***
Alex stood and paced the length of the den. He couldn’t deny what had happened between them when they’d kissed. He’d been in love and in lust before and knew the difference between chemistry and love. There was a vast difference between the two.
He loved Susan, an occurrence he had vowed never to let happen again, but here he was — in love and perturbed with himself for falling for Susan, yet happy that he had.
The fault was hers. If she weren’t so damned cute, if she didn’t have such a quirky sense of humor and wonderful personality, it wouldn’t have happened. This was a complication he hadn’t anticipated.
What about Susan? Was she in love with him? Yes. She didn’t realize it yet, but she was. Her love for him radiated in her eyes.
Like nothing he wanted before, he wanted to marry her, to make her his. But she might not want to marry, not so soon, maybe not ever. She had more to consider than herself. She’d put her children ahead of her own happiness. Her life revolved around them. He understood that.
If they married, he’d center his life around all of them. In time, love for Benjamin and Katie would come. Certainly faster in Benjamin’s case. Katie might take a little extra work.
But that was okay. He enjoyed a challenge.
He already liked Benjamin, and even Katie, though she made it difficult at times. Maybe she’d tow the line with him now since he promised to keep her secret. Secret. How he despised the word. He wouldn’t rat her out, but somehow he’d convince her to tell her mother the truth.
Katie was lucky he walked past that alleyway yesterday when he did. Anger had gotten the best of him when he'd seen that guy sneak his hand inside her sweater. Katie had no experience with boys. The sleaze he'd hauled off her and thrown to the ground was hardly a boy, though. He was at least four years her senior. She hadn't been hurt, but if he hadn't happened along when he had, she might not have been so lucky.
He stopped pacing to stoke the fire, thinking back to his proposal to Naomi. Marriage had been something they'd both wanted, but once he told her his true identity and that he was that little boy, she'd not only broken off their engagement, she'd fled the state.
He'd expected there would be some surprise and that she'd need time to accept his past, but never that reaction. He wouldn't make that mistake again. But would that be a mistake, too? Susan was nothing like Naomi, but Susan could still react to the truth like Naomi had. No, he wouldn't tell Susan his secret. Some things were better left unknown, some things better left untold. Still, though, he found himself at odds with what he knew in his heart — that he should tell Susan the truth.
He leaned the poker against the bricks of the fireplace, then sat in the wingback chair. He stared at the ceiling, cursing the sins of his parents. But he wasn’t like them, certainly not anything like his father. Like father, like son? No, he was not.
Things happen because they were meant to happen. Though he couldn’t understand why what had happened to his family needed to happen. He decided to make good things happen and knew right where to begin.
He grabbed the cordless phone from the desk and punched in the number of his good friend, Ollie Driscoll, the person who everyone called who wanted to know something about someone.
Fifteen minutes later, after a quick shower, he navigated the snow-packed streets toward Greenwood Lane.
Restless Souls Page 28