“Okay, I will leave you alone to get cleaned up. I’m going to stay and run the samples so you can have the results as soon as possible.”
“Thank you,” I say. “And I’m sorry, for being difficult.”
“Oh, dear, don’t ever apologize for that and don’t call yourself difficult. Healing and getting through a traumatic experience are only things difficult for you. Not anyone else. Okay?”
I tilt my lips in a sad smile. “Okay.” She drops the gown I’m wearing to cover me up and disposes of her gloves as she exits the room.
Plopping my head onto the table, I give myself a minute to get composed, then swing my legs over the side of the bed and stand.
Yuck.
Every woman knows my pain when they feel that damn jelly between their legs after an exam. It’s the most uncomfortable, disgusting feeling in the entire world. I waddle to the counter and grab a few tissues, clean myself up, and get dressed.
My stomach rumbles when I think of breakfast and head out the door toward the elevator. How can they afford something so spacious with a freaking miniature hospital in the basement? I press the button against the wall and the hum of the elevator descending vibrates the floor and stainless-steel doors.
It dings and the doors part, giving me an elegant view that matches the rest of the home. The floor is marble and the mirrors lining the wall are clean, crisp, and hide nothing of the reflection. I hurry to put my hair up, so I don’t look like such a mess since the strands are so tangled.
Satisfied with the messy bun on top of my head, I press the button to the main floor, and lean against the wall as I rise.
I chuckle sadly when I think of how Asher and I have switched spots when it comes to on another. I used to despise him, and he used to want me. Now here I am, getting warm and fuzzy over him and he can’t seem to put enough space between us.
I rub my temples when a headache starts to pound. I don’t want to feel anything for anyone, yet here I am, drawn to him like a moth to flame.
And he wants to freaking squish me, which he has the right to do after what I did. It doesn’t mean I can’t wish for him to forgive me so we can start over.
The elevator comes to a stop and the doors open to reveal the endless hallway that eventually leads to the kitchen. I can smell breakfast from here, similar to the muffins Asher brought into the room last night and I let my nose lead me to where I need to be.
I take my time, staring at the artwork along the wall, the impressive gold statues every few feet. Some are animals like lions and panthers, some are of Greek Gods and the detail is impeccable. Every line on the body, every whisker on the face, it’s lifelike. Minus the gold, of course.
The roar of conversation and laughter has me halting in my tracks. I can hear two babies crying and Quinn begging them to eat so they stop. Owen’s loud baritone booms when he calls out to Jolie. I glance around the corner and immediately notice that I don’t belong here. Sebastian is dancing with Gabriella, laughing at something she said. Grayson is feeding Finley and rubbing her pregnant belly.
Her and Jolie are going to give birth around the same time. Well, Finley is a little bigger, maybe by a month or so, but still, their kids will be close in age and how great will that be?
“Heather!” Jolie notices me watching them like a creeper, but I was just debating if I should step forward or run back to my room. “Come on. You don’t want breakfast to get cold.” She waves me over and Asher doesn’t even look my way.
I don’t feel welcome anymore.
“I’m just going to head back to my room. I don’t want to bother anyone.”
“Nonsense. Come eat breakfast. You need to eat,” Heaven finally speaks up. At least he is talking to me, so that has to mean something, right? I pass the big, sectional couches and take a seat at the kitchen island where a buffet of food is hot and fresh. The smell of salty bacon has my mouth watering.
Jaxon sets down a plate and Asher is behind him, reaching around and scooping up some eggs, plopping them on my plate. Next is a few slices of bacon, then a muffin, then toast, then a bagel. My eyes widen as I watch him pile food on my plate and everyone else stops what they are doing too watch the mountain grow.
Then he puts three pancakes right on top, then drizzles it in syrup.
“There. Eat that.”
I stare at him over the mound of food, which covers half my face as I peer up at him.
Jolie and the other gals giggle and Jaxon slaps Asher on the shoulder.
“What?” he looks at everyone dubiously. “She needs to eat.”
“Not for five people, Asher. Good lord, she’ll explode if she eats all that,” Owen chuckles, bending down to lay his chin on Finley’s shoulder.
“Oh, okay,” Asher stabs one pancake and lifts it off the plate, still leaving more than necessary. “How’s that?”
“This is fine. Thank you, Asher.” I stab a pancake, not bothering to cut it up. I don’t want people to give him a hard time when he is being nice. “It’s good,” I say around a mouthful of food.
“Good.” Asher starts eating from his own plate, chewing on a piece of bacon. He has a deep frown in between his eyes, focusing intently on the slab of bacon in front of him. I don’t like the look on his face. It’s worrying me.
“What’s wrong?” I ask him, wiping my mouth off with the cloth napkin. Jaxon sips his coffee, sliding his eyes toward Asher to see if he says anything, but he remains silent. I lay my fork down and swallow my food. “Out with it, please. What is going on?”
“Did you know your dad was running for governor of California?”
I nod, it’s been going on for a while I might have been kidnapped, but luckily I wasn’t gone for an entire year like Jolie. “Yeah, is there an update? Did he win?”
“You knew?” Asher says, shooting an accusatory glare at me. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Because it didn’t matter? I had other things on my mind than the stupid election.”
Asher tosses his plate, food and all, in the sink and wipes his mouth off with his hand. “Well, it matters now because not only is he the governor, but he has launched an FBI investigation to find you. I don’t have a problem with that, but the first place they are going to look, is me. If they find you with me, I’m going to be thrown in prison again and with our track record, I don’t have much hope in you saying ‘that won’t happen’ so we think it is best if you go back to your family as soon as possible, Heather. It will be better for you and it will be better for me because I’m not wanting to take the fall again for something I didn’t do.” He finishes his orange juice and throws that in the sink too, only this time, it breaks when it slams against the side of the stainless steel.
“Heaven!” Quinn scolds him which wakes one of the babies.
“No, it’s fine. He’s right. The best thing I can do is leave, for everyone sake.”
“Not for Heaven’s reason,” Jaxon leans his hip against the edge of the kitchen island. “What we do, we haven’t gotten caught, but since we all have records, the cops wouldn’t be too keen on having you here. It wouldn’t look good. Now, we might be a band of misfits, but we were wrongfully accused of our crimes. For jobs now, we steal from other criminals. Does it make money? Yes. Is it legal? No. The last thing we need is for the FBI to sniff around. I’m sorry, Heather, but you do have to go back.”
Asher makes a quick departure and exits down the hall. A door slams in the distance and Jaxon sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation. “We will have Officer Howard take you to your parents.”
“I understand,” I agree, but on the inside I’m protesting. “When do I leave?”
“He will be here in the hour to pick you up. I’m sorry, Heather. Obviously, when things die down, you are more than welcome to come back if you want. There are too many people out there looking for you and with Heaven here—”
“No, really, you don’t need to explain. It’s a waste of breath. I understand.” I get up from the tabl
e, barely composing myself, but making the damn best out of the situation, and hold back tears. “I’m going to go shower. Can I borrow some more clothes? I swear, when I get back, I’ll mail them or send some new ones.”
Quinn hands one of the babies off to Jaxon while Owen is holding the other and gives her husband a death stare to. When she stares at me, she smiles and wraps her arm around my waist. “Girl, I have so many clothes that do not fit me right now because my hips freaking expanded when I was pregnant.”
“Don’t talk about those sexy hips like that,” Jaxon inserts. “You talk about them as if they are a bad thing.”
She rolls her eyes. “It is when I can’t fit into anything.”
“All that has to fit is—”
“—Don’t you dare Jaxon! Hush your mouth,” Quinn warns, and I chuckle from their banter. Jaxon pretends to zip his mouth closed and gives me a quick wink. Quinn turns around and huffs, “Now, what were we doing? Oh, right. Clothes. Come on. We can get you straightened out.”
“Thank you,” I say, leaving the room of people I’ve become fond of.
When we are away from everyone’s ears, Quinn and I pass Heaven’s room. I want to knock on it so bad and tell him I’m sorry again, but why bother? Am I glutton for punishment?
“Give him time to come around. Heaven doesn’t get in moods, but I’m learning when he does, they are intense. He will forgive you. It wouldn’t be like him if he didn’t.”
“I deserve his anger. What I did was wrong. I don’t expect his forgiveness. I was just hoping…I don’t know.” I shrug my shoulders when I don’t find the right words.
“You were hoping he would anyway. There is nothing wrong with that, but soon, you can go back to your normal life. That has to be exciting right? Are you happy to see your parents? They must be worried sick.”
If there is one thing I know, it’s that my parents are beside themselves without me. After Grace died, they were overprotective and never let me out of their site and then the one time I fought them to let me do something on my own…
“I’m lucky to have parents like them. My parents weren’t like Asher’s. Mine are so caring and loving. They don’t fight or cheat. They are compassionate, and I can always go to them for anything. Asher’s father was always trying to convince my dad to run for office and dad always turned him down. I don’t know what changed. Dad never told me except that he wanted to do more for the State of California to keep everyone safe. He’s obsessed with safety.”
“Sounds like they really care about you. You are very lucky,” Quinn opens her bedroom door, and I’m stunned silent. I thought my room was nice, but it is nothing compared to her room. When I don’t follow her in, she looks to her right and left and when she doesn’t see me, she spins around. Her blonde hair fans around her, shiny and bright. “Oh, I know. Jaxon is so extra. I know you’d probably think it’s me, but it isn’t. He is so high-maintenance. He has to have the best of the best of everything. It’s a waist of money if you ask me, but not to him.”
“It’s beautiful.” The floors are a white marble and there is a gold chandelier hanging in the middle of the ceiling, sparkling from the sun entering through the windows. There is a huge walk-in closet to the left and the TV is built into a cabinet of sorts at the foot of their bed. At the push of a button, the TV can lower into the unit when they aren’t using it and rise when they want to.
It’s luxury.
I know I should be used to it considering my dad is wealthy and now the governor, but my parents were about keeping our lifestyle humble. They didn’t see the need for frivolous things. They wanted to be able to relate to the community, but now I’m not sure. What if they have changed since I went missing?
Awkwardly standing in the middle of the room, I twiddle my thumbs together as I wait for her to hand me some clothes. I’ll head back to my room and shower, get cleaned up, and then I’ll be on my way like everyone wants.
“Here you go,” Quinn says, handing me a pair of yoga pants and a baggy shirt for comfort. There is also a tank-top with a built-in bra and a fresh pair of underwear.
“Thank you. For everything,” I say, trying not to get choked up. “Without you guys, I don’t know what would have happened to me. Thank you.”
“If you ever need anything—” Quinn digs into her purse that is on the counter and grabs a black card with gold writing engraved on it. “Call us. We will always be here for you.”
It’s kind of her to say, but there is only one person I’m wondering will be there for me, but I think that ship has sailed.
And I’m left waiting at the dock for him to turn around and come back for me.
Only I’ve been abandoned, and it is no one’s fault but my own.
Nine
Heather
When it was time for me to leave, Asher wasn’t there to say goodbye to me. It cuts me wide open and yet my turmoil doesn’t spill out of me. It wraps itself around me like a snake, constricting my ribcage, lungs, and heart, until I’m gasping for breath.
And I have to hide my struggle because I don’t deserve for anyone to feel sorry for me.
“Do you feel okay?” Officer Howard asks as we drive an hour south where my hometown is. “Are there any questions you have for me?”
“I’m good, thanks for asking, and no, I don’t. I’m assuming this exchange will go off without a hitch? Do my parents know I’m coming home yet?”
“Yes, they know. They are already at the police station waiting for you. They drove over right when they got the call.”
“Oh,” I say, waiting to feel happiness or relief, but I don’t. I’m back to feeling absolutely nothing. I know I’ll be happy when I see them, but I’m not looking forward to what will come after. The stories, the people wanting to come over to see me with their own two eyes, the rumors that will drift around about what actually happened to me, the newspaper, reporters. Now that dad is the governor, all eyes will be on our family. I don’t want to be in the spotlight, and I sure as hell don’t want anyone to know what happened to me.
It’s private, but I know it’s better to be open and honest now, than have a million stories brew on their own.
“You know, I can understand why you don’t want to go back.”
“It’s not that. I do want to see my parents. It’s just a lot to take in. A lot has happened and I’m not ready to see the heartache in their face when they see their daughter. But I’m not the same daughter they knew before. I’m different. I don’t know if that is ever going to be good enough for them. I’m not the woman that wants to be in a crowded room with strangers staring at her. I don’t want to dance. I don’t want to plaster on a smile at another charity event. I want to be left alone for a little bit and I know my mother isn’t going to allow that to happen.”
“How do you know they won’t be okay with all that? I’m sure they will be glad to get their daughter back. In any way, shape, or form.”
“Yeah, I have a feeling that’s what everyone says until they get to know the shadow of the person that has returned. I bet they won’t know how to act around me.”
“Of course, they won’t,” he agrees. “They will need to learn who you are now, so remember that, okay? You’re learning and they are learning. It will take time.”
“Right,” I whisper, staring out the window to see the redwood trees kissing the sky. They speed by us fast, it’s what it looks like anyway, but I know it’s us moving since trees can’t just up and run.
Officer Howard’s phone rings and he takes one hand off the wheel to unclip the phone from his belt buckle. When he has it in hand, he slides the button across the screen and brings it to his ear. “Officer Howard,” he answers. “Yes, she’s right here. Of course.” He hands the phone to me and says, “It’s the doctor with your results.”
A lump forms in my throat and my stomach is full of a hundred rocks weighing me down. I break out in a cold sweat as I wrap my hand around the phone. I swallow, coating my dry throat, hoping it stops the
nausea. “Hello?” I answer.
“Heather, I wanted to talk to you about your results,” Doctor Bradshaw replies.
Tilting my head back, I let out a long, heavy breath. It’s best if she rips the bandage off. “What’s wrong with me?” I ask.
“Nothing. Your pregnancy test came back negative, same for the STD screening, and your pap looked great. You’re heathy. Gain five pounds for me, though?” I can hear the smile in her voice, she’s truly happy with the news she gave me.
I double over and hold my stomach as a heavy weight is lifted off my shoulders I didn’t know was there. Grinning, I cry like a loon, shoulders shaking with the force. I need a minute to compose myself. I was so scared that I was going to be pregnant just like Jolie had been, but she had lost the baby.
“Heather? Are you okay? I thought this news—”
“—No, it’s perfect. I’m just happy and relieved. Thank you so much.” I dry my tears on my shirt sleeve.
“You’re welcome, dear,” she softens her tone, speaking to me like I’m a child. “I hope you have a safe and healthy rest of your life Heather. Stay safe, okay?”
“I’ll do my best,” I say, then hand the phone back to Officer Howard since it is his and I have nothing left to say.
“Hello?” he asks, then drops the phone in his lap when he doesn’t get an answer. “She already hung up.”
I see the sign for Petaluma and now that I have my test results, I’m more excited to go home. Something horrific happened to me, but at least the only thing I need to work through are the memories and not something in my blood. I don’t know if I would have been able to get over that. The world would have lost me too, if I’m being honest.
When we pull into town, Officer Howard flips on his lights, and I shrink into the seat.
“Sorry, it’s protocol,” he says.
Cruel Captivation: A Dark Romance (Underground Kings Book 5) Page 9