by Piper Rayne
I nod. I’m all for protecting Jolie.
“Please don’t take that as me not trusting you.”
I shake my head. “I wouldn’t bet on me either, Frankie.”
I descend on her tits again, but she takes my head in both her hands and pries me off. “I am betting on you, Jax. My heart is fragile too, but I’m a grown adult and own my decisions. Jolie would be the collateral damage here. Me not wanting to tell her has nothing to do with me not believing in you.”
Jesus, where is the woman who hates me? The one who would roll her eyes at me and look at me as though I’d never grow up? Now she thinks I’m the one to bring her a happily ever after? She’s crazy, but damn if she’s not enough for me to want to try.
I pick her up off the counter, heading to the kitchen table so I have better access, but the buzzer rings. We stop and look at one another with frustration. Who the hell is cockblocking me at this time of night?
She flies off the table, pressing the button. “Hello?”
“Frankie,” a man’s voice says. “Let me up.”
She looks at me with wide eyes. I’ve never seen her scared like this. “Who is it?”
“Michael.”
I press the button to let him up. Time for Michael and me to have a conversation. But first I need to put on pants.
Chapter Twenty
Frankie
* * *
“What are you doing?” I ask Jax as he walks across the room and puts on his dress pants from earlier.
He buttons his pants and looks at me. “You need to put something on.”
I look down and head into the kitchen to pull my shirt over my head. “I’m serious. It isn’t your job to fix this.”
“I’m going to pretend that we didn’t just agree to be something more to each other seconds ago and argue that I’m your friend too.”
Anxiety eats away at my insides. “This is a really bad idea.”
Michael knocks on the door. It’s the middle of the night, which means he’s probably drunk or high—or both. The only good thing about this is that Jolie isn’t here to witness whatever is about to go down.
Jax walks to the door with his shoulders straight as though he’s ready to start a fight. I run and block his path, throwing myself between him and the door. Tonight was going so well. “Promise me you won’t lose your temper.”
His face softens for a minute and he leans in and places a chaste kiss on my forehead. “I’m not gonna do anything of the sort.” His hand goes for the doorknob.
Some of the anxiety leaves my body.
When Jax opens the door, Michael leans back and checks the number of the apartment, probably thinking he’s standing at the wrong one. “Who the hell are you?”
“Jax,” he answers.
I peek my head around Jax. “It’s not a good time, Michael.”
“Come on in for a second. We need to have a chat.” Jax steps aside, and I step back.
Michael steps into the apartment. “Who are you? Her boyfriend?”
I shouldn’t be waiting on Jax’s answer as eagerly as Michael is.
“Yes,” Jax responds with confidence.
“Well, that’s great, but what I’m here for has nothing to do with you. Where’s Jolie?” His pupils are little dots, a clear sign he’s been using, and not just alcohol tonight.
“She’s not here,” I say.
He walks around the living room. “Why? So you could have your boy toy over? How convenient. And you say you want sole custody of her?”
“Just leave,” I say.
He pulls papers out of his jacket. Man, Mr. Holder found him fast as soon as he came back into town. “Give me one reason I should sign this?”
“Because you can’t care for her. I told you, if you get clean, I’m more than willing to reevaluate, but you’re not someone who should be in her life right now.”
He slams his fist on the wall. “I’m her father!”
Jax steps forward, but I slide between him and Michael. This is my problem. Not Jax’s.
“I’m not going to have this conversation again,” I say. “You’re not good for her right now. All you bring her is heartbreak. If you want to get sober, go to rehab and we’ll talk.”
He looks at me, then behind me to where I can feel Jax’s breath on my neck. “I’m just supposed to let this guy slide into my spot in this family?”
I shake my head. “We’re not a family. You know that.”
Whatever drug he’s on right now, he’s allowing me to talk to him and there’s no anger blaring from his eyes. It’s a welcome change.
I ask, “What if you hit her? You already hit me when you were using. I know you’re not normally violent, but you’re not you when you’re messed up.”
He squeezes his eyes shut. “I said I was sorry.”
“I know you are, but if you don’t get help, there’s no way I can allow you to spend time with her. And I know the man I first met, the one who I hope is still in there, agrees. He’d never want his daughter to be hurt the way he was.”
Michael collapses on the couch. “But if I sign this, then it’s over. The court will never let me be in her life.”
“I’m her mother. I have a say too.” I hate lying to him, because although I wish Michael would get clean, the chances are slim at best. He has to do the work. I can’t do it for him. All I can do is protect myself and my daughter. And although Jax is ready to step in, I have to handle this. “Please think about what’s best for her. Sign the papers, get yourself clean, and then we’ll talk.”
He looks at the papers and back up at me. His eyes seem sincere as he nods, but right as I step forward, he shakes his head. When he looks at me again, I see someone else there.
“I’m not going to sign anything and let this douchebag be her father. She’s mine!” Michael rips apart the papers and they sprinkle to the floor. “Fucking hell, Frankie, how could you do this to me?”
“Me?” I point at myself. “I’m not the one who just showed up high and a hot mess.”
“All you are is a fucking bitch! A whore who spreads her legs for anyone!” He nods at Jax.
Jax walks around me and nudges me behind him. “I’m going to tell you this once—you are not welcome to show up on Frankie’s doorstep unannounced. And you don’t speak to the mother of your child like that. She’s the one raising your daughter, working her ass off because you can’t man up and take care of your responsibilities.”
Michael cocks his fist back, but Jax punches him before Michael gets the chance. He stumbles, but Jax grabs Michael’s shirt to keep him upright, his fist at the ready again.
“You think you’re some tough guy, hitting a woman?” Jax hits him again.
I grab Jax’s arm to stop him and he lowers his arm to his side, letting Michael go.
Michael stumbles back and loses his footing, falling to his ass. “Fuck you, asshole.”
“Get the hell out of here! And I meant what I said—don’t show up here again without contacting Frankie first to make sure it’s okay,” Jax yells.
Michael stands and holds his eye that’s already swelling. “Nice people you hang out with, Frankie, I’m sure my lawyer would like to hear about this guy.” He looks Jax up and down as though he’s not intimidated.
Jax glares at him, waiting for Michael to make a move so he can put him on his ass again.
“Just leave,” I say, fighting back tears.
Michael huffs. “Figures you’d fall for a guy like this. You always did like the damaged guys, right? That way you can hide all your scars underneath theirs. Good luck with her,” he says to Jax. “She’ll make you think you’re the screwed up one, but really it’s her.”
Jax steps closer so they’re chest to chest. “Do you need me to show you the door?”
Michael laughs, continuing to hold his face. “See you in court.”
He walks out, and Jax locks the door. I sit on the couch and rock back and forth, clenching my shaking hands.
Jax
comes to the floor in front of me, taking my hands. “He’s an asshole. Don’t listen to him. He’s high and probably doesn’t even know what he’s saying.”
“I just want him out of my life, but he’s Jolie’s father, so he’ll always be part of it.”
Jax sits next to me, sliding me onto his lap. “I think it’s time you leave this apartment. I don’t like the idea of him showing up at night when you’re here by yourself.”
“I’m fine.”
“Does he come by a lot in the middle of the night?” Jax asks.
I could lie, but that’s not exactly the best start to a relationship. “Sometimes. Not lately, because he left town, but something obviously brought him back. I’ll have to call Mr. Holder in the morning.”
We sit in the chair, Friends playing in the background, the two of us lost in our own thoughts.
“Move in with me,” Jax says.
My head whips in his direction. “No.”
“I’m not gonna take no for an answer. You’re not safe here. Neither is Jolie. He never comes around Ink Envy and he wouldn’t even know about the Rooftop Apartments, so you’re safe there. If he wants to see Jolie and you’re agreeable, you can meet somewhere else. Or if you want to tell him where you’re living, at least everyone else is there in case he shows up unexpectedly.”
I climb off his lap. “I’m fine. We’re good here.” I pace across the room, looking out the window at the quiet winter night.
“Please don’t,” he says so softly I barely hear him.
“Don’t what?” I turn and press my back to the window.
“Don’t push me away.” There’s so much emotion in his voice, I can’t speak past the lump in my throat. “You know on game night when you got sick?”
I bury my head in my hands. “Way to make the mood even more somber.”
He chuckles. “I liked seeing that side of you.”
“You liked seeing the side of me that had no control and threw up all over you and your couch?” He’s crazy, what is he even saying?
“I liked seeing your vulnerable side. Don’t get me wrong, I fucking love how strong you are. The way you are with Jolie and the way you take shit from no one, especially me. But I also liked that there was a side of you that needed me. And I liked being the one who got to take care of you.”
“Jax—” I shake my head in disbelief.
He holds up his hand to stop me from speaking. “You’re a badass, there’s no arguing that. But this situation with Michael has to be scaring you. And if you really want to give this thing between us a shot, you have to let me in. Now I’m not saying that whatever Michael said was true, and I don’t give a shit even if it is. If you want to trust me with any baggage you have, I’m here. But if we’re going to work, you have to lean on me and let me help you sometimes. You have to let me in to see the sides of you that you guard the most.”
His words are too much, and I sink to the floor and bury my head between my legs.
I hear Jax rise and cross the room. “We all have our shit. Hell, you know mine. But let me help you here. Move in with me. Not because of what’s happening between us, but because I’m your friend first and foremost.” He rubs his hand up and down my back.
“I can handle him.”
He places his finger at my lips. “I know you could handle this on your own if you had to, but that’s my point. You don’t have to get through this alone.”
I sniffle, trying to keep the tears inside.
In true Jax fashion, he tries to lighten the mood. “Please let me keep my balls here and act all apeshit protective over you and Jolie. Just give me this.”
I chuckle and lose the fight and nod. “Separate bedrooms?”
He smiles. “Sure, but don’t kick me in the balls in the middle of the night when I sneak in.”
“And as soon as the Michael thing is over, we move out.” I hold his gaze.
He nods. “Sure.”
“I’m serious,” I say.
“So am I. I don’t want you there any longer than you have to be anyway.” His smile says he’s playing the part for me.
“Good. I’m just afraid you might get too attached to Jolie and me.”
He laughs again and puts his arm around my shoulders. “I’m already attached.”
“And I pay half the rent.”
He shakes his head.
“I’m serious. There are two of us and one of you.”
“Fine, you can pay the electric bill.”
I elbow him in his stomach.
“And the gas.”
“Jax, you have to let me pay.”
He huffs. “Fine.”
I lean on his shoulder, and he kisses the top of my head. “Thank you.”
“It’s nothing. What are friends for, right?”
His words warm my chest, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t wish he said boyfriend. I’m fully aware of the hard road ahead of us—because he’s going to be constantly fighting with himself about whether he’s boyfriend material—but I’m optimistic that he’ll start to see himself like I do.
Chapter Twenty-One
Jax
* * *
I had no idea a woman and a little girl could have so much stuff. Looking around my apartment, I see toys in one corner for Jolie, crap on all the tables, and a blanket over the couch.
Frankie comes out of her room. “Oh, hey, you’re home.”
I nod.
She laughs. “Want to take back your offer?”
“No, just remind me tonight after Jolie’s in bed why I suggested this.”
She shakes her head and crosses the room. “She’s across the hall right now.” Her finger dips into the waistband of my jeans.
“Then why are we dressed?” I press my lips to hers, backing her up to the counter.
It’s only been two days since we had the talk about our relationship, and I haven’t regretted it. In fact, I’m liking the sneaking around from Jolie a little too much. I think it’s because it goes along with my love for breaking the rules.
Her hands slide over my shoulders, pushing my leather jacket until it slides down my arms and onto the floor. I cradle her face between my hands and tilt her head to deepen the kiss exactly how I like it, and she moans. Tonight is our first night in the same apartment with neither of us having somewhere else to go. Scary as that thought is, I’m swallowing my fear. Moments like this make me forget what we’re doing.
The door opens and she pushes me off her. I circle around until my hands are splayed on the fridge.
“Jax!” Jolie jumps over to me.
I shift my weight to situate myself before I scare the poor girl.
But she doesn’t run for me, thank God. She picks up my jacket. “Mommy doesn’t like coats on the floor. She likes them on the coat rack.” She hangs my coat on the lowest hook, and I look at Frankie, who’s laughing. After she hangs up my jacket, Jolie takes my hand. “Come look at my room. Mommy spent all day making it nice.”
I walk into her small room, which used to be Knox’s. We gave Jolie this one since it’s the farthest room from mine. That way when Frankie sneaks into my room, we’re less likely to wake her.
Sure enough, you’d think Jolie picked up her room at their apartment and put it in here. Her rainbow nightlight is plugged into the wall, her bed is pushed against the same wall, and her bookcase is filled the way it was in her old room.
“Love it,” I say.
Jolie hops on her bed, patting it for Gumdrop to join her, but he’s not big enough yet to jump up there. I leave them to it and walk back into the living room to find Frankie dusting my lampshade.
“What are you doing?” I ask.
“Dusting.”
Hmm…
I’m about to sit down and play my video game, turning off whatever this cartoon is, when Jolie runs out, grabs my hand, and tugs me. “Jax, we have to get Earl. Winston keeps peeing on him.”
How is that tree not dead yet?
“But he likes Glenda,
” I say, not about to bring the tree over to our place to take up the little space we have left on our balcony. Let it stay on Dylan and Rian’s massive one.
“Come on.”
“Jolie, let Jax relax. He’s not one of your toys,” Frankie says.
I appreciate the effort, but Frankie’s crazy if she thinks that’s gonna work. I guess nights to myself are over now.
I let Jolie tug me into Dylan and Rian’s apartment, where she declares, “We’re here for Earl.”
Dylan looks up from his magazine, a game playing on the TV. I’m already mourning my single life.
“Oh good, because Glenda has to go to the farm. She’s about to cause a fire.” He puts down his magazine and follows us to the balcony.
“A fire?” Jolie says.
I stand on the balcony, examining the trees. Earl has lost at least half its needles and those that are left are turning a nasty shade of brown. “You know what? I think we should let Earl escort Glenda to the farm, so she’s not scared.”
Jolie gives me the same look Frankie does when I say something that pisses her off.
“Or not.” I raise my hands.
“Jolie, Glenda is really scared,” Dylan says.
She rolls her eyes. I’m not sure even she can deny how sad both trees look. “Okay, but I’m not watching.” She huffs and walks back into the apartment.
Dylan bends down, laughing, and pets Winston. “I think he’s going to miss Earl more than Jolie will.”
“Once more for old time’s sake?” I ask Winston who plops down. “Okay, never mind. Let’s go.”
I pick up Earl, and Dylan picks up Glenda. We take them down the elevator to the trash, then place them next to the garbage container. It’s freezing and I rush back inside.
As we wait at the elevator, it’s clear Dylan wants to ask me something. We’ve known each other forever, so I know his tells by now. Dylan caught Frankie and me kissing when we were moving her out. Ever since, he’s been giving me the silent treatment. I sigh and look at him.
“She’s a kid, you know?” he says softly.
I knew he’d be the one to lecture me. “I know.”