by K. Webster
I scoff and Roux shoots me a sour look. Our mother is selfish and doesn’t give a shit about our environment or well-being.
“You can’t talk sense into Miranda,” Mike says, voicing what both Roux and I are thinking. “I dated the woman in one of her rare ‘good’ moments and it was evident I couldn’t do a thing to help her or those kids because she was stubborn and wouldn’t allow it.”
“Me and Roan will run away,” Roux threatens. “If she tries.”
Ms. Frazier shakes her head. “Bad idea, honey. They’ll just find you and put you back. God only knows how unsafe that would be for the two of you. Always on the run. No food or money. Terrible idea.”
Roux pouts. I’m irritated that it’s no longer a viable option for us. When it was just Roux and me, I never thought twice about taking her. But Ms. Frazier is right. Not to mention, we’d be forced to leave everyone we care about.
I can’t leave Hollis.
Not now.
There has to be a better solution.
“We could just wait for her to get fucked up again,” I offer with a shrug. “It’s only a matter of time. Then, maybe she’ll back off.”
Ms. Frazier doesn’t chide me for my language. “And if she doesn’t?”
“I don’t know,” I admit grumpily. “We can’t leave, though. She’s right about that, Roux.”
Roux scowls at me. “Since when did that plan change?”
“Since we started connecting with people.” I wave around the room. “Do you really want to leave them?”
“No,” she admits sadly. “Kelsey and I were just planning my birthday party.”
I hate my mom so fucking much right now.
If only she’d leave us the hell alone, Roux could continue on with planning her fourteenth birthday party and I could continue on with my relationship with Hollis.
Secret relationship.
As though he senses my thoughts, he draws his hand away from my back. He’s respecting my wishes. I hate that we have to hide.
Do we, though?
Aren’t these people we can trust?
“I have a boyfriend and I don’t want to leave him,” I tell Roux, ignoring the burning stares. I’m worried that Hollis will be pissed at me for blurting that shit out. Instead, he takes my hand and threads our fingers together.
“No one is going to make you leave your boyfriend,” Kelsey assures me in her sweet, motherly voice. I believe her.
“Oh, my,” Ms. Frazier says. “I didn’t realize…I thought you two were friends…”
“Boyfriend?” Mike’s voice comes out gritty and confused. “What?”
I turn and meet his eyes. “Hollis is my boyfriend. We didn’t want to say anything, because I was worried about how that might impact my getting to keep Roux with me.”
Hollis’s thumb swipes over mine, comforting me with such a simple touch. “Everything he does is for Roux. I respect that.”
“But it shouldn’t be held against me,” I bite out. “So, fuck it, that’s the truth. No more hiding.”
Ms. Frazier nails me this time. “Language.”
“Sorry,” I grumble.
“Your relationship with my son has nothing to do with Roux’s well-being,” Kelsey assures me, squashing any self-doubt I have. “You’re allowed to be happy, Roan. And so is Roux. All we can do is strive to make that happen and pray for the best.”
Mike nods and pats Kelsey’s thigh. “She’s right. Just keep being kids and stay away. If she comes to the door, don’t answer. I don’t know that she’ll go to the cops, but there’s no way we can stop her. Our best bet is to hope she doesn’t.”
Kelsey invites Mike to stay for an early supper and Roux runs off to go see Charlotte. Ms. Frazier heads to the kitchen to start dinner. It’s freeing to hug Hollis to me and no one look at us funny. I was sure Mike would, but he didn’t seem to be bothered, just surprised.
“You okay?” Hollis asks, his hand squeezing mine.
“Not really.” I notice he’s trembling. “Are you okay?”
“Feeling dizzy.”
“Come on. You need to go lie down until dinner. I’ll walk you up.”
He doesn’t argue and clings to me as we go up the stairs. It’s another thing to worry about. Not only is my mom being a bitch, but my boyfriend is sick. As soon as he flops onto the bed, he passes out. I curl up next to him and pull out my phone to text Jordy.
Me: Mom came by trying to get Roux. Everything is fucked up right now.
He responds immediately.
Jordy: She can’t go back there!
Me: I know this, asshole.
Jordy: It won’t happen.
Me: I hope not.
Jordy: It. Won’t. Happen.
I wish I believed his words.
Hollis
“Wake up, English!” Coach roars, his booming voice echoing in the gym.
Jordy steals the ball and tears down the court with it. He shoots and makes the basket, which sends Coach into a frenzy. I know he’s yelling at me, but I can’t focus on his words. The gym spins around me. My heart is racing in my chest and I feel like I’m going to puke.
“Hollis!”
I black out, still fully aware of what’s around me but unable to do anything about it, and stumble. My shoulder hits the gym floor hard as I crash to it. Strong hands grip my arms and roll me to my back. Squinting my eyes, I’m happy to see Roan.
Worried.
Freaked out.
Panicking Roan.
Our teammates crowd around us, including Coach.
“Hollis,” Coach says, his voice calm and soothing. “Look at me. How many fingers am I holding up?”
“Three,” I croak out.
“What happened, kid?” he asks, frowning.
“I, uh, I blacked out.”
“He needs to go to the nurse,” Roan grinds out. “Someone help me.”
“Nurse Jones isn’t there after school,” Coach says. “Why don’t you take him on home?”
Roan nods as he helps me to my feet. Cunningham is right there at my side, offering to help but gets shoved out of the way by Jordy.
“Got this, Cuntingham,” Jordy practically snarls at him.
They walk me to the locker room and I’m starting to feel better. Neither of them lets me go. When we get inside, they sit me on a bench and Roan kneels in front of me, taking both my hands.
“We need to go to the doctor,” he says, his voice urgent.
Jordy hovers nearby like a fucking vulture, just waiting for me to die so he can feast on my bones.
“I’ll be fine,” I mutter.
“Dude,” Jordy grunts out, “you look like you’re about to die.”
“I’m not about to die.” I shoot him a nasty look. “Try not to look sad about that.”
Jordy smirks at me. “My boy likes you for some dumbass reason. So you don’t get to die, rat. Sorry.”
“This fucking guy,” I grumble, rolling my eyes. “How do you put up with him?”
Roan laughs. “You’re both about evenly matched on stressing me the hell out. Maybe you two should start a ‘How Can We give Roan a Heart Attack Today’ club?” He rises to his feet. “Come on, babe, let’s go.”
Babe.
I dart my eyes over to Jordy to gauge his reaction. He cocks his head to the side, studying his best friend with intensity. Roan pulls me to my feet and hugs me to him.
“I guess you’ve probably guessed it by now,” Roan says to Jordy.
“You’re fucking the rat.” Jordy’s nostrils flare.
“He’s my boyfriend, and we’re fucking each other.”
Jordy’s eyes widen slightly. “Since when, dude? You fuck girls.”
“And when have I ever really liked one?” Roan demands. “You gave me shit about fucking anything that walked. Even you thought it was weird.”
“But him?” Jordy asks.
“I can’t explain it,” Roan says. “It just is. I like it. I like him. You’re my best friend. It shouldn’t
matter who I date.”
Jordy eyes me warily before shrugging his shoulders. “Whatever, man. I always have your back, even if you’re slumming it in the gutters with a rat.”
“My rat,” Roan says, kissing the top of my head.
“Rat lover,” I joke back, poking him in the ribs.
Jordy eyes us back and forth before shaking his head. “Fucking weirdos. Text me later, Roan.”
I wake up sweaty and confused. A heavy boy is draped over me in my small ass bed and he’s snoring. I’d smile, savoring the moment, if I didn’t feel like I was going to combust from heat. I kiss his head and then ease out from beneath him. From down the hall, I can hear BTS playing on Charlotte’s stereo and Roux laughing at whatever antics my sister is pulling. I’m thirsty as hell, so I go on a hunt for water. I’ve just stepped off the bottom stair to head for the kitchen when I overhear Mom in the living room.
“I understand that, Garrett,” she hisses. “But it’s not that easy.”
I should walk toward the kitchen and make myself known. Instead, I eavesdrop on her conversation with my dad.
“Stop.” A huff. “Listen to yourself.” Pause. “He’s not answering because you killed him with your hateful words!” Her voice breaks and so does my heart. “He’ll speak to you when he’s ready.” Pause. “If you just show up, you’re going to upset him more.”
A sharp pain lances through my stomach.
Dad? Coming here? Fuck no.
“Yes, Garrett, you’ve made it perfectly clear that you’re a surgeon as if I weren’t the one to raise your children while you built your career.” Another pause. “Your sorries come too late.”
I sit down on the bottom step, my hands shaking profusely.
“I’ll get him to the doctor. And if he wants you to know, he’ll take your call.” A pause. “Yes, I know you’re worried. We all are. Yes, I believe he’s anemic among other things.” A heavy sigh. “I’ve told you all the symptoms. He doesn’t eat. I hear him throwing up. No, I don’t think it’s an eating disorder.”
My stomach roils as I listen to my parents discuss what’s wrong with me. I feel betrayed by Mom, which is unfair to her. I can’t stop the feeling, however.
“Yes, I’ll let you know if the symptoms worsen.” She lowers her voice. “The girls miss you, but I don’t, Garrett. No matter what you say, it’s over. It has been since you slept with Serena.”
What?
“Goodbye, Garrett. We’re done talking tonight. I’m hanging up now. Bye, Garrett.” She lets out an annoyed sigh and then tosses her cell phone loudly on the table.
I stand and walk into the living room. Mom seems tired. As soon as she sees me, she brightens.
“Hey, honey. Feeling better?” She beams her fake ass smile at me.
“Yeah. You want to report back to Dad now?”
Her smile falters. “You heard.”
“Who the hell is Serena, Mom?”
“Come here,” she says, patting the sofa beside her.
I shake my head. “Just tell me.”
“Please, honey.”
With a frustrated sigh, I stalk over to her and plop down. She takes my clammy hand, kissing the back of it like she used to when I was small.
“Serena is a barista.”
“Dad slept with a Starbucks chick?” I ask in disbelief. “When?”
“Apparently often last year.” She sighs heavily. “I found out about it last summer. It came out when we were vacationing in Barbados. I’d picked up his phone and seen a text from her.”
I remember our last family vacation. I’d been so obsessed with Lucas that I wasn’t paying much attention to my parents. Dad seemed to be groveling. Mom was cold and standoffish. I’d thought they were just bickering.
“He said he’d break it off. He did,” she tells me. “He’d already broken us, though. I closed my heart off to him. He’s gone so much with work, the trust couldn’t be repaired. I worried about every female he came in contact with. It was headed for divorce and then…”
“And then I conveniently gave you an out,” I snarl, jerking my hand out of hers.
“No,” she says fiercely. “Your dad lost his damn mind and I did what I had to do to protect you. Our prior relationship had no bearing on the way he was treating my son.”
A strangled cry escapes me. “Mom, you let me think I was the reason you left him.”
“What was I supposed to tell you, Hollis?” she asks tearfully. “Oh, I know your father just broke your spirit and your heart, but let me also tell you what a shitty husband he was to me by sleeping with some college coffee girl.” She swipes a rogue tear from my cheek. “Honey, you were hurting, and I couldn’t add to it. It was all too much. I just had to get you and the girls away from him. He was spiraling and I didn’t want you all to get hurt anymore.”
“You should have told me,” I accuse, hating how pained my voice is.
“You’re right. I should have. I’m sorry.” She pulls me to her, and I go. I let my mom hug away the pain inside me. “I tried to protect you and it didn’t work. You’re hurting and you’re sick and there’s nothing I can do to fix that.” She kisses my hair. “I love you, baby, and you know that.”
I do.
I just need…
“We’re going to walk home,” Roan says from the stairway.
I look over my shoulder to see him and Roux standing there. They both wear guilty expressions like they overheard our conversation.
“I’ll take you home,” I grit out, rising to my feet. “I think I’m going to stay the night, Mom. I need some space right now.”
She nods and stands, giving me a sad look. Then, to Roan she says, “Please take care of him.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
It’s been over a week since my blowout with Mom. Roan and I are both on edge for different reasons. He’s waiting for the shoe to drop with his mom. I’m worried my dad is going to show up at any moment.
“I got an A on our algebra test,” Roan says, grinning at me as we leave the school and head toward my Mustang.
“Seriously?” I nudge him with my shoulder. “I guess we’ll be celebrating tonight.”
His smile widens. “Someone looks like he wants to suck dick when we get to my place.”
“I was thinking in the ’Stang,” I say, waggling my brows. “While you drive us home.”
I toss him the keys and he catches them, laughing. We’re so focused on one another that we almost miss the squeal of tires. I’m suddenly shoved behind Roan.
“Stay back,” he warns.
A piece of shit Maxima rolls to a stop and some big, scary thug looking dude jumps out. He charges right for Roan, swinging at him. The guy misses him the first time, but his knuckles crack against Roan’s face, making his head swing back. It takes a second for me to leap into action. I jump on the dude’s back, putting his thick neck in a headlock. I’m able to distract him enough he focuses on me and not Roan. We fall back and his weight just about knocks the air out of me. He shakes me off and is back on his feet. Roan’s ready for him and punches him hard in the gut.
“What the fuck are you doing here, Alejandro?” Roan demands, dodging another hit.
Oh shit.
The dude who put a gun to Roan’s head.
This guy is dangerous.
“I’ve come to kick your ass,” Alejandro roars, throwing punch after punch at Roan. Several hit him, sending a dazed Roan falling back.
Alejandro reaches for the back of his pants when Roan hits the pavement on his ass. I don’t wait, I tackle this motherfucker again. His gun falls out of his pocket, clattering to the ground. He punches me hard in the stomach, making everything turn black. I’m yanked off him, but it’s by Roan. He’s protecting me.
I hear guys yelling. The Hoodlums. They’re charging for us like fucking gladiators with Jordy leading the charge.
“Fuck,” Alejandro grunts. He scrambles up and runs to his car. In seconds, he peels out and hauls ass out of the parking lot.
<
br /> “Get him,” Jordy yells to Cal and Terrence.
Those two bolt for Cal’s truck and tear out of the lot after him. I turn in Roan’s arms and hug him tight. Our hearts are pounding hard in our chests in tandem. He squeezes me until I can barely breathe.
“What the hell happened, man?” Jordy demands, pacing beside us like an angry bull.
“I don’t know,” Roan grumbles. “Just showed up and stared beating the shit out of me.” He pulls away and takes my face in his hands. “I told you to stay back.”
“And let you get your ass beat all by yourself?” I volley back. “Fat chance.”
“Dumbass,” he mutters not unkindly. His lips press to mine. “That was so stupid, but kind of hot too.”
“Seriously, man? I’m right here,” Jordy grunts.
“It was hot?” I ask, astonished.
“Seeing you try to beat that thug’s ass to defend me. Hell yeah.”
We kiss, uncaring that we have Jordy as an audience. He mutters about us being freaks, but that’s the extent of his displeasure.
“Oh, look,” Jordy says, “the fucker left me a present.”
I pull away from Roan to look at Jordy. He holds Alejandro’s gun in the palm of his hand.
“Maybe we should go to the river and dump it,” I suggest. “You’re great at tossing things into the river.”
Jordy snorts. “Careful, rat. You keep that smartass attitude up and I might actually start to like you.”
Roan winks at me.
Holy shit.
I think I just somehow earned points with my boyfriend’s psycho best friend who tried to kill me.
Roan
“He’s so hot,” Roux says loudly on her phone, talking to Charlotte. “So hot. Oh my God, I think I’m going to die.”
Girls.
They’re so annoying sometimes.
As she babbles about Kayden—because that’s all she talks about—I try to decipher Jordy’s instructions he texted to me on how to make his “real” tacos. I’m not even sure if I bought all the right ingredients. My phone buzzes and it’s from the asshole himself.