“His lungs … too strong,” she mumbled sleepily.
“I got him, Kam. You can go back to bed.”
“It’s okay. I’m already up. I’ll make his bottle while you change his diaper,” she said as she turned toward the kitchen, her steps slow and sloth-like.
I opened the nursery door and approached the crib, and Adam choked on his sobs as I soothed, “Momma is here, little one.” His cheeks were stained red, and tear tracks ran down under his little chin. I scooped him up and rubbed the pacifier across his lips as I swayed him back and forth to ebb the tears. When he was settled, I laid him on the changing table and changed his diaper, all the while humming his favorite lullaby.
I didn’t expect the struggles of single parenthood when I’d decided to keep the news of my pregnancy from Prince Sebastian. Luckily, I’d had the support of Kamrin every step of the way. Even Klaus, as adamant as he had been about being honest with the Prince, had stepped in at times, helping me with the baby when Kamrin would be at work or running errands. They’d both stepped in and were as much co-parents to Adam as I was a single mother.
I’d made myself a recluse since his birth, never taking Adam out of the house. He was yet an infant, and he didn’t need to be exposed to germs of others at such a young age. But eventually, I’d have to find childcare for him as the clock was ticking and my maternity leave was soon to expire with no further extensions. I was concerned Kamrin’s work schedule wouldn’t mesh with mine, and caring for my son wasn’t my sister’s responsibility.
As I sat in the rocker by the crib and placed Adam on my lap, I noticed how his looks were changing. His eyes had finally changed from the deep midnight blue and to a piercing hazel—like Sebastian’s eyes. Adam resembled me with his dark as night hair and round face, but his eyes and nose were all Sebastian. It hurt my heart that Adam was five-months-old, and yet his existence remained a secret from his father—Prince Sebastian, heir to the throne of Wyvernbank, but the turmoil that would be caused if the secret was revealed… I wouldn’t be the cause of a war between nations.
“It’s too late to be lost in your head, sister.” Kamrin’s voice pulled me to the present, and I looked up to find her standing in front of me, sleep-deprived and holding the baby’s bottle. “Do you need me to feed him?” she asked.
I extended my hand and shook my head. “It’s okay. I enjoy his late-night feedings.” I took the bottle from her outstretched hand and didn’t even have it placed against his lips before his little hands grasped onto it and pulled it forward. Adam latched his lips around the bottle and sucked, emitting small gulps of pleasure as he filled his belly.
“You need to get out of the house, Ali.”
“It’s three am, Kamrin,” I replied.
I could feel her disapproving gaze, but I tried to ignore it. “I don’t mean right this second. Tomorrow. Take Adam for a walk. The park is lovely this time of year, and you both could use some fresh air.”
I shook my head. “It’s not safe, Kamrin.”
“So you’re going to keep your child holed up inside a small three-bedroom apartment for all of eternity?” she challenged, her hands placed firmly on her hips as she shot daggers at me. “Tell me, Ali, how is it not safe?”
This had been an argument between Kamrin, Klaus, and I for a couple of months now. At first I used the excuse that Adam had been too young to be out, but only Klaus understood the real reason. I’d never been open with Kamrin about who Adam’s father was, and that was a secret I’d keep from even my sister for as long as I could.
Klaus had tried to convince me that all was safe, and that my concerns of possible prying eyes were without cause. But Sebastian had the money and power to keep his eyes on me at all times, even if I hadn’t caught anyone in the act, so to speak.
“I’m serious, Ali! You’re going crazy staying inside all the time. It would do both you and baby Adam some good.”
“Kamrin, am I doing the right thing?” I asked abruptly, and I could feel my lip quivering.
“What do you mean, Ali?”
“Adam. I don’t talk about his father because it breaks my heart. He doesn’t even know he has a son. But there’s a reason, that which is my own, and I’m simply protecting my son.” I shook my head, feeling stupid for even broaching the topic with her. Kamrin didn’t know all the details behind my tryst with Sebastian, and it was much too late to get into all of that now. “Never mind. I know the answer to all of that. I’m talking out loud.”
“Ali, I’m always here if you need to talk. You know that, right?”
I nodded, swaying baby Adam on my lap, his little eyes fluttering closed.
“Maybe tomorrow we can all go to the park, and maybe grab lunch afterward.”
Kamrin clapped as she bounced on her toes, and I quickly tapped my lips with my finger, signaling for her to be quiet.
“He’s finally asleep,” I whispered, and she grasped her chest with an awed expression, as she slowly backed out of the room, mouthing goodnight.
I continued to sway Adam on my lap as I let my mind wander, now one more worry in mind. But Kamrin was right, I couldn’t continue to hide away from the world. Tomorrow I’d take baby Adam out on his first adventure, consequences be damned.
18
Sebastian
Stacks of paperwork littered the surface of my desk, the glass coffee table in the center of the room, and even the side tables on either end of the expensive ottoman. I was overwhelmed with work, my lack of focus lately causing me to fall behind. Ambassador Clavets was a thorn in my side, and I’d stalled his every effort of meeting with King Regis to propose an arranged marriage between myself and his lovely daughter, Elena. But that proposal was preposterous. Elena was content and in love with Tomas, and I … I was consumed with work and serving the people of my land.
A heavy knock pulled me from my thoughts, and before I could answer, Patrick burst into the room. He quickly pulled the door closed behind me, looking around the room suspiciously. There was a wired look about him, the color having drained from his face. I couldn’t remember the last time he looked this out of sorts.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, anxiety clawing at my chest. “Is everything alright? Is it my father?”
“No, no,” he mumbled, “your father’s fine.”
“Then what?”
“I just received a message from the private investigator. It seems there’s been a break in the case regarding Diplomat Smith.”
My heart plummeted into my stomach. I hadn’t heard her name spoken aloud in what felt like forever. I thought I had managed to move on, but just the mention of her last name was enough to leave me reeling. The tips of my fingers started to tingle, suddenly cold. I held my breath and willed my heart to stop thrumming, but that only seemed to make things worse.
“Out with it,” I snapped. “What about her?”
“She was seen with a young woman, at a park local to her in Sunyata.”
Dread washed over me, threatened to drag me into the deepest, darkest pits of despair. I couldn’t explain what caused that feeling, but it was there—right in the pit of my stomach. “What?” I breathed. “Is that all?”
“Well, no, sir.” Patrick hung his head, nervousness apparent in his demeanor.
“Then what?” I hissed. “Dammit, Pat, just tell me. You’re killing me here.”
“She… She was pushing a carriage, sir,” he said, sounding almost like he was asking a question.
“What?”
“A baby carriage.”
My mind reeled at the possibility, but could it be so?
“The younger woman Alison was with … is it possible the child is hers?”
Patrick took a step forward and crossed his arms over his chest, looking down at me with a serious and pointed glare. “After receiving the case notes from the private investigator, I confirmed the information before relaying this to you.”
The man was maddening with his bits of clues then strained silence. “Out with it, Pa
trick. What did you confirm?”
Patrick nodded and pierced his eyes closed as he breathed, “Alison gave birth to a healthy baby boy, five and a half months ago. Seven pounds, four ounces.”
“Pat, what are you saying? Are you serious?”
“The child could be the second in line to the throne. You’re a father, Prince Sebastian.”
I was floored … completely stunned into silence. I couldn’t process all the emotions that were bombarding me at the moment. Joy that we’d created a precious child together. Anger that it took a private investigator to bring me this information. Then back to excitement that—I was a damn father!
“Sebastian, focus, please,” Patrick urged, and I looked up to see his pacing the room.
“There’s no time to focus, Patrick. I need a flight to Sunyata—now.”
He sighed, frustrated. “Your Royal Highness, had you been listening, you’d heard that all has been scheduled. But I do encourage you to go about this matter with caution.”
I dismissed his statement with a wave of the hand as I slid my cell phone into my breast pocket and rounded the desk to leave the room.
I had a flight to catch.
I’d been a nervous wreck the entire flight to Sunyata. Patrick obviously took care of minor details like booking the last-minute flight on the Royal Family’s private jet, arranging a small, discreet team of personal security officers to accompany me, and tracking the location of Alison’s family home. I studied what I was going to say to Alison when I saw her, over and over again in my head. I wasn’t entirely sure how she’d respond to me showing up out of the blue after what was drawing closer to the better part of a year and a half. I thought she was going to be angry. I thought I was going to be angry. After all, she left without a word. Not even so much as a goodbye.
Patrick had arranged for me to stay in a hotel located near Alison’s apartment so that I could pop over as frequently as I pleased—if I would be welcomed. He had even gone through the trouble of mapping out a predetermined route to ensure I didn’t get lost on my way, as well as avoid the general Sunyata public by taking numerous side streets.
Alison’s apartment building was smaller than I imagined. On a diplomat’s salary, I would have guessed Alison lived in a place much more modern and chicer.
After knocking on the door and not getting an answer, my security detail and I waited rather impatiently for Alison’s return. It was getting dark, so I’d hoped she wouldn’t be much longer.
I heard movement from my team, and the sweet scent of jasmine filled the air; I knew Alison was nearby. As she cut the corner of the hallway and met my gaze, the shock was evident in her expression as her face fell. She stopped in her tracks and hurriedly rushed to lift the baby from the carriage holding him protectively to her chest.
“What are you doing here?” she pleaded, her voice wobbly. Before I could reply, a shorter version of Alison rounded the corner, a panicked look upon her face.
“Who the hell are you?” she asked, standing protectively in front of Alison. She took in the scene before her, and it appeared she was mentally counting every member of my security detail.
“Alison, may we talk please?”
“Hey, pal, did you not hear me ask you—who the hell are you? And what the hell are you doing at my sister’s apartment?”
“Kamrin,” Alison said nervously, “this is Prince Sebastian.”
Her sister froze, eyes widening in shock. “Like, the Prince Sebastian?” Kamrin glanced to me, then to Alison, and then back to me. “No freaking way.”
“Miss, please be mindful of your language in the presence of the Prince,” Patrick demanded, by my side.
“And who the hell are you?” Kamrin hissed, immediately defensive.
I shook my head and approached Alison carefully.
“I mean you no harm, Alison, but I would like to talk, in private if you will. My security detail will remain outside your door until our conversation is over,” I pleaded, and Patrick spoke up, with, “Miss, would you mind joining me for a coffee so the Prince and Miss Alison may speak privately.”
“Oh no you don’t, pal! I’m not leaving my sister with this man and his goons! Move out of our way now!”
“Kamrin, stop!” Alison said calmly, grabbing her sister by the wrist. “It’s fine, go ahead with Patrick. He’ll return you once the conversation with Prince Sebastian has concluded.” She sounded as if we were planning to negotiate a contract or peace treaty, not the existence of my son.
“Ali, I’ve already said I’m not le—” she started, but Alison cut her off with, “Sebastian is Adam’s father, Kamrin. Now please, go with Patrick. I’ll fill you in later.”
“Wait a second,”—Kamrin gawked in shock—“the Prince Sebastian is Adam’s father? Oh my God, I need to tell someone about this.”
“You will do no such thing,” replied Patrick.
Alison’s sister—Kamrin—looked up at Alison in shock and said, “Really, this is how I find out my nephew is a damn prince! Woman! You have a lot of explaining to do!”
“Later, Kamrin. Please. Sebastian and I have much to discuss.”
Patrick took the young lady by the arm and gently led her out of the building. I’d seen a small café just up the block from Alison’s apartment, so I was sure he wasn’t taking the young woman too far, only giving Alison and I some privacy for a short while.
Alison approached her apartment, the baby snug against her chest, and I followed closely behind, signaling to a guard to retrieve the carriage while Alison unlocked the door.
I followed her inside and closed the door behind us, then stood patiently while she settled the infant.
“I take it that’s your sister,” I started, mumbling awkwardly.
Alison eyed me carefully. She hadn’t changed in the time that we had been apart, only motherhood strengthened her beauty tenfold.
“She’s always been the dramatic one,” Alison whispered, gently tucking the baby into a playpen.
“Is that… May I hold him?”
Alison tensed, her breath catching in her throat. She nodded hesitantly, and I took a careful step forward, testing the waters. I sat on the edge of the couch and watched the peaceful, sleeping baby. Very carefully, I ran my hand over the baby’s little head, a sweet smile stretching across my face.
“He looks just like you,” I mumbled.
“You think so?”
“Definitely. He got all of his mother’s good looks. What’s his name?”
“Adam.”
“That’s a good name.” I chuckled tenderly. “A strong name.”
“What are you doing here, Sebastian?” Alison asked softly, but firmly.
I continued to admire the baby boy, unsure of how to broach the topic of Alison leaving.
“Patrick learned that you’d had a child, and I had to see it for myself that you had moved on.”
“H-how did Patrick find out?” Alison inquired, not making eye contact with me.
“The private investigator I hired to find you after you left Wyvernbank submitted a case log of new evidence to Patrick, who relayed the information to me. Thus, here I am.” I swept my arms out wide in display of my presence.
“You’ve been watching me?” she asked in disbelief.
“I was worried about you, Alison. All I knew was you’d returned to Sunyata, returned to work, then suddenly you weren’t seen at work, or in meetings. For months, the PI wasn’t able to offer any new leads, and I was hopeless. Then the PI sent Patrick images of you at the park with a baby carriage, snuggling a baby on the park bench. I was completely in shock.” I shook my head, reining in my anger. She didn’t deserve that emotion just yet. “You owe me an explanation, Alison.”
“I wanted to tell you myself when I was ready.”
I glared at her, my resolve wearing thin. “And when was that going to be? When the boy was eighteen?”
“Of course not,” she muttered. “I just needed time to figure things out.”
“Why didn’t you tell me you were pregnant? I could have … I could have been there for you. You didn’t have to go through all of this by yourself.”
“I did have to.”
“Of course you didn’t. What happened, Alison? Why did you leave Wyvernbank without another word or explanation?” I demanded to know. She’d hidden my son from me for months, without any just cause or reasoning.
She gasped on a sob and clutched her hand to her chest.
“That night after our private dinner, after Klaus and I went back to the hotel, a man came to my room.”
I pressed my lips into a fine line, listening intently.
“He threatened me,” she continued. “He told me to stay away from you. He told me that I wasn’t good enough for you.”
“Why didn’t you just tell me this?” I asked, my expression softening. “Do you have any idea how worried I was about you?”
“I didn’t want to leave. I swear, I didn’t. But the man threatened to expose us if I didn’t go, and I was scared because I didn’t want anything bad to happen to you.”
I reached out slowly and caressed the side of Alison’s face. “This entire time, I thought you left because you didn’t care. I thought you didn’t feel the same way about me.”
Alison shook her head. “That’s not true at all. I just thought … I thought I was protecting you. And when I found out I was pregnant, I knew that it would only hurt you more if I returned.”
I gingerly pressed my lips to her forehead and breathed in deep, the scent of her perfume bringing me back to our first and only week together. Things had been simpler then, nicer. And now we were together again, albeit however briefly this would be, and my heart was consumed with the overwhelming news that I hadn’t just found Alison, but my son as well.
“Alison, I know you’re scared, but I’m here now. All I ask is that you don’t run away anymore. I want to get to know you. I want to get to know my son. I promise you, nothing else in the world matters to me more than you two. So don’t push me away, even if you think you’re protecting me. I want to be part of your life. You just have to let me.”
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