out with him and think he’s a total jackass after spending actual, real time with him. It could stop this thing between us from raging on.
Or it could stoke it further.
I mentally sigh, already knowing what I’m going to say before I do it.
“Okay,” I say. “One date. And that’s it.”
He smiles widely. “That’s all I need.”
I agreed to this date, and I have been antsy about it ever since. I’ve thought about canceling a hundred or so times over the last twenty-four hours.
I know going out with Jack is a bad idea.
It’s breaking all my rules.
But … a part of me also wants to go out with him.
It’s been so long since I just did something simple, like go to dinner with someone.
I figure it can’t hurt just this once.
And it doesn’t mean I have to do it again.
He said one date, and that’s all it will be.
We might not even like each other after this date. Maybe the spark that had ignited between us went out yesterday after our hallway interlude.
Oh, who am I kidding?
I haven’t stopped thinking about his hands on me, the way he kissed me, since the moment I left his place.
Pretty sure I dreamed about him last night too.
What I need to do is use this date as a way to stamp out our attraction to each other.
I’m not exactly sure how to do that … but I figure that I’ll think of something when the time comes.
I’ve always been a fast thinker on my feet. Planning has
always been my weakness.
I’m a fly-by-the-pants kind of girl.
Jack said he would pick me up for our date at two p.m. Seems early for a date, so I wonder what we’re doing.
Not that it really matters.
Well, it shouldn’t matter.
And the sooner we go out, the sooner it’ll be over with, and I can come back home.
I’m sitting, waiting for Jack to knock on my door.
I was ready for our date in record time. I’m not wearing any makeup. I haven’t in a long time. I have to admit, I do miss the fun of putting on makeup. But when you want to blend in like I do, you don’t dress your face up, avoiding attracting any form of attention to it. Not even if going on a date.
Especially when I don’t want him to like me any more than he already does.
Jack told me to wear warm clothes and walking shoes for our date. Which works for me. I’m not one for dressing up anymore.
So, I’m wearing jeans and an off-the-shoulder dark blue sweater with a white tank underneath it and my furry tan UGG snow boots.
My parker coat, scarf, and gloves are sitting beside me, ready to be put on.
It snowed again overnight, so it’s lying nice and thick on the ground.
There’s a knock on my door, and aside from the fact that I’m expecting Jack, I know it’s him from the way he knocks.
How pathetic is it that I’m familiar with his knock?
Ugh.
I open the door to him, and he looks beautiful. He has on his usual attire. Instead of a T-shirt under his leather jacket though, he’s wearing a dark blue knit sweater.
We unknowingly coordinated our clothes.
My heart does a hard bang in my chest.
“We match.” I gesture to his sweater.
He glances at my top and smiles. “Do you want me to go change?”
God, he’s so lovely. I hate that.
“No.” I shake my head.
“So, you ready to go?” he asks.
“Yeah. Just let me grab my coat.”
Leaving the door open, I put on my warm things and slip my wallet and phone in one of the pockets. My rape alarm is already in the pocket.
Taking a rape alarm on a date, how romantic.
But I never leave the house without it. And after my experiences, I would be stupid to do so.
I trust Jack as much as I can trust a person. But you never really know anyone.
“Okay, let’s go,” I tell him.
He catches hold of my gloved hand, stopping me. “You look real pretty today,” he tells me. “But then you always do.”
My stomach swoops and dives like a flock of birds are in there.
I really need him to stop being so sweet.
“You do too. Look nice, I mean.”
His lips quirk into a smile, lighting up his eyes. He squeezes my hand before letting go. “Come on. Let’s go have some fun.”
I lock up behind us, and we start walking down the hall, heading for the stairwell.
He gestures to the motorbike helmet that he has in his hand. It’s matte black with a design of pink flowers on it. Not his usual all-black helmet that he has.
“You okay on the bike?” he asks me.
“Sure.” I shrug. “I’ve never ridden on one before, but it’s just the same as a car, right? But without doors and windows. And a seat belt. So, actually, it’s nothing like a car.”
Jack chuckles. “You’ll be fine. You’re safe with me, Audrey.”
God, I hope so, my heart whispers—and she doesn’t mean the bike.
We exit the building, Jack holding the door open for me like a gentleman, and we walk over to his motorbike.
I have zero clue when it comes to bikes. All I know is that his bike is big and black and has Triumph written in silver letters on the side of it.
We stop beside his bike, and Jack hands me the helmet. I take it from him. I had the foresight to do my hair into a loose over-the-shoulder plait, making it easier for me to get the helmet on.
Jack opens a helmet bag fixed to the back of his bike and pulls out his usual helmet.
I’ve got my helmet on fine, but I’m struggling with the chin strap.
“Here, let me help.” Jack stands close in front of me. So close that I can feel the warmth of his minty breath on my face. “It’s new, so the strap will be a little stiff.”
I freeze—and not from the cold. “The strap is new?”
His smiling eyes meet mine. “Yeah, it came with the new helmet.”
“You bought a new helmet?”
“Well, yeah. I only had the one, and I couldn’t let you ride without one.”
He bought a helmet for me.
He. Bought. A. Helmet. For. Me.
It’s not a big deal.
Yes, it is. It’s a huge deal!
He must see something in my eyes that prompts him to say, “It’s not a big deal, Audrey.”
“It’s not?”
“You can’t ride without a helmet, so I got you one. It’s that simple.” He shrugs.
Maybe it’s not a big deal. Maybe I’m just out of practice at this whole peopling thing.
But still … he bought this just for me. Yes, it’s just a helmet. But it’s still a kind and thoughtful thing to do.
Ugh!
I’m only ten minutes into this date with him, and I’m a puddle of melted goo on the floor.
So much for shutting down my attraction to him.
Although, in my defense, he isn’t exactly making it easy for me to do so.
He’s making it so, so much harder.
And I’m starting to realize that maybe there is no way for me to stop liking Jack.
So, I guess I’m left with the only thing I can do … make Jack dislike me.
Jack parks the bike outside a double-story brick building. It has a covered porch out front with steps leading up to the door. It could almost be a house. I look up at the sign on the building—Animal Adoption and Rescue Center.
Huh.
We must be going somewhere nearby.
I clamber off the back of his bike, none too gracefully. My legs feel wobbly.
It has nothing to do with the fact that I had my front pressed up against Jack’s back and my arms wrapped around his stomach for the last fifteen minutes.
Oh no, it’s totally from the bike ride.
And that was sarcasm if you didn’t catch it.
I fiddle with the chin strap, trying to undo it, but it’s a tricky little fucker.
Still straddling his bike, Jack removes his gloves and takes off his helmet. He puts it in the helmet bag.
Using his hand, he shoves his hair back off his face. His waves fall into place.
I bet when this helmet comes off my hair, it will be stuck to my head, like a sweaty mess.
He looks perfect.
Gorgeous. Sexy. And so very cool.
He’s like a character out of the books I read. All broody and hot. Ex-military, now writer. Alpha with a side of nerdiness that makes all the girls swoon.
But I’m not swooning.
Okay, I’m totally swooning.
I’m stopping now.
Any … minute … now …
Jack swings a long leg over the bike and comes to stand in front of me. “Let me.” He brushes my hands away from the strap, which I stalled on, taking over.
His nearness sets me off again.
And I’m standing here, just gawking at him.
Because, you know, he’s so damn attractive.
In my defense, any girl would find it hard not to stare at Jack.
It would be like asking the stars not to shine at night. Im-frigging-possible.
The clasp clicks open, freeing me from the helmet. Jack gently pulls the helmet off for me.
“Thanks,” I say, hastily smoothing back the strands of hair stuck to my forehead and cheeks.
My cheeks are warm from the helmet heat and the internal heat that I have going on.
I sweep my br
aid back around over my shoulder, checking that it’s still in decent shape.
When I look up, I catch Jack watching me.
“What?” I say self-consciously, giving my braid a tug.
His lips curve into one of those easy smiles of his. Stepping closer, he tucks a strand of hair I missed behind my ear.
Everything inside of me stops.
His finger traces around the outer shell of my ear, making me shiver. “Nothing.” He shakes his head, eyes holding mine captive. “I just like looking at you.”
Right back at ya, babe.
Obviously, I don’t say this.
I just swallow down, feeling every single thing in this moment.
The heat in his eyes. The caress of his warm fingers against my cooling skin. The sentiment of his words.
I’m starting to quickly realize that the feelings I have for Jack aren’t just entirely sexual.
And that’s not good.
I don’t want to feel like this every time he is near me or touches me or says something nice to me.
What I want to feel is nothing at all.
Maybe it was a mistake, coming on this date.
I take a step back away from him, moving my eyes down to the ground.
I don’t want to see the disappointment in his eyes that I undoubtedly put there.
You want him to stop liking you. This is the way to do it. Being cold. Acting like a bitch.
Only Jack doesn’t deserve any of it.
And now, there’s this awful silence between us that not even the noises of passing cars and people walking down the busy street fill.
“So …” I start, needing to say something. “Will your bike be okay, parked here?”
“Here is as good as anywhere.” He hangs my helmet on one of the handlebars.
“Will that be safe to leave hanging there?” I ask, gesturing to the helmet.
He only just bought it, and I would hate if someone stole it.
Also, I’m a little attached to it.
Attached to a motorbike helmet. Stupid, I know. Because it’s not like I plan on riding on the back of his bike again after today.
It’s just that he was sweet to buy it for me. And I really need to stop thinking of Jack as sweet.
“Yeah, it’ll be fine.”
He seems unconcerned, and I guess it’s not like I’m back in Chicago, where you can’t leave a piece of gum out without someone stealing it.
“So, where are we going then?” I ask him.
“Here.” He tips his head in the direction of the building we’re standing outside of.
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