I groan. “You don’t need to ask.”
A smile tugs at her lips and she shifts to her knees and unzips my jeans, pushing the denim over my hips. My heavy shaft bobs when it’s free, begging for her sweet lips to wrap around it.
Ember lets out a nervous breath, her fingers wrapping around my thickness. Pleasure whips through me, my balls heavy, aching, her touch intoxicating. I groan as her head lowers, her hair spilling forward, that sweet little tongue of hers darting out to lick the bead of cum.
Then her mouth wraps around the head, and she licks and sucks, stroking me expertly, my cock throbbing and engorged and aching with a pleasure that’s almost unbearable.
A harsh groan rumbles through my chest. “Holy hell, Em.”
She keeps sucking, glancing up at me with a look of pure rapture. Those sweet, sultry lips stretch around my thickness, and I’m pretty sure I’ve never seen anything better than watching her suck me off, so much pleasure in her eyes.
My fingers tangle in her hair. “You’re the sexiest woman in the world, you know that?”
She lets out a small whimper, her tongue swirling over the crest of my cock.
I’ve never known this type of need before. More intoxicating than any drug. More powerful than any song. I swear I can feel my heart beating at the same rhythm as her own. Her spark, set a fire inside of me, a blaze amidst the ashes and destruction.
She burned a path straight to my soul.
My muse.
Nothing else matters in this moment but her. The burning heat. The intense pleasure that rages between us. Even if I try, there’s no way I can stay emotionally distant from her.
It’s so fucking good. But her mouth is shredding my self-control.
“Come here,” I moan, pulling her mouth free and her up toward me. I kiss her, rough, desperate and she returns my needy kiss with as much ferocity. “You make me so damn hard, Em.”
Her lips tug up in a smile and she licks her lips. “I like doing that to you.”
I groan. “Lay down for me, sweetheart.”
She does, and I finish undressing her, slowly dragging her panties over her hips, and licking, kissing, caressing her skin. She tastes like sunlight and fresh air.
“So damn sweet.”
“Ash,” she whispers my name as I find her clit with my tongue. Her body jerks and her pussy tightens around my fingers when I press two inside her.
Her fingers dig into my scalp and her hips arch. I stroke her until her desperate cries fill the room.
“I need you inside of me,” she whimpers, her eyes dazed with pleasure when she looks at me.
I lift myself up, reaching to the nightstand for the condom she’s left out. I work it over the length of my shaft, aware of Ember watching my every move. I love the way she looks at me.
It’s not like the fan-girls, the ones who just want to fuck me, to say they slept with a rock god. Ember looks at me like she sees me. Fully. Completely. And my chest squeezes when I recognize the emotions that flicker in her eyes.
She’s falling, just like me.
Or maybe we’re soaring. Because that’s what this feels like.
I press her thighs apart with my knee, my cock pressed against her warm entrance, and hold her gaze as I fill her. She whimpers as my cock stretches her, working my way into the tight, sensitive depths.
Her hips move with mine as I start to thrust, each movement stroking my senses, building up to a crescendo. Pleasure tears through me with each stroke, perspiration beading on my forehead.
Ember’s cries get louder, and I have to quiet her with my kiss.
Her pussy clenches around my cock, and I know I’m close to the edge. So is she, I can see it in her half-masked eyes. Control is forgotten. I thrust harder, fill her completely, the tip of my cock touching the back of her womb.
“Shit, Em,” I breathe out roughly, my own voice sounding like a guttural cry.
It’s too much. The physical pleasure. The emotions.
“I’m so close,” she whimpers, straining against me, her breaths harsh. And then her entire body begins to tremble, her pussy pulsing around my thickness, surges of electricity pulsating between us.
She gasps and I groan and we’re both coming so hard that I’m pretty sure the bed is about to break under us. My cock explodes inside of her, throbbing, shuddering, white hot heat erupts from me and in me. My vision darkens and I swear for a moment the world stops.
And then I’m collapsing, trying not to crush her with my weight, but unable to move.
“You’re incredible,” I murmur against her ear when I’m finally able to catch my breath.
“That was...” Her words are slurred slightly, and when I roll to my side, I see her eyes close. “Amazing,” she says sleepily.
I chuckle. “I thought it was the guy who’s supposed to fall asleep after sex.”
She just smiles, snuggling closer. “I like having you here.”
I wrap my arms around her, drawing her to my chest. “Yeah,” I say, my voice heavy with the truth that this is all temporary. “I like being here.”
It’s not long before she’s fast asleep in my arms, snoring softly. And for the first time in ages, I fall asleep without the aid of booze or sleeping pills. With her beside me, I feel my body relax in a way it never does.
* * *
Cadence returns from Mitch’s, seemingly unscathed. Ember had laid down some ground rules before she left, and it seems like for once he might have respected them. But when he drops her off, there is an obvious tension in the air. Like he is holding something back.
“What aren’t you saying?” Ember asks. She and Mitch stand in the foyer, and I try to distract myself by tuning a guitar. Cadence runs into the house with her duffel bag.
“Nothing,” Mitch says. “We had a great night. Deb loves her.”
“Good,” Ember says. “I want Cadence to feel loved. To be happy.”
Mitch gives her a smirk. My jaw clenches when I see the way he looks at her. Like she’s a fool, a piece of trash. As if he thinks she is below him.
It makes my chest burn with anger, who the fuck does he think he is? But thankfully, he leaves as quickly as he came.
Once his car pulls away, Ember’s eyes find mine. “You better be in my room tonight,” she says with a weary laugh.
She’s trying to keep this light - but at this point, after the things we’ve shared - we both know that’s impossible.
Whatever we have going on, it’s heavy as fuck. And I’m not sure either of us are in a place to carry that weight.
Later, I come into her room once the house is still, past midnight. She reaches for me, her fingers threading through my hair as I enter her. We don’t talk, we silently fuck, let go and come back and start all over again.
Tears slide down her cheeks as she rides me, sitting down on my hard cock, I hold her hips as she moves, her mouth on mine, the salty tears falling to my face. I kiss her hard, as hard as I fuck her. And we come, breathless, exhausted. As one.
When I wake, I realize it’s well past dawn, and the last thing Ember needs is her daughter finding me in her bed. It’s too much of a risk to stay - one of the guys sees me here and it will confirm everything they already think.
“Shit,” I mutter.
Ember is still fast asleep beside me, snuggled close, a small smile playing at her lips. I don’t want to wake her, so I do my best to roll out of bed slowly, and gather my clothes. I put my jeans on, then quietly open the door, then close it gently behind me.
“Fun night?” a deep voice says behind me.
I turn, meeting Synn’s gaze. He’s sitting at the kitchen island eating a bowl of cereal, and the look he gives me, he knows exactly what I’ve been up to.
With a heavy sigh, I walk toward him, knowing there’s no point denying it. I grab a bowl and pour cereal and milk in it. Synn hands me a spoon, still glowering at me.
“You going to lecture me?” I ask.
He grunts. “Would it matter? You d
o whatever you want anyway.”
“This is different. I...I really like her.”
His gaze narrows. “Then you shouldn’t have fucked her. You know what’s going to happen. You’re going to break her heart, and from what I can tell, the woman has already been fucked over once before.”
“I’m not going to hurt her.”
He snorts. “So what’s your plan? You’re going to ask her to move to L.A.? Have her and the kid come on tour with us?” He shakes his head. “She’d never go for it. Her life is here, and your life is—”
“Fucking supermodels and snorting blow,” I say bitterly. “A life to be proud of.”
Synn shakes his head. “So you want this?” he asks, motioning around him. “A boring ass life in the middle of nowhere, raising some other dude’s kid.”
“Yeah, maybe,” I say, my jaw clenching.
“Yeah, right,” he says. “A couple more weeks of this and you’ll be bored—”
“Maybe you don’t know me as well as you think you do.”
“I know you better than you know yourself. And I know one thing, you’ve never committed to anything in your life.”
“That’s bullshit and you know it. I’ve given everything for the band.”
He laughs bitterly. “No. We’ve given everything for you. Coddled you like a fucking toddler, cleaning up your messes. I’m over it, Ash.”
“Fine. Then move on if that’s what you want.”
“What I want is for you to grow up for once in your life and think about anyone else but yourself.”
“That’s what I’m trying to do,” I say, a little too loudly, because I hear a door open, and footsteps.
I turn and see Cadence walking toward us, wearing her pink, princess PJs and rubbing her eyes.
“Hey, kiddo,” I say, lifting her up in the stool and giving Synn a warning glance. “You hungry?”
She grins up at me. “Pancakes?”
I rub my hand over her head messing her hair. “Coming right up.”
Synn is still sitting at the island with her, and as Cadence starts chatting away, I see some of his tension ease, and a small smile tugs at his lips when he looks at her.
She’s got him wrapped around her little finger too.
Chapter Seventeen
Ember
My heart does a small flip when I walk into the front room and find Cadence with Ash, singing her heart out as he plays the chords to a song I’ve never heard.
I slept in this morning, which I never do. But last night with Ash exhausted me. Emotionally and physically. Even today my head is dizzy with thoughts and emotions and uncertainties...and hope.
“Mommy.” Cadence sees me and jumps up, clapping her hands. “Ash wrote me a song. Do you want to hear it?”
I glance at Ash, who just grins at me.
“Of course.”
“Are you going to sing it?” Ash asks her.
“I don’t know all the words.”
“Okay, how about we sing it together.”
She nods, and Ash’s fingers start moving over the strings of his guitar.
His voice has my knees weakening and butterflies taking flight in my stomach when he starts to sing, “Beautiful girl, with a smile so bright. Your giggles alone could light up the darkest night.”
I may forget to breathe as the song continues and Cadence joins in.
Together they belt out, “We can dance, and we sing, we can do about anything. Because we know, oh, that love is a beautiful thing...”
When the song is over, Cadence gives a little curtsy and they’re both smiling at me with expectant looks. But tears have gathered in my eyes and my throat is clenched shut.
“Did you like it, Mommy?”
I nod, finding my voice. “I did, baby girl. So much.”
Ash’s eyes are on me, searching me, but I can’t look at him because I know I’ll just break down.
I love the man.
And I know Cadence does too.
But time is against us.
“I’m going to be a rock star, too,” she says, spinning around, and making herself dizzy.
Dusky comes into the room and chuckles, picking her up, then hanging her over his shoulder and tickling her. “I thought ye were going to be a ballerina, lass.”
She gives a full-on belly laugh. “I’m going to be both.”
He sets her down and takes her hand, holding it above her head as she does a pirouette and belts out a few words from the song Ash wrote.
“A rock-ballerina. I love it. Ye’d be popular over in Europe. They like weird shi—” Dusky stops and winces. “Weird stuff like that.”
Cadence looks up at him, clearly enraptured by the giant of the man. “Is that where you’re from? Why you speak so funny?”
Dusky’s head tilts back and he laughs. “I’m from Ireland. Ye know, the place with leprechauns and fairies.”
Her eyes widen. “For real?”
“That’s what the legends say.”
“Can we go there, Mommy?”
“It’s pretty far away,” I tell her. “Maybe one day.”
“It’s gorgeous in the summer. My mum’s garden is huge,” he tells her. “She grows pumpkins as big as Synn’s head.”
Cadence giggles at this, and Synn gives an exaggerated frown. “Why’s it me everyone thinks is full of himself. Have you guys looked around the room?”
Everyone laughs and Saint mentions that their agent Maryll was really happy with the latest songs they sent her.
“That’s fantastic,” I say, thankful that staying here is working well for them.
“Yeah,” Ash says. “Maybe if we send her a few more she can let us take a week off.”
“Already itching for a holiday?” Synn asks. “We’ve only been here for three weeks.”
Ash shrugs. “I’d love to take a trip to Saint Martin’s. I could use some sun.”
His words send a jolt through me. Is he really wanting to leave? And more than that...he wants to go to the Caribbean? The way he talks, it’s like it isn’t a big deal at all.
In our moments of happiness, I forget the divide between us - but as quickly as the feelings come, they fade. Ash gives me a grin. “Wouldn’t that be awesome, for all of us to head to paradise for a few days?”
“I’ve never even left the country,” I admit.
Dusky shakes his head. “Lass, we’ll need to change that. You and Cadence can be our roadies for our next tour, see the world.”
And just like that, it’s normal again, the guys laughing and Cadence running her fingers over the piano keys. And I realize these guys really do care about my daughter and me in the same way that we care about them.
“Forget tropical beaches, I’d be happy to be back in L.A.,” Saint says, and the other guys grunt in agreement. “Cadence would love Malibu,” he continues. “I could take her to my favorite taco trucks.”
In moments like this, it feels like Absinthe is more than a rock band, it feels like they are the uncles my little girl never had.
There’s a knock on the door, and I pull myself away from the conversation, a smile tugging at my lips, so wide it makes my cheeks hurt. My heart feels light.
Everything seems right.
But as I open the door, and see the stern looking man in a suit, holding a manila envelope, I feel the ground beneath my feet start to shift.
“Can I help you?”
“Ember Hamilton?” he asks.
“Skye,” I manage to say. “Hamilton was my married name.”
“I need you to sign for this.” He holds out a clipboard and pen, and I take it, scribbling my signature.
“What is it?”
He takes the clipboard back, then hands me my envelope. “Custody papers. You’ve been served.”
Chapter Eighteen
Ash
Despite how strong she’s trying to be, I know Ember is a mess.
She’d come back into the room looking like she’d seen a ghost, and when I’d scanned the papers
she handed me, I knew why.
The asshole was claiming she’s unfit, and like she’d feared, he was using her criminal charges against her.
Charges that should have been his.
I hate the fucker. But as much as I want to drive over to his place and make him pay for the anguish I see in Ember’s eyes, I know that would only make things worse.
I feel helpless.
And responsible.
Synn is still angry with me, but I tell him and the guys what happened, and that I need the day off. Ember needs me, more than I need to come up with another hit. And honestly, we already have enough songs for a full album.
Dusky and Saint seem happy about the break, but Synn just grumbles and heads back to his room.
After I make a few phone calls, I find Ember in the kitchen preparing lunch, and I can hear Cadence’s giggles in the backyard.
“Hey,” I say, wrapping my arms around her waist from behind and pulling her back against my chest. “How are you doing?”
She sucks in a shaky breath, melting against me, and whispers, “I can’t believe he’s doing this.”
“We’ll fight it—”
She turns in my arms and blinks up at me. “We?”
I hadn’t realized I’d said it. There’s hope in her eyes. Hope that I want to give her. But I can’t make promises I’m not sure I can keep.
“I called my lawyer. She’s good. I told her to hire someone to look into Mitch’s past. If there’s any dirt, she’ll find it.”
“You didn’t have to do that. And I can’t afford a fancy lawyer.”
“I’ll cover the cost.”
“Ash.” Her forehead and palms rest against my chest and I feel her tremble. “What are you doing?”
There’s a heaviness to her words.
I tilt her chin up. “I want to help.” Scratch that, I need to help. More than I’ve ever needed to do anything in my life.
“I’m terrified,” she admits, tears forming in her eyes.
“I know.” I kiss her forehead, my lips lingering there, breathing her in. I’m terrified too. For her. For Cadence. For me. And something inside of me screams to make promises that I’m not just going to help, but that I’ll be here, beside her, through it all.
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