“One of the hardest things ever is to like a person, but hate what they’re doing to your loved ones.” Rick shook the ice in his stainless-steel tumbler, a wisdom in his voice only those who’d lived could achieve. “I’ve always adored Valerie.”
Brooke nodded. She’d met quite a lot of lovely people at her job. People trapped by circumstances and situations that forced them to act in not-so-wonderful ways. They’d become the bad guy in the scene, but that wasn’t who they truly were. With Brooke’s assistance, those people were only the bad guys in a one-act play. She wanted the disagreement between Valerie and Dan to be only a one-act play and nothing that dragged out in family court.
“Why would Valerie come back now and want joint custody after all this time?” Nichole swapped her eyeglasses for sunglasses as if that would clarify things. “It doesn’t make sense.”
Brooke wanted to understand Valerie’s intentions, too. Dan had given Brooke sanctuary. Brooke wanted to restore Dan’s world, disrupted by his ex’s arrival, then she could leave, confident she’d made a difference in Dan’s life. The same way he’d made a difference in hers. Brooke glanced at Rick. “Do you think Jason knew about Valerie’s intentions?”
“Valerie and Jason arrived together. And that seems to be all they planned together.” Rick rubbed the back of his hand over his mouth as if to stop himself from revealing more. “Then again, that could be just an old-timer’s faulty observations.”
There was nothing faulty about Rick’s mind. Brooke believed in a father’s intuition. Her own dad’s intuition had guided her more than once over the years. Not to mention her own intuition she’d relied on during her career. That voice, rusty from lack of use, whispered through her now. “I got the same impression at dinner last night.”
“Dan never talks about how Valerie and Jason became a couple.” Nichole stared at the soccer field, her eyebrows pinched together over her glasses. “They seem as mismatched as Dan and Valerie obviously were.”
“Dan wasn’t always so set in his ways and uncompromising. Jason wasn’t always so remote and detached.” Rick scratched his chin, yet his grin broke free. “Believe it or not, all three are quite free-spirited. The boys got that from their mother.”
The spark in Rick’s gaze and the chortling gave him away. The boys took after their father. “What happened?”
“Dan had a child,” Rick said. “Roots became his priority.”
Brooke tracked the foursome across the soccer field. Good-natured teasing and banter echoed around the group. The exaggerated boasting earned more laughs than fear in the other players. Jason placed both Wesley and Ben near the goal and demonstrated how he wanted the boys to kick the ball. Jason looked anything but distant and disengaged. Double fist bumps for each of the boys, encouraging words, then he released them to score. Goals followed along with several rounds of high-fives. “What happened that changed Jason?”
“We told the boys that Jason was adopted.” Rick’s pain was obvious.
“Dan never mentioned that to me.” Nichole turned to face Rick. “Not once. Not even during any of those long playdates and weekly dinners of our tiny single-parent club.”
“The boys are sixteen months apart. Dan only ever cared that he had a brother.” Rick pulled off the lid of his tumbler and tossed the ice onto the grass as if he was already cold enough. “Jason has only ever been Dan’s brother. His family.”
Family was Dan’s foundation. His priority. But he’d lost his brother. Then his wife and his marriage. Valerie leaving would’ve shattered everything Dan lived by. That wound would’ve been deep and intense. Brooke mused, “But the fact mattered to Jason.”
“Jason dropped out of college and left to find out who he was.” Rick’s gaze remained on the field, the distance in his voice suggesting he was replaying a memory.
“Did he find himself?” Nichole spoke quietly as if she feared her words might carry across the field and disrupt the play.
“I think he might still be searching.” Rick stuffed one of his hands inside his pocket. “I want to believe if Jason came home for a while, he might remember.”
The anguish in Rick’s voice wrapped around Brooke. He was a father who wanted his son home.
Brooke looked out at the field. She’d lost herself, too, after the accident. Retreated to the mountains for a new life. Yet she still wondered if she’d ever find herself again. Or if she even wanted to. What if she found herself and realized everything she wanted wasn’t right? Would she have the courage to change? Perhaps Jason was in a similar place.
Or perhaps that was Brooke not wanting to be the only one lost.
No, she wasn’t lost, only misplaced. Temporarily. She’d find the place she belonged soon.
The boys scored again, then rushed Dan, tackling him onto the grass. Brooke’s smile came from deep inside her.
And a voice inside her—one that sounded like her mother, earnest and patient—whispered through her. What if the place you belong is the very one you’re running from?
That had been her mother’s advice after Brooke had suffered a difficult breakup in college. Brooke had wanted to transfer schools. Her parents hadn’t agreed.
Her father’s advice: if you run every time, you’ll never actually get anywhere.
Brooke had stayed, completed her degree with honors and gotten multiple job offers, then met her late husband.
But was it running away if she was merely passing through to begin with?
And standing here in the park, opening up to Rick and Nichole, might feel right. Even good. But she had nothing else. This afternoon only really proved she was ready to find a new home, make new friends and move on.
Her urge to run across the field and join the ice war between Dan and the boys proved nothing more than Brooke needed more exercise.
Her phone vibrated in her pocket. She wasn’t running. That was the same argument she’d used as her defense with her parents all those years ago. She pulled out her phone and studied the text message from Ann Ellis.
“You okay?” Nichole asked.
“My former in-laws have leads on two houses up north for me.” And they’d thoughtfully added the details about the memorial in three weeks. Every year, they celebrated her former husband’s life at one of his favorite places in the city. This year it was the beach.
She stuffed her phone away and locked her knees. That proved she wasn’t running. She couldn’t run, anyway. After all, she wasn’t certain which direction to go.
“That’s great about the houses.” Uncertainty edged through Nichole’s tone.
“Yeah. Really great.” Brooke wasn’t confident, either. But she wanted a place of her own again. Why wasn’t she thrilled? Excited to get back to the life she needed? She wouldn’t have to make up yet another excuse for not attending the celebration of Phillip’s life. Don and Ann would understand the work involved in relocating and rebuilding.
“Are you close to your in-laws?” Nichole asked.
That was a loaded question. She’d been very close until the accident. Now it was complicated. Her therapist had labeled it survivor’s guilt. Brooke called it betrayal. Look at her now. Enjoying the day at the park with another family. This could’ve been her and Phillip, waiting on Ann and Don to join them for a picnic. But that wasn’t her world anymore. And that guilt she expected refused to surface. “I’ve seen Don and Ann over the years when they’ve visited family and friends up north, where I was.”
An excited shout grabbed their attention. Brooke turned to see Valerie, loaded down with bags, weaving her way toward them, a buoyant smile on her face.
“Valerie has enough food for two soccer teams.” Nichole rushed to intercept Valerie.
“That girl never learned restraint.” Rick shook his head, but his grin returned. “She was born to hostess, always keeping a crowd well-fed and entertained.”
Bro
oke walked with Rick toward the picnic tables. Had Dan been surprised to discover he’d married a hostess, or had he known before the vows were recited? “Dan told me that he only ever wanted a marriage like his parents’.”
“Didn’t work out that way the first time for Dan.” Rick’s glance at Brooke was speculative. “Nothing says he still can’t have it with someone else.”
“He deserves that.” Yet Brooke wasn’t the someone else. She couldn’t be. Sure, she wanted to enjoy life again. But being in love could be more heartbreaking than uplifting. Love wasn’t for the weak. Brooke wasn’t weak. She was careful. If she wasn’t careful, her heart might be shattered again and possibly wouldn’t heal a second time.
Rick set his hand on Brooke’s arm, stalling her retreat. “After my wife died, I was quite lost. Then a dear friend told me that I have to live for those that love me. I owed them that much.”
Brooke was living, wasn’t she? She was fine. She’d leave love for someone else.
Nichole pointed at the table covered with take-out containers. “Valerie bought out the entire restaurant.”
“I wasn’t sure what everyone liked. Every entrée sounded delicious.” Valerie added serving spoons to several containers. “I settled on a sample of everything.”
“Taquitos and guacamole.” Nichole lifted the lid on one of the containers and rubbed her stomach. “One of my favorite things.”
“These you can take to your committee meeting at the school.” Valerie picked up a to-go box filled with taquitos. “Do you think you need more?”
Nichole accepted the container. “This should be plenty.”
“There are chips, too. I ordered extra.” Valerie grabbed a bag of chips and added several containers of guacamole to the top. “Everyone’s mood will improve with snacks. I guarantee no one will be able to turn you down if you ask for help.”
“Thanks. This is great.” Nichole adjusted the takeout, then wrapped Brooke in a one-armed hug. She whispered, “Now I really am a traitor for liking Valerie even more.”
Brooke nodded.
Nichole backed away and took off her sunglasses to look at Brooke. “If they end up in court, I promise I will sit on Dan’s side in the courtroom.”
Court wasn’t an option. Not for Brooke. She’d worked with much less likable clients in the past and succeeded. She wanted Ben to have something positive from his mother’s return. And she wanted to leave knowing that she’d made a difference.
And if the thought of leaving made her heart squeeze a little? Well, that was much better than broken.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
THREE DAYS AFTER dinner and two days after the park, Dan pulled into the school car line, fixed his gaze on the sedan in front of him and not his brother, who was beside him. The one speaking French fluently. And typing rapidly across his notepad like a seasoned business executive. That was, if the exec wore workout clothes and a black baseball cap to assist with Ben’s afternoon soccer practice.
Dan self-assessed: pulse normal. Vision clear. Airways unobstructed.
Only, a deep chill seeped from his core. Had he ever really known his brother?
Jason ended the third of his business calls and shifted easily into English. “So, this is what school pickup is all about.”
Deciphering the letters on the sedan’s license plate was simpler than figuring out his brother. Dan spit out one word: “French.”
“Spanish, too.” Jason waved to an excited Ben on the sidewalk. “Some German and Mandarin.”
Dan’s jaw dropped, letting his racing thoughts escape unspoken. What else didn’t he know about Jason? “Why?”
“Keeps the misunderstandings to a minimum for work.” Jason unlocked the doors.
Dan spoke English and misunderstood. “You’re a poker player.”
“That’s only one of the hats I wear.” Jason twisted in the seat to greet Ben.
Ben tossed his backpack on the bench seat and climbed into the truck. “Dad, did you check on Archie?”
Jason looked at Dan. “Who’s Archie?”
“Archie lost his eye and part of his ear.” Ben leaned between the front seats, wonder and pride in his voice. “Luna helped take out Archie’s stitches, too. Because the animals knew it was infected. Isn’t that awesome?”
“That’s...” Jason’s voice trailed off as if he struggled to find a good response.
Dan could relate. His brother spoke multiple languages. For business. Wore multiple hats—whatever that meant. And made Dan reconsider everything he’d assumed he knew.
Ben sat back and buckled his seat belt. “I need a pet like that, too, ’cause it would save me.”
That was Dan’s job. That much Dan knew.
“Sounds like you have quite a few smart animals at your house right now,” Jason said.
“They belong to Brooke,” Ben said. “Dad keeps warning me that they’ll all be leaving. Soon.”
That chill turned to frostbite. Brooke. Jason. They’d all leave. And Dan wasn’t certain he’d be as numb to their departures as he wanted to be.
“You want them to stay?” Jason asked.
“Definitely. Brooke let me make dog treats with her last night. And I got to hold Rex’s leash by myself on our walk. Even Grandpa came with us and walked Luna, so Brooke could work on training things.” Ben’s backpack fell on the floor with a thunk. “Dad won’t let the dogs use the backyard so we gotta walk them.”
Ben and his grandfather didn’t have to walk the dogs. The dogs belonged to Brooke. Dan had to work, otherwise he would’ve walked, too.
“Grandpa claims he likes the exercise,” Ben added.
“Or the company,” Jason offered.
Dan had enjoyed Brooke’s company at dinner. And the next day at the park. Then he’d worked, caught up on his sleep and hadn’t seen Brooke yesterday or today. Now he missed her. Not in the I-can’t-live-without-you kind of way. More in the I-wish-you-were-here-so-I-could-share-a-story kind of way. The kind of way that made his day better because she was in it. The friends-only kind of way.
“Auntie Ava is gonna come over, too, so she can walk and exercise with us.” Ben unwrapped a granola bar. “And Wesley’s mom. She says she’s too clumsy in a gym, but she thinks she can handle walking. So she’s gonna walk with us, too.”
It was like a walking club. With so many people walking with Brooke, how was Dan supposed to have any time with her?
“But you know what?” Ben’s voice dipped into seriousness and he sat forward again. “Brooke won’t walk toward the Garden District or Bayview Street. No matter how many times you ask her. Even though there’s a dog park that way.”
“Maybe she’s worried about Rex and the other dogs,” Dan suggested. Yet Brooke talked about the importance of socializing the dogs.
“Grandpa says he thinks it has something to do with the accident,” Ben said.
“What accident?” Jason asked.
“I don’t know.” Ben rummaged in his soccer bag. “Grandpa said there was a bad car accident and her husband became an angel.”
Brooke only ever mentioned the accident to Dan. She’d never given any details. Never said it had happened in the city. Then again, Dan never pried. Still, Brooke always asked about Bayview Street and State Street whenever he drove. On the way to the vet. The grocery store. Even dinner.
Was that why everyone wanted to walk with her? Had he been forcing her to walk, even though it scared her? Surely, she would’ve argued more to let him use the backyard. Surely, she wouldn’t believe he could be that cruel. But then, she’d have to trust Dan with her painful past. And if she trusted him, Dan would have to trust her. That was precarious territory. They were better like they were.
“Sounds like Brooke has been through a lot.” Jason slipped on his sunglasses, but the concern was there in his voice.
What had his bro
ther been through? He’d assumed it’d been one endless travel party fashioned by Valerie.
“Yeah. But you know what?” Ben asked repeatedly yet never waited for a response. “She’s still really nice and happy. Except she gets sad but says she’s fine. Dad can fix that.”
Dan cleared his throat, swallowed. A tightness settled in. He wasn’t responsible for Brooke’s sadness. If he was, he’d want to hold her tight and protect her. Promise her that she wouldn’t ever be sad again. Not with him. That was impractical. Impossible. No one could keep a promise like that.
“How so?” Jason asked as if he sensed Dan was struggling for a response.
Dan was struggling, period. To explain his brother. To help Brooke. What had she told him? Let the moment be as it is.
“That’s his job, Uncle Jas.” Ben’s tone was direct, as if he stated what should’ve been obvious. “Dad says some people tell him they are fine, but he can tell by looking at them that they aren’t fine. Then he helps them feel better.”
“You think Brooke needs to feel better?” Jason asked.
Yes. Definitely. Dan had seen the sadness in Brooke, too. And that already pulled at places inside him that he was trying very hard to ignore.
“No one wants to be sad, Uncle Jas,” Ben said. “That’s not fun.”
Dan had to switch the subject. Now, before Jason and Ben brainstormed ways Dan could cheer up Brooke. Dan already had a few ideas and those weren’t appropriate for the friends-only zone. Things like more dates. More Friday nights around the fire pit. Sharing butter-pecan ice cream.
Dan glanced into the rearview mirror and caught Ben’s gaze. “Speaking of fun and exciting things, we never talked about the picnic on Sunday.”
Ben held Dan’s gaze and chewed on his snack bar. “You want to know what I think about Valerie.”
Dan considered correcting Ben. Valerie was his biological mother. But did that mean Ben had to call her Mom? This was new territory. “Yes. I wanted to know what you think. How you feel.”
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