The Postmaster
For his first job, the postmaster came to the village of Ulapur. It was a very humble village. There was an indigo-factory near by, and the British manager had with much effort established a new post office.
The postmaster was a Calcutta boy – he was a fish out of water in a village like this. His office was in a dark thatched hut; there was a pond next to it, scummed over with weeds, and jungle all around. The indigo agents and employees had hardly any spare time, and were not suitable company for an educated man. Or rather, his Calcutta background made him a bad mixer – in an unfamiliar place he was either arrogant or ill-at-ease. So there was not much contact between him and the residents in the area.
But he had very little work to do. Sometimes he tried to write poems. The bliss of spending one’s life watching the leaves trembling in the trees or the clouds in the sky – that was what the poems expressed. God knew, however, that if a genie out of an Arab tale had come and cut down all the leafy trees overnight, made a road, and blocked out the sky with rows of tall buildings, this half-dead, well-bred young man would have come alive again.
The postmaster’s salary was meagre. He had to cook for himself, and an orphaned village-girl did housework for him in return for a little food. Her name was Ratan, and she was about twelve or thirteen. It seemed unlikely that she would get married. In the evenings, when smoke curled up from the village cowsheds, crickets grated in the bushes, a band of intoxicated Baul singers in a far village sang raucously to drums and cymbals, and even a poet if seated alone on a dark verandah might have shuddered a little at the trembling leaves, the postmaster would go inside, light a dim lamp in a corner of the room and call for Ratan. Ratan would be waiting at the door for this, but she did not come at the first call – she would call back, ‘What is it, Dadababu, what do you want?’
‘What are you doing?’ the postmaster would say.
‘I must go and light the kitchen fire –’
‘You can do your kitchen work later. Get my hookah ready for me.’
Soon Ratan came in, puffing out her cheeks as she blew on the bowl of the hookah. Taking it from her, the postmaster would say abruptly, ‘So, Ratan, do you remember your mother?’ She had lots to tell him: some things she remembered, others she did not. Her father loved her more than her mother did – she remembered him a little. He used to come home in the evening after working hard all day, and one or two evenings were clearly etched in her memory. As she talked, Ratan edged nearer to the postmaster, and would end up sitting on the ground at his feet. She remembered her little brother: one distant day, during the rainy season, they had stood on the edge of a small pond and played at catching fish with sticks broken off trees – this memory was far more vividly fixed in her mind than many more important things. Sometimes these conversations went on late into the night, and the postmaster then felt too sleepy to cook. There would be some vegetable curry left over from midday, and Ratan would quickly light the fire and cook some chapati: they made their supper out of that.
Occasionally, sitting on a low wooden office-stool in a corner of his large hut, the postmaster would speak of his family – his younger brother, mother and elder sister – all those for whom his heart ached, alone and exiled as he was. He told this illiterate young girl things which were often in his mind but which he would never have dreamt of divulging to the indigo employees – and it seemed quite natural to do so. Eventually Ratan referred to the postmaster’s family – his mother, sister and brother – as if they were her own. She even formed affectionate imaginary pictures of them in her mind.
It was a fine afternoon in the rainy season. The breeze was softly warm; there was a smell of sunshine on wet grass and leaves. Earth’s breath – hot with fatigue – seemed to brush against the skin. A persistent bird cried out monotonously somewhere, making repeated and pathetic appeals at Nature’s midday durbar. The postmaster had hardly any work: truly the only things to look at were the smooth, shiny, rain-washed leaves quivering, the layers of sun-whitened, broken-up clouds left over from the rain. He watched, and felt how it would be to have a close companion here, a human object for the heart’s most intimate affections. Gradually it seemed that the bird was saying precisely this, again and again; that in the afternoon shade and solitude the same meaning was in the rustle of the leaves. Few would believe or imagine that a poorly paid sub-postmaster in a small village could have such feelings in the deep, idle stillness of the afternoon.
Sighing heavily, the postmaster called for Ratan. Ratan was at that moment stretched out under a guava tree, eating unripe guavas. At the sound of her master’s call she got up at once and ran to him.
‘Yes, Dadababu, you called?’ she said, breathlessly.
‘I’m going to teach you to read, a little bit each day,’ said the postmaster. He taught her daily at midday from then on, starting with the vowels but quickly progressing to the consonants and conjuncts.
During the month of Srābaṇ, the rain was continuous. Ditches, pits and channels filled to overflowing with water. The croaking of frogs and the patter of rain went on day and night. It was virtually impossible to get about on foot – one had to go to market by boat. One day it rained torrentially from dawn. The postmaster’s pupil waited for a long time at the door, but when the usual call failed to come, she quietly entered the room, with her bundle of books. She saw the postmaster lying on his bed: thinking that he was resting, she began to tip-toe out again. Suddenly she heard him call her. She turned round and quickly went up to him saying, ‘Weren’t you asleep, Dadababu?’
‘I don’t feel well,’ said the postmaster painfully. ‘Have a look – feel my forehead.’
He felt in need of comfort, ill and miserable as he was, in this isolated place, the rain pouring down. He remembered the touch on his forehead of soft hands, conch-shell bangles. He wished his mother or sister were sitting here next to him, soothing his illness and loneliness with feminine tenderness. And his longings did not stay unfulfilled. The young girl Ratan was a young girl no longer. From that moment on she took on the role of a mother, calling the doctor, giving him pills at the right time, staying awake at his bedside all night long, cooking him convalescent meals, and saying a hundred times, ‘Are you feeling a bit better, Dadababu?’
Many days later, the postmaster got up from his bed, thin and weak. He had decided that enough was enough: somehow he would have to leave. He wrote at once to his head office in Calcutta, applying for a transfer because of the unhealthiness of the place.
Released from nursing the postmaster, Ratan once again took up her normal place outside his door. But his call did not come for her as before. Sometimes she would peep in and see the postmaster sitting distractedly on his stool or lying on his bed. While she sat expecting his summons, he was anxiously awaiting a reply to his application. She sat outside the door going over her old lessons numerous times. She was terrified that if he suddenly summoned her again one day, the conjunct consonants would all be muddled up in her mind. Eventually, after several weeks, his call came again one evening. With eager heart, Ratan rushed into the room. ‘Did you call, Dadababu?’ she asked.
‘I’m leaving tomorrow, Ratan,’ said the postmaster.
‘Where are you going, Dadababu?’
‘I’m going home.’
‘When are you coming back?’
‘I shan’t come back again.’
Ratan did not question him further. The postmaster himself told her that he had applied for a transfer, but his application had been rejected; so he was resigning from his post and returning home. For several minutes, neither of them spoke. The lamp flickered weakly; through a hole in the crumbling thatched roof, rain-water steadily dripped on to an earthenware dish. Ratan then went slowly out to the kitchen to make some chapati. She made them with none of her usual energy. No doubt her thoughts distracted her. When the postmaster had had his meal, she suddenly asked, ‘Dadababu, will you take me home with you?’
‘How could I do
that!’ said the postmaster, laughing. He saw no need to explain to the girl why the idea was impossible.
All night long, whether dreaming or awake, Ratan felt the postmaster’s laugh ringing in her ears. ‘How could I do that!’
When he rose at dawn, the postmaster saw that his bath-water had been put out ready for him (he bathed according to his Calcutta habit, in water brought in a bucket). Ratan had not been able to bring herself to ask him what time he would be leaving; she had carried the bath-water up from the river late at night, in case he needed it early in the morning. As soon as he finished his bath, the postmaster called her. She entered the room softly and looked at him once without speaking, ready for her orders. ‘Ratan,’ he said, ‘I’ll tell the man who replaces me that he should look after you as I have; you mustn’t worry just because I’m going.’
No doubt this remark was inspired by kind and generous feelings, but who can fathom the feelings of a woman? Ratan had meekly suffered many scoldings from her master, but these kindly words were more than she could bear. The passion in her heart exploded, and she cried, ‘No, no, you mustn’t say anything to anyone – I don’t want to stay here.’ The postmaster was taken aback: he had never seen Ratan behave like that before.
A new postmaster came. After handing over his charge to him, the resigning postmaster got ready to leave. Before going, he called Ratan and said, ‘Ratan, I’ve never been able to pay you anything. Today before I go I want to give you something, to last you for a few days.’ Except for the little that he needed for the journey, he took out all the salary that was in his pocket. But Ratan sank to the ground and clung to his feet, saying, ‘I beg you, Dadababu, I beg you – don’t give me any money. Please, no one need bother about me.’ Then she fled, running.
The departing postmaster sighed, picked up his carpet-bag, put his umbrella over his shoulder, and, with a coolie carrying his blue-and-white-striped tin trunk on his head, slowly made his way towards the boat.
When he was on the boat and it had set sail, when the swollen flood-waters of the river started to heave like the Earth’s brimming tears, the postmaster felt a huge anguish: the image of a simple young village-girl’s grief-stricken face seemed to speak a great inarticulate universal sorrow. He felt a sharp desire to go back: should he not fetch that orphaned girl, whom the world had abandoned? But the wind was filling the sails by then, the swollen river was flowing fiercely, the village had been left behind, the riverside burning-ground was in view. Detached by the current of the river, he reflected philosophically that in life there are many separations, many deaths. What point was there in going back? Who belonged to whom in this world?
But Ratan had no such philosophy to console her. All she could do was wander near the post office, weeping copiously. Maybe a faint hope lingered in her mind that Dadababu might return; and this was enough to tie her to the spot, prevent her from going far. O poor, unthinking human heart! Error will not go away, logic and reason are slow to penetrate. We cling with both arms to false hope, refusing to believe the weightiest proofs against it, embracing it with all our strength. In the end it escapes, ripping our veins and draining our heart’s blood; until, regaining consciousness, we rush to fall into snares of delusion all over again.
Profit and Loss1
When a daughter was born, after five sons, her parents dotingly named her Nirupama. 2 Such a high-flown name had never been heard in the family before. Usually names of gods and goddesses were used – Ganesh, Kartik, Parvati and so on.
The question of Nirupama’s marriage now arose. Her father Ramsundar Mitra searched and searched without finding a groom he really liked; but in the end he procured the only son of a grand Raybahadur. The ancestral wealth of this Raybahadur had diminished considerably, but the family was certainly noble. They asked for a dowry of 10,000 rupees, and many additional gifts. Ramsundar agreed without a thought – such a groom should not be allowed to slip through one’s fingers. But no way could he raise all the money. Even after pawning, selling, and using every method he could, he still owed 6,000 or 7,000 rupees; and the day of the wedding was drawing near.
The wedding-day came. Someone had agreed to lend the rest of the money at an extortionate rate of interest, but he failed to turn up on the day. A furious scene broke out in the marriage-room. Ramsundar fell on his knees before the Raybahadur, implored him not to bring bad luck by breaking off the ceremony, insisted he would pay him in full. ‘If you can’t hand the money to me, now,’ replied the Raybahadur, ‘the bridegroom will not be brought here.’
The women of the house wept and wailed at this disastrous upset. The root cause of it sat mutely in her silk wedding-dress and ornaments, her forehead decorated with sandal-paste. It cannot be said that she felt much love or respect for her prospective husband’s family.
Suddenly the impasse was resolved. The groom rebelled against his father, saying firmly, ‘This haggling and bartering means nothing to me. I came here to marry, and marry I shall.’
‘You see, sir, how young men behave these days,’ said his father to everyone he turned to.
‘It’s because they have no training in morality or the Shastras,’ said some of the oldest there. The Raybahadur sat despondent at seeing the poisonous fruits of modern education in his own son. The marriage was completed in a gloomy, joyless sort of way.
As Nirupama left for her in-laws’ house her father clasped her to his breast and could not hold back his tears. ‘Won’t they let me come and visit you, father?’ she asked. ‘Why shouldn’t they, my love?’ said Ramsundar. ‘I’ll come and fetch you.’
Ramsundar often went to see his daughter, but he had no honour in his son-in-law’s house. Even the servants looked down on him. Sometimes he saw his daughter for five minutes in a separate outer room of the house; sometimes he was not allowed to see her at all. To be disgraced so in a kinsman’s house was unbearable. He decided that somehow or other the money would have to be paid, but the burden of debt on his shoulders was already hard to control. Expenses dragged at him terribly; he had to resort to all sorts of petty subterfuges to avoid running into his creditors.
Meanwhile his daughter was treated spitefully at every turn. She shut herself into her room and wept – a daily penance for the insults heaped on her family. Her mother-in-law’s assaults were especially vicious. If anyone said, ‘How pretty the girl is – it’s a pleasure to look at her,’ she would burst out, ‘Pretty indeed! Pretty as the family she came from!’ Even her food and clothing were neglected. If a kind neighbour expressed concern, her mother-in-law would say, ‘She has more than enough,’ – implying that if the girl’s father had paid full price she would have received full care. Everyone treated her as if she had no rights in the household, and had entered it by deceit.
Naturally news of the contempt and shame his daughter was suffering reached Ramsundar. He decided to sell his house. He did not, however, tell his sons that he was making them houseless: he intended to rent the house back after selling it. By this ploy, his sons would not know the true situation till after his death. But his sons found out. They came and protested vigorously. The three elder boys, particularly, were married and probably had children: their objections were so forceful that the sale was stopped. Ramsundar then started to raise money by taking out small loans from various quarters at high interest – so much so, that he could no longer meet household expenses.
Nirupama understood everything from her father’s expression. The old man’s grey hair, pallid face and permanently cowering manner all indicated poverty and worry. When a father lets down his own daughter, he cannot disguise the guilt he feels. Whenever Ramsundar managed to get permission to speak to his daughter for a few moments, it was clear at once even from his smile how heart-broken he was.
She longed to return to her father’s house for a few days to console him. To see his sad face made it awful to be away. One day she said to Ramsundar, ‘Father, take me home for a while.’
‘Very well,’ he replied – but he
had no power to do so, the natural claims that a father has to his daughter had been pawned in place of a dowry. Even a glimpse of his daughter had to be begged for meekly, and if on any occasion it was not granted he was not in a position to ask a second time. But if his daughter herself wished to come home, how could he not bring her?
It is better not to tell the story of the indignity, shame and hurt that Ramsundar had to endure in order to raise the 3,000 rupees that he needed for an approach to his daughter’s father-in-law. Wrapping the banknotes in a handkerchief tied into a corner of his chadar, he went to see him. He began breezily with local news, describing at length a daring theft in Harekrishna’s house. Comparing the abilities and characters of Nabinmadhab and Radhamadhab, he praised Radhamadhab and criticized Nabinmadhab. He gave a hair-raising account of a new illness in town. Finally, putting down the hookah, he said as if in passing, ‘Yes, yes, brother, there’s still some money owing, I know. Every day I remember, and mean to come along with some of it, but then it slips my mind. I’m getting old, my friend.’ At the end of this long preamble, he casually produced the three notes, which were really like three of his ribs. The Raybahadur burst into coarse laughter at the sight of them. ‘Those are no use to me,’ he said, making it plain by using a current proverb that he did not want to make his hands stink for no reason.
After that, to ask to bring Nirupama home seemed out of the question, though Ramsundar wondered what good he was doing to himself by observing polite forms. After sitting in heart-stricken silence for a long time, he did at last softly raise the matter. ‘Not now,’ said the Raybahadur, giving no reason; then he left, to go about his work.
Unable to face his daughter, hands trembling, Ramsundar tied the three banknotes back into the end of his chadar and set off home. He resolved never to return to the Raybahadur’s house until he had paid the money in full; only then could he lay claim to Nirupama confidently.
Selected Short Stories Page 7