“Something funny?” George said, smiling in his friendly, open way.
“I saw a fellow lugging a bag of fish up the hill on my way here.” This was a complete fabrication. Elias was guilty of how easily the lie came. “I think I heard him say something about a lady McArkam. That your daughter, is it?”
“LadyMcArkam?” George laughed. “You must’ve heard wrong, lad.”
“Oh,” Elias said. “I thought perhaps it was her husband.”
“Oh, no,” George said quickly. “Lollie don’t have a husband.”
“But the child—”
“Lollie don’t have a husband,” George repeated stiffly. “It’s just the lad, her, and me.”He spoke with the tone of a man who wishes to say no more.
Elias didn’t press him. Lollie didn’t have a husband. Did that mean—No, it was too mad to think of. How old had the child looked? Could he have been just a little over five? Did he have something of the English in his ruddy Scottish features?
Elias left George as quickly as he could and sheltered in the lodgings the villagers had provided for him. He started a fire, and huddled near it. A child, he thought, in astonishment. My child.
*****
She had to see him. She had to make sure that it was really him. No matter that Father had given her his name. Perhaps it was a different Elias Taylor. Perhaps the kelpie was playing a trick on her.
She waited until Father and Freddie were sleeping, and then crept out of the house and sneaked through the village. There was only one place the villagers would’ve housed a visitor. That was in the McGregor house. The McGregor’s had left the village two years ago, and their house stood abandoned. Lollie sneaked through the village, ducking under clotheslines, weaving between houses, until she came to the house. In the bottom window, a candle flickered.
She crept over to it and peered in. And there he was, looking a little older, a little rougher, but no less handsome. His held his hands over the candle, making broken shadows upon the wall, and gazed into the dark, as if under a spell. Lollie could barely believe what she was seeing. Hearing of him was one thing; actually seeing him, after all this time, was something else entirely. She pressed her palm against the window, and peered close. His muscles were tense, like a tough problem was working itself out upon his body.
He sighed, and then leaned back in the chair. He closed his eyes. Soon, he was snoring. Lollie watched him sleep for too long, and the retreated into the night.
When she was back in bed, panic came over her. That was him. There was no denying it. That was Elias Taylor, Freddie’s father. She had never believed in the kelpie, but here it was, workings its magic. It had pushed Elias all the way to Karankay, back into her life. He and Father had talked, and Father didn’t know that he was talking to his grandson’s father. It was a mess: a magical mess.
She curled into a ball and tried to breathe steadily. Feelings warred within her. She didn’t know whether to be ecstatic or terrified. She had dreamt of him returning many times, but she had never, for a moment, thought it might actually happen. In the morning, Father leaned over her.
“You okay?” he said.
“Yeah, Da,” Lollie said.
“You look like you’ve seen a spirit.”
I have, she thought. A spirit the kelpie sent me. A spirit from the past.
“No, Da,” she said. “Just a little tired.”
“Okay, then,” Father said. “I’m off to meet the English mason.”
Lollie lurched to her feet. “Da, can me and Freddie come with you?”
“I don’t see why not.”
Lollie woke Freddie, and then the three of them were walking toward the lighthouse spot, to meet the English mason, to meet the father of Lollie’s child.
*****
Lollie’s legs felt as though they might give way at any moment. Walking was an intolerable struggle when her heart was so full of anticipation and dread. Freddie hopped beside her, happy to be out of the house and in the chill autumn air, happy to be with his ma and papa. Lollie saw him after a moment, standing at the edge of the water, gazing into the distance. His back was turned, but then Father called out to him, and he turned.
His face dropped the moment he saw her. He looked away, at the ground, and color rose in his cheeks. Father patted him on the back. “The weather getting to you, aye?”
Elias managed a nod.
“Aye, alright. This is Lollie, my daughter. And Elias, my grandson.”
Elias held out his hand. Lollie offered hers, and they shook. Energy passed between their hands. Lollie felt a strong urge to hold onto him and never let him go. She wanted to hold onto that hand forever. But Father was there, and she couldn’t arouse suspicion. She withdrew her hand and Elias knelt down.
“Hello, little man,” he said.
Freddie, who had been learning English and his own language since he was a baby, beamed at the English man. “Hello, sir,” he said, in a poor imitation of a gentleman’s voice. “How are you today?”
“Wow!” Elias laughed. “He is quite the linguist!”
Freddie beamed, and Elias ruffled his hair.
Lollie watched in fascination. For the first time in her life, her son and his father were interacting. She wished this moment could stretch forever, but then Father was leading them to the rock where the lighthouse would go, talking about measurements with Elias. Freddie listened in rapt attention, but Lollie could barely take it.
They were about to leave when she touched Elias’ arm. “Shall I tell him, or shall you?” she said.
Father tilted his head. He had no clue what they were talking about. “I will do it,” Elias said, standing up straighter. “George, sir, I have something to tell you. I am sorry I did not do it sooner.”
&
He had expected the man to roar his outrage, or to hit him, or to walk off in stony silence. Instead, he leaned forward, and whispered intently: “Show the boy love, aye? He shouldn’t find out about it like this. Kneel down and show him love. Look at him, aye? He’s wondering what this all means. Your son is scared. Come on, lad.”
Elias looked down at the boy – Freddie – and saw that George was right. He peered up at Elias with open confusion in his little eyes. Elias signed and knelt down. “Freddie,” he said. “I know this is going to sound mighty strange, but I’m your father.”
“My pa?” the boy said in wonderment. “My real pa?”
Elias nodded. “Yes, your real pa.”
A wave of regret washed over him as he regarded the boy. Here was his child, and he had never spoken to him before now. Here was the product of that passionate night, and Elias was a complete stranger to him. The boy’s mouth slowly fell open, and then he reached out and touched Elias’ shoulder. “You’re real,” he said slowly. “You’re really real.”
“I am,” Elias said. “I’m sorry I wasn’t around before, young sir. Do you think we can be friends?”
Elias’ sanity hung on this question. If the boy denied him now, he would fall into a fit of despair. He felt as though he were standing before a king, waiting for his decision on some important matter. And that, he decided, was what he was doing: standing before his son, more important than any king, and waiting to be hated. After a pause, the boy smiled. “We can be friends,” he said. “I’ll show you the rock pools down the shore.”
Without waiting for a reply, Freddie sprinted down shore. He stopped a few feet away, looking over his shoulder. “Are you coming?” he said.
Elias looked to Lollie, who had been watching this scene in rapt fascination. “What do you think?” he said.
Lollie looked to George, who shrugged and nodded at the boy. “Go with your son and his father, Lollie, but only if ye want to.”
Lollie smiled. “I want to, Da.”
“Then go. I’ll not stand in your way.”
Lollie followed her son. Elias was about to follow when George touched his arm. “Be a good man to them, lad.”
“I will, sir,” Elias promis
ed. He was not the sort of man to lie to his lover’s father. “I promise, I will.”
“Aye, I believe you. Go, then.”
Elias ran down the shore with Lollie and Freddie, heading toward the rock pools.
*****
Five weeks later, when the workmen had arrived and the lighthouse was half-built, Lollie peered at herself in the reflection of the water. She looked brighter, more alive; she looked as though the kelpie were living behind her eyes, infusing her with energy. She splashed water on her face, and grinned at herself. After a few moments, Elias knelt down beside her. “You are grinning at yourself,” he remarked.
“I am,” she said. “Does it scare you?”
“Everything about you scares me,” he jested, nudging her playfully. “I am terrified by your very presence.”
Elias often said things like these, thinking that he was joking. But Lollie knew the truth. He wasn’t joking at all. He really was terrified of her and Freddie. He wasn’t so terrified that he would leave them; his terror actually made him more likely to stay. He was terrified because she and he had experienced one night of pure pleasure together, and he had never expected life to spring from it. He was terrified because he had missed six years of family.
“Why did you want to meet all the way out here?” Elias asked. “Is there something wrong?” His voice was tinged with panic. Lollie knew that he lived in the perpetual fear that she would cast him aside, and he would be forced to leave her and Freddie. “Lollie?”
“Nothing is wrong,” she laughed. “I am here to ask something of you, sweet Elias. I have spoken to Miss Colquhoun, the oldest and wisest lady in the village. For a long time she had married the people of Karankay. I have asked her if we may be married, upon Finger Rock. She has agreed. She doesn’t like it, mind you. She says that we should’ve been joined long ago. But she has agreed all the same. I just need to know if you—” Here her words ran out. She had expected him to ask this, but he had been busy with the lighthouse—and bonding with Freddie. Plus, these weren’t his lands. He was still getting used to their customs. She shrugged. “You know.”
He nodded. “I know, Lollie. Why do you look so nervous?” He kissed her upon the forehead. His lips were warm. “I have wandered for six years. I have been as a homeless vagrant, apart from my masonry. And all the while I thought of you, Lollie. Of that magical time upon the rock.I tried to imagine what you were doing, how you were feeling, how live was treating you. Imagine my surprise when I discovered we had a son together! Imagine my surprise when I was welcomed back here!”
He shook his head slowly, as though he could barely believe it. “And imagine my surprise when your father – bless the man – did not treat me as a brute. As he might’ve.As he had every right to.No, instead, he treated me with kindness, and he allowed me to court you.” He reached out and touched her hand. Their finger brushed, and then interlocked. “I will go there with you this moment,” he said. “Yes, Lollie, let us go there!”
Lollie asked him to wait whilst she fetched Miss Colquhoun. The old lady was bone-thin with paper-thin skin and stick-thin arms and legs. Her skin was normally saggy over her face. But today it seemed lighter, tauter. She was smiling; Lollie had never seen her smile. “Aye, a fine day,” the old lady said. “A fine day indeed.” When she saw Elias, she clapped her hands. “Go and get a boat, man!”
Elias grinned as he jumped to his feet. “Yes, Miss,” he laughed, and ran off to get a rowboat.
He returned with Father and Freddie, Elias and Father carrying the boat upon their shoulders. They lowered the boat into the water, and Elias helped Miss Colquhoun in, and then Lollie, and then he climbed in after them.
“Will you be back, Ma?” Freddie said.
“We will,” Elias said, before she could answer. He had gotten more confident in speaking to his son. “We’ll be back before you know it, and we’ll be married.”
“Married.” Freddie said the word like a prayer.
Elias began rowing them toward Finger Rock, where they had met all those years ago, and where their future would be made real.
&
There were still rules about Finger Rock, and Elias was not allowed to actually stand upon the rock. But the ladies of the village, upon hearing of his story, had been surprisingly flexible. They had contrived to create a rule declaring that – in special events – a man may wrap his feet in cloth, and thus stand upon the rock. Elias could not help but smile to himself as he pulled his boots off and wrapped his feet in cloth. The lengths they are going to for mine and Lollie’s happiness, he thought with a smile.
He and Lollie jumped from the boat upon the rock, and then together they helped Miss Colquhoun onto the rock. He limped to the edge, and then turned to face the two of them. “Once you are bound here,” she said, “there is no going back. You will be man and wife in the eyes of the kelpie. Do you trust in the kelpie, Englishman?”
“It brought me to Lollie,” he said. “And it bade me return here after so many years. Yes, I trust it.”
“And you, daughter of the sea, LollieMcArkam, do you trust the kelpie?”
“I do,” Lollie said. “I want to be with this man, in the eyes of the kelpie.”
Lollie, more forward and confident than any lady back home would have been allowed to be, reached out and grasped his hand. Elias gripped her hand and squeezed. He had never been so full of impending contentment in his life. All his life lay before him in one long contented breath. He was looking forward immensely to teaching Freddie how to build rudimentary things from stone. He was looking forward to sharing Lollie’s bed every night. He was looking forward to becoming a family.
Miss Colquhoun leaned over and touched Elias’ head. “You are a child of the kelpie now, and so you must obey its laws. You and this woman are united in the eyes of the kelpie, and you shall never part, even when the kelpie grants you death. In the realms of the crashing waves, you shall entwine eternal.”
Miss Colquhoun then took her hand from Elias and placed in on Lollie’s head. “You, too, are a child of the kelpie.Obey its laws, for you and this man are united in its eyes. Never shall you part; when death takes you to the realms of crashing waves, you shall entwine eternal.”
She brought her hands to her chest and closed her eyes. “The connection is almost made,” he said. “If you would deny it, throw yourself off Finger Rock.”
Elias looked to Lollie, half-afraid that she might do just that. But instead she smiled at him. The two of them stayed silent. The bond was made. They were married.
“We will make that place of yours a home,” Lollie whispered into his ear. “Aye? Make it a lovely home.”
“I’m never going back to England,” Elias said, stroking her hair. “There is nothing left for me there. A ruined name, a lifetime of training to restrict myself in almost every way.You do not realize how lucky you are up here.”
“So we shall make it a home?” Lollie said, kissing his chin.
“We shall,” Elias said. “Yes, me and you and Freddie.”
He smiled.
*****
They obtained permission from the village council to officially move into the McGregor house. Lollie watched with a profound sense of pride and completion as Elias set to work on it. He had housed himself in a room at the back, which was quite sturdy. But the rest of the house was full of holes and instability. Elias, when he was not working on the lighthouse, threw himself into these tasks. He would return from the lighthouse and take Freddie around the house, explaining what he was doing. Freddie had even helped with some minor tasks.
Months passed, and the stone house became a home. A great fire burned in the fireplace, and she lay in Elias’ arms. The lighthouse had been built, and soon Englishman would be here, fishing, mixing. “Won’t you be tempted to go back?” Lollie said. She often asked him this. She couldn’t help it. Their life must’ve seemed simply when compared with England. “Won’t your countryman find your way of life odd?”
Elias laughed,
as he always did. And then he brought her hand to his lips and kissed them tenderly. Freddie slept contently beside the fire, his back to them, rising and falling with his precious breaths. “They will find it strange,” Elias said. “They would find everything about us strange. The way we met, the way I returned here, the marriage ceremony. But I don’t care, my love. I used to think the kelpie was a silly story – as did you, and as will they –but I believe in it now. The kelpie brought me here. It must have. What are the chances of me coming here twice, in such mad circumstances?”
“Low,” Lollie whispered. She smoothed her hand through his hair. Was this a good time? Lollie didn’t know if any time was a good time. She would just have to go for it. “Elias.”
“Hmm?”
“I am with child.”
She didn’t know what to expect. He hadn’t been here when Freddie was growing inside of her. But she needn’t have feared. He jumped to his feet and then pulled him up with her. “You madman!” she cried.
He lifted her off the ground and hugged her tightly to him. “This makes me the happiest man alive,” he said, kissing her over and over, on the neck, on the cheek, on the lips. “Not just the happiest Englishman in Scotland. But the happiest man alive!”
They shared a long kiss. Then they stared at each other, deeply, intensely. They were smiling. Lollie thought the baby in her belly was smiling, too.
Bound by Pleasure
1815.
Dolores Sykes gazed out of the window as her late husband’s nephew approached. Mervin Sykes was here, she knew, to try and rob her of her home, of her security. Mother and Father had married her off to the old man because they’d wanted to secure her future. But they hadn’t counted on the one certainty: that eventually the old man would die. She shivered at the mere thought of Thornton Sykes. He’d been a fat, old, depraved man. She was two-and-twenty. He’d been five-and-sixty. When he’d looked at her, it was like watching a farmer evaluate his livestock. And when he’d taken her to bed . . . She shivered again. And finally, after two years of marriage, he was dead. The fat, old, depraved man had died. Dolores didn’t weep. She had never loved Lord Thornton. Only her parents had, or, at least, they’d loved his income.
The Duke of Ice Page 36