It’s true. I’d show up naked for Emmie’s wedding day if that’s what she wanted, but then again, she’s not vindictive and will most likely want me to look halfway decent. The fact that Gwyn and Mack want me to wear this couch potato costume on their big day says a lot of things about them, and none of them are good.
Sherlock comes sniffing around my midsection. Don’t you have one like this at home? Didn’t Jasper tell you just last week that it was one of his favorite dresses on you?
It’s true on both counts. Not only do I have a wonky dress to call my very own, but Jasper said he loves it because it’s easy to take off. I believe the words he used were easy access, and he wasn’t wrong.
Mackenzie points to my hip. “Sherlock is trying to tell you it has pockets.”
“Oh, women love pockets,” Gwyn is quick to adulate the dress’ one redeemable feature.
“Fine,” I say.
“Fine?” My mother squints my way. If anyone here understands the deeper meaning of the word fine, it’s my mother. She should—she redefined the more esoteric use of the word.
“Yes. Fine.” I double down on the fact I’m resorting to her lexicon. “If that’s what the brides want, that’s what I’ll wear.”
“Oh goodie.” Mackenzie claps my way. “Just wait until you see the hat I’m having made to match.”
“Don’t push your luck,” I tell her just as my sister strides in looking ever so sleek in a black catsuit and a bright pink blazer on over that.
Her lips flicker in my direction, and I can feel the zinger coming.
“Trying on some hot lingerie to regale Jasper with?”
Knew it. Little does she know, she’s not that far off base.
Georgie slaps her hands together. “Wonky lingerie! Bizzy, you come up with the best ideas.”
“Don’t forget about the wonky bridal gowns,” I tell her as I wink at Gwyn and Mackenzie. “You can thank me later.” I head over to my saucy sister while Georgie busies the brides-to-be with swatches for their build-your-own bridal gown adventure.
Macy shakes her head as she sizes me up.
“This is exactly why I said no when the two of them asked me to stand up for them.”
I suck in a quick breath. “They asked you first? You mean I’m second rate?”
“Third,” my mother says. “They asked me, too.” She shrugs. “Come to think of it, they might have asked Georgie, too.”
“Figures.” I glance their way. “But, on the upside”—I shrug—“never mind. I can’t seem to find one.”
Mom rolls her eyes. “Bizzy, it’s your first Valentine’s Day as a married woman. You’re going to have a blast. More importantly, Jasper will. Just try to think about shoes.”
“Mother. Eww.” I’m tempted to swat her, but the sleeves alone on this thing weigh a ton. “And just for the record, I will have a blast, too.”
Georgie scuttles our way with both cats in her arms. “What did I miss?”
Macy forces a short-lived smile. “Bizzy is filling us in on her sex life.”
“So I missed nothing,” Georgie doesn’t miss a beat either.
“Very funny,” I say. “Macy, are you familiar with a man by the name of Tiger Caldwell?”
“No, but with a name like Tiger, I’m pretty sure I should be. Why? Does he owe you money?”
“No, that would be you,” I say. “I’m investigating him.”
A sickly moan emits from our mother. “Please don’t, Bizzy. It’s bad enough I have to worry about the fact you might just run the inn into the ground. The last thing I want to think about is you running around with bad guys with guns.”
Gwyneth calls my mother over, and I’m only mildly relieved.
“Does she really think I’m going to run the inn into the ground?”
Georgie shakes her head. “Everybody does. But never mind the obvious. How are we going to track down this sexy Tiger?”
I make a face at her. “I don’t know.”
Fish yowls as Mackenzie steps into our midst, Don’t let her make another suggestion, Bizzy. She already threatened to turn both Sugar and me into a fur stole.
Sherlock barks at the menacing mayor. Nobody turns my cats into a stole—whatever that is.
“Oh hush.” Mackenzie scowls at him. “It’s bad enough Gwyn and Hux have decided to have you, of all creatures, stand up as the best man. And yes, you’ll be wearing a tux.”
Hear that? Sherlock leaps and barks. I’m going to be in the wedding!
“That’s the best news I’ve heard all day.” I give him a quick scratch on the back. “I always knew we made a good team.” I guess Gwyn couldn’t choose between her four sons. And my father’s only son is actually having a wedding of his own. In the grand scheme of all the wedding chaos, it makes perfect sense. In fact, Sherlock Bones in a tux might just be the crowning jewel of that entire night.
Mackenzie glowers my way. “Now what’s this about Tiger Caldwell?”
“You know him?”
Of course, she does. She’s the mayor. She knows just about everyone. Note to self: Utilize my sister-in-law-to-be as a resource to hunt down future suspects. At least she brings something to the family table. I’ll admit, it takes the edge off our impending familial bond.
“I don’t, but your brother does,” she says. “He introduced me to him the night of the killing.”
“Well then”—Macy sheds a greedy grin my way—“it looks as if we’ll have to speak to our sweet brother to arrange an impromptu meet and greet with my shiny new Valentine. With a name like Tiger, I’m sure I won’t be disappointed.”
Sugar lets out a hearty growl. She’ll be disappointed, all right. Bobbie never had a nice thing to say about Tiger.
My entire body perks to attention as I snatch up Sugar.
“I’d better change,” I say as I whisk her away to the dressing room. “Sugar, tell me everything you know about Tiger Caldwell.”
She lifts her tiny pink nose my way. I don’t know much, but I do know that he came by the Buckinghams’ house more often than not. He liked the cuddler, I think.
“Keegan Merritt?”
She nods. That’s right. And he was always whispering to Chip about something concerning money. They never looked happy.
“What about Bobbie? Were they friends?”
No, not friends, but Bobbie mentioned him once or twice to Lacey. Something about a train.
“A train? Interesting. The mystery surrounding him only deepens. I can’t wait to see what he has to say.”
Diane wasn’t sure what Tiger did for a living, but she seemed to think he was loaded. The day of the killing, Lacey mentioned that she thought he might be a bookie. Right after that, she made it clear internally that she wanted in on that action—with her body, of course. And Keegan was seen having a conversation with him after the murder took place.
But it’s the fact I saw Tiger and Chip going at it before the murder took place that lands him as a suspect on my list.
Tiger Caldwell is shrouded in mystery.
And that’s one mystery I’m determined to solve sooner than later.
I might be wearing a disaster of a dress for Huxley’s wedding, but I’m about to ask him to return the favor in advance.
Let’s hope Tiger Caldwell roars out a confession of murderous proportions. Or in the least, points his paw right at the killer.
Either way, whoever killed Chip Buckingham is destined to end up in a government-issued cage.
Chapter 11
“All aboard!” a man in a retro version of a conductor’s uniform, complete with coat and tails, shouts as he swings from the platform of the goliath steam engine with one hand.
It’s less than six hours after Macy and I shook our brother down to arrange a meeting with Tiger Caldwell, and here we are doing our best impression of the steampunk era with dresses Macy rented for us all—and that includes Georgie, Juni, and Mackenzie as well.
Jasper gives my hand a squeeze. “I’ve got to hand it t
o you, Bizzy. You’re quite the asset to any investigation. I don’t think I could have scored tickets to the hottest club in Bangor.”
“It was all Hux,” I say, slapping my brother on the back.
Not only does Tiger run a successful portfolio management company, but he’s the owner of this steampunk party train and a regular at the party scene himself.
Both Huxley and Jasper are wearing their requisite dark suits along with the top hats Macy rented for them. In fact, most of the men present are sporting coats and tails and odd-looking ties. A few of them even have monocles. But the women are the true showstoppers with their bustles and their endless ruffles. Each of our dresses is made of thick brocade in a rainbow of black, silver, and deep purple. My own dress is a heavenly shade of deep purple that cinches at the waist and flares into a river of fabric that pools by my ankles.
Hux leans my way, a serious demeanor taking over his face. His dark hair is slicked back, and his eyes shine bright as the sky in this dim light.
“Play nice with Tiger. He’s not only my buddy—he manages my portfolio. Don’t tick him off. My fiscal future is in the bounds.”
Mackenzie grunts my way, “Do not screw this up, Baker. I have my eye on a house that overlooks the water, and it’s not exactly free.”
Macy gags. “You’re buying a house together?” She looks to Hux. “So you’re like serious about this whole thing?” she asks, flicking a finger between the two of them.
“Yes.” Huxley’s eyes bug out for a moment. “We’re getting married. This is not a drill.”
“Oh.” Macy’s jaw goes rigid. “So that whole humiliating Bizzy thing is real.” A laugh trembles through her. “Again, I’m thankful I’m not playing the part of maid of honor.”
My brother gives a sold blink to his blushing bride. “Who’s humiliating Bizzy?”
“Never mind,” I say as I spot the man with dark hair and a comely face from the night of the murder. “A tiger just stepped into our midst.”
Tiger Caldwell stands tall in a long coat with tails, a ruffled shirt, and an elongated top hat with a silver ribbon trimming the bottom.
“Last call to all of my fellow revelers,” he shouts at the top of his lungs. “It’s time to step onto the Ironwork Express for a night filled with illusion, delusion, and collusion in a trip that travels both backward and forward in time. Feel free to indulge in bawdy behavior and skullduggery as D.J. Cutthroat rocks the caboose!”
Georgie and Juni lift their frocks enough to keep from tripping. Georgie has donned a navy number with zippers located in places zippers should never be, and Juni is wearing a dress that amounts to a ball gown solely comprised of leather.
Juni eyes the train from over my shoulder. “Wish me luck, ladies. I’m certain my Mr. Right is on that steam engine somewhere.”
“What about the doctor with the Bentley?” Jasper asks.
“Or Bobbie’s brother, Buck?” I add.
Juni averts her eyes. “Everyone knows the third time’s a charm.”
“Good thinking,” Georgie says, linking her arm through her daughter’s. “I’ll let two strangers buy me a drink before I find a man to take me to the dance next week. Here’s hoping he’s wearing a monocle and his real teeth.”
They take off and we step onto the train, only to find Tiger greeting all of the guests at the entry. It’s more spacious than I assumed it would be in here, with a row of seats lining either side and a few tables set out here and there, but more than ample room to have a spontaneous dance floor in the middle.
The thick scent of cologne mingling with perfume lets me know just about everyone here means business, and the sound of laughter is already rising above the light music playing over the speakers.
“Huxley Baker”—Tiger slaps my brother on the shoulder as an enormous grin breaks out over his face—“glad you finally took me up on the offer to swing by.” He nods to Mackenzie. “Nice to see you again, Mayor Woods. You look just as lovely as the night we met.” And as soon as Hux cuts this one loose, I’m hunting her down to make her my own. Or in the least, adding her name to my favorite naughty list.
“Macy Baker.” My sister wastes no time in shaking his hand just as a sharp whistle goes off overhead and the train starts moving with a jerk. “I’m Huxley’s favorite sister as evidenced by the fact I’m allowed to wear whatever I wish to his nuptials next week.”
I glance up at Jasper and shrug because, let’s face it, I can’t dispute a thing she just said.
Jasper cocks his head to the side. Do I want to know what they’re having you wear?
“Let’s just say it’s something you find easy to remove,” I whisper.
“Oh.” He tips his head back and winces. Sorry about that. But on the upside, things should move rather swiftly for us once we get back to the cottage that night.
I nod because it’s so true.
“Well, well”—Tiger’s eyes ride up and down my sister’s body, and I swear I can see him hugging her every curve—“isn’t this a pleasure.” He frowns momentarily at Jasper. “And is this the mister?”
“No, no.” Macy is quick to swat Jasper away as if he had a spider crawling up his arm. “That would Bizzy’s husband. I’m single and looking to mingle.” She hikes a shoulder his way while batting her lashes. “Know of anyone who might want to lose an hour or two with me?”
A dark chuckle fills his throat, and his mind immediately goes to white noise.
And there’s that. Macy has turned his brain to mush. Here’s hoping I can use it to my advantage.
But before I can properly introduce myself and deep dive into his somewhat perverse mind, the lights go out before blinking back to life in short pink and blue bursts as techno music fills the cabin. A disembodied voice comes on and encourages guests to move freely from car to car and enjoy the different pleasures each station has to offer.
Jasper and I step farther into the crowded car, only to be quickly separated from everyone as one giant dance party breaks out. A woman in a short frilly dress that glows lavender under the black lights quickly passes out glow-in-the-dark glasses, tiaras, and crowns to everyone around.
“When in Rome,” Jasper says, landing a tiara over my head before planting a crown over his own. How about you and I find a quiet place where the king and queen can communicate properly?
A tiny laugh evicts from me. Communication has quickly become a code word for far more exciting forms of expression.
“What about the investigation?” I try not to shout it up over the music in the event the person at the center of our investigation is lurking nearby.
“It’s going to be a long trip. We probably don’t want to make it weird.”
“You’re so right.” I take him by the hand as he weaves us through the crowd until we come upon a woman dancing on one of the tables, and I groan as soon I see that leather dress swishing back and forth. “Juni!” I shout up at her. “We’re on a moving train! Get down before you crack your head open!”
A beefy man wearing a leather vest steps up. “Don’t you worry, little miss. I’ll make sure she doesn’t hurt a hair on her head.” He belts out something between the roar of a lion and the howl of a werewolf before pulling Juni down and landing her in those tree trunks he calls arms. He beats his chest with his left hand, and Juni chortles up a storm.
“What did I tell you, Bizzy?” she shouts while kicking me on the arm with her shoe. “Third time’s the charm.” That last word gets pulled out as he swiftly makes off with her.
“Should we be worried?” I shout as they disappear out of sight.
“Nah,” Jasper says, navigating us in the same direction. “Juni is perfectly capable of handling anything he throws her way. Let’s hope I don’t have to make an arrest at the end of the night. And I’m talking about Juni herself.”
“Hear, hear,” I say as we move from one boisterous car to the next, until we come upon a narrow hall with doors that lead to rooms on either side of us. The music is just as loud, the
lights are just as seizure-inducing, but there’s not a soul in sight.
Jasper and I try each one of the doors until we come upon one that isn’t locked.
“In here,” I say, pulling him in and groping for a light switch before flipping it on.
Both Jasper and I gasp in unison as the tangle of bare limbs splayed before us—and oh my word, is that a…?
The man turns our way with a fury in his eyes, and it’s none other than Tiger Caldwell. And from over his shoulder pops the familiar blonde mane of my sister.
“GAH!” I call out as Jasper flicks off the lights and yanks us out of there at dizzying speeds.
“I saw his—”
“I know,” Jasper grunts. “A bad moon rising. Let’s find a place to call our own.”
“Good idea. And I promise, no lights this time,” I say as we try another set of doors until one opens up again.
Jasper twirls us into the room, and just as he’s pulling me close, the train gives a rather violent jerk and I stagger off to my left.
A hand reaches for me and my arms glide around his body, but I can’t help but note his cologne holds more of a bitter appeal than it did before.
His mouth finds mine, and his kiss feels off and sloppy. Come to think of it, this doesn’t even feel like Jasper—
I slap the wall until the lights pierce the darkness and four voices cry out at once—the loudest of which is my own.
“I JUST KISSED MY BROTHER!” I shout as I smack Hux on the chest.
To my left, Mackenzie stares dreamily at Jasper right up until I pluck her off my husband and break the spell.
“Do you mind?” I snap as I quickly trade places with her. “And for the record, this never happened,” I hiss as I switch back off the lights and lead Jasper the heck out of that den of depravity. “Geez,” I say, rubbing my lips over my sleeve like a toddler. “We’d better wash our mouths out. She didn’t infiltrate the fort, did she?”
Jasper sighs. “Entirely my fault. But in my defense, I thought we were finally about to communicate effectively.”
“Come on,” I groan as I pull us back out of this rabbit hole. “Let’s disinfect your kisser with hard liquor.”
Sealed with a Hiss Page 10