by E M Lindsey
“Yes,” Will said, holding her tight, “because he’s a good person.” Better than Joe, who had done nothing but prove everyone else right. Will’s stomach twisted, feeling foolish and humiliated that he’d ever given Joe the benefit of the doubt. The man had spent years being nothing but terrible, and Will had been so weak, he’d given him another chance. Bile rose into the back of his throat, bitter and acidic. “I’m so sorry I let him stick around for so long, Molly.”
She sniffed, nodding against his shoulder. “He makes you sad. Sage makes you happy, but Joe is so mean to you, and I don’t like him.”
“I know, and I promise he’s not coming around ever again,” he said fiercely. He held her back away from him and met her gaze. “You’re the most important thing in the world to me, and I swear I’ll never let anyone like him around again. Okay?”
She studied his face a minute, then nodded. “Okay.”
Feeling a slight bit of relief, he squeezed her once more. “Go get your stuff ready and we can head out.”
Molly nodded, then slipped out of his arms and rushed off to her room. The moment she was out of sight, Will backed up and sagged down onto the sofa, willing himself to keep it together. His throat burned with unshed tears, and he wanted nothing more than to let himself fall apart. He had to be strong for Molly though, had to push it all down.
He felt a rush of anger toward his parents for their deaths, for not being here to take over so his mistakes couldn’t hurt this child. It was irrational and petulant, and mostly borne from the guilt he felt because he’d been so stupid for so long that he’d put Molly at risk. But he didn’t have time to wallow. He collected himself, then finally pulled up Sage’s name in his contacts. The number was unblocked, but there hadn’t been a response to the text Will had sent earlier.
He hit call and waited. And waited.
“Hi, this is Sage, please leave a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. If this is regarding an appointment at Irons and Works, please leave your first and last name, and the time and date of your appointment. Thank you.”
Will squeezed the phone in his hand tightly, then released it. They had to get out of there, and he really didn’t have anywhere else to go. He could call one of his employees, and he knew full well they’d happily step in, but he didn’t want to look weak in front of them.
“You know where to find me if you need anything.” The words echoed in his head, and he knew they’d been for Molly, but Sage had never turned him away, either. Sage had made more than one promise to be there for Will if he ever needed it, and tonight was that night.
That decided, he opened his app to order a ride, and saw it was four minutes away. “Molly,” he called, “it’s time to go.”
She appeared a moment later, her little backpack stuffed to the brim and only just zipped. She had her thumb nail in her mouth, but she pulled her hand away as Will shoved his feet into his shoes. “Is Sage here?”
“No, sweetheart, he can’t come get us. We’re going to get a ride.” He had no idea what he’d do if Sage wasn’t home, but he had to try.
“Are we going to his house?” she asked, fear blossoming in her eyes. “Where it’s safe?”
Will looked at her a long time, then gave a slow nod and brushed his hand down the back of her hair. “Yeah, Molly. We’re going where it’s safe.”
His music was soft in the background, a gentle thrum of heavy drums and strings. He felt better once he’d been able to get away from it all, the noise of the restaurant threatening to choke him, and he only felt like he could breathe again once his apartment door closed.
He hadn’t turned his phone off, and the buzzing of calls and texts told him his departure hadn’t gone unnoticed, but he didn’t care right then. He had to work through this on his own. Lying on the sofa, his head tipped upside down, his gaze wandering to his favorite photo which sat right in the middle of his largest bookshelf. It was the first vacation he and Teddy had ever taken. A road trip to Carlsbad. Teddy had booked a campsite right on the beach, and they arrived with nothing more than a tent, a couple sleeping bags, enough cash for food and gas, and a cooler full of beer.
Sage’s phone broke on the first day, so he found a little seaside vendor with disposable cameras and bought six. Only one photo turned out from all six rolls, and it was a blurry shot of him and Ted standing in front of the high tide, taken by a kindly old man who’d been walking his dog.
He didn’t remember the conversation with the old man, or what the dog looked like, or why Teddy looked like he was laughing. But he did remember being happy. He remembered looking out over the ocean as the sun dipped low on the horizon and telling Teddy, “I think if forever was an emotion, it would be the one I’m feeling right now.”
Normally, Teddy would have mocked him mercilessly for trying to be poetic, but not that time. That time, he simply leaned in, pressed his calloused palm to Sage’s cheek, and kissed him. “I love you,” he probably said. Or maybe je t’aime, because he knew how much Sage like hearing him speak French even though Sage never learned more than a few handfuls of phrases over the years.
He closed his eyes against the onslaught of memories, letting the pain ground him. “I miss you,” he muttered. His eyes prickled with tears, and it startled him, but only because they weren’t for Teddy. They were for himself. “I wish you hadn’t gotten sick. I wish we had known what would happen when you got admitted into the hospital. I would have told you I love you more while you could still hear me, and definitely would have asked you what the hell I was supposed to do after you were gone. I’m just so angry that you’re not with me right now. And I’m angry at myself because I didn’t have to fuck all this up, and yet here I am.”
Teddy didn’t have an answer for him, because he was dead. There was only piercing silence and the utter absence of the man who had long since passed from the world.
These were times Sage desperately wished he believed in some sort of life after death, because the feeling of someone being just gone was too gut-wrenching to bear. “We were supposed to be forever, you know. Meeting you was supposed to save me from my own awkward inability to relate to people. But you left me. Then I went and started falling in love with Will, and like a jack-ass, I panicked.” He pushed himself to sit up, reaching for the photo and holding it so tight his fingers hurt. “I did it with you too, but you were too stubborn to let me torpedo the relationship. I can’t expect everyone to be like you. I need to be the strong one sometimes. I just don’t know how. I just don’t know…”
His monologue was interrupted by the sound of someone knocking. He almost ignored it, not wanting to see anyone, but there was a small tingle in his gut that told him he couldn’t hide anymore. It was likely Mat or even Niko, and he owed them something of an explanation after taking off from his own celebration dinner.
With a sigh, he put the photo back and trudged to the door. He let himself have a moment to breathe, then flung it open, taking an immediate step back in surprise. Of all the people in the world he expected to be there, Will wasn’t one of them. He looked wrecked, Molly sleeping on his shoulder, her over-stuffed backpack hooked over his wrist.
Will’s jaw worked, then he cleared his throat and asked softly, “Can we come in?”
Sage felt immediate panic. Obviously, something had happened, and that something probably started and ended with Joe. His gaze raked over Will’s body, desperately searching for evidence that he was hurt, but he didn’t find anything apart from old tear tracks.
“What happened?” he asked once the door was shut and locked behind them.
Will hesitated. “Long story. Do you have somewhere I can lay her down? She’s exhausted.”
Sage glanced at his watch and realized it was almost eleven. “Oh god, yeah. Here, you can put her in my room.” He hurried to the door and flung it open, showing Will to his unmade bed.
Molly stirred a little as her brother got her situated under the covers, but she didn’t wake, and both men let ou
t a sigh of relief. When it was certain she was going to stay asleep, Will straightened back up and looked at Sage.
“Sorry to drop in on you like this,” he murmured.
Sage shook his head as he beckoned him back to the living room. “You know I said any time, and I meant it.” He paused for a beat, then asked, “Are you going to tell me what happened?”
Will nodded, dragging a hand down his face as he perched on the edge of a sofa cushion. “I’m sure you guessed it, but…Joe happened.” He licked his lips, then glanced toward the kitchen. “Do you have something to drink? Like really hard liquor?”
Sage sank down next to him. “Do you really want that?”
“I feel like it’ll make it easier to talk about,” Will admitted.
Sage shook his head. “It won’t. I promise, it won’t, and you’ll regret compromising something that important to you when it’s all over.” When he saw how hard Will’s hands were shaking, he reached for him, closing his own larger ones around them. “Talk to me.”
Will let out a trembling breath, rolling his eyes to look up at the ceiling, his shoulders hunched high near his ears before he let them drop. “After we got home tonight, I checked my phone, and I found out your number was blocked.”
Sage’s hands spasmed over Will’s, and he quickly pulled them away. “Okay,” he said slowly.
“It was Joe. I don’t know when, but he got into my phone sometime this week and set up the block.” Will pinched the bridge of his nose, squeezing his eyes shut. “He got uh…he got aggressive with me, slammed me against the patio door, held his fist up like he was going to punch me. I don’t know how far he would have gone, but Molly woke up, so he took my car and ran off.”
Sage felt his entire body go so tense he thought he would snap a tendon, and he had to force himself to relax. Flying off the handle and hunting Joe down wouldn’t help Will’s case, and the last thing Sage wanted to do was make it worse. “You need to report your car stolen.”
“I know,” Will said. “I just…I needed to get out of there first, needed to get Molly somewhere safe.”
“Well, you’re here now,” Sage told him. “Molly’s safe in my room, and he’s not brave enough to show his face here.”
“No, but,” he started, then stopped and bit his lip.
“But what?” Sage pressed.
“But he made some…he implied,” Will stuttered to a stop, his expression mortified. “He made a comment about your relationship with Molly being uh…inappropriate.”
Sage felt his entire body go numb from shock. When he came to, he’d shifted a foot away from Will, his hands balled into fists. “He what?”
“No one would ever think that was true, but Joe’s also a vindictive person. I’m going to call her case-worker and warn her about what’s going on. I…” Will swallowed thickly, his voice coming out a bare whisper. “I’m scared. I’m scared they’re going to take her from me because I was an idiot and I couldn’t see the kind of person he was. What if he’s been hurting her? Threatening her? What kind of guardian am I if I let a monster like that near her and…”
“Hey,” Sage said, coming back to himself. He reached out, pulling Will close, setting both hands on the sides of his neck. “People make mistakes. Molly would have told you—she would have told her therapist—if Joe was trying to hurt her, okay? She’s not the kind of girl who would hide something like that. You should absolutely make the call, and you need to tell the police about your car. And report what he did to you. Molly witnessed it, right?”
Will nodded, looking miserable. “Yeah. Yeah, she did.”
“That’s domestic violence. You don’t have to press charges, but he doesn’t have the right to put his hands on you,” Sage told him.
“I can’t go home,” Will said after a beat. “I…he’s got a key. He can get into my building.”
“You’re not going home,” Sage told him firmly. “You call her case-worker, and you tell her the two of you are fine here with me until you have an order of protection and until that asshole is in jail.”
Will gave a determined nod, standing up and dislodging Sage’s grip on him. He looked terrified, but also like this time, he wasn’t going to back off. “Can I take this outside?”
Sage led him to the kitchen and through the little back door that opened to his small, fenced yard. “My neighbor is off in Italy for the next six months, so no one’s listening,” he told him. He reached out, hesitating until Will stepped into his grasp, and Sage couldn’t stop himself from pulling the other man into a warm embrace. His lips smudged along his temple, then down his cheek. “It’s going to be fine. I told you I’d always be here, and I meant it.”
“Thank you,” Will whispered.
Sage held him another moment before pulling away and heading back inside. When the door shut, he forced himself back to the living room so Will could have his privacy, but the not knowing what was coming next was killing him. He tried not to think about what Joe threatened, what he’d implied about Sage. He knew the man was just trying to hit where it hurt, but something like that gutted him.
Before he could get too worked up, he heard a small voice call his name and he turned his head to see Molly standing in the doorway of the room. She was rubbing one eye with her fist, the fingers of her other hand curled around the end of her braid.
“Hey, sweetpea,” he said, standing up. “You okay?”
“Where’s Will?” she asked. Her bare feet shuffled across the floor and Sage scooped her up into his arms.
“He’s outside on the phone taking care of some stuff,” Sage told her. “Do you want to go back to bed, or watch a movie?”
“Do you gots Disney movies?” she asked through a yawn.
He chuckled. “I have Netflix, and I’m sure we can find something.” He tried to settle her off to the side, but she clung to him tight and he had a feeling she was more shaken up from what she’d seen than she was letting on. Pulling down the worn afghan, he tucked it around her and used the remote to find something.
She settled on Princess and the Frog, and he turned the volume low as she settled against him, her head resting on his chest. Her breathing started to even, and just when he thought she’d drifted back asleep again, she looked up at him with her wide eyes. “Is Joe gonna go to jail?”
“I don’t know,” he answered honestly. “He did some pretty bad stuff tonight.”
She nodded, gnawing on her thumb nail. “He hurt Will. I saw him push Will into the door and he…and I thought he was gonna hit him.”
Sage squeezed his eyes shut a minute and willed himself to stay calm. “Did he ever hurt you like that?”
Molly shook her head. “He didn’t like me, but he didn’t hurt me. He was just…not so nice.” She punctuated her statement with a loud yawn, and Sage brushed a hand down her back.
“Well, you won’t have to see him again, okay?” Sage vowed.
“Promise?” she asked.
“Promise,” he repeated, and he meant it. With every fiber of his being, he meant it. Whatever he had to do to keep Molly and Will safe, he’d do it.
Chapter Twenty-One
Will spotted Sage and Molly across the grassy patch of field. Sage was lounging on the bench, his eyes covered by a pair of aviators, thick arms crossed over his chest, legs out in front of him. He was the picture of relaxed and nonchalant, but Will knew better. He knew that for the last two nights, Sage had been on high alert any time they’d left his apartment.
Will had just been given confirmation that Joe was officially behind bars, bail set but not posted, and charges against him were pending for the assault, car-theft, and endangering a minor. It was a small relief, but Will couldn’t let his guard down, even if Joe couldn’t get to them. He’d be out eventually—he had friends around town and some in Denver. It was likely someone would loan him the cash, and Will knew perfectly well a piece of paper wouldn’t protect him and Molly.
Technically, it was safe to return to his place, but Sage
hadn’t mentioned it and Will wasn’t in a hurry to bring it up. He and Molly slept in Sage’s second room, and the three of them had spent most of their time together when Will wasn’t at the café, and Sage wasn’t seeing clients.
Molly was back at school, happier than Will had seen her in a while, and he knew then all the signs he’d been ignoring. He wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to move past that guilt.
“Hey,” Sage said as Will took a seat on the bench next to him. “That took a while.”
Will nodded, giving him an apologetic grin even as he leaned down to steal a drink of Sage’s iced coffee. The taste was a little burnt and too sweet, and his eyes widened when he saw the coffee cart logo on the side. “Betrayal!”
Sage laughed, stealing the cup back. “Listen, there was like fifteen people in line at Masala and Molly was getting restless. You know yours is the only coffee for me, babe.”
Will flushed at the easy nickname, knowing it was in jest, but he couldn’t help imagining Sage calling him that every day. He was profoundly aware of how much he still wanted Sage, but he wasn’t sure where they stood now. Not after everything, and Will knew he needed some space to figure things out.
“Do you want to head back soon? Molly needs to work on homework, and I figured I could cook while you help her out,” Will offered.
Sage nodded, smiling like it was the simplest thing in the world, the most normal. “Hey kiddo, ready to head home?”
Home. Will felt a pain deep down inside him, but he pushed it aside. Don’t get used to this, he cautioned his aching heart. This isn’t for you.
When they got back to Sage’s, Molly sat on the floor in front of the coffee table and she and Sage went over her math lesson while Will prepared some chicken with rice. He lost himself in the rhythm of cooking—not really great at it, but not the worst. He liked the mindless routine of it though, letting his hands move through muscle memory as his thoughts settled.