“So what you’re telling me is you’re still basically a kid at heart. A big, grown-up gay kid.”
“Exactly. And a big, grown-up gay kid who plays well with others.”
Ken had to admit that he enjoyed their banter, which made the miles pass by more swiftly. And Rick didn’t seem to mind Ken’s teasing and flirtatiousness.
In the heat of the afternoon, they made a detour, stopping at a beach for a swim. From a distance, this particular beach resembled a long, narrow white ribbon dividing the land from the sea. Astonishingly, they once again seemed to have the place to themselves. A sailboat skimming through the waves far out to sea was the only sign of any other human beings.
The temperature had by now hit a sultry eighty degrees, and a refreshing light breeze rustled the palm fronds. What had looked like white sand from a distance in fact turned out to be millions of tiny white fragments of broken seashells washed up onto the shore. The coarse texture felt stimulating underneath Ken’s bare feet as he and Rick got out of the truck and began to strip.
This was the first time he and Rick had seen each other naked in broad daylight and for any length of time, as opposed to fleeting glimpses while they were getting dressed or undressed, or when they slept together in the tent at night. Ken wasn’t the modest type, and he was rather reassured to see that Rick wasn’t, either, judging by the way the actor stood there completely nude in the blazing sunlight, searching through one of his bags. Rick had a beautiful body. Ken had suspected as much from seeing him clothed, especially in the shorts and T-shirts he usually wore ever since they left home. Now Ken had vivid confirmation that his friend possessed not only a nice pair of pecs and an enviably flat stomach with six-pack abs, but also a firm, round ass and a thick, uncircumcised cock, which sagged down casually between his thighs at the moment, complemented by a pair of big plum-colored balls. The breeze blew Rick’s hair about his head, making him look boyish, but boyish in a decidedly sexy way.
Sweet, Ken decided. Lovely to look at, no doubt delightful to hold, and, I’d be willing to bet, heaven to kiss all over. The mere thought of kissing various parts of that bared body, to say nothing of the other things his mouth would be willing and able to do to it, made Ken’s own cock twitch with a restless, nascent desire.
I’m disgusting. I ought to be ashamed of myself. But, in this courtroom of his private thoughts, he was prepared to be not only the defendant, but the judge—and a very lenient judge, at that.
“I know those damn swim trunks of mine are in here somewhere,” Rick was saying.
Ken wasn’t willing to relinquish the pleasurable sight of the other man’s nudity too readily. “Let’s not bother with our swimsuits. Let’s just go in naked.”
“Are you kidding?”
“No. Why shouldn’t we? What’s the matter, have you suddenly turned shy or something?”
“No. But I’m sure it’s against the law.”
“There’s nobody around to see us.”
“Yeah, well, what if somebody does show up and sees us skinny-dipping and is offended and turns us in?”
“Turns us in to whom, exactly?”
“I don’t know. The authorities in general.”
“I’ll risk it. Come on, be a sport.”
“I’m not sure I want to spend the night in some Mexican jail cell, where I’d no doubt end up getting gangbanged.”
“I seriously doubt it would come to that, even in the worst-case scenario. We’d probably get slapped with a warning or a fine, or both at the most. And what makes you so sure you’d be the one who gets gangbanged?”
“It only stands to reason. I’m better-looking than you, and I’m the one who’s an anal virgin.”
“Maybe these theoretical Mexican jailhouse gangbangers of yours prefer experience and skill to virginity.”
“In which case, I suppose, they’d gravitate toward you and leave me alone? Is that what you’re saying?”
“Sure. I’d sacrifice my mouth and my ass to save yours, anytime. I wouldn’t mind taking on a half dozen or so horny Mexican convicts. Or a few really macho Mexican cops, for that matter. I bet I could persuade them to let us go without locking us up. Plea bargaining, you know. It might turn out to be the highlight of the trip, so far.”
“Jesus, Ken! We’d better get you into the water to cool off, before you succumb to some sort of bizarre internal heat stroke as a result of your sheer horniness.”
“Yeah, maybe we’d better. I’ll race you into the water.”
“You’ll lose.”
Ken did lose, because he deliberately held back in order to watch Rick’s buttocks in action as the other man sprinted across the glistening white seashell beach ahead of him. Rick dashed recklessly into the water, sending up a big splash.
“Is it cold?” Ken asked.
“No, it’s wonderful, like warm bath water,” Rick reported.
“Looks like you won the race.”
“That was no sweat. You’re kind of slow,” Rick taunted him.
“Oh, I am, am I? We’ll see about that.”
They got wet, then got out of the ocean only long enough to don snorkels. Then they swam out from the beach toward a reef a short distance away. Colorful fish darted about all around them, apparently not too perturbed by the presence of the two naked human beings. Finally, they swam back to the beach and stretched out, still nude, on a blanket, just lying there motionless and absorbing the sun’s rays.
“The anti-nudity forces have yet to make an appearance,” Ken pointed out. “We seem to have this beautiful beach all to ourselves.”
“Yeah. It’s nice, isn’t it? We needed to take a break from driving. It’s been a long time since I allowed myself to just lie back and laze in the sun. We’d better get some sunscreen on, though.”
“I’ll go get it,” Ken volunteered.
He strode barefoot to the pickup, found a tube of sunscreen, and returned to where Rick was still sprawled on the blanket.
“Let me put some of this on you,” Ken offered.
“Um, you’d like that, wouldn’t you?”
“Sure. What’s not to like? Anyway, it looks as though the cops and convicts aren’t going to show up. So you might as well be a sport and let me have my innocent little cheap thrill.”
“Well, go ahead. Then I’ll do you.” Rick’s voice sounded relaxed to the point of drowsiness.
Ken slicked up both his palms with the sunscreen, then began to smear it over Rick’s torso. Rick’s skin felt hot to his touch.
“Oh, that feels good,” Rick murmured.
“Does it? You’ve got a nice body.”
“Thanks. So do you.”
“As a hot young leading man, I suppose you have to keep in shape,” Ken teased.
“Yeah. And as a self-employed businessman with a lot of free time on his hands, I suppose you spend a lot of time at the gym too,” Rick retorted. “Checking out the other members, cruising and being cruised.”
“Exactly. Are you beginning to entertain any libidinous thoughts?”
“Ken, you have the most incredible way of talking sometimes. ‘Libidinous,’ no less. Where the hell did that come from?”
“I’m not just a pretty face, a hot body, and a big cock, you know. I’m a college graduate.”
“Obviously. You must read a lot, to have acquired such a large vocabulary.”
“And you must work out a lot, to have acquired all these muscles. Come on, roll over and I’ll do your back. And your butt,” Ken dared to add. “You don’t want to end up with a sunburned ass and not be able to sit down comfortably.”
“Perish the thought.”
Rick obligingly rolled over onto his stomach, and Ken gave his shoulders and back a little massage. “How does that feel?” Ken asked.
“Good. Consider yourself hired. Are you getting off on this?”
“A little. Do you mind?”
“I’m in a mellow frame of mind. In no mood to protest. Just don’t let yourself get too carried aw
ay, buddy.”
Ken began to apply the sunscreen to Rick’s buttocks. “That’s a hard little ass you’ve got there.”
“Is that the kind of a man’s ass that turns you on?”
“All men’s asses turn me on,” Ken confessed. “Even a fat, jiggly pair of buns can be nice to shove your dick in between.”
“Do you really like to fuck other guys?”
“Why all these questions?”
“I’m just making polite conversation. Trying to get to know you better and get some sense of exactly what goes on inside that head of yours. Seriously, Ken, are you a top or a bottom?”
“I don’t think I have a preference. I like it either way. I really get off on being with a guy who can flip-flop. You know, take it one minute, then dish it out the next. Taking turns like that can be really exciting.”
“Interesting.”
Ken had made his way down Rick’s thighs and calves to his feet, and was now giving him a foot massage with the sunscreen.
“There you go,” Ken said. “You’re thoroughly greased up. You’re not going to burn on my watch.” He continued to hold Rick’s right foot in his hands, kneading the sole with both thumbs.
“All kidding aside, you’re actually very good at this. At giving a massage, I mean. I suppose I’d better reciprocate.”
“I suppose you’d better,” Ken said, trying to sound light and airy about it. “Assuming you can do so without compromising that precious heterosexual virtue of yours.”
Rick rolled over and sat up. “Turn around,” he instructed. “I’ll start with your back.”
Ken relaxed as Rick slathered him with the sunscreen. Rick didn’t seem to have any inhibitions about touching him. He, too, did a good job of it. He even rubbed the cream into Ken’s bare buttocks.
“So tell me,” Ken asked, as he enjoyed the massage. “Haven’t you ever been attracted to another guy?”
“You mean ‘attracted’ as in sexually?”
“What else?”
“I don’t know. Of course I had crushes on older guys when I was in high school. You know, I wanted to be just like the big jocks, and I wanted them to take notice of me and like me. I guess every kid goes through that stage. Like we were talking about before.”
“Sure.”
“But I never did anything. You hear guys talking about how they fooled around with their buddies when they were kids, you know, trading hand jobs and even blow jobs. I never did anything like that. I was, like, totally repressed.”
“That’s funny. Because I was the exact opposite. I fooled around with other guys every chance I got. And I was really young when I started. What I didn’t do was mess around with girls. I was completely uninterested in them. I was totally gay from a very young age.”
“Lucky you. I mean, that you didn’t go through any ambivalence. That must’ve made it easier for you.”
“Oh, not necessarily. I knew that a lot of people thought homosexuality was wrong. Something to be ashamed of, something to be suppressed and lied about. I had to deal with that.”
“That must’ve been rough.”
“It wasn’t always easy. But as you see, I survived.”
“You didn’t just survive. You seem to have positively thrived. But to get back to your question, I have to admit it, I liked it in Russia when Viktor would be nice to me. It’s not that he ever came on to me. But he’d talk to me, just the two of us, with his arm around me. He’d sort of squeeze my shoulder or touch my face, you know? It was sexual, but at the same time it wasn’t really, in a way. It just felt good. It was like talking, really intimately, to my father. I guess that sounds pretty damn Freudian. If that makes me queer, then so be it. I don’t give a shit.”
“It hardly makes you queer. It sounds nice, that’s all. I’m rather envious.”
When he was finished coating Ken with the sunscreen, Rick lay back down beside him. They sunned themselves lazily, like two lizards basking in the sun.
“This is wonderful,” Rick murmured. “I’d like to just stay here forever. Do nothing, think about nothing, take responsibility for nothing.”
“My sentiments exactly.”
But even this innocent pleasure had to end sometime. Eventually they roused themselves, got dressed, and got back on the road. As they did so, the sky began to cloud up.
“You don’t think it’ll actually rain, do you?” Rick asked.
“Some of those clouds do look kind of dark. It might even storm before the day’s over.”
“The air’s getting much cooler too. It’s kind of refreshing, actually, after being in the hot sun for so long.”
As the afternoon wore on, however, refreshing began to yield to downright chilly. By then, Rick and Ken were ready to make camp earlier than usual. During their evening meal, the sky grew increasingly black and ominous, and the wind stirred up annoying dust clouds all around them. They ended up carrying their food inside the tent, to keep from swallowing stray dust particles.
Gusts of wind shook the tent, and after double-checking to make sure that it was well pegged down, the two men rolled up beach towels and miscellaneous items of clothing and inserted them in the gaps between the tent walls and the edges of their sleeping bags in order to provide additional insulation. As the sun set, obscured by the thick clouds on the horizon, Ken hoped that the gale might die down, but its fierce, intermittent blasts continued to assault the tent.
Even though it was still early, they settled into their sleeping bags. Once again, Ken bundled up in his sweats. He was astonished and more than a little envious to see that Rick nonchalantly stripped down to his boxers, as usual, and then sat up in his double bag, bare-chested and looking more comfortable than any man had a right to in these weather conditions. Rick read a book while Ken updated his journal. Finally, they turned out the lamp and lay huddled together, listening to the wind and watching clouds scud across the dark sky.
As he settled down and tried to doze off, Ken heard rain striking the outside of the tent. The air that penetrated the interior now felt decidedly damp as well as cold.
“It’s going to be another rough night,” Rick observed. “I know I planned to come down here at this time of year to avoid the really hot weather, but this is ridiculous.”
“Listen. It’s raining harder. Think the tent will hold up?”
“Of course it will. How are you holding up? You seem kind of restless.”
“I’m having trouble getting comfortable, let alone falling asleep. Christ, it’s cold!” Ken complained.
“Yeah. And that sleeping bag of yours doesn’t look like it’s up to much.”
“Well, it’s old and worn-out. I thought I’d be using it as a glorified ground cloth, mostly. I didn’t think I’d be relying on it for warmth. You, on the other hand, have the latest in state-of-the-art, luxury sleeping bags, I see. And a double, besides.”
“I was supposed to be sharing this with my wife, remember?”
“Yeah. The best-laid plans, as they say.” Ken shivered. “Fuck! I’m freezing. I can’t believe this. We might as well be in Canada, up at the Arctic Circle.”
“Oh, don’t exaggerate. But seriously, are you really that cold?”
“That clicking sound you hear is my teeth chattering.”
“You’d better crawl in here with me.”
Ken couldn’t believe what he just heard. “You’re kidding, aren’t you?”
“No, I’m not. I don’t mind sharing. And, to be perfectly honest, I wouldn’t say no to having a little extra body warmth next to me.”
“You’d better be careful what you wish for. I seem to recall that the guys in Brokeback Mountain started out like this.”
“Oh yeah. I forgot about that.”
“So feel free to retract your kind offer. I won’t feel insulted.”
“But I’d feel guilty, lying here nice and warm while you’re shivering.”
“No need for you to feel that way. Forget about it. I’ll be all right.”
&n
bsp; “Oh for God’s sake. Get in here with me. It’s not as though anything’s going to happen.”
“Isn’t it?” Ken’s tone of voice conveyed disappointment, even to his own ears.
“It isn’t. Let’s face it. You’re no cowboy, and I’m no suppressed closet case.”
“Too bad for me you aren’t. I’d bring you out fast, and for good.”
“Oh, shut up and get your ass in here. Before I rescind the offer.”
Ken was no fool, so he moved quickly, extracting himself from his own sleeping bag, crossing the short distance to where Rick lay, and wriggling inside Rick’s much better insulated and more commodious sleeping bag, next to him. Rick adjusted his position to make room for Ken, who soon found himself sandwiched between two lightweight layers of warm, quilted material.
“Um, this is toasty,” Ken declared. “What’s this thing filled with?”
“Besides us? Some sort of space age, hi-tech miracle insulation, according to the manufacturer. It wasn’t cheap, but now I’m glad I didn’t pinch pennies.”
They fell silent for a moment as both men listened to the sound of the wind outside the tent.
“Sheep herders,” Ken said.
“Huh?”
“The guys in Brokeback Mountain. They weren’t cowboys. They were sheepherders, technically. Shepherds.”
“That’s right. I forgot. I bet if they hadn’t started fucking each other, they’d have ended up fucking the sheep.”
Ken laughed. “Which wouldn’t have been nearly as romantic. Although I suppose sheep have feelings too. At least for other sheep.”
“They weren’t gay, either,” Rick said. “The two guys, I mean, not the sheep.”
“Huh? They sure acted as though they were pretty damn gay to me.”
“They were bisexual, technically. They both got married. And Ennis didn’t have any trouble having sex with women. He only had difficulty talking to them. He had intimacy issues. And Jack was the only guy he ever seemed interested in.”
“That’s true. I hadn’t thought of that.”
“Most gay men—I mean most exclusively gay men—are promiscuous by their very natures.”
“Oh, really? And what’s made you such an expert on exclusively gay men?”
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