A Maiden's Voyage

by Rosie Goodwin

  ‘Why, I do believe you’re looking a little better today, dear,’ she said with a relieved smile.

  ‘I do feel better and was wondering if you had any books or anything I might read. I’ve read all the magazines you sent up to me.’ Flora had stopped reading the newspapers. They were still full of the news about the Titanic and she found them depressing.

  At that moment Margaret appeared from the door of the drawing room and she eyed Flora with open disdain.

  ‘Oh, you’re up and about then,’ she commented rather unnecessarily.

  ‘Yes, I er … was on the hunt for something to read.’

  ‘Come with me,’ Alex said quickly before Margaret could say any more and, taking Flora’s arm, she led her quickly away to a room just a little further down the hallway. ‘This is my own private little sitting room,’ she told her as Flora looked around. It was a comfy room with heavy navy-blue velvet curtains at the windows, which complemented the soft, light grey paint of the walls. Antiques were dotted about here and there but there was nothing pretentious about it.

  ‘There’s a bookshelf over there.’ Alex pointed to a corner of the room. ‘Do help yourself to whatever takes your fancy and feel free to use this room whenever you wish. No one else comes in here apart from me and the maid who cleans it.’

  Flora found this rather strange. But then, on the few occasions she had been in their company, neither Magnus nor his daughter had even attempted to include Alex in their conversations so it was no wonder that she preferred her own company. Today Alex was dressed in a simple, dove-grey day dress. That was another thing that Flora had noticed about her. She always tended to dress in quite plain, dull-coloured clothes and yet, if her husband was as wealthy as Patsy said he was, surely she could have afforded to dress more fashionably? Crossing to the bookshelves she began to leaf through the books as Alex ordered morning coffee and when they were both seated her aunt asked, ‘When do you think you’ll feel well enough to go shopping? I’m aware that you must desperately want to get some more clothes of your own but I don’t want you to venture out until you’re quite sure that you feel up to it.’

  ‘Perhaps we could go tomorrow?’ Flora suggested hopefully. ‘We could always come back if I get tired.’

  Alex’s face lit up like a child’s at the thought of the shopping trip ahead. ‘We’ll do that then,’ she said excitedly. ‘And I think we’ll start off in Macy’s. We’ll probably be able to get almost everything you need there. It’s absolutely huge and I’m sure you’ll love it. We’ll open you an account there. Mr Wainthrop has already deposited quite a large amount of money in a bank for you and he will be paying your allowance into it each month. Speaking of which, I almost forgot, I received a letter from him this morning enquiring after you. He informs me that as well as being your father’s solicitor he and his late wife were also close family friends and he’s most anxious about you. He enclosed a letter for you too. I’ll get it now.’

  As she hurried across to a small escritoire in the corner of the room, Flora’s heart began to thump as the enormity of the deception she had embarked upon hit her afresh.

  Alex handed her an envelope then and Flora opened it with shaking hands and began to read.

  My dear Connie,

  I cannot begin to tell you how concerned and distressed I was when I received the news of the Titanic sinking and what relief I felt when I discovered that your name was on the list of survivors. I must offer sincere condolences for the loss of your maid, Flora. I know that you were close and her death must have been a great blow to you, poor girl, especially so soon after the loss of your father. She was a dear girl and will be sadly missed by all that knew her, especially her family who I believe are deeply mourning her.

  Can you begin to imagine how guilty I feel? It was I who booked your passage believing that it would be the trip of a lifetime for you both! I can only extend my heartfelt apologies, but who would have believed what happened after the ship had been declared unsinkable?

  Anyway, my dear girl, I have been to see Mrs Merry, who like myself is grateful that you are alive and well. Would it help if I were to come and visit you? It would be no inconvenience whatsoever if seeing a familiar face would help you.

  With very best wishes

  Victor Wainthrop.

  Panic threatened to choke her for a moment but aware that Alex was watching her closely she said shakily, ‘I must write to him immediately. Mr Wainthrop was almost like an uncle to me. He and his wife regularly came to dinner with me and my father before she passed away and he and Father used to play golf together. He’s known me since I was a baby so he’s feeling very bad because it was he that booked the passage on the ship for me and Flora. I just need to let him know as soon as possible that I am well again. I also need to go to the bank and arrange for some money to be sent to Flora’s family. She … gave them some of her wages each month, you see?’ she ended falteringly as tears welled and streamed down her pale cheeks. Only now did it hit home to her how bereft her family must be feeling. And also, she was terrified that Mr Wainthrop might take it into his head to visit. Were he to do that she would be found out in her lie.

  ‘Of course, you must write to him,’ Alex told her sympathetically as she saw how distressed she was. ‘You’ll find everything you need in my desk. Please just help yourself and when you’ve finished give it to me and I’ll get Thomas to post it immediately for you.’

  ‘Th-thank you.’

  Alex left her then and Flora hastily sat down to reply to Mr Wainthrop’s letter. For a long time she sat staring blankly at the sheet of paper wondering what she should write and eventually she began

  Dear Mr Wainthrop,

  Thank you for your letter. I am pleased to inform you that I am now much better and I assure you that there is absolutely no need for you to make the long journey here to see me. Of course I am still grieving for Flora and would be grateful if you could pass on my condolences to her family and ensure that some money amounting to Flora’s wages could be forwarded to them each month. It seems the least I can do under the circumstances. Please also forward my best wishes to Mrs Merry and assure her that I am recovering and please do not feel any guilt for what has happened. You thought you were doing us a kindness when you booked our passage and you were only following my father’s wishes. Who could have foreseen what was going to happen? I shall write again in due course.

  Yours sincerely

  Constance Ogilvie.

  Thankfully she had seen Connie’s handwriting dozens of times so it was quite easy to imitate and if it did look a little shaky, hopefully he would think it was because she was still not quite herself following her ordeal. She silently blessed Connie for all the hours she had spent helping her to improve her reading and writing. But then she felt even more guilty. How would Connie feel knowing that her friend was using her lessons to deceive everyone? She’d be disgusted with her, and rightly so.

  It was only when she came to put the letter into the envelope that she realised that she had no idea where to send it. Then she spotted the letter he had sent to Alex, which had his address on so she carefully wrote it on the envelope and sealed it.

  True to her word, Alex dispatched Thomas immediately to post it and suddenly feeling worn out and emotionally drained, Flora went back to her room to rest until lunchtime.

  It had been arranged that Flora and Alex would eat in the dining room that day and when Flora came downstairs she found Margaret and Alex already there. She saw at a glance that Margaret had taken her place at one end of the table, which she thought was rather strange. Magnus sat at the other end when he was there, which she was pleased to see he wasn’t, but surely as his wife, Alex should have sat in Margaret’s seat?

  ‘You’re five minutes late,’ Margaret snapped shortly as a maid began to carry the meal in.

  ‘Magnus has gone to see his manager at the shipping office,’ Alex cut in hastily before Flora could retort. ‘He’s quite happy to sit back and let others r
un the company these days, but he still likes to go in and check the books and that all is running smoothly from time to time.’ She smoothed a snow-white linen napkin across her lap as Flora sat down and the maid began to spoon soup into their dishes from a steaming silver tureen. ‘As you’ve probably gathered we like to have a fairly light meal at lunchtime. Soups, cheeses, salads and such and then we have our main meal in the evening.’

  ‘I think she’s been here quite long enough to know that,’ Margaret said sarcastically as she lifted her spoon and began to eat.

  Flora flushed and wondered why Alex didn’t retaliate. How could she let her stepdaughter speak to her like that? Even the servants shouldn’t be addressed that way, as far as Flora was concerned. Surely everyone deserved respect? But then she knew it was none of her business at the end of the day so she lifted her spoon and began to eat. Margaret really was one of the rudest people she had ever met.

  Chapter Thirteen

  The following morning, Alex insisted that Flora should borrow one of her coats. It was slightly big on her but even so she was in good spirits as they set off in Magnus’s gleaming automobile with Alex and herself snugly tucked under blankets in the back seat.

  ‘Take us to Battery Park, would you please, Thomas?’ Alex asked. ‘I’m sure Flora would love to have a peep at the Statue of Liberty. There’s a good view of it from there.’

  Flora stared in awe from the windows as the car swept along. It was the first real look at New York City she had had. It had been much too dark to see a lot when she had first arrived and she had been far too upset to take much notice of anything anyway. She was struck by the difference in the areas they passed: some of them were slums with hungry-looking children playing in the gutters outside while other areas appeared to be very prosperous. In these parts, uniformed nannies strolled along the pavements with their noses in the air, pushing expensive-looking perambulators.

  ‘Of course there is so much to do here, if you have a mind to,’ Alex told her. ‘In the winter people flock to Central Park to skate on the ponds and there are a great many theatres, opera houses and music halls to visit.’

  Flora listened avidly and once they arrived at Battery Park she and Alex strolled to the perimeter to gaze out across the harbour to Liberty Island where the huge statue stood in all her glory. In the park behind them squirrels leapt from tree to tree and watching them it was hard to believe that they were in the middle of a city, although they didn’t have the best view as it was somewhat foggy. An old bag lady passed by quite close to them bundled up in layers of grubby, ragged clothes and hauling everything she owned behind her in an old, rickety trolley and Flora fished in her purse and handed her some coins.

  ‘One day we’ll take a boat trip over to the statue … but only when and if you wish to,’ she added hastily, realising that Flora might not wish to go on a boat again after what had happened on the Titanic.

  There were so many things she wanted to show her but she wanted her to be completely better before they did anything too strenuous. They headed back to the car and soon they were once more cruising through the busy streets of the city. When they finally reached the enormous Macy’s store, Flora got out of the car and gazed up at its exterior open-mouthed.

  ‘Is this really all just one shop?’

  Alex grinned and nodded and arm in arm they went inside. The next two hours passed in a blur as they rushed from one department to another. Flora bought shoes, dresses, underwear, nightwear, a new coat, and so many other purchases that her head was spinning. At one point she held up a lovely blue chiffon evening dress in the very latest style, saying to Alex, ‘Look, this is just the colour of your eyes. Why don’t you try it on?’

  Alex shook her head. ‘I don’t think Magnus would approve of that at all,’ she said as she stared at the dress longingly. ‘He likes me to wear more subtle colours and not stand out.’

  Flora thought it was a shame that Alex always wore such drab colours, but it wasn’t her place to comment so they continued shopping.

  Alex finally led her to the cafeteria, telling her, ‘I think it’s time we had a tea break. You’re not getting too tired, are you?’

  ‘Oh no,’ Flora assured her. She was enjoying herself immensely until suddenly she felt guilty, for she knew deep down that this wasn’t really her money she was spending. Until she had gone to work for Connie all her clothes had come from a rag stall in Petticoat Lane and now suddenly here she was not even having to check the price of things.

  With her tea she had a blueberry muffin, which Alex informed her were very popular with Americans, and she thoroughly enjoyed it. ‘Now, what else do you need?’ Alex asked as she sipped at her drink.

  ‘I don’t think we’ll be able to carry any more when we collect everything we’ve bought already,’ Flora responded.

  Alex chuckled as she helped herself to a scone and spread it lavishly with butter and jam. ‘We don’t have to collect anything. Now that you have an account here everything will be delivered to the house later today,’ she informed her.

  Flora was surprised at the change in her. Back at the house the woman tended to be very quiet and anxious but now that she was away from her husband and stepdaughter she was smiling and relaxed. Even so, as she thought of all the things she had bought, Flora’s conscience got the better of her and suddenly she wanted to go before she spent anything else. After all, she had stolen someone else’s identity and now she was spending their money like there was no tomorrow. Were she ever to be found out she had no doubt whatsoever she could wind up in prison, and, truthfully, she knew that it would serve her right.

  ‘I, er … think I’ve had enough shopping for one day actually,’ Flora muttered and Alex was instantly concerned.

  ‘Oh dear. I fear I’ve made you overdo things,’ she fretted. ‘I was having such a nice time I forgot how ill you’ve been. Come along, I’ll get Thomas to drive us home immediately and then you must go straight to your room and rest until dinner.’

  Flora felt worse than ever as she followed Alex through the store. She was such a kind person and she really didn’t deserve to be deceived.

  On the way home Alex told her, ‘You might like to wear one of your new dresses this evening. Magnus has invited a business colleague and his wife and son for dinner.’

  A mischievous sparkle appeared in her eye as she confided, ‘Between you and me I think he’s hoping the son will take a shine to Margaret. He’s always inviting eligible young men to dinner but none of them have seemed in the least bit interested in her up to now. It’s hardly surprising, is it, really? She doesn’t even attempt to make the best of herself and she isn’t the easiest of people to get on with either. Still, I dare say she’ll get lucky one day.’

  ‘I er … can’t help but notice that she can be quite rude to you,’ Flora admitted.

  Alex nodded in agreement. ‘Yes, she is but she and Magnus are very close so there would be no point in my complaining to him about it. He would simply take her side.’

  ‘Did you and Magnus never want children of your own?’ Flora enquired curiously, then instantly wished that she hadn’t as colour rose in Alex’s cheeks.

  ‘Shortly after Margaret was born, Magnus had an illness that left him infertile,’ Alex told her wistfully. ‘So, in fairness, I knew even before I married him that I would never have a child. It didn’t seem to matter at the time because he was so handsome and so kind that he swept me off my feet. My parents were totally against me marrying a much older widower but I was at the age when I thought I knew best.’ She stared out of the window and Flora saw that there were tears glistening on her long lashes as she went on, ‘For a while after our marriage I was blissfully happy but right from the start Margaret refused to accept me in her mother’s place and eventually it caused a rift between me and Magnus.’ Suddenly she stopped talking and forcing a false smile to her face she said, ‘Hark at me telling you all my woes. I shouldn’t complain, I have a lovely home and now I have you too so I should
be counting my blessings instead of feeling sorry for myself. Just take no notice of me.’

  It was obvious that Alex wasn’t happy, and Flora thought again that she should just leave Magnus and Margaret to it. She was still a very attractive woman. But then, perhaps she was afraid of leaving her husband and the stability he offered?

  Nothing is ever straightforward, she thought. She herself was a prime example. Look at the mess she was in now and all because of one lie that had started aboard the Carpathia when they had assumed that she was Connie.

  Flora stared miserably from the window as she thought of her family and Jamie far away. She now had more money at her disposal than she had ever dreamed of but at what cost? They would all be so disappointed in her if they knew what she had done and the thought drained all the pleasure from the day as she sank back in her seat.

  Within minutes of them arriving home the delivery van from Macy’s drew up outside and a young man in uniform began to carry all Flora’s purchases into the hallway.

  ‘Goodness, did you buy up half the shop?’ Patsy asked with a grin as she started to cart all the boxes and packages upstairs to Flora’s room. She oohed and aahed as she unpacked them and laid the contents across the bed, stroking the soft materials enviously. And then she felt guilty. The poor young woman had lost everything she owned when the Titanic sank and here she was feeling jealous of her.

  Flora meanwhile had flopped down into the chair by the window, not showing much interest in her purchases at all.

  ‘Which dress would you like me to lay out for you to wear to dinner this evening, miss?’

  Flora shrugged. ‘Whichever you think is the most suitable, Patsy.’