by Nova Drake
“The fact that you’re on the floor says otherwise.”
She rolled her eyes. “Cut me some slack. I’m not really in the best shape of my life here.” Jess held up her wrist and checked out the lingering shadow. It had faded significantly since her polar bath. “In fact, this was kind of a low point in my life. It hit my top three for sure, and that’s saying something. I’ve had a pretty shitty life. But you were there for me. I just can’t figure out why.” Her fear of Creepy still lingered, but she had a point to prove here. She reached out her good hand. “Help me up.”
He looked at her with surprise, but then reached out a hand and gently drew her up off the floor while she clutched her slipping towel.
“Thanks.” Jess stepped back and sat on the couch again. “So you can change your eyes at will?”
“No.”
“No, you don’t have control over when your eyes change?”
“No, I can’t change my eyes at all.”
Now she was confused. “You’re eyes are normal right now.” She noted the eerie feeling in his stare and corrected herself. “Normal-ish.”
“My eyes always look the way they were. I can project my image differently in your mind to make you see them as normal. Normal-ish.” He corrected, and Jess smiled. “That’s why everyone’s afraid of me. I can trick you into thinking I look normal, but deep down, you still know. Your gut instinct still tells you what I am. What you’re really seeing. Even if your rational mind tells you it’s not there.”
“And you don’t just project. You have to be able to get information from people’s minds too. I never called you Creepy guy out loud.”
“I can pull information also, typically things at the foremost part of your mind will come to me. I can dig into your thoughts as well, but it’s noticeable.”
Jess took a deep breath, understanding exactly what he meant. “You’ve done it to me twice before tonight.” Her eyes narrowed. “At least.”
“Yes.”
“Yeah, that’s not going to fly. You’ve been in my head. You’re going to have to spill your guts now. I want answers.”
“About?”
“I want to know why you helped me.”
He’d already avoided her question twice now. “I don’t know. You didn’t deserve to get hurt.”
“You don’t have a lot of friends, do you?”
“Neither do you.”
Jess shook her head. “Wouldn’t want to put anyone in danger. You?”
“No interest.”
Right. “The creepy factor makes it kinda hard for people to talk with you, huh? But I didn’t act like the rest of them, did I?”
He shifted his weight but didn’t answer. It was enough to know she was right. She was probably the only person that tried to joke around with him since he changed.
“Next question. I think it would be easier to give me your name at this point.”
After a moment of hesitation, he gave her a short nod. “Perhaps, but I don’t have one to give.”
“What?”
“I don’t have a name.”
“How the hell do you not have a name? You’re full of it. You just don’t want to tell me.”
He sighed. “I don’t have one. I would tell you.”
"What do people call you?"
"People don't call me anything. No one knows me."
"What about the people you work for?"
His jaw clenched. "I don't work for anyone anymore."
She’d hit a nerve on that one. "Okay, what about before? What did your family call you? Wait, I thought you said Niyazine..." Jess managed to catch herself before she used the word monsters. "You said they had no higher thinking, animal-like, instinctive and dangerous. Ring a bell? That's not you."
"No? I'm both dangerous and driven by instinct. The higher thinking... that's an anomaly."
"You lost your memory, too. You don't know who you were and that's why you don't know your name," Jess concluded.
He looked away. "I was no different than any of the others."
"Okay well, you remember being a part of the Niyazine trials, right? Or was it the shit that’s being sold on the streets?"
"I was infected in a lab."
"What did they call you there?"
"I was numbered, like the other subjects, 261EZA."
It was starting to sound like those trials weren’t as shut down as they claimed. Jess wrinkled her nose, his name was supposed to be a simple question, and it was turning into a bit of a fiasco. "Why don't you just pick a name?"
"Why?"
"Because neither creepy guy, nor 261EZA is very easy to say."
Creepy shrugged as though that was her problem.
She sized him up for a moment. "You said you can project images to make your eyes appear normal. Is it just the eyes, or is there more?"
"Mostly the eyes, but it's enough. I might as well look like the other monsters for how people react."
Jess frowned. "It's not that bad. You're a little scary..."
Inky blackness bled through his eyes before the last word had even spilled from her lips. Her breath caught, and the blood drained from her face, but she couldn't look away from that soulless void. She was vaguely aware that another shiver gave her away. Her mouth went dry, and her heart pounded so damn hard he had to be able to hear it. But she swallowed hard and forced herself to remember who he really was.
"Okay, so it's a lot fucking scary," she eked out at barely a whisper.
Creepy’s eyes changed back, and she tried to get her voice working. "But it doesn't change who you are. People being afraid of you is generally a good thing. It's something I've had to work hard for."
"I know."
Jess's eyes narrowed. "You read me twice. What did you see?"
He shrugged. "The first time, I heard you asking about me. I needed to know who you were. When I dug for information, I learned what you were looking for and that you weren't a threat to me. The second time, I searched for where you were heading so I could get you there safely." Creepy looked away.
Nope. She'd handled too many interrogations to believe that load of crap. "I didn't ask what you searched for. I asked what you saw."
"I see things that are close to the surface. Things that are on your mind while I look for what I need."
"You saw everything that happened to me. I told Cash about my brothers and my parents and you saw that, didn't you?"
"Yes."
"So now you know my sad story. Tell me yours." If this guy had dirt on her, she needed to know his. He had all the leverage.
"It's irrelevant."
"Not to me. I want to know."
He didn’t answer.
"Fine. You owe me a history lesson. Was that the first kiss you remember?"
Creepy's eyes narrowed slightly before moving away. That was a pretty clear answer. It must be kinda hard to pick up partners when you give everyone the creeps. He probably didn’t like the reminder that he had no memories of anything that came before, either. For all he knew, he might already have a partner.
"I'm sorry. If I'd known, I wouldn't have..." Jess frowned. "I tend to just do whatever I want. I had to fend for myself and fight for what I wanted early on. I’m not shy about... well, about anything, really. That was just how I had to be. No one has never minded when I take charge. No one's ever cared that I didn't know them. None of them bothered to get my name either. It didn’t occur to me at the time that you would be any different."
Creepy looked uncomfortable again. Jess laughed. His stoic nature seemed to come more from not having any idea how to interact with people than it did any actual attempt to be intimidating. "You can relax. It wasn't going to go any further than a kiss. I'm too sore for anything more. I can barely walk." She nodded toward his hand. "You're probably feeling pretty shitty too."
He glanced down at his hand. "It's fine. I'm used to it," he murmured.
Jess tipped her head, pondering his answer. "You knew how to treat the pain because yo
u've been through that before. Obviously, why else would you know about it and have a remedy."
He said nothing. She couldn't imagine dealing with that on her own. She suddenly had a lot of sympathy and respect for him. Neither of those was something she doled out easily.
“How is it that I was ready to…” Jess swallowed hard at the memory of what she’d gone through. “Why didn’t it affect you the same way? I don’t really have a low pain tolerance but that was…” she shook her head, unable to finish her sentence.
“He held on long enough to kill you. Not many people could survive what you went through. I only touched him for a second. When he reached for you again, he was going to finish what he’s started.”
“I almost let him,” Jess trailed off again. “Did you put Ryker in my head?”
“I needed time to get close enough to distract him.”
“So you must have done it again when I almost…” Jess looked down at her hands. When her eyes made their way back up, his expression was unreadable. “Thank you for stopping me.”
Another quick nod came in response.
She licked her lips while she tried to gather her thoughts. “So is Smoky an old friend of yours? You said you were used to it,” she added nodding toward his shadowed knuckles. “And you obviously know how to treat it. Seems like you two have some history.”
“Yes and no.”
Jess smirked. “Well, that explains it.”
He eyed her questioningly. Quite the conversationalist, this one was.
“You ever been hit by his toxin for that long?”
His features hardened. “Yes.”
Okay, and he still seemed capable of carrying on and taking out anyone he needed to. Then again, she didn’t have his abilities. “So, I gotta ask.” Her eyes settled on the cuffs around his wrists. “Did you handle it as well as I did?” Jess knew she wouldn’t have lived through that if he wasn’t there to help her.
He stared back at her, clearly with no intent to answer.
Jess frowned. She looked down at the small puncture wound on her wrist and sighed. “See here’s the thing, I’ve always been kind of a cocky little shit. My dad started training me to fight pretty much as soon as I could walk, and I always had a natural talent for it, just like him. My brothers trained with him too, but neither of them took an interest like I did. And neither of them was as good as I was. So I kinda went through life with this idea in my head that I was pretty badass. For a kid, maybe I was. I never backed down from a fight, the biggest and strongest kids couldn’t touch me, and they knew it. Walking down dark alleys at night never bothered me. Shitty neighborhoods didn’t scare me. I’d walk right past an armed thug without a second thought.
“The only person I ever considered tougher than me was my father. When he was killed, it was a sobering experience. It was the first time I considered that I wasn’t invincible. He was the strongest person I knew and if he could die, so could I. While I grew up a little with that notion, I also had nothing left to lose.”
“Once I was forced to take matters into my own hands, I had a lot of rage, and I was a little short on giving a shit about anything else. Back then, every injury I survived only made me feel stronger. I always recovered. I always got right back up. A little pain only distracted from the real pain of losing everyone I cared about.”
“I can’t do what I need to do if I’m constantly second-guessing and afraid of getting hurt. That was never a problem before. I’ve gone into every fight thinking that nothing they did could really hurt me. You know, not really hurt me.” Jess busied herself with examining her wrist. Her voice was a little too meek when she started talking again. “But now, I guess Smoky showed me that I do have something to be afraid of, and I’m kinda struggling with what that means.”
Jess stretched her aching legs out as she spoke, her whole body still hurt, like she’d been set on fire and then put out with a steam roller. But it was a huge improvement from where she’d started. She held her wrist up in front of her, her hands still visibly trembling, even though she’d warmed up considerably. “But I think it’s more the memory that’s getting to me now. Does that make sense?” She let her gaze drift back up. Creepy’s expression had softened slightly.
“No one else has survived exposure for that long,” he said simply.
“You did. And I wouldn’t have if it wasn’t for you.”
“I had help as well.”
“When you say no one else has survived for that long, you’re referring to…?”
“During his time in the lab, several lab workers came in contact with his skin or his toxin at some point. It took several deaths before they found something that would counteract the effects somewhat, and break it down more quickly.”
“Not to be an asshole, but why would they keep someone so dangerous around? Obviously, ethics aren’t at the top of their priority list. Why didn’t they get rid of him? I mean, he escaped, and now he’s a danger to the rest of the world.”
“He didn’t escape. They don’t want him dead because he has a very powerful weapon that they’ve been able to use to their advantage.”
“He didn’t escape?”
“He was released.”
Jess’s jaw dropped. “Why would they do that?”
His jaw clenched. “For me.”
“You’re being hunted by them because you escaped? Sunshine and Smoky were out looking for you?”
“Yes. This was the first time I’ve seen him outside of the lab. The girl I’ve seen before. They must know she’s dead.”
“So, he got to you while you were still in the lab?”
“No.”
“Uh, I thought you said you’d been hit by as much of the toxin as I have?”
“That wasn’t his doing. It was the lab workers. They extract his toxin and use it as a way to control the others.”
Jess went a little pale. “They injected you with his toxin?”
“They created a device that can release a small amount of the toxin into the system with the push of a button. They implanted them in all of us. Except for him. His own toxin has no effect on him.”
Holy shit, it was so much worse than she’d imagined. “So, if you escaped, why haven’t they released the toxin in you?”
He pulled the cuff off his wrist to reveal his scars. “I removed the implants.”
“Oh.” So she was weaker than him.
He noticed her reaction and frowned. “I tried to do the same thing. One of the lab workers took pity on me and did for me what I did for you. She was someone who'd been working there for years while I was experimented on. She’d grown to feel sorry for me over time. Everything I know about myself, I took from her head.”
“Years?” Her throat closed up around the word. “What the hell did they do to you for years?” she whispered. The original trials had only been a few years ago. He had to have been one of the first.
He looked away again, his features hard and cold. Everything she’d been through in her life seemed to pale in comparison. She was left shaken to her core after a few minutes of exposure to a world he’d spent years in. A chill ran down her spine, and he noticed.
“Are you cold again?”
“I’m still kinda wet and half-naked here. My clothes are still wet. Otherwise, I’d go. I don’t want to push my luck, and you seem to like this solitude thing you have going on here.”
“You should rest. Take the bed. I’ll sleep on the couch.” He turned and walked away, returning a moment later with a black shirt.
Jess took the shirt from him. “I’ll take the couch. After everything you’ve done, there’s not a chance in hell I’m taking your bed too.”
He gave her a confused look. “It’s fine,” he mumbled.
“Not happening. Turn around for a sec.”
Once his back was turned, she stripped off her wet bra and underwear and pulled on the shirt, which was long enough to cover everything important nicely. So much better. She dried her hair with the damp t
owel.
“Thank you again.”
He gave another of his trademark nods, and this time she wanted to throw something at his head a little less for it. Creepy gave her a blanket, and she settled in on the couch.
Chapter 21