Conspired: A Young Adult Dystopian Romance (The State Series Book 6)

by M. J. Kaestli

  Freya hesitated for a moment, and then she hid her face with her hands. “I’m sorry.”

  Shit. I went too far.

  “It’s just I didn’t sleep well last night. I was nervous about meeting you.” She sobbed into her hands. Suddenly, he realized she was faking. “It is still hard for me to talk about my partner, or even think about him.”

  He reached out and rubbed her hand, then slid his hand up onto her arm. “Oh, there, there. My partner died long before your partner left. I have had much more time to heal. Don’t be sorry, I still struggle with it too. Maybe this is just a little too much for one day. You said yourself, you haven’t slept. Why don’t you go and lay down for a while?”

  He gingerly led her into the bedroom and closed the door.

  “I hate you.” She looked at him wide eyed.

  Lewis smiled. From her fake tears, the fact she made it this far to begin with, he knew everything would be okay. They would get through this mission and be successful, together.

  This will take me far. Maybe even to the top.

  Chapter 15

  Ursa

  She peddled casually on her bike as her thoughts drifted. Although she prioritized her exercise schedule, it brought her no pleasure. Her intentions weren’t in compliance with the State’s fitness regulations, but merely to have one aspect of her life where she appeared to be compliant.

  Her dispassionate peddling continued as she cast her gaze back toward the couple she saw the moment she walked in the facility. She knew instantly they were military; she didn’t know if they were there for her or someone else.

  Identifying them was easy, based on the muscular build of the man. Also, the woman seemed a little too enthusiastic about exercising. No one liked exercise that much unless they were one of the States pawns.

  She would have to keep an eye on them to see if they were watching her or continually appeared around her.

  Sometimes, it amazed her she had gotten away with so much, that her organization had smuggled as many people outside of the dome as they had. And sometimes, especially with how the State segregates all operations, she felt she would continue until she reached a ripe, old age.

  The pair moved closer to her. Ursa kept her gaze cast downward, hoping to overhear their conversation. If they just so happened to be newly coupled—and past the age of average coupling—then all she had left to discover was if she was their target. She hoped they would give her some insight as to who, or what they were after.

  “You would have exercised longer if I wasn’t with you,” the girl asked, “wouldn’t you?”

  “We have the day to get acquainted,” he answered. “It would be impolite of me to exercise without you.”

  Ursa rolled her eyes and had to fight back the urge to moan. It was possible the girl wasn’t military, just in the State’s inner circle. Ursa quickly darted her gaze around the room to see the faces surrounding her. People were only starting to file into the facility, which meant they were probably there for her.

  Great. I’ve got to put up with these two dumb asses for a while.

  “I’m just so thrilled that you want to come and do this with me,” he began again. “My last partner wasn’t interested in doing any more than the State’s required amount, and so she wouldn’t go anywhere near one of these facilities with me.”

  Shit, they’ll be here every day. This place just got that much worse. Their pathetic performance is already making me nauseous.

  They continued to role-play their cover story and shared information about their fake previous couplings. Ursa watched every second on the bike’s clock tick forward, eager to rid herself of the nauseating military duo.

  “He was in Security, but no, we didn’t exercise together.”

  “His name was Colin, right?”

  Ursa’s foot slipped off the peddle. A sharp pain radiated up her leg as the peddle rotated and smacked the back of her calf. The pain traveled into her core and burned through her chest. Her entire body flared with heat as she stared straight ahead.

  It’s not possible. That can’t be Freya. There has to be more than one male named Colin who worked Security.

  Even as she told herself the lie, she couldn’t bring her mind to believe it. It may not seem possible, or logical, but she had learned to never underestimate the State.

  No. It is Freya. Colin’s Freya. And she’s here for me.

  The woman she suspected to be Freya wiped at a few tears and darted her eyes around the facility, her gaze landing firmly on Ursa.

  Ursa caught herself, her blatant stare and glanced away. Her head tilted downward, and she returned her feet to the bike’s pedals.

  Her mind spun with every revolution of the pedals. She wanted to cry, to scream, to hurt someone or break something, yet she peddled. No matter what, she had to keep her composure and finish her usual exercise program.

  If she burst into tears, if she reacted, it would do nothing but damn her further. Surely, the military would review the Security footage of each of their encounters. She couldn’t give into temptation; she couldn’t show such blatant evidence they rattled her.

  She forced her mind to numb, hardly conscious of anything surrounding her. The monitor in her shirt finally beeped to signify the end of her required aerobic activity. She was now saved from this public torment. Ursa gathered her wavy locks into a bundle as she stood. She held her head high, her shoulders squared as she exited the exercise facility.

  Breathe. Just breathe.

  She counted each breath in for three counts, then out for three counts. It was all she could do to keep her feet moving forward. Her vision blurred in and out of focus as she walked to her apartment.

  She was hardly cognizant of her environment until a single door came into focus; her bedroom door. The door seemed to pull her forward as though she was gliding; her movements far from her control.

  Her body bounced as she flung herself down on the bed. A flood of tears sprang from her eyes. She could hardly catch her breath as her body shook, and she choked on her own sobs.

  She had no concept of her surroundings nor the time until her partner, Rowen, tucked in beside her and gently placed a hand on her shoulder. “Ursa.”

  She rolled over and clutched his hand desperately. “She’s here.”

  He pushed a strand of her thick brown hair from her supple cheekbone. “Who’s here?”

  With a deep breath, she pushed her emotions to the side. They needed a plan. She had to push through the pain. “There was a new couple—military—near me when I exercised.”

  He looked at her sideways. “Do you know they were there for you?”

  She labored to control her breathing. “They couldn’t be there for anyone else.”

  He nodded; a grim gleam in his eyes. “We always knew the risks.”

  She clutched his hand firmly. “No, that’s not the problem. The woman, it’s Freya.”

  Rowen flinched and pushed away from her. “No. That’s not possible. She’s on the colony world.”

  Ursa manically swung her head back and forth. “No. She’s here, and she’s a spy, sent here for us.”

  Rowen jumped off the bed and paced the slight space. “No. She has to be on the spacecraft. Colin chose her over us. Why else would they send him?”

  “Rowen, it’s her.”

  “No! It can’t be.” He noted his own volume and winced, then quickened his pace. “He was only sent because of her. There won’t be Security on the new world. They would have no use for him. He is there simply because the State won’t uncouple partners.”

  Ursa sat up. She couldn’t stifle the tears flowing down her cheeks, but she had to find the words to make him understand. “But, that’s just it. He shouldn’t have been sent—not without her, but she’s here. The State has a card up its sleeve we didn’t expect. We need a plan. We need to warn everyone that we’ve been compromised.”

  Rowen gripped his face in both hands, covering his eyes. “But why now? And why Freya? If Coli
n went without her, why is she a spy here? Why is the State only now sending someone? If Colin was put on that ship as a punishment to us, why are they only sending her here now?”

  Ursa slid to the edge of the bed. She knew better than to expect her legs to support her weight, but she needed to touch Rowen, her rock. She reached out and grasped his hand.

  “I don’t know. All I know is something more is at play. Hope told us to never underestimate the State. We need to put everyone on high alert. I don’t know what else we can do.”

  Rowen looked down at their intertwined hands. “What about her? She’s a greenhouse worker. She’s going to turn up at your duty tomorrow, mark my words.”

  Ursa blew out air through her pursed lips. “I don’t know. Maybe they think she can gain our trust.” She gasped. “Maybe that’s the entire reason they put Colin on the spacecraft to begin with. Maybe they’ve always suspected us but couldn’t get close enough.”

  Rowen sat down hard on their bed. “We need advice on what to do with her. I mean, we’ve successfully put off spies before. Just because the State is playing dirty doesn’t mean—”

  “No!” Ursa gasped, then clutched his hand even tighter. “No. We can use this. If we play this right, we can use her.”

  Rowen shook his head. “Ursa, I know we need someone on the inside but not her. Colin was petrified of her discovering his roots in the rebellion—and we didn’t even tell him half of what we’d been doing. He was scared of displaying any opposition to the State because she was as compliant as they come.”

  Ursa’s heart pounded, her pulse manifesting in all parts of her body. Her temple, her throat, her fingertips. Electricity flowed through her very being.

  “Rowen, if Colin chose to stay with her, it means their coupling was successful. What if she was as surprised as we were at his departure?”

  He winced. “I doubt that.”

  Her jaw hung limp as she stared downward. “She was emotional. Maybe she didn’t know. Maybe we can turn her.”

  Rowen narrowed his eyes. “That’s unlikely.”

  Ursa looked up at Rowen and blinked back a few times before she replied. “We have to try. The State has already marked us; we will die. There’s nothing more to lose.”

  He shook his head. “Yes, there is. We have our operation and the village outside to think about. We can’t tell her about that. It’s too high a risk.”

  Ursa swallowed. “Then we don’t. We don’t tell her. We make up a story of what our rebellion is really about. We don’t tell her about the community, Hope, or Chasity. We only tell her about our desire to take the colony world, something the State would prepare for anyhow. That’s only half our plan. We focus on the colony world; she never has to know about the rest.”

  Rowen sat back in the bed as he slowly mulled over her words. “We have to talk to everyone and proceed with extreme caution.”

  Ursa leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on his shoulder. “We always are.”

  A bitter laugh escaped his lips. “Apparently, not careful enough.”

  Chapter 16

  Lewis

  The moment the bedroom door closed, he turned to her. “I’m sorry, Freya. I really am. You have to understand that we need to press every advantage we have.”

  Her jaw clenched, her body rigid. “I get it. It’s exactly what Victor said. My raw emotion would make this all more believable.” She walked over to the window, still fuming. “I have to hand it to you—you’re good. I didn’t even know she was there, and you just exposed me to her like it was totally natural.”

  Lewis tried to utter some words of comfort, but she acted as though she couldn’t hear him.

  She needs to process.

  “I just hate this,” she spat as her eyes glossed over once again. “I hate that those tears were real. I wish I could just pretend like you.”

  His tension eased as he realized she was angry at being sent on this mission to begin with rather than at him. Freya was still so delicate. He eventually directed her attention to their next actions.

  “So, we did exactly what you hoped for when we were exercising?” she asked, taking a bite of her evening meal.

  “No, far more actually.” He placed his plate on his lap and stirred the lukewarm food around. “I didn’t think we would get a shot like that to let her know who you are so fast. And I know you don’t want to hear this, but your tears and my comment about still loving him—that will just make you more approachable.”

  They ate in silence for a time while Freya mulled over his words. “You think she will come to me?”

  “I do now,” Lewis answered in earnest. “I thought it would take weeks of working together for her to find out who you are. If she thinks you have reason to hate the State, even better.”

  Once they finished with their meals, Lewis grabbed her tablet from the nightstand. “Here, you need to log on and get your civil duty assignment. It will look suspicious if you know where to go tomorrow without checking your messages.”

  Freya had calmed down significantly, but he had a bad feeling she wouldn’t like working in the same greenhouse as Ursa.

  Freya furrowed her brows. “I guess I can’t exercise in the mornings anymore. That would be way too early, even if it is just below my greenhouse.”

  Lewis nodded and braced himself for how she would react to realizing just how immersed she was about to become. “It’s far too early, and you have to exercise right after you finish civil duty, like Ursa does.”

  “So, she has the same schedule as me? What does she do for her civil duty?”

  Lewis nearly flinched.

  Here we go.

  “Don’t you know? She’s a greenhouse worker, like you. I’m surprised Colin never told you that. Must’ve been protecting his family.”

  Lewis couldn’t fathom why Colin would withhold such a trivial piece of information, but he doubted it had anything to do with the rebellion. No matter what, he had to keep her focused on why they were sent into this situation to begin with.

  “Or he has a type,” she spat, and stood from the bed. “His girlfriend was one too. Maybe he was afraid he would slip up.”

  Lewis remained silent. He knew it was essential for Freya to believe Colin had left her for another woman, but he also believed the Head of State planted the idea in her mind.

  Lewis looked back at Freya and realized she was staring at him with menacing eyes. “You knew. The State knew. You didn’t react at all when I said he had a girlfriend!”

  His body tensed at the accusation. He messed up. He should have acted surprised to learn she believed Colin had been re-coupled. Now he would have to create another lie to compensate for the State’s lie. If this happened too many times, this mission would crumble to dust along with his career.

  I need to calm her down. Now.

  “Keep your voice down and get control of yourself, Freya. It is in the file, yes. I read it.”

  “So, that was the deal then. If he colonized, he got to get away from me and be with her.”

  She lost any semblance of composure she had been holding as she began to weep.

  He relaxed slightly at her tears; it was better than her yelling.

  “We are sure going to miss that firing range, aren’t we?” he teased, attempting to turn this blunder around.

  Despite her anger, Freya gave a sarcastic laugh and looked away. He used her slight distraction to wrap his arms around her and guide her to the bed. She allowed his touch—something she seemed to grow accustomed to—and nestled into his chest as they lay in bed together.

  He listened to the gentle fall of her breath. Somehow, such a simple moment made his chest contract. There was something about her; she made him feel things he wasn’t accustomed to. Freya excited him in a way that was more than physical or the opportunity for career advancement. It seemed her delicate body fit perfectly against his.

  It was difficult for him to lead her down a faulty path, especially when it was hurting her. The State wan
ted her to believe the story about Colin being re-coupled, and it was his duty to ensure that she did. It may have been part of his mission, but he didn’t like it.

  Her breathing slowed, and he knew she was finally asleep. It felt amazing to have her tucked firmly against him. Despite his military training, he knew that Freya made him feel things he had previously been immune to.

  They slept tucked close together the entire night. She seemed to be comfortable enough with cuddling, but he questioned how she would respond to the possibility of more.