by Marie Force
He got up and rested his hands on her shoulders. “Let’s just take it a step at a time. Can we do that?”
“No, Jer, we can’t.” She took a deep breath. “I don’t know how to say this—”
He held up a hand to stop her. “Don’t. Don’t say anything right now, please? Just give me today and tonight. You can say anything you want to tomorrow, okay?”
“Okay,” she said reluctantly.
After ten years, she could give him one more day.
Chapter Thirty-One
Michael moved through the house like he had hundred-pound weights attached to his legs. He’d experienced the worst feeling watching Juliana drive away to meet her boyfriend or ex-boyfriend or whatever the hell he was. Michael feared he would regret letting her go, even for just two days.
Before he left for the airport, he called his mother to let her know he was going to Florida for the night.
“Oh, Michael, why?” Maureen cried. “I thought you were done with her. Didn’t you just go to the Bahamas with Juliana?”
“I am done with Paige, and things are great with Juliana.” He hoped he wasn’t jinxing himself with that statement. “I just have a few loose ends I need to sew up with Paige.”
“What kind of loose ends?”
He struggled to find the words.
“Michael?”
“She says she’s pregnant.”
“Pregnant?” Maureen gasped. “Are you kidding me?”
“I wish I was.”
“Oh, dear God. How could that have happened?”
“The usual way, I suspect.”
“I’m surprised at you, Michael. I would’ve have expected you to be more careful.”
“I’m always careful, but the one time I wasn’t…”
“She’s trying to trap you.” Maureen’s voice grew more desperate by the second. “You can’t let her do that.”
“Mom, listen. I agree with you. I highly doubt there’s a baby, which is why I’m going down there today. I want to settle this with her once and for all.”
“Do not marry her, Michael. No matter what, you can’t marry her.”
“There’s no way I’m going to marry her. Don’t worry.”
“What does Juliana think of all this? She must be thrilled.”
He couldn’t even think about where Juliana was right then or what she might be dealing with. “She’s supportive. She knows whatever happened with Paige happened before she and I were together. But we both hope Paige is lying.”
“And if she isn’t?”
“Then I guess I’m going to be a father.”
“Oh, Michael,” Maureen sighed. “All this on top of everything with the trial.”
“I know. As always, her timing is exquisite.”
“I’ll be thinking of you, honey. Call me when you get home, okay?”
“I will. Love you, Mom.”
“Love you, too. You’re a good man, Michael. Don’t let her do anything to make you feel otherwise. Do you hear me?”
He smiled. “Yes, ma’am.”
All Michael could think about on the two-hour flight to Jacksonville was the last time he made this trip and met Juliana. The plane landed in the midst of a stormy downpour in northern Florida that mirrored his mood as he rented a car to drive to Amelia Island. He hadn’t told Paige he was coming so she wouldn’t have time for plots or schemes.
The relentless rain turned what should have been a thirty-minute ride into an hour-long ordeal. Michael parked in the Simpson’s driveway and was drenched by the time he got to front porch. He rang the bell and pounded on the door, but there was no answer. “Goddamn it!” Now what? Shivering in the cold rain, he ran down the street to the home of their friends where he knocked on the neighbor’s door and almost groaned with relief when it opened.
“Michael?”
“Hi, Mrs. Davis. I’m glad you’re home. Do you know where the Simpsons are?”
“Come in. Get out of that rain.”
“I’m soaking wet.”
“It’s fine. Come in.”
She went into the powder room and came back with a towel for him.
“Thank you.” He wiped the towel over his face and was careful not to move off the mat in the front hall. “Do you know where they are?”
“Honey,” she said in a lilting southern accent. “Paige is in the hospital.”
“Why?” Michael gasped. “What hospital?”
“I’m not exactly sure why, but she’s at Baptist. Do you know where it is?”
He shook his head, so she wrote down the directions. Handing her the towel, he thanked her for the information. As he ran back to his car, his heart pumped with exertion and anxiety.
Michael sped through the rain, squinting to see the street signs as he followed Mrs. Davis’s directions. Arriving at the hospital forty-five minutes later, he noticed that the rain had let up some.
He asked for Paige at the information desk and was directed to the third floor. In the elevator, he read that the third floor housed the obstetrics department. “Fuck,” he groaned. “Fuck!” The elevator opened, and he rushed into the hallway, stopping short when he came face-to-face with Admiral Simpson.
“Hello, Michael,” the Admiral said coldly.
Michael wiped the rain off his face. “Admiral, where is she?”
The Admiral studied Michael for a long moment before he gestured to a door on the left side of the hallway.
Michael went to the door and took a second to compose himself before he pushed it open.
Asleep in a hospital bed, Paige was so pale her face blended in with the stark white sheets. Even her lips were all but invisible. An IV hung over her with a bag of blood hanging next to it.
Eleanor looked up when Michael came in.
“Mrs. Simpson, what happened? What’s wrong?”
“She had a miscarriage, Michael. It was pretty bad. She lost a lot of blood.”
“Oh.” He fought off a sudden rush of nausea. I didn’t believe her. Oh God, I didn’t believe her. “When?”
“Two days ago.”
“Why didn’t you call me?”
“She asked us not to.”
Michael moved to the side of the bed, overcome by guilt over how badly he had handled this. Tears burning his eyes, he reached for her cold hand. Oh, Paige, I’m sorry I didn’t believe you. I’m so sorry. Keeping a firm grip on her hand, he stared down at her. He was so intent on Paige he didn’t notice when Eleanor slipped out of the room.
What felt like an eternity passed before Paige finally stirred. She blinked him into focus. “Michael?” she whispered, her blue eyes swimming with tears. “I told them not to call you.”
“They didn’t. I came to see you like I promised I would when the trial was over. Mrs. Davis told me you were here. I’m sorry, Paige. I don’t know what to say.”
“I’m so sad, Michael. I wanted our baby so badly. I’ve lost you. I’ve lost the baby. There’s nothing left.”
He brushed the hair back from her face. “You can’t think like that. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you.”
She shook her head. “I drove you away, and I probably did something to make the baby die, too. You were right when you said I’m a horrible person. This must be my punishment.”
“I never said you were a horrible person.” He sat on the bed and took her in his arms as she sobbed. “And you didn’t do anything to hurt the baby, Paige. You couldn’t have.”
“I was so awful to you. I was like someone I didn’t recognize after you broke up with me. You didn’t even believe me about the baby.”
“No,” he admitted. “I really didn’t, and I’m sorry for that.”
“I told my parents not to call you because I knew you’d think it was just another ploy, and I wouldn’t have blamed you.”
“I’m sorry things got so bad between us that you couldn’t call me when you needed me.”
“I’m the one who’s sorry.” Sobs shook her fragile body. “Losing you was the
worst thing that’s ever happened to me—until now. I was such a monster, and I’m so ashamed.”
He settled her back against the pillow but continued to hold her hand. “It’s all in the past now. Let’s just forget about that and focus on getting you better.”
“Michael, can I ask you something, and will you tell me the truth?”
“Of course.”
“First, I want you to know I’ve learned a lot about myself in the last two months, and I’ve realized I need to make some changes. I’ve let my parents, especially my dad, be too involved in my life, and that needs to stop. I know now it’s time to start acting like a grown-up and not like their princess. So here’s my question: in light of these discoveries I’ve made, is there any chance at all that we can put things back together between us?”
“I don’t want to hurt you, Paige.”
“Just tell me. I need to know.”
“I’m sorry but no. Our time together was so special to me, and I’ll never forget all the good times we had. But it’s over now. It’s time for both of us to move on.”
Tears spilled down her cheeks. “That’s what I figured you’d say. I really blew it with you, and I’m always going to be sorry for that. You were so good to me, better than I deserved.”
“I loved you, Paige—very much—and for a very long time.”
“I loved you, too.”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
“The baby… could they tell if it was a boy or a girl?”
She shook her head. “It was too soon to tell.”
“And you’re okay? You can have others?”
“I should be able to.”
“That’s a relief.”
“What would we have done if it had lived?” she asked.
“Hopefully, we would’ve worked something out so he or she would’ve grown up with two loving parents who were able to put aside their differences to do what was best for their child.”
“I think we could’ve done that.”
“Eventually,” he said with a small grin.
She smiled. “I’m sorry I was so crazy. I’ve thought a lot about that last night, the night of the engagement party, the way I acted.” Shaking her head, she added, “I can’t believe I hit you. I’m sorry, Michael. I was just out of my mind. I can’t even explain it. There’re so many things I wish I could do over again.”
“I’m sorry I insinuated the baby wasn’t mine. That was an awful thing to say.” He kissed her hand. “And if I’ve learned anything from the last couple of months it’s that being an adult means piling up the regrets.”
“I was horrified when I heard about the shooting in the courtroom. Thank God you weren’t hurt.”
“It was pretty crazy. I’m just glad it’s over.”
She squeezed his hand. “I appreciate that you came, Michael, but you can go home now.”
“I’m not going to just take off and leave you in the hospital.”
“It’s okay. There’s nothing you can do, and we’ve said everything we needed to say. I want us to end on a good note.”
“Paige…”
Her eyes glistened with new tears. “Please, Michael.”
“I’ll call to check on you,” he promised with a kiss to her forehead.
She nodded.
“You’re a special girl. You just need to believe in yourself, and you’ll find what you’re looking for.”
“Thank you,” she whispered, releasing his hand. “Thank you for everything, Michael. You waited for me to grow up a lot longer than most guys would have.”
He leaned in to kiss her cheek. “I loved you, and I won’t forget you.”
“I love you, too. I probably always will.”
“Be well, Paige.” He waved one last time from the door. In the waiting room at the end of the hallway, he found Admiral and Mrs. Simpson. “We, um, we had a good talk.” His neck stiff with tension, Michael ran a hand through his damp hair. “She asked me to go, but I don’t feel right about leaving while she’s in here.”
“What she needs hasn’t been of much concern to you lately, Michael,” the Admiral said.
“Be quiet, Joe,” Eleanor said to her stunned husband. “Paige behaved terribly, Michael, and I know she’s ashamed of herself. I was ashamed of her, too, when I found out just how awful she’d been to you. It’s no wonder you cut all ties to her. I have no doubt you would’ve done the right thing by that child, if it had lived. Just the fact that you came here after the trial like you said you would, despite what she put you through, tells me everything I need to know about you. But you have no reason to be here anymore. We’ll take care of our daughter, and when she’s back on her feet, it’ll be time for her to take care of herself. In fact, it’s long overdue.”
Astounded by the longest speech he had ever heard Eleanor Simpson make, Michael had no idea what to say.
She went up on tiptoes to kiss Michael’s cheek. “It was a pleasure knowing you, Michael. I wish you all good things in your life.”
“Thank you.”
“Joe, let’s go back in with our daughter.” She took her husband’s hand to lead him from the room.
Overcome, Michael sat down in the waiting room and dropped his head into his hands to weep for the child he hadn’t wanted until he lost it, for the woman he once loved, and for the woman he loved now who was somewhere in the world tonight with the other man she loved.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Juliana woke up disoriented in the fading light of the late afternoon, and realized she must have dozed off on the sofa while Jeremy was upstairs taking a shower. He had covered her with a blanket and left her to sleep.
She looked around the room, remembering when they bought the furniture on a payment plan they feared they wouldn’t be able to afford. That was before Jeremy landed the job he had now, which took care of most of their financial worries.
The stylish entertainment center came from IKEA, and Juliana smiled when she recalled Jeremy complaining that there were no fewer than ten thousand pieces to it when they got it home. But as usual he put it together in no time. His ability to fix anything, build anything, or puzzle through any mechanical problem made him the “go-to” guy in their group of friends. It was only thanks to him that her old car still had any life left in it.
Everything in the room, from the color of the paint to the framed artwork to the curtains, was chosen together. Juliana’s friends liked to tease her about living with a guy who cared about things like curtains, but she enjoyed the shared pleasure they took in making his mother’s place their own.
It was hard to believe what had happened to them in the last couple of months. After ten almost perfect years together, it all came undone during one disastrous weekend that undermined everything she believed to be true about them. And it had opened the door just wide enough for her to find a new, unexpected love.
She reminded herself that Jeremy claimed he hadn’t acted on the freedom he’d thought he wanted so badly. If anything, he’d done nothing but regret asking for it. So if she had never met Michael, would she be lying here pretending to still be asleep while she heard Jeremy moving around upstairs? Or would she be celebrating his return home after the long separation?
She tried to find the words she would need… Jeremy, it’s over between us. I’m sorry, but the time we spent apart has shown me I want other things out of life. We both outgrew this relationship while we were apart over the last nine months, and it’s time for us to learn how to live without each other. Her eyes teared when she imagined his reaction to hearing that. No way would he let her go without a fight, and the idea of an emotional battle exhausted her.
He came downstairs looking handsome in one of her favorite shirts and black dress pants that must have been new. As he made his way to the sofa, he tugged the maroon cashmere sweater she bought him one Christmas over his head and adjusted the collar on his shirt.
“Babe?” He caressed her face. “Are you awake?”
/>
“Yeah. What time is it?”
“Almost five. You really conked out on me.”
“Sorry.”
“Have you been burning the candle? You know how run down you get when you don’t get enough sleep.”
She swallowed hard as visions of the erotic night with Michael flashed through her mind. “No, I was just tired.”
“I ran you a bubble bath. Why don’t you go soak for a while? We have reservations at Chiapparellis at seven,” he said, referring to their favorite restaurant in Little Italy.
“We do?”
He held out a hand to help her up. “Uh huh.” He kissed her cheek. “Go on up. Take your time.”
“Thanks for the bath.”
“My pleasure.”
She climbed the stairs to the master bedroom. The last time she had been up there was just before she left for the Bahamas with Michael when she came to get some summer clothes. As she pulled her sweater over her head and tossed it on the bed, she wondered how Jeremy would react to the news that she had no plans to sleep with him that night.
Peeling off the rest of her clothes, she walked into the large bathroom and gasped at the vases of pink roses—at least five or six dozen of them. In the tub, rose petals floated on top of steaming bubbles and soft music wafted from the speakers he installed a few years ago. On the edge of the tub, he had left a glass of wine for her.
“Oh, Jer.” She stepped into the tub and let the hot water ease the ache in her heart and in muscles still tender from a night spent locked in passion with another man. Sinking down into the tub, she thought back to Dewey Beach when Michael pulled her—suds and all—from the tub and took her to bed. Where is he now? What happened with Paige? She was dying to know.
Jeremy came to the door. “Everything okay in here?”
“It’s beautiful.”
“So are you.”
“When did you do all this?”
“You were asleep for a long time. I had some time to kill.”
“Thank you.”
He walked in to hand her the glass of wine. “I’ve realized some of the romance had gone out of our relationship before I left for Florida. Now that we’re back together, I hope we can remedy that.”