“Marcia Hayes?” Gavin asked softly. “Is that from a sister?”
Nellie wiped at her tears and shook her head. “I don’t have any siblings. Marcia is my…my mom’s name.”
“I thought she’d…” He didn’t finish the sentence, but Nellie knew what he’d tried to say.
“That’s what I thought, too. Either this is really old, or she’s alive.”
Nellie didn’t want to open the letter. Something in her gut told her that she wouldn’t like what it had to say. Nothing good could come out of this now. Her mind ran wild with possibilities until her thoughts grew darker and darker, and she knew she needed to open it.
Shaking, she dug her nail into the envelope and tore. The folded paper inside didn’t look old. She’d been hoping that this letter had been written years ago, in anticipation of disaster. Nellie found herself reading something far more recent.
She covered her mouth to smother a sob.
“What is it? Is everything okay?” Gavin reached for her but didn’t touch her. His hands hovered uncertainly over her.
“My mom is alive.” Nellie couldn’t believe the words she was saying.
Her mother. Alive. After all this time, Nellie had assumed the worst. The letter, however, detailed a story that Nellie never would have expected. Instead of hiding from a dragon man, her mother had willingly left with one. She’d fallen in love, apparently.
“My mom left me for her mate,” Nellie said.
Gavin’s lip curled. He wound an arm around her shoulders and pulled her into his chest. She couldn’t read the letter while it was squished between them. Perhaps that was for the best. Each word thrust a knife through her heart.
Nellie didn’t want to know that she’d been abandoned. She would have rather lived the rest of her life thinking that her mother had been killed. Instead, the dragon man wasn’t the villain. Her mother was.
A fresh sob burst out of her. She couldn’t control it. The tears ran down her face and soaked into Gavin’s shirt.
When she pushed back, she glanced at the pink Victorian. “I don’t want to stay here tonight.”
She’d tried to put her heart into her ancestral home, but she wasn’t sure if this was where she belonged anymore. The crumbling house held nothing for her.
Gavin kissed her forehead and helped her to her feet. He didn’t ask anything of her. He didn’t press, didn’t try to dig for answers. She wanted to say thanks but couldn’t form any more words with her chest as tight as it was.
Back at the cabin, she curled into the far corner of the couch with the hopes that everyone else’s conversation would help temper her pain. Instead, her mind spun. She couldn’t let go of her mother’s confession. It played on repeat, an inescapable litany that made her heart pound until it felt like it might burst.
Across the room, Gavin kept an eye on her. Gold swirled over the green flecks in his gaze. She swallowed and wished she could ask him to hold her. She didn’t dare in this room filled with happy people. Isabella snoozed against Dillon’s chest. Bree and Erik tussled on the floor. Her bracelets chimed like music as Erik rolled her over and pinned her.
Nellie wanted to join in. She yearned to belong somewhere.
Anywhere.
When the sun dipped low, she got up and walked past Gavin toward his bedroom. She thought he would follow, but she found herself alone. Aching and alone, she threw herself onto his bed. Her stomach gave a measly growl, but she ignored it.
Her day had been going so well. It seemed like things had been about to change, like unpredictable spring weather finally giving way to warm sunshine. Instead, it’d tricked her with more misery.
Her mother had left her! No one had snuck in and taken the woman away from Nellie like she’d thought all along. The woman had made the decision to get up and leave without warning, without telling Nellie that maybe it was okay to love a dragon.
She buried her face in her hands. If her mother had stuck around and showed her that love like that was possible, maybe then Nellie wouldn’t have bled herself dry over the fear that had been instilled in her. She wouldn’t be so empty and unsure.
“Looks like you and I both belong to the shitty parents club,” Gavin said.
She pulled her hands away from her face. Gavin had chip bags clutched in one hand and a box of chocolate in the other. He set it all on the nightstand before taking a seat on the edge of the bed.
Nellie watched him while turmoil writhed in her chest. She’d been taught to stay away from Gavin, yet he was the only person she wanted to be around right now. This yearning could have been so much easier to handle if she’d known.
“She betrayed me,” Nellie whispered.
Gavin took a chocolate from the box and unwrapped it. He twisted so he could press it to her lips. The bitter sweetness coated her tongue. He watched, his eyes bleeding gold. Gavin’s beast loved to watch her. It never did anything dangerous or cruel while she was around. It only ever watched, like it wanted to be a part of their interaction.
“Not every person who has a child deserves to be a parent,” Gavin said. “You did just fine without her, and you’ll continue to do fine. Do you know how I know that?”
She opened her mouth for another chocolate. He laughed and obliged, gently placing the candy between her teeth.
“You’re part of my family now. You don’t have to attach yourself to anyone here. You’re part of my clan no matter who you end up loving. I will protect you no matt—”
She got to her knees and silenced him with a kiss. His arms went around her immediately. She swallowed his greedy growl as she pressed her body into his. Together, they fell back onto the bed.
He nipped at her lips while his hands rove over her body. He didn’t hesitate, didn’t shy away from her curves. He touched her like he’d been waiting years to know what she felt like. Insatiable, he kissed his way down her throat. When he ran his teeth over the base of her neck, she shivered and wondered if he would mark her.
“Let me help you make your day a little better,” Gavin whispered against her skin.
Warm hands found her breasts. He ran his thumbs over her nipples and sent more shivers down her spine. The piercings turned her sensitivity up to eleven. Somehow, being with Gavin had amplified it even more. Her throat tightened. She couldn’t tell him how badly she wanted him.
“It’s the least I can do for you,” he said.
He undid the fly of her jeans and hooked his fingers in the waistband. As he tugged, she squirmed, all too ready to be free of the restricting fabric. She wanted her skin pressed against his. Only then would this need in her chest subside.
Nellie had been wrong. The need only intensified when Gavin covered her with his own body. She didn’t know when his own jeans had vanished, only that the heat pouring off him seemed to burn in her core as well.
This man, filled with untold strength and potential for destruction, handled her gently. He trailed his fingers over her folds, a touch so light that she practically begged for more. Still, the thin fabric of her panties separated them. She wanted them gone, so she could have his warm fingers inside her.
“Will you do as I say?” he asked in her ear.
Her lips trembled, but she managed to say, “Yes.”
“Good,” he purred. “Take off your underwear.”
As Gavin sat upright, his gold eyes on her, Nellie shimmied out of her panties. His lips parted at the sight of her. He cupped her sex before looking her in the eye.
“Now your shirt.”
She complied, lifting the tank top over her head. A chill breeze slipped between her and Gavin. It made her nipples taut. He lowered himself and took one between his lips. He grabbed a piercing between his teeth and flicked it with his tongue. His laughter warmed her.
She didn’t know he could take such joy in something so simple.
“You’re going to writhe for me,” he told her.
His fingers parted her folds. While his thumb found the most sensitive part of her, his
fingers entered her. She cried out and bucked. Gavin growled, and she felt the intent behind his motions. The slow circles he’d drawn grew faster. He plunged his fingers deep inside her.
“Say my name,” he demanded before kissing her throat.
She breathed it into the world while pleasure burst through her core. Fireworks exploded inside her from his touch alone. Gavin snarled and squeezed her breast. The touch brought her climax higher until it slowly unfurled through her limbs and curled her toes.
“I’m going to bury myself in you. You’ll forget what every other man felt like when I’m done with you.”
She didn’t want him to be done with her. If Nellie had her way, this would go on forever. His breath quickened as he pulled back. The hard length of him found her folds. He slid between them but didn’t enter her. As he played in her wetness, the head of his cock teased her most sensitive part.
She didn’t know if she could take another climax so soon. It might shatter her. She wasn’t used to this, to being pleased by a man who wanted her this badly. She’d already forgotten every other lover as it was. No one else could fill Gavin’s role.
It was as if they’d been made for one another.
He pulled back. She thought he would enter her once and for all. Then the corners of his mouth quirked. She couldn’t get enough of those gold eyes and the hungry gleam in them.
“I need to see you from every angle,” he growled. “Get on your hands and knees for me.”
Nellie did so without question. The small sound he made behind her made it all worth it. He gave her rear a playful slap. The stinging pain bled into pleasure. She had to press her face into the bedsheets to stifle her groans.
“I’m going to make you mine.”
Good. That was all she wanted. She should have known from the start that no other would ever compare. Gavin had hunted her, had waited patiently for her.
In one, smooth stroke, he filled her to the brim. He put a hand on her back to brace himself. She arched as he ran it over her skin. When he gripped her hips and began a slow, gentle thrust, she felt the tension in his hands. Gavin held himself back for her pleasure.
He must have wanted to take her hard and fast. She wouldn’t have minded, but already Gavin had revived the well of pleasure from earlier. It grew and grew with each stroke until she thought she couldn’t handle it any longer.
She wanted the man who would feed her chocolates in bed when she was sad, the man who took the initiative to fix the broken things in her life. She wanted him so completely, and yet she had no words to let him know. Nellie could only spread her legs wider for him, let him go deeper and deeper.
“Nothing feels as good as you,” he said under his breath. “You’re a little slice of heaven.”
Not her womanhood. Not her body. Nellie, as a whole, was like heaven to him.
She pressed her face into the bedsheets again. Her orgasm rippled in every direction, ten times as strong as her earlier climax. She dug her nails into the plush fabric and tried not to howl.
“Say it again.”
She knew exactly what he wanted, to be in every part of her from her womanhood to her tongue to her mind. She said his name, over and over. His growls deepened and became nigh feral, but she wasn’t afraid. He thrust into her once, twice, so hard she thought she might break. Two new orgasms flashed like Fourth of July fireworks.
Gavin slipped out of her. His groan was low and soft as warmth spilled over her back. She hoped his scent would sink into her skin and brand her so all would know where she belonged.
“You’re a good little witch.” He left the bed, placed a quick kiss on her cheek, then vanished.
Barely a minute later, Gavin returned. He cleaned his seed from her back, took care of the cloth, and paused at the end of the bed. Nellie rolled onto her back. She’d worried, for a moment, that his lust would vanish. Yet, that golden glow remained. He looked her up and down with a voracious grin before crawling onto the bed with her.
He slid his thumb under her chin, his fingers warm against her neck, and ducked to press his lips to her throat. It seemed to be his favorite part of her. Unsure, Nellie reached for him. Her fingers skimmed his bare sides, but she wasn’t sure if she could pull him into her body like she wanted.
Gavin had successfully distracted her from her pain, but she couldn’t tell if there had been more behind his actions. His commands had taken the burden of decision from her. She had lost herself in Gavin and the many ways he could bring her to climax. Could they have more than that, though? Or had this all been to keep her from crying?
With his weight on his hands, he hovered above her. He studied her with those golden eyes. His beast didn’t know how to give them a moment of privacy. The thought made her laugh, which in turn made Gavin tilt his head curiously.
“You’re quiet,” he said. “Do you want me to leave?”
The gold light in his eyes flared as if his beast had spoken, but she couldn’t hear it. He shuddered, and the tremor shook the bed.
“I want…” Nellie didn’t know how to say it. The words had been shoved back for too long. She’d barely allowed herself to imagine a future in which she could say such things.
Especially to the leader of a dragon clan. Here was a man with a fire-breathing beast inside him. He could destroy everything, but he touched her so sweetly. He wasn’t at all the man she’d expected. He was the man she needed.
“I want you to stay,” she said softly.
He responded with a greedy growl as he wrapped his arms around her and rolled them onto their sides. His hand slid down her back to cup one ass cheek. She let out a laugh because her heart felt lighter than ever. Within his embrace, her worry melted away. There was only Gavin and her.
“I meant what I said,” Gavin told her. “I can’t make you feel anything, but you should know that I’m committed to you. My dragon made a choice and there’s no going back now.”
Her heart fumbled, skipping a beat.
“If all you want is tonight, I’ll give you the space you need from now on. You don’t have to stay to make me happy or because you think you owe me anything. I don’t want debts between us, ever.”
“Gavin,” she said as she looked up at him. “I don’t understand.”
His eyes drifted shut when she ran her hand through his russet waves. The way he leaned into her touch made her stomach flip.
“My dragon has chosen you as its mate. I know that’s not what you wanted to hear, but…”
Nellie silenced him with a kiss again. She deepened it, trying another way of speaking with her lips because she couldn’t quite form the words yet. Even if he couldn’t glean what she was trying to say, her kiss silenced him for a while. She didn’t have to listen to him try to give her a way out of this.
She didn’t really want to get out of this. The truth was, she wanted more. The days she’d spent with Gavin had been some of the best in a long time. Her panic attacks hadn’t come back even though she now spent most of her time with the most dangerous shifter for hundreds of miles around.
An electric static sparked through her core. Warm and filled with life, the feeling intensified until Nellie gasped. She left Gavin’s embrace so she could stare at her palms. The power she’d harnessed while trying to help Gavin during the fight was back. Not only had it returned, she could feel it pouring into her well of magic.
That hollow emptiness she’d been carrying around for days vanished. Though her magic seemed different, Nellie celebrated its return. She brought it to her fingertips and watched the sunshine-colored glow of raw magic dance between them.
She laughed and turned her head toward Gavin. “It took getting dicked down to refresh my magic.”
A parade of expressions crossed his face, from alarm to confusion to what she could only call a dead-phone-line-sound as he timed out. She laughed again. Giddiness overwhelmed her.
“Dicked. Down?” Gavin repeated.
“Don’t you know? That’s what they call it these
days.”
He pursed his lips, clearly not convinced. He pulled her back into his body where she could hear the comforting growl in his chest. Nuzzling her hair, he said, “I prefer to call it making love.”
A chill raced up her spine. The warmth in her chest flickered and flared.
Love? She poked at the concept, all at once enticed and afraid of it. Her magic danced through her veins, as if to remind her that change could be great. This wasn’t the power she’d grown up with. This came from another place, one deep in her heart. Could that be love?
Nellie had never really loved before. While Evangeline and Isabella threw their hearts at men, Nellie had remained closed off. She’d found comfort in the arms of men but had never felt the possibility of love. Not like what she’d discovered with Gavin.
Instead of saying anything, Nellie twisted so she could become the little spoon. She bit the inside of her cheek and drowned in her tumultuous emotions. Maybe they would make more sense in the morning.
76
Gavin watched Nellie sleep. He knew his clan would call it creepy, but he liked to know that she was safe and comfortable with him. She’d gone from avoiding him at all costs to resting peacefully in his presence.
The rising sun had dragged him out of bed. To make up for his absence, he placed the giant stuffed sloth where he’d been. Nellie had grabbed onto it almost immediately. His big bad witch was kind of cute.
Gavin wished he’d found her another time, though. This war floating over their heads threatened everything good Gavin had found from his family to the woman he loved. Though Nellie had her magic back and she could help them, Gavin didn’t want her anywhere near this fight.
His father would go after her first. If the silver dragon shifter from the other day had gone back to Zander, then he knew that Gavin had a witch. On his way out of the room, Gavin glanced back. The white streak in her hair reminded him of how he’d ruined her life already.
He had no expectation that she would choose to stay after this was over. Sure, Gavin hoped she would, but he couldn’t force her to do anything. Nellie had lived in fear of his kind for all her life. Lies embedded that deep wouldn’t go away overnight. They had work to do.
Rogue Dragons Series: Box Set Books 1-5 Page 64