“Then you can say yes.”
“What if, now we’ve talked about it, I don’t want to say yes, but I’m being forced to because we know I can’t really say no?” He smiles cheekily.
I rub my fingers over my temple. “You’re overcomplicating everything. It’s either a yes, or a no. My sister wants to go on a double-date.”
“The sister I met at the mall?”
“I don’t have any other sisters so yes, Tina.”
I wonder what he’s thinking. Is he ready to bolt out of here, or is he thinking of a way to let me down nicely? “Okay,” he says after a few seconds of pause.
“What?” His reply shocks me. “Why would you say yes?” Is there something wrong with him?
“Why would I say no to spending more time with you? I told you, I like you. And if your sister wants to put me through the proverbial wringer, I’m fine with that.”
“But you’re so calm about it.”
“You know what was really obvious to me the day I met you at the mall?” I shake my head. “You and your sister have a tight, special relationship. You both adore each other. Which means she’s protective of you, and I want you to be comfortable around me. So I’ll show up for inspection.”
I want to pinch myself. Dylan is not only incredibly nice looking, he’s also charming and understanding. I just hope he’s not saying what he thinks I want to hear. I mean, he has passed the Zhen test, now he has to pass the Tina test.
“We are. Fiercely protective. We’ve both been given a privileged life, and neither of us want to see it go to waste on something irrelevant.”
“Are you calling me irrelevant?” Dylan’s tone is slightly off. I think I’ve hurt his feelings.
I have to think what to say to tell him, it’s not personal. “Every night I lay in bed, and think to myself, was I the best version of myself today? The nights I can’t sleep, I know I wasn’t. I wasn’t meaning that you’re irrelevant, I’m meaning, I don’t want to be.”
Dylan nods his head. “I like that. That’s actually very deep. It’s something even I wouldn’t think of.”
“Mom has always said I’ve lived a thousand lives already. For some reason, I tend to believe her.”
“I’ll make you a deal. After we double-date with your sister, I’d like to take you to dinner with my Dad. He likes you, and I think it’s important for him to meet you.”
“I’m okay with that.”
“My Dad’s opinion matters a lot to me, just like your family’s opinion matters to you. Dad’s straight up. He tells it like he sees it. He doesn’t sugar coat anything at all.”
“I’m not into bullshit, so I guess your dad and I will get on great.”
“I’m hundred percent sure I’ll be the one walking into the lion’s den.”
“Hey, my family isn’t like that.”
“I wasn’t referring to your family. I was referring to my father.” He laughs. “Just an FYI. He will embarrass me as much as he can.”
“That’s what family does.” Zhen and Zorro got bored with us talking a few moments ago, and went to play. Both come back, but Zhen is limping. “Shit,” I say as I stand and run over to him. I fall to my knees, as Zhen sits. Zorro sits beside me. “What did you do?” I pick Zhen’s paw up, and see he’s got a small twig penetrating his paw pad. “Hang on, let me see. Can I take this out or do we have to go back to Michael?”
“Is he okay?” Dylan asks as he squats beside me.
Zorro swings his head to look at Dylan, but doesn’t move. “I’m not sure. There’s a small twig stuck in the edge of his paw.” I scratch under Zhen’s chin. “Let me see if I can pull it out.” Zhen’s panting heavily. “If he cries, I’m taking him to the vet.”
“Do you want me to do it?” Dylan asks.
“Chivalrous, but no. Zhen probably won’t let you touch him.”
“Okay.”
I tug on the twig, and it has a lot of give. Slowly, I pull it out. The moment it’s out, he starting licking his paw. “I’ve got to get you home so we can put some ointment on it and bandage it up.” Dylan and I both stand. “I have to go, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry. Go, take care of Zhen.”
“Thank you,” I smile, glad he understands. “Um, tomorrow?”
“We’ll talk later. Call or text me after you’ve taken care of Zhen.”
We walk toward the bench seat where the dogs’ leashes are. Zhen’s still limping, but not as bad. It must be sore. Dylan walks us to my car, and opens the back door for the dogs. They both jump in and Dylan closes it.
Fumbling with my keys, I don’t look up to Dylan. “I’ll text you later,” I say stiffly. I’m not sure what happens here.
“Molly, is it okay if I kissed you?”
I know we have a connection. I can feel it. It’s easy and light, and we just meld into each other. I’m not sure I’m ready for this, though. Other than Hank Reed, I’ve never really been kissed. Kissing is so intimate and personal. I imagine souls can connect with a perfect kiss.
“It’s okay,” he says stepping away, obviously affected by my hesitation.
I’ve over thought it. I’ve created this huge monster ready to destroy the thought of being kissed. “I’m sorry,” I say embarrassed. Lowering my head, I refuse to look at Dylan. What a fool. I can’t believe I self-sabotaged what could be with Dylan. “Um, I’ll message you later.” I jump in my car fast, not looking back at Dylan. I’ve made a total mess of this.
I’m in my car and out of there so fast, Dylan is but a mere distant memory.
What an idiot.
What happened?
Frustrated and angry at myself, I drive home.
I messaged you last night, and you didn’t reply. Is Zhen okay?
Ignore.
Is everything okay?
Ignore.
I’m looking forward to our double-date.
Ignore.
I didn’t get any more messages last night. And I didn’t sleep well either. I wasn’t the best version of myself. I was an ass. An ass who let her head get in the way. I roll over, and try to move the blanket up, but Zhen’s sleeping on it, making it hard to shift him. “Move over, Zhen.” That doesn’t work. He’s sleeping hard.
Reaching for my phone, there’s another message from Dylan. Good morning.
I want to reply, but I think it’s best if I don’t. What can I offer him? He asked to kiss me, and I froze. What the hell was that?
I throw the covers back, sit up in bed. Scrubbing my hand over my face, I try to stop thinking about my bizarre behavior yesterday.
Instead I focus on the class I have to teach at eleven. I head into the bathroom, and have a quick shower before getting ready for class.
Turning, I see Zhen’s still asleep on my bed, although he’s moved and is sleeping on his back with his hind legs spread apart, but his front legs are making the motion of running. How cute, and funny. “Zhen,” I say. He jumps up and looks around him. He must’ve been dreaming. “Come on.” I hit my thigh twice, and he jumps off the bed and casually strolls toward me. “Today would be nice.” He takes his time as he walks toward me.
I rush down the stairs, heading into the kitchen, and pour out Zhen’s and Zorro’s kibble. “Do you have a class?” Dad asks from his usual chair at the kitchen table.
“Morning, Dad. I do.” I walk over and give Dad a kiss on the cheek. “Where’s Mom?”
“Still asleep. And your sister’s at Willow’s, so she won’t be back until much later.” Zorro’s lying beside Dad, watching us, but the moment he sees me pouring the kibble, he jumps up happily.
“Yeah, I knew she was there.” I pour myself a coffee, and pop two pieces of bread into the toaster.
Dad’s got his laptop open, and is typing on it. I butter my toast, and take it and my coffee to sit with Dad. He closes his laptop, and pushes it to the side. “Tell me about this boy.”
“Dylan?” I ask and take a bite.
“Are there any others?’
&n
bsp; “No.” I chuckle. “And I don’t think there’ll be anything to tell of him, either.” I avert my gaze, knowing Dad knows what I’m saying.
“Did something happen?” He shuffles in the seat and crosses his arms in front of him.
“No, nothing.”
“Did he do something to you? Try to force you to do something you’re not ready for?” Dad clears his throat. This is uncomfortable, for both of us.
“No, again, nothing like that. I just don’t think we’re, you know… It’s nothing.” I look out the glass back door, to the large, luscious green lawn beyond the patio and the pool. “I, um, it’s just. I don’t know, Dad.”
“What don’t you know?”
“I saw him yesterday. And he’s really great. We get on so well. He gets my dry sense of humor, and we spar against each other. He’s so nice. And Zhen likes him.”
“So, what’s the problem?”
I sigh, lift my mug, and take a sip of my coffee. “I think I am.”
“Why? What happened to make you feel like this?”
I don’t want to tell Dad. I know he’s protective of all of us. And the fact is, I’ve never had a boyfriend before, so he’ll be extra protective of me. “He asked me if he could kiss me.”
“And what happened?” Dad asks in a cool, controlled voice.
I shrug, and slightly shake my head. “I froze. He asked, and I froze. That’s it.” A stupid tear rolls down my cheek, and I quickly wipe it away. My soul feels tender, and bruised. “I think I’m broken.”
“Darling, you’re not broken. You’re scared. And that’s okay to be scared. We can’t always be fearless. Sometimes, we have to let our guards down.”
“I don’t know how, though.”
“First thing you have to do is tell him you’re scared.”
“What if he laughs?”
“Then you lift your chin, you hold your head high, and you get out of there. Because if a man laughs when you tell them you’re feeling vulnerable, they’re not for you. They’re not worthy of you.”
Dad surprises me. His advice is logical and sound. “I might reply to his texts.”
“How many texts has he sent?” his tone is harsh and cold, again.
“Three yesterday after the dog park, and one this morning.”
“Okay, that’s doesn’t qualify as crazy-ass stalker. If it was double-figures or more, I’d be telling you to delete his number and run. But four, that tells me he cares.” He takes a sip of his coffee. “Talk to him. Tell him how you feel. If he’s good for you, then he’ll understand. If he’s not, he won’t.”
Dad’s right. If Dylan is sincere, then he’ll have to understand that I’m not ready for intimacy the way he may be. “Thanks, Dad. I’ve got to get to work. I’ll see you later, okay?”
“I’m taking your mother out to lunch, so we may not be home when you get back.”
“Okay.” I grab my car keys, give Zhen a quick scratch and leave.
Jumping into my car, I head to work.
It’s a good fifteen minutes’ drive, so I turn the volume up, and get into the rhythm of the music.
I find parking around the block from the gym, and pass by the café on the corner. It always smells amazing when I walk past. They make the best muffins. Their apple and cinnamon is my favorite. They’ve got a few tables and chairs on the sidewalk, and those seats are usually occupied.
When I head into the gym. Sky, one of the owners, is standing at the front desk. She’s an absolutely beautiful woman. When she was younger, she was a model and even had been on the cover of Vanity Fair, Vogue, and Elle. Her striking blonde features, and amazing big eyes make her a head turner.
“Hi, Molly,” Sky says and gives me one of her perfect smiles.
“Hi, Sky” I look around to search for Sky’s wife, Charlotte. “Is Charlotte here today?’
“Nah, she’s got a family emergency. I didn’t need to be there, so I’m here and she’s there.”
“Cool.”
“Actually, before you go to class, I wanted to talk to you about something.”
“Sure, what’s up?”
“Before you finished school, you asked if there were any extra classes you could teach. Are you still interested?”
“Yes!” I cry enthusiastically.
Sky smiles. We stop talking for a moment as Sky has a quick chat with one of the regular members who uses the gym facility. “Great. As of next week, we’re changing the class you run. It’s now an under eighteen class, and it’ll be every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Do you think you’d want to teach it?”
“Oh my god? Really? You want me to teach three days a week?”
“Yeah, it seems the kids like you. And we’ve had a lot of calls about taking the class. The classes are yours, if you want to run them.”
“Yes!” I shout again. This time I run around the desk, and give her a big hug. “Thank you. I’m speechless, just…thank you!”
“You’re welcome. I know you’re reliable and hardworking, so it was an obvious choice for us. You’ll get a pay raise too.”
This is a dream for me. I’m so happy Sky and Charlotte have asked me to take the classes. I head up to the classroom, give it a quick vacuum, and get ready for my class.
No one can wipe the smile off my face.
Walking out of the gym, I feel wonderful. I had a great class, and the kids I teach are really respectful and chill. They want to be there; they’re not forced to come. I sling my yoga bag over my shoulder and head toward my car.
But something stops me from taking another step. Every morsel of happiness is sucked out of my body.
I see Dylan at the café, sitting at one of the outdoor tables and talking to a woman with long, brown hair that falls to just above her waist. She’s leaning into him, but he’s sitting back in his chair holding his cup as he laughs at something said in their conversation.
I knew he was too good to be true. He’s not anything like he’s pretended to be. I should’ve known. He stares straight at me.
I can’t move; my feet are grounded to the spot. I can’t believe my eyes. This isn’t real.
Dylan smiles and lifts his hand to wave, but he quickly lowers it. His eyes become large, and his mouth falls open. I’ve caught him in his deceit.
Lowering my head, I find my strength and walk past him.
“Molly,” he calls. I ignore him. I’m so mad at me. I was allowing myself to feel something for him, and he’s with someone else. “Molly.” I have no right to be upset with him. We’ve only gone out twice and we haven’t discussed being exclusive. But it still hurts. It hurts so bad. “Molly!”
I can hear him running behind me. He grabs my arm and swings me around to face him. “Please, no need to explain,” I say trying to remain diplomatic, though really I’m kicking myself internally.
“Explain?” He tilts his head to the side. “Are you upset?”
“No, I’m not.” I muster all my willpower and smile at him. “I have to go.” I try to duck past him, but he stops me again. “Please,” I silently beg for him to spare me.
“Would you like to meet my cousin Gemma?”
I close my eyes, instantly feeling like a fool. “Your cousin.”
“My cousin,” he echoes.
I had jumped ahead and thought the worst of him, when he’s given me no reason to react like this. “I’m sorry,” I say, embarrassed. “I feel like an idiot.”
“Don’t be sorry. I get it, really I do.”
“You do?” I look up at him, still too ashamed to meet his eyes.
“I do. I was seeing a woman two years ago, and I had a gut feeling she was hiding something. It was niggling away at me. I asked her, and she said it was all in my head. It was sending me crazy. Until…” He closes his eyes and shakes his head. Opening them, he struggles to continue, but he does. “Until I saw her having sex with another guy in my car.”
“Oh man,” I say, clutching at my chest.
“Yep.” He screws his mouth up and lo
oks away. “The point is, it devastated me, and I vowed to never make someone else feel like that. If I want to leave, I will tell the person I’m with. I wouldn’t ever cheat on you. I couldn’t do that because I know how much it hurts.” I nod, still avoiding his eyes. “Please, come meet Gemma. I was just telling her about you.”
“You were?”
“I was.” He holds his hand out, and even though my internal voice is still telling me he’s lying, I know he’s not. Self-sabotage at its best.
Hesitantly, I reach to take his hand. Linking our fingers together I notice how warm he is, and how well we fit together. “I’m sorry.” I know he told me I don’t need to be sorry, but I behaved like a crazy stalker.
“I know. Come, meet Gemma.” He leads me over to where he was sitting, and he pulls a chair out for me. “Gemma, this is Molly. Molly, my cousin Gemma.”
Gemma isn’t as blessed in the looks department as Dylan. She’s got a crooked nose, loads of freckles, and her teeth are a little wonky. Her smile is large, and she instantly comes across as really friendly. “Hi,” she says with the biggest smile I’ve ever seen.
“Um, hi.”
“Latte?” Dylan asks. I nod my head. He holds his hand up, getting the attention of the waiter. “Can I get a latte, and do you want something to eat?” he asks.
“Have you got the apple and cinnamon muffins today?” I ask.
“We do,” the waiter replies.
“I’ll have one of those please.”
The waiter writes down my order, and leaves.
“This is probably super awkward for you. So let me tell you a bit about myself. I’m Dylan’s cousin on his dad’s side. My dad and his dad are brothers. Dylan and I grew up together, and hung out a lot when his mom took off. I love long walks on the beach and reading.” She starts laughing. “Romantic movies, and sharing my life with the perfect person.” She sounds like a personal ad.
I can’t help but laugh as well. “Do you live around here?”
“I don’t live far from here. But Dylan and I have brunch once a week.”
“And you picked here?” I point to the café.
“I’m local to here, Molly,” Dylan says.
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